So...I can already feel this fanfic will have a shit ton of chapters. I'm gonna give you a list of things I plan on incorporating sooner or later.

1. Clace!
2. A new Clary: one that won't take bullshit, one that refused to accept bullshit
3. A mysterious boy at the Institute *wink wink* (only to make a certain someone jealous ehehhe it will be explained later)

So, somebody did ask me to have Luke and Raph move closer to her. I respect this comment, and I think it's plausible. But, in order to have her heal she needs to take on this obstacle alone. Luke and Raph won't always be there, and I guess her going to the Institute is like a reminder of that.

Enjoy!

"Don't think that I can explain it
What can I say, it's complicated"

~ Bad Things by MGK ft. Camilla Cabello

It was the week before Christmas, and Clary was nowhere close to being better. If anything, she was even more broken. She couldn't handle the anxiety attacks that made it hard for her to breath, and being in a close proximity with a person made her panic. Nightmares flooded her brain, and she was plagued with grotesque thoughts. Ultimately, it was her decision whether she wanted to go to the Institute or not.

She decided to go.

The press hounded her all the time, making it impossible for her to leave the hospital in peace. Clary was released yesterday, and she was grateful, because she hated the hospital. She was now in Luke's living room, and Luke, Raph, Jon, and Jocelyn were standing around her.

Jocelyn looked at Clary, tears forming in her eyes. "I know I messed up, but I'm trying to be there for you Clary. I'm trying to be your mom. Please give me a chance?"

Clary was tired of being a bitch to her mom. Yes, her mother had borderline shitty reasons to leave her, but after seeing Valentine's true colors, Clary understood. "Yes..mom. I'll call everybody once a week and fill you in on everything. Promise."

Jocelyn smiled at her, and Clary moved her attention to Luke and Raphael. "I'm sorry for being like this. It's just that I-"

Raphael interrupted Clary with a wave of his hand. "Mi amor, please. You helped us in so many ways, and this is one of the small things we can do to help. You're leaving in...three days right?"

Currently, it was Thursday night, and tomorrow would be Clary's last day at Alicante High until senior year. Clary was scared. She was afraid of leaving everything she cared about behind, but she had to.

Clary sighed, and slunk into the sofa. "Yup. I leave on Sunday. I barely have any clothes, so I'm going to the mall after school in Saturday to get some more clothes. I have the money, I swear I do."

Clary was going to the mall to get clothes, but she also needed some alone time. She remembered the money she had saved up all those years. Clary had went back once to get her money, but that was way before Valentine took her. In total, she had about $750 or so dollars, and she finally allowed herself to let loose and spend some of it.

Jon shrugged. "I can drive you there, if you want." Clary smiled at him, and nodded in agreement.

So far, so good.

It was Friday, and Raphael drove her to school. From the moment she stepped outside of her car, there were whispered surrounding her. She walked to her locker with her head down, and felt the entire hallway stop and stare at her.

When she reached her destination, she gasped. There were cards, flowers, and so much more flooding her locker. Clary gently plucked one of the flowers, and smelled it. She smiled, and began to take every card and place it in her bag.

Then she felt a presence behind her. Panic flooded her body, and she trembled in fear. When she turned around, she saw Alec, Isabelle, Jacce and Simon.

"What do you want?" she whispered. Clary trembled even more, and her body refused to listen to her brain. They all looked upset, except Jace, whose face was blank and emotionless.

Isabelle's eyes teared up. "Clary...we heard you were leaving. Is this because of...us?"

Clary backed up against her locker, and when Isabelle took a step forward, she whimpered. "Please...leave me alone. I don't want this right now. Go."

It was a short and simple command, one that all of them listened to, except Jace. He took a deep breath, and then cleared his throat. "Clary..I know you're leaving for a while. I don't know where, but I know you won't be coming back till senior year. Can I just...can we maybe keep in touch? I really want to start over with you. Please."

His words made Clary remember what he had said at the hospital.

"You were nothing like I expected. You're kind, beautiful, and sweet. Plus, your music taste isn't half bad. But..I want you to know that, if you do wake up...I want a fresh start. Maybe we can be friends? It's completely up to you. If you don't accept my apology, I get it. Nobody in their right mind would. But then again...you've always been special."

Clary's brain screamed at her to push Jace away. But she couldn't. When she heard him in the hospital, she knew he was telling the truth. She could feel it. Maybe he wouldn't be as bad as he seemed?

She nodded her head at him, and smiled. "I would like that. Also...Jace, I heard everything you told me in the hospital. I just wanted you to know that. My number is..." Jace stared at her in shock, but nodded his head. She knew he didn't think she would actually listen to everything he had said.

After exchanging numbers, they walked to class together, and for once, there was no animosity between them.

When it was lunch, Clary went to her normal spot by the tree. She found Magnus leaning against the tree, and when he saw her he started crying. Once she came close enough to her, he grabbed her and hugged her.

"Clary, oh god," he sobbed. "I-I was terrified, are you ok.." Clary tuned him out, and she thought she would freak out when he hugged her. She felt somewhat comfortable in Magnus's arms, even though she was slightly anxious that he was this close to her.

Clary couldn't concentrate, and she started panicking. She wasn't able to handle the physical contact, so she jumped out of his arms, and walked back a couple steps. She was breathing hard, and the panic started setting in. Once she was able to calm herself down, she saw Magnus looking at her, his cat eyes holding anguish.

Clary took a shuddering breath. "Magnus, I'm sorry, I just c-can't handle contact right now. It's too much for me to handle. I-I"

Magnus interrupted her. "Biscuit, it's ok. I'm sorry. Stop apologizing! You didn't do anything wrong. I just wanted to talk to you. But first, I want to know if you're leaving? Rumor has it that you are..I just wanted to see if it's true."

Clary looked down at her hands. "I am. There's a mental institution there, and it's going to help me...heal. Maybe not entirely, but enough so that I can handle being around people."

Magnus looked crestfallen. "I see. Is there any way you can-"

Clary looked at him sadly. "No. This is the only way. But...if you want to spend some more time with me...you could come shopping with me tomorrow. Only if you want too." Magnus looked happier when she mentioned shopping.

"Of course I'll come with you biscuit."

Review!