Trauma

Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin

Stavroula G: Petra helps Levi with a crying five-year-old Mikasa.

The high-pitched wail was very hard to ignore.

Petra's eyes flew open and she sighed. Again? Up until a few days ago, her acknowledgment of the existence of her neighbor Levi had been almost nonexistent. It was limited to an exchange of polite greetings in the hallway. That was about the extent of their relationship.

Then one day, out of the blue, he was walking with a little girl clutching his hand tightly. Her mind had automatically assumed either he was babysitting her or they were related somehow because they shared a few similar features. It wasn't until the little girl became a regular occurrence Petra realized she was living with him.

She had only spared the thought a minute. She figured he was the father and had gotten full custody. Until the crying started.

Now she was convinced he was an uncle or cousin who'd taken in a recently orphaned relative. She doubted he'd woken one day and decided to adopt a child when his behavior told her he had no experience in the matter.

The wail pitched slightly just then.

Turning over and covering her head to block out the noise, she couldn't understand why he was having such a hard time. Children cried, it was normal. What wasn't normal was the abnormal amount of time the girl spent crying and the emotion behind the screams. Was she experiencing night terrors?

Apparently she wasn't the only one becoming increasingly tired of the noise. The pounding on the door told her one of their neighbors had had enough. Finally. She sighed happily, sinking her face into her pillow. Some peace and quiet.

A week had passed and Petra was fast changing her stance on not sticking her nose into Levi's business.

The screaming was becoming an every night thing and it was very worrying. Was there something really wrong with the child? If so, was she getting help? Or, Petra was somewhat skeptical to think, was Levi at fault here? He'd never shown any inclination to prove that. It's not like I know him that well. Or at all, really.

The situation was getting out of hand though. Many of the other occupants of the building were talking, and she was honestly surprised no one had called the cops yet. Although she could guess why. Unlike many abused kids who wore long-sleeved shirts and pants to cover their bruises, Mikasa mostly wore dresses because of the sunny weather. And she would often cling to Levi whenever Petra saw them together.

The apartment's occupants were starting to reach their limit and it was only a matter of time before someone called the police. Maybe she should talk to him. It'd be better off coming from her, considering her occupation. From the pronounced scowl on his usually apathetic face, Petra knew Levi was getting fed up, too, by people constantly breaking out into whispers around him and looking to place the blame squarely on his shoulders. They couldn't very well go after the little girl.

Petra finalized her decision the next day when she ran into the child. "Hi, Mikasa," she greeted her with a smile. "You're taking the stairs, too?"

Mikasa didn't say anything, only clutching the mail in her hands tightly and nodding.

"I'm trying to add a little more cardio to my day, too, little by little."

The girl nodded again.

"How was school?"

Mikasa shrugged, looking straight ahead. "Okay."

She should be more sociable and active at this age. Petra was worried about the blank expression and empty eyes. Before she could speak further, they reached their floor and saw Levi waiting. The anxious expression was replaced by irritation at Petra's presence.

He'd wanted to follow Mikasa down to the mailboxes but she'd said, in the same deadpanned tone that matched her expression, she thought he wanted her to try and do it herself. It was less than five minutes and he knew the doorman wouldn't let out her out by herself without checking in with him first. Having the freedom to work from home, he always drove her to and from school, rarely leaving her by herself.

Petra wanted to start the conversation on a nicer subject and asked. "How are you doing?"

"Fine," he said, itching to get inside.

She moved forward to continue. "Listen, I—"

"I don't need your help." He slammed the door shut, unwilling to subject himself to her misconceptions or misguided attempts to help.

Damn, he's on edge because of everyone. But she had to talk to him. If her suspicions were true, she couldn't stop. That night, she waited until enough time had passed and their neighbors were asleep. Knocking quietly on the door, Petra waited patiently. From the dark circles she had seen under Levi's eyes earlier, she knew he wasn't sleeping either. He would likely be awake and hear her soft knock.

Sure enough, the door opened to his tired face. Sympathy welled up in her for him. "Before you slam the door in my face again you should know I'm a kindergarten teacher and I think I know what might be going on," she rushed out. He blinked at her silently and she took it as an invitation to continue. "Can I come in?"

After throwing a hesitant glance over his shoulder, Levi moved aside. "So," he folded his arms, regarding her warily, "what do you have to say?"

"Like I said, my profession has me dealing with kids all day, so I know when one is experiencing something out of the ordinary. At first, I thought Mikasa was having night terrors. Then I contemplated if she had been abused." Petra held up her hand as she saw his demeanor shift from reserved to furious and spoke quickly. "Not by you. From her demeanor, it's obvious she feels she with you. And after talking to her the other day and taking her situation into consideration, I'm guessing it's trauma, not abuse. Mikasa's suffering from PTSD, isn't she?"

From the way his shoulders slumped, she knew Levi had come to the same conclusion long before her. "How did you figure it out?"

"You seemed a little clueless, no offense, about raising a kid so I assumed she was placed with you because she lost her parents. It fit. Did she...?"

"Robbery-homicide," Levi told her. "She and her parents came home earlier than planned and walked in on him trying to escape. He shot them right in front of her."

"That's... I can't even imagine what she must be going through." Just imagining the sobbing child calling for help, having to report her own parents' murder, it made her sick.

Levi rubbed his eyes and ran his hands through his hair. "She's seeing her school counselor. Mikasa's talking a little more now. It's helping." Initially, she had refused to part from him, always wanting him within her arm's reach or at least within sight, making him thankful for being able to work from home. Now she could stand to separate from him without having an anxiety attack.

Petra took a breath. "I've seen something like this before. Except where Mikasa retreated into herself, he became explosive and acted out, quick to anger and violence, always picking fights. He improved a lot with the help from a specialist. I know because he's a third grader now at the school I work. Maybe you should get in touch with a specialist, too. I can give you his number."

"I don't know. Mikasa seems almost comfortable with her current counselor now. I don't want her to have a sudden change and—"

Petra practically jumped a foot in the air at the scream. Without thinking, she followed Levi into the bedroom. "What are you doing?" She grabbed his arm before he reached the terrified girl.

"Let go! I have to wake her!"

"Look at her! She's just a child and it's very real to her! If you wake her up now she'll be disorientated and you'll only scare her further, looming over her!" The resistance faltered at her words. "She'll be very confused and cry to herself with her mind still stuck in the nightmare."

"What—what do I do?" He asked, looking helpless. "I can't leave her, she might hurt herself."

"Just do it gently, okay? Call her name until she wakes up."

Petra hugged herself, watching Levi kneel on the carpet, trying to wake Mikasa. Her reaction went as predicted: she curled up and cried. Petra placed a hand on his shoulder. "C'mon, you can't do anything for now. Give her a few minutes."

"Mikasa loved her mom's tea. It relaxes her." Levi explained as he made tea. "And I know how she made it." Watching him pour it into a brand new cup decorated by a popular children's cartoon character, she felt her heart go out to him. He was really trying. Levi paused, carefully holding the hot teacup. "Sorry, I should have asked if you wanted a cup."

"It's okay." Petra shook her head. "I should go home now. I have work tomorrow."

"Before you go, can you give me this special's name?"

Petra paused at the door, feeling a little saddened, before moving to her apartment. She laid the grocery bags on the countertop and began putting the food away. Over a month had passed since Levi and Mikasa had moved out. He had told her about suggesting Dr. Erwin Smith to Mikasa's counselor and she'd approved happily. Two weeks later, Petra had gone on a vacation to visit her parents for ten days.

When she came back, the two had moved out. She would have liked to know if they were okay. They had lived right next door and never considered exchanging phones numbers. I'm such an idiot, why would we? It's not like we talked that often.

Dr. Smith was the star of his field. Mikasa would do well with him helping her. Petra still lamented a little. She shook her head, focusing on a brighter thing. It was almost summertime. While she would have meetings to attend and children to tutor because there were still bills to pay, she'd have a lot more free time.

There was no use in sulking. It's such a nice day. She should be out enjoying herself. With a book and purse in hand, she made way for her favorite cafe, ordering a nice cold fruity drink. When she turned around, Levi was the last person she was expecting to find. "Oh! Levi! What are you doing here?"

"Looking for you, actually. I know this place is your favorite. I've seen you holding drinks with their logo," he explained at her confused face. "And it was on your friend's social media page. I couldn't find yours, but I found some info about you on one of your friend's pages and I just wanted to confirm what I knew. I wasn't being creepy or whatever. It's just those things are a veritable treasure trove for predators."

"Yeah."

"I've made it very awkward, haven't I?"

"A little bit."

"Sorry," he said, wincing. "I wanted to say thank you for recommending Dr. Smith."

"Mikasa's doing better, then?"

His shoulders relaxed and she noticed he had lost the dark circles under his eyes. "Yes, she's made much progress. And I just wanted to say thank you. I'm not really good with in-person interaction so I figured online was a good way to go."

"Yeah, I'm not really big on social media."

Levi shoved his hands into his pockets "Anyway, I was going to offer to buy you something, but I guess I'm a little late."

"Maybe you can do it tomorrow," Petra offered with a smile.

"Yes," he agreed quickly,and cleared his throat. "I guess I'll see you later."

"Say hi to Mikasa for me."

"Will do."

With a satisfied smile on her face, Petra walked out, making plans to buy a pair of shoes for the cute dress she hadn't had a chance to wear yet.

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