Chapter Three

"WHY DO YOU ALWAYS TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE LIKE I'M SOME KIND OF SECRETARY?!"

Zuko sighed and rubbed his temples, already feeling a headache forming. He picks his words carefully.

"I can assure you, Katara, I never intended for you to feel like I was using you. You are a Master of your bending, and one of my closest friends. I would never treat you like a secretary."

"So then WHY do you always tell me, and apparently only me, where you are going? What gives, Zuko?!"

He gestured for her to sit and after a moment she does, fury still written in her features. He stands and comes around the desk, sitting on the edge as he faces her.

"Do you remember, back when we were hiding on Ember Island, all the stories you told me? About your family and friends?"

She nods, confusion starting to cloud her anger.

"When you talked about your dad, and Aang, I might have… read a little into those conversations. And made an assumption about you."

"And what did you assume?" she asks. The venom is still in her voice, but it's softer now.

"That," he clears his throat, "that you have abandonment issues."

The confusion is replaced by a look of pure shock. She stares at him, mouth slightly agape, for a few minutes. "I… You… Abandonment issues?" she stutters, struggling to string together a full sentence.

He nods, trying to be as gentle as he can. "I know you forgave him, but when you talked about your dad leaving you and Sokka it sounded like something that still really hurt you." He bites his lip, debating his next words before pressing on. "It was the same way you talked about Aang running off."

There is a sadness creeping into her features. All he wants to do is hold her, apologize, do anything to make her feel better. Instead he sits, waiting for her reaction.

"So you've… you decided that telling me where you are would help?"

"I know it's probably all messed up, but I thought if you always knew where I was, you would know I'm always here for you."

She takes in a sudden breath, before looking down and fiddling with an imaginary thread on her skirt. "Aang never…" she trails off. She doesn't finish the thought, but she doesn't have to. Zuko understands.

"I'm sorry. Like I said, I never meant for you to feel like I was using you. I just wanted you to know, I'm not going anywhere."

She looks up at him, then, a small smile tugging at her lips. She seems to be searching for any traces of lying in his features, but when she doesn't find it her smile widens.

"I forgive you, Zuko. I guess I should be thanking you. I think your execution is poor, but I appreciate the fact that you cared enough to think of me that way," she says. She suddenly looks shy, and looks away, fiddling with her skirt again. "Besides, I've sort of been doing the same thing for you. Except, you don't have abandonment issues."

It's Zuko's turn to be surprised. "What?! What are you talking about?!"

"I sort of, when you talked about your family, realized… you're afraid of becoming like Ozai. At least, that's what it seemed like to me. So I, uh, I make sure I point out your differences whenever I can."

Zuko's mind was reeling. Everything she was saying made sense, but it had never occurred to him until that moment to connect the dots. Suddenly it all clicked. All the times she defended him, in front of council men, ambassadors, dignitaries, even Aang. All of the letters, their conversations, it all hit him. But why would she do that? When no one else cared to notice his insecurities?

"Mai never…" he trailed off, and he knows he doesn't have to finish that sentence because Katara understands better than anyone in the world what it's like to be with someone who chooses to ignore pieces of you.

Katara reaches to grab and squeeze his hand. "I'm sorry, Zuko, I didn't mean to cross any lines."

He let out a short bark of laughter. "Katara you have nothing to apologize for. If anything I should be thanking you. You've been subtly helping me overcome my biggest fear for two and half years. Although, now that you mention it, maybe it wasn't so subtle after all."

She laughs. "And you telling me your schedule for the day at breakfast when I was two seats away from you was subtle?"

"Touché."

They sit for a moment, both contemplating their revelations, before Katara stands and hugs him. He sinks into her embrace, and for just a moment he lets himself enjoy the feeling of home that comes from her touch. She pulls away far too early for his liking and heads to the door, but pauses before she leaves. "Hey Zuko?"

"Yeah?"

"I think the fact that you care enough about me to do something as ridiculous as turning me into your secretary should prove to you that you are nothing like Ozai. He would never care like that."

He pauses, letting her words sink in. "I think you're right."

She nods. "Good night, Zuko," she whispers. And then she is gone.

He doesn't find out until lunch the next day that after she left his office, she went to find Aang and broke up with him, and had boarded a ship that morning for the Northern Water Tribe. He panics that Aang will find out about their conversation, that he could try and blame Zuko for the breakup. He figures Katara didn't mention it, though, because Aang keeps switching from anger that Katara was jealous of the Air Acolytes, and sadness because she was his "forever girl." Sokka and Suki do their best to cheer him up, but Zuko tries to encourage Aang to understand Katara's point of view.

He finally gets a letter a week later, and when he reads it he feels a tightness in his chest he didn't realize was there start to relax.

Dear Zuko,

I know what you're thinking, and no, I did not break up with Aang because of what you said. I mean, in a way your words were the final push, but I haven't been happy with Aang for a while now. I'm tired of being treated like my greatest accomplishment in life is dating the Avatar. I'm not sure I got Aang to understand that, so I'm sorry if you had to deal with him after I left.

I've decided to continue my training as a healer. I think it's the best use of my talents right now. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. But I'm rather excited about the idea that it's my choice now.

I hope you aren't too mad at me for leaving without telling you. I needed to catch the ship before anyone could convince me to stay.

Yours,

Katara

A/N: I really appreciate your reviews and feedback! Seriously, this is a hobby for me (and by and large a coping mechanism for the shitshow that is 2020) but I do want to get better and I do want to interact with people who are into Zutara and ATLA. You can always say hi on tumblr as well gemgirl28