Chapter Sixteen

Han and Leia jumped to their feet, and sprang apart. Leia felt guilty, annoyed at herself for feeling that way.

Isolder stalked around the pool and stood in front of Han, his fist raised near Solo's nose. "I am trained in the Hapan martial arts, and I shall make short work of thee, Thou Worthless Corellian."

"How dare you spy on me," Leia hissed out, her guilt dissolving into anger. "You have no right."

"I am defending thy honor, my Beloved!"

"Honor?" Leia spluttered out. "Beloved? Since when do you care anything about honor? Since when do you consider me beloved?"

"I do not wish to see you defile yourself with this low-class malefactor," Isolder stated, never removing his eyes from Han's face. "He is unclean, and you cannot allow yourself to have relations with him."

Han shook his head as he took a step back from the taller man's fist. He looked over at Leia, unsure if he should be amused or offended. "Does he always talk like that? Thee? Thou? Defile? Relations?... Seriously?"

"You have had relations with no less than twelve women since you married me," Leia snarled, aware that there was now a sizable audience. Many of the Hapans had left the ballroom and were now watching, transfixed, at the scene taking place across the shimmering blue pool.

"Tis not the same. The women I have adored lately are all Hapans," Isolder sniffed, waving his clenched fist in Han's general direction. "That one I am certain is unclean. It is against the law, as you are well aware."

"Okay," Han said, getting more than a little miffed at the pompous Prince. "In the past minute you've called me worthless, low-class and a...malefactor? I'll ignore all those insults, 'cuz I've been called worse things, although I gotta admit being called a malefactor is a new one. But that's the second time you've called me unclean. I'll have you know I took a shower after the concert. I ain't unclean, Hutt Slime."

"He is a fool," Isolder said, looking at his seething wife. "If you must relieve your baser desires, then find a suitable Hapan. My mother has certainly offered you some of the finest she owns."

Han blinked, taken aback, trying to comprehend what he was hearing. "His mother owns people? As in slaves?" The Leia he knew and loved would never have considered aligning herself with slavers, not even for the most righteous cause.

"They are not slaves, you miscreant," Isolder deigned to reply directly to Han. "They are all well-paid and well-cared for concubines." He turned his haughtly gaze back to his wife. "If this Corsucanti Labels agrees to sell this reprobate to my mother, she may eventually share him with you, much later. After she becomes bored with him."

So the Queen Mother must have confided in her son her desire to purchase Evin Daysun, Leia thought darkly. "Evin is not for sale, at any price," Leia said, shaking her head in disgust. The longer she lived with them, the more the Royal Hapan family repelled her.

Scratching the back of his neck and frowning in confusion, Han asked, "What?"

Leia looked up at Han. "Queen Filamina asked Lando if she could buy you, for twenty million credits."

Han's eyes widened, then he grinned. "Twenty million? If I'd have had that kinda offer three years ago, I might've sold myself."

"That would not be a surprise to anyone, you Corellian gigolo," Isolder said, folding his arms across his chest. He gazed down at his petite wife. "I should never have agreed to marry someone as beneath my station as you have proven yourself to be."

"That's enough," Han roared out, aware that Luke and Corran were both rounding the far end of the pool to intervene. "Insult me all ya want, but ya ain't insultin' Leia!"

At that point Isolder took a swing at Han, connecting with the Corellian's right cheek and Han immediately launched himself at the much taller Hapan, tackling him around the waist. For a moment, both men rolled on the duracrete and struggled at the edge of the pool before falling over into the water with a loud splash.

"HAN!" Leia screamed out, watching as both men sank beneath the surface, still fighting. She looked frantically at her brother. "Do something! Isolder could drown him!"

Luke shut his eyes and concentrated, levitating Isolder out of the pool as he still swung his arms in frantic fighting. The Hapan suddenly realized he was being held high aloft without any visible means and stopped flaying. The Jedi glanced down, making sure that Han was okay, and saw his friend pulling himself out of the water and hoisting up onto the edge before twisting around to sit down, his feet still dangling in the water.

"PUT ME DOWN, YOU ... FORNICATING TRANSGRESSOR!" Isolder shouted, not really knowing who or what he was shouting at.

Han looked up at Leia who was standing over him. Water dripped into his eyes. "I'll bet he got top grades in vocabulary when he was in school, huh, Princess?"

Laughing in relief, the Princess dropped to her knees and wrapped her arms around Han, ignoring the fact her gown was getting thoroughly soaked. "I'm sure he got better grades in school than you did," she whispered into his ear. "But he sure doesn't get good grades in the bedroom from me."

"So you're sayin' I'm better in the sack?" Han asked, not quite as softly as Leia would have liked.

"Much better. Top grades, in fact." She pulled Han to his feet. "Let's go get you into some dry clothes."

"Your wish is my command, Sweetheart," Han said, putting his soaked sleeve over her shoulders. They both walked away, ignoring the Hapan guests that were still gaping, as well as Lando, who was yelling up toward the Prince and accusing Isolder of damaging Coruscanti Labels valuable property.

Corran walked over to Luke, who was still holding Isolder above the pool with the Force. "What did I hear Leia call Evin?"

"Hon," Luke muttered, hoping Corran wouldn't pick up on the lie. "She called him 'hon.' Short for honey."

"Oh, okay."

Luke waited a few more seconds before releasing Isolder back into the pool with an impressive, and probably painful, belly-flop.

Leia dabbed bacta cream on Han's cheek as he sat on the edge of his bed, wearing a thick, dark blue bathrobe. "That's going to be swollen for a few days."

Tentatively Han touched his face, wincing in pain. "That guy packs a punch, that's for sure. I hope it's better in four days, since I got another concert I gotta sing by then. My fans don't want to see me lookin' all bruised up."

The Princess smiled down at Han. "You can always wear makeup."

Solo shook his head negatively. "Makeup don't stay on during a concert. I get way too sweaty and it just runs right off."

"So you've actually tried wearing makeup on stage?" she asked, lifting an eyebrow.

Han flushed. "Not during a concert. But I've got to wear it when I'm shooting holo-vids. Even then it runs off under all those hot lights."

He started to rub his cheek, and Leia grabbed his wrist. "Stop it. You'll take the bacta off that I just applied." Then she took notice of another bruise, this one on his right hand on the soft area under his thumb. It was a red, circular mark, and it looked fresh. "What's this bruise?"

Han gave the mark a quick glance. "Oh, that's nothin'."

She could tell he didn't want her to know, and she had no intention of letting it go. "Tell me."

"It's, uh, just a bite mark."

"A bite mark?" Leia asked, eyes wide. "Who bit you? Or will I be sorry for asking?" She really didn't want to hear about his latest lover, because she had no delusions that Han wouldn't have multiple opportunities every night with women. He would have had no reason to remain faithful to her over the past three years, and she was not about to judge him. How could she judge, anyway? She was the one that left him to marry another man.

Han knew what she was thinking. "It's not that, Leia. It was just a...fan. I was kneeling down on stage and reaching over to take her hand so she could pull herself up closer to get a kiss, and she bit my hand. It happens."

Leia blinked. "It happens? It's happened before? Your fans bite you?"

"Yeah," Han shrugged nonchalantly, looking back at the mark. "This one ain't too bad. Didn't break the skin or nothing."

"I cannot... I simply cannot fathom your life now, Han," Leia said, shaking her head. "Makeup. Fringes. Bites from rabid fans."

"Hope to hell they ain't rabid, Princess, but my life sure is interesting," Han admitted ruefully. Then he gave a sharp look up at Leia. "What's with your mother-in-law wanting to buy me? And what's with Isolder saying I ain't clean? Talk about being around bizarre people. I'm not so sure my life is any stranger than yours."

Leia sat down on the bed next to Han. "I don't want to explain what they mean by unclean. It's... embarrassing."

"We've been pretty intimate in the past, honey. How embarrassing could it be?"

"They have laws against having hair."

Han appeared surprised, immediately glancing up at her head. "Hair? Your hair looks just as long as it ever did, and your crazy-ass husband has longer hair than you do."

Leia cast her eyes down to her lap, quite deliberately. "Not on top of the head. In, um, a more delicate area."

It took Han a second, then it dawned on him what she meant. He laughed. "Are you kiddin' me?"

"No, I'm quite serious." She felt her cheeks get hot. "I had to, err, before my wedding night, take care of things. It's the law. Hapans can't have relations with ..." she trailed off, too embarrassed to continue.

"Huh."

"That's it? Huh?"

"Well, no. What I would like to say is that you ain't Hapan, and I've always liked to break laws." Han stood up, and removed his robe. He was wearing nothing under, and he smirked as he noted that Leia wasn't casting her eyes away. "Laws can be real annoying sometimes. Especially stupid ones."

Leia felt herself get lightheaded. "Don't you have to go back to the after-show party?" she managed to whisper, forcing her gaze upward to his face.

"Do you think Lando will fire me?" he asked, his voice husky with desire as he put one knee on the bed next to the Princess. "I remember once tellin' you'd I'd wiggle just for you. Remember that time on the Falcon, when you caught me dancing for those kids?"

"I remember. I told you to go shake it out of the airlock."

"Oh, yeah. That's what you did say. You still feel that way?"

"Not a single bit." Leia suddenly no longer cared about Hapan laws, or after-show parties. She had Han back, different than before, but he was still the man she loved and that was all that mattered. It was time to reclaim what belonged to her and she wasn't going to have to pay twenty million in Hapan gemstones to get it, either.