Tony let out a rancous laugh seeing the dessert spill on Mrs. Mason.
"Well, I've seen all sorts of tricks to make a group memorable. But this takes the cake." Tony glanced back at the horrified dark haired boy who looked like he was ready to bolt. Well if the purple faced Walrus was any indication it probably wasn't a bad idea for the kid.
"Well! I have never been so insulted in all my life!" Mrs. Mason declared enraged at the family. "We're leaving!"
"Coming dear," Mr. Mason said quickly getting to his feet. Tony just sat comfortably holding a smirk on his face. From being one of the worst business experiences he had experienced personally, to being one of the most enjoyable experiences he had in a while. All courtesy of the dark haired boy who everyone was glaring at.
The Walrus man began trying to soothe it over with them.
"I'm terribly sorry. That's just our nephew. He's very disturbed and meeting strangers upsets him, so we keep him upstairs-"
"You often lock children upstairs?" Tony asked in a knowing voice. He didn't like the sound of that.
"No! We just do what we can for his mental health-"
"He seems fine to me. Hey kid you speak?"
"He's-"
"I wasn't asking you Verizon."
"Veri- Sir my name is Vernon."
"Yeah, yeah. Hey kid what's your name?"
"Harry sir."
"You mentally disturbed Harry?"
"I erm... I don't believe so sir."
"Can you eat a dinner with strangers without throwing a fit?"
"I believe so," he responded with a bit more snark. Tony's smirk grew slightly.
"Any reason you weren't with us for dinner tonight then?" he asked. He heard the door open, most likely the visiting couple about to leave but then pausing at the door to see what would happen. It wasn't often many mortals feasted their eyes on his glorious self effecting their world on a more personal level.
The kid looked at the two who obviously were his guardians if he actually lived here and seemed to judge their reactions. Tony could practically feel their seething rage and from the young beach ball, confusion. He looked Tony Stark in the eye and said, "I was in my room, being so quiet it was like I didn't exist." His voice was quiet but strong, full of conviction.
A shriek intterrupted the moment however as an owl of all things flew in through the open door past the Masons. Mrs. Mason's face paled at an alarming rate turning more ashen as she screamed, hightailing it out of the house covered in cream as her husband ran after her.
Tony was fully amused as the family seemed wary of the owl. Being the ever cocky man that he was, he took the letter.
"Don't!" the woman cried out as Tony casusally opened the letter.
"Dear Mister Potter, yadda yadda," he skimmed through the letter and confirmed what he already suspected.
"Hocus pocus kid? Something from somewhere called the ministry of magic?"
The boy-Potter-kid walked forward and took the letter from Tony. The woman was pale as death where the husband seemed to be rapidly shifting to a perilous puce color.
"That-that's perposterous Mr. Stark. There's no such thing as magic-"
"Oh I know. But what it actually is science has yet to determine. Afterall, I have two kids in my tower who can pull similar tricks."
"You're not scared?" the beach ball kid blurted out. His eyes were wide with wonder as if it a kid like shorty here could actually be terrifying.
"No. Why should I?"
It was a simple phrase, but it held a heavy air as the owl flew away.
"You still in school kid?"
"I am."
"Great. I can't get to any of your magic places "unescorted" and I promised I'd bring back some souvenirs so you coming?"
"You are not taking tha- HIM out of this house."
"Too late tonight? I could come back tommorow. We didn't get to talk about why I was even here. Not the best way to do business is it?"
A forced smile came to Vernon's face.
"Of course," he forced out, "Harry would be happy to be your guide tomorrow. About-?"
"I'll show up when I'm ready."
And with his usual devil may care attitude, he sauntered out the door feeling back in control of his business, his life and the people around him.
"You know, if we had known about your school list sooner, we would have just flown in with Tony," Clint muttered slipping a ball cap on Ron's head after getting the last scan through from the airport and the MAGIC agents responsible for making sure they didn't disappear. Hermione had the decency to blush as she was the real motivation for returning to Britain when they were.
"Well, how often will we have the chance to meet the writer of a successful campaign to better the world?" Hermione defended.
"I don't know, when is Tony starting his memoir?" Bruce joked. Clint looked mock horrified.
"Don't even joke about that. Then he will truly be the empitomy of insufferable."
"I don't know dad. It could be fun. You know he'll need to have people review it."
"I know my review. Best kindling I ever bought. Three out of ten, would burn again."
Ron laughed as Hermione instinctively smacked his dad's arm, a rather tame reaction from her when someone mentioned destroying books. She then looked scandalized as she realized she hit an adult. Clint just laughed.
"Bruce! I think she got your temper!"
I did something wild. I really did. It feels fun. At least for me it does. The energy, the power. The ever growing ego of Tony Freaking Anthony Stark! And of course, soon enough we're going to be meeting another famous ego.
Sounds fun right?