Prank War

Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin

Guest: Levi and Petra prank each other.

The sweet scent hit her the second she stepped into the house. Petra sniffed the air curiously. She found Levi in the kitchen, lips pulling into a wide smile at the white box full of round treats on the countertop. "Donuts?"

"They're for you."

Petra tried to recall if it was a special occasion. "Why'd you get them?"

"Because I know you love them."

She beamed, rushing forward and hugging him tightly. "You are the best boyfriend."

"I know." He kissed the top of her head. "Here." He picked one up and held it to her mouth. She bit it eagerly. The expression of delight shifted to confusion before revulsion.

Petra covered her mouth and grabbed a napkin, making a gagging sound.

Levi started to laugh.

"That's disgusting!" Petra said after spitting the donut into the napkin. She smacked her mouth, a grossed out look on her face at the taste. "Is that mayonnaise?"

"Yes!" Her boyfriend continued to laugh. "You should have seen the look on your face!"

Petra made a sound of rage and lunged after him. He ducked away, still amused.

"It was just a little joke," he said when she gave up the chase and stomped to their room, slamming the door. "Petra?"

"You're still mad." Levi glanced at the other end of the couch where his girlfriend sat as far away as possible.

There was a knock at the door.

"You get it."

He stood up and went to get their pizza. His stomach rumbled when he opened the box.

"Can you get me the cherry flavored soda? I put one in the fridge. Pour it in a glass."

"Okay." Levi pulled out the lone can with little cherries and took out a glass from the cupboard. "Shit!" He cursed when the carbonated drink burst out as he opened the can.

"Looks like I might have shaken it a little too much when I put it in there," Petra said innocently.

"C'mon," Levi whined. He grabbed a paper towel and wiped the liquid from his shirt. "You know I hate getting my clothes dirty."

"And you know I love baked sweets, but that didn't stop you from desecrating that poor donut."

Levi narrowed his eyes at her, smiling smugly at him.

"Do you want some scrambled eggs?"

"Yes, thanks."

Levi cracked an egg and began adding salt and pepper and other ingredients. Petra subtly watched him to make sure there was no funny business. She had seen the challenging look in his eyes the other night and knew he was up to something. But she saw nothing suspicious and they sat together to eat.

"Do you want some grape juice?"

"Sure."

He poured them both a glass and sat down. Petra observed him take a sip in her peripheral vision before deciding it was safe. Petra almost spat the nasty juice out.

Levi smirked. "Sorry, did I say grape juice? I meant prune juice." He knew she liked to take big sips of juice. Prune juice was bearable only in small amounts.

"So that's how it's going to be, huh?" Petra had a glint in her eye.

Levi exhaled, turning over. There was no warm body by his side. His arm reached out. Nothing.

Gray eyes opened to an empty bed. The room was silent. He was sure it was Petra's day off. Feeling somewhat disappointed, he turned over, tugging the covers up.

Then his eyes shot up. He sat up. What the?

The entire surface of the floor was covered in cups of water. Levi gaped at them. How the hell did she pull this off?

It was going to take him forever to get out of there.

Well, looks like she's better at this than I thought. He was quite excited by the challenge.

Petra checked everything.

She was taking extreme caution so she would not fall into any of Levi's traps. Every time she opened a door, she made sure to let it swing open, waiting in case he rigged something to fall on her head. Like a bucket of ice water. And she made sure there was nothing funky in the toothpaste and her shampoo and conditioner. She even checked her shoes for fake bugs.

So far, nothing.

Her home office looked the same as ever. But Petra eyed everything suspiciously. The desk seemed to be clean. She shook her chair. It was sturdy and didn't fall apart. Nodding in satisfaction, she relaxed. The door was locked and she was safe.

The moment her bottom touched the chair a loud horn blew. Petra screamed and jumped away, her heart almost in her throat.

She swore fiercely when she saw the airhorn duct taped to the bottom, hearing Levi's rumbling laughter coming from the adjacent room.

Levi had been tiptoeing around Petra for days now. She had declared revenge for the airhorn and he was waiting to see what she would do.

An excited squeal came from the living room. Curiously, he poked his head out of the dining room, forgetting about his lunch to go investigate. Petra seemed to be looking around for something. "Box cutter, box cutter," she muttered. "The garage!"

It's in the kitchen. Levi thought, opening his mouth to tell her.

Before he could speak, Petra giggled. "He'll never see it coming!"

Levi perked up. I see. He smirked. He waited until he heard her open the door connecting the house to the garage before running into the kitchen to receive the box cutter. Quickly, he sliced the cardboard with the blade. He pulled the lid away in excitement to see what she had planned to use against him next.

A clown face suddenly sprang up and Levi shrieked, falling back on the sofa.

Petra's bell-like laughter came from behind. "You fell for it!"

Dammit!

"Are you kidding me?" Petra stared disbelievingly at the sight before her. "Levi," she growled. Having already hit her home office, she had expected him to go for a different target.

The smug bastard chose that moment to show his stupid face. "Something the matter?"

"I can't believe you!"

"What?"

"What do you mean what? Look at this!" The room was filled with balloons in every color. There had to be a hundred of them.

"Now I wonder how that happened."

"You've been home all day," she pointed out, tone accusing.

"Maybe someone snuck in while I was upstairs and did this to surprise you. You do love balloons."

A pale pink one bumped against Petra's leg. She stomped on it angrily. The exploding sound was oddly satisfying to hear. "You're going to pay for this."

Levi walked from his work building to the parking garage. I wonder what Petra has planned. She had been pretty sneaky and tricked him the last time and he was almost eager to see what she would do next.

It was an unspoken understanding between them that they were to take turns pranking each other.

When he neared his car, his precious and most prized possession, he noticed a neon green sticky note with a half-smoked joint on the hood. Levi's feet quickened, heart picking up speed. He snatched the note that said: sorry about the scratch, bro.

Making a strangled sound, he eyed his beloved car, looking for the scrape. He spat out curses, running frantically around the vehicle. Where is it? He searched wildly.

Levi's phone buzzed. A text from Petra: JK ;) There's no scratch! Gotcha!

The anxiety vanished. Petra! He looked around, trying to find her, but she was nowhere to be seen.

"Hi." Petra smiled when Levi came home. "How was your day?" He shot her a dirty look. "C'mere," she waved him over.

Levi regarded her warily.

"I won't bite," she said in amusement.

He approached with reservation. She wrapped herself around him the moment he sat down. "I can't believe you did that. My heart nearly stopped," he grumbled.

"All's fair in love and war. A prank war that you started."

"Fine."

"So you admit defeat?"

"Let's call it a draw."

"Deal."

"How'd you know when to text me?"

"I roped Hange into it and she enlisted the help of the security guard, Moblit. He saw you on the security cameras. Look," Petra held up her phone, "he sent me the video a minute ago." Levi rolled his eyes when she giggled, watching him run around like a headless chicken. "Aw, don't worry. I won't show it to anyone. Except Hange."

"You will not."

"She was my co-conspirator. I promised—"

Levi quickly pinned her on the couch. "You are not sending Four-Eyes that video."

"Or what?" Her amber eyes sparkled with mischief.

He poked her in the side, causing the woman to squeal. "No!" She gasped. Levi continued to tickle her. Petra shrieked in laughter. "Okay, okay! Okay! I won't! I won't!" He found it quite delightful, listening to her giggle. "Levi," she whined, sounding breathless.

Levi finally stopped the attack. Her cheeks were flushed, chest rising and falling with each deep breath, looking so beautiful. He pressed little kisses on her cheeks, forehead, nose, all over, drawing a soft sigh.

"I love you," he muttered, his lips brushing against hers.

Petra hummed, eyes closed. "Love you, too."

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