Love Struck Delusion
Chapter 301 - Broken father.
Zeta's POV.
Pepper and I remained where we were told to wait and when we saw Raptor and the doctor coming back to us; we immediately noticed Raptor was holding a green folder between his arms. Within touching distance I asked him.
"How'd it go?"
I could tell he was just crying a minute ago. He looked destroyed and that's why I didn't want him to do this. Pepper was just as concerned because once they left us I had told her what happened and what was going on. It broke her heart almost as bad as it did mine to see him this way and now that she knew why he wanted to kill himself, she took it upon herself to comfort him. Taking him into a deep hug and as I looked at the doctor, Pepper whispered.
"Everything is going to be okay. I promise you it will. Okay?"
Raptor struggled to speak as the doctor looked at him to say.
"I need to get back to work. It was a pleasure meeting you Commander. Please stay safe and keep in touch if you need help."
Pulling off my sister who was shedding tears of her own, Raptor replied.
"Thank you again. I'll try my best."
Taking my chance to step in, I gently turned him backwards towards the entrance while whispering into his side.
"Let's go."
Raptor didn't fight me as we got back outside. On the way to the car I asked my broken boyfriend.
"Where do you want to go now? We need to switch our pace."
Opening his door, he replied while getting down and into the driver's seat.
"I want to go to the capital for a few minutes. Then…...then we can do whatever."
"Okay." I mumbled under my breath as we got back on the road.
The drive over was a silent one. Pepper and I had no idea what to say to even change the subject. Raptor was driving and I was sitting up front watching his face carefully as he drove. My heart was sinking as I caught a few tears dripping off his chin. He was in so much pain it broke my heart in two. Unable to truly help him made it even worse, but I looked back when I suddenly felt my sister's hand bump by arm from the backseat.
In her hand was a small rag she must have had in her vest. Giving me a nod to take it, I did and proceeded to lean in towards the hedgehog. Touching just under his right eye, I whispered.
"Let me."
The moment I began to wipe was when he truly began to cry out in pain. I held him together as best as I could the rest of the trip over. When we pulled into the courtyard Raptor had taken a few deep breaths and prepared himself to speak. Looking over to me he whimpered.
"I just want to give this to Marx. I can't have this in my house. I just can't Zeta."
He was going to make me cry at this rate. My sister was already halfway there and all I could do was tell him back faithfully.
"I know baby, but it's okay. We're here for you. Hey?"
Using all I had, I reached over to hug him tightly. He was shaking in my arms the whole time. Pepper managed to get out of the car and with ease she opened his door and urged him.
"Come on. Let's go inside."
Raptor nodded and proceeded to get out after I gave him a kiss. I then followed as he was soon the one leading the way inside the main building. People were clearly aware that something was wrong the moment they saw his face. I could barely handle this moment as medical was hopefully the final stop. As we entered, Raptor had gotten a nurse's attention and managed to ask her.
"Where's Marx? Is he able to see me for a moment?"
Nodding she replied.
"He's in his office. Go right on through Commander."
Raptor thanked her and we followed. When we reached the office she mentioned, Raptor knocked and waited with the folder in his right hand. When Marx opened the door he widened his eyes to see us all standing there. Yet his attention went right to Raptor who was still silently letting out some tears. With a sense of serious concern coming to mind, Marx asked him.
"What's going on Raptor?"
Handing him the folder, Marx looked at it's cover as he told him.
"I need you to hold onto this for me Marx."
"What is it?" He wondered as he opened it up. I had no idea what was in there, but I knew what it meant. With Marx looking through the first paper; Raptor decided to turn and began to walk away from the cat. Looking at my sister, I ordered her calmly.
"Go with him please."
She quickly ran for him leaving me to look at Marx as he must have seen what the documents inside that folder held. With two wide eyes and shock setting in, he questioned.
"What? This can't be….? Archer? Ahhh….?" His eyes shot back up to me and all I could do was nod my head once slowly.
This cat was absolutely shattered now and without even thinking about it; he handed me the folder and ran after my sister.
"Marx!" I shouted as Raptor hadn't even gotten halfway down the hall yet.
With Pepper just reaching his side, she widened her eyes and took a step back as the cat came right in to stop him in his tracks. I didn't hear any exchange of words after, I just watched from where I was standing as he took Raptor into his body with a deep and powerful hug.
Raptor broke back down and with my eyes going to the folder, I read the papers for myself. I was disgusted with seeing the truth and quickly had to look away. When I did I saw Raptor sitting on the floor and Marx still holding on like he was his own son. The cat was even crying now which gave me even more reason to believe in their friendship. Hopefully Pepper felt that as well considering she never really trusted him.
Wiping my eyes with the sleeve of my cloak, I tried to plan the next move now that this was done. Hopefully I could bring this day back around.
An hour later.
I told Marx what happened last night and it came with Clamer not shortly after. They wanted to talk to Raptor in private and thankfully this time I was allowed to be present for the conversation. We sat in Marx's office with Raptor now exhausted from all his crying. He was a broken man right now and all I could do was comfort him as Clamer was reading over the folder for the fifth time to be sure it was true. Marx was sitting right next to us and the same as me; we were just rubbing Raptor's back in the hope that it was helping something.
After a few minutes, Raptor mumbled to us.
"I just don't know what to do anymore. My whole life I trusted her. I should have known something was wrong. I should have…..?"
He stopped himself from going on any further with that sentence. With Marx leaning in to level with Raptor's head, he told him bluntly.
"This isn't your fault. Alicia lied to you. She lied to all of us. She crossed a line by not trusting you, but Raptor I know the man you are. You loved Ghost. You truly loved that boy and nothing will ever change the fact that you were his father till the very end. Genetics don't determine how you felt. And I know if Alicia would have come clean, you would have tried everything to make it work. You loved her and she loved you."
"She told me that he was my fucking son. For thirteen years I believed that. I trusted everyone. Archer, Frost, all of them. I worked my ass off to start over and try again, but for some reason Archer went behind my back and fucked my whore of a wife! He fucked her and knocked her up. I wonder if he even knew? Did he even know Ghost was his? How could I have known? He had my quills. He had my eyes. He even had my personality."
The three of us were silent as he went on to ask.
"What have I done with my life? Why do I keep getting fucked?! What the hell did I do to deserve it!?"
"Nothing." I told him as Clamer finally stepped in to say.
"I don't want you doing anymore then you already have Raptor."
Raptor took his time to look up at the man as he went on to say to him.
"For now I don't want you to be caught in the middle of any politics. No more military. No meetings. You're taking some time off."
"I can't just stop." Raptor tried to tell him back as Clamer retorted.
"Yes you can. You need to. Everyone in this room is here because we care about you and your health Raptor. You've been stretched to your wits end thanks to all this madness and look at what happened because of it. You almost died. Mental pain is far worse than anything physical. You would have died if it wasn't for her." Raptor was barely able to argue. He lowered his head knowing what he did and gave me a small glance. I just nodded my head as Clamer bluntly ordered.
"You're done. No more leading. No more military. You've done enough. It's time to hang up your coat."
"But the country…?"
"The country is getting better, Raptor." Marx cut him off, which got his attention shifted away from Clamer.
"Everyone is coming together and because of what you've done we will continue to grow. There are leaders out there besides you. I agree with Clamer. You can't be put back into a stressful situation. Especially one as big as this. For your safety Raptor, I beg of you. Listen to us. You've done all you can and things are right where they need to be now thanks to you and thanks to all the people who sacrificed their lives for this slim chance at freedom. Please…..think about shifting gears now that you're here. Zeta wants a family. A family with you and she is more than capable of providing all the things Alicia and Julie couldn't. She loves you. I love you. Clamer loves you. The whole fucking world loves you. It's time to stop. You deserve to be happy and that happiness starts by settling down."
"Please." I begged him as Clamer and Marx had said it perfectly. Marx was still shedding tears, but kept himself together as I leaned in to touch the right side of my head to his left. Keeping my voice soft and quiet, I whispered to him.
"We can be happy. We can make things right. I want this, but it means nothing if you stay on this course. I need you. I don't need a president. I don't need a military commander. I don't even need a protector. I just need you. Just you Raptor. Just you."
Raptor was still at a loss for what to do or say. Even as I held him.
In the seconds that followed, he broke again and began to cry into my chest. So pulling him in close for a tight hug, I rubbed his back and told him.
"It's all going to be okay. I promise."
Clamer and Marx were both looking at me now as I had a tear running down the left side of my face. Marx just smiled because he knew I was doing the right thing by embracing this moment, but I was just trying to keep him alive. He needed someone to hold him like this. He needed it for years. Probably his whole life.
Keeping him clutched, I mumbled through my own sadness.
"I don't care how long it takes. All I ask is that you make the right choice. Please Raptor. I love you."
With my mind at a standstill, I just closed my eyes and focused on the moment. Begging god that this would work out.
Raptor's POV, Two weeks later.
It's been two weeks since I've done anything. Everyday has been the same. Zeta stays at my side to make sure I don't do anything stupid. Clamer comes to the house at night to talk with me about my day probably to make sure my mind is on track somewhere decent. And Marx is just trying his best to help me through it all. I haven't had much time to relax and just enjoy myself. That's why I knew I had to make my own move for once.
I walked the neighborhood for a good thirty minutes. I just wanted to get some air and enjoy the peace. Yet it was around that time where I could go for a drink. Ron's wasn't far so that's where I went.
When I got there I found the bar had maybe ten people sitting in it. Ron was behind the counter as usual and the second he saw me enter his smile came on and out he came from behind the said counter.
The bear then opened his arms as he came within feet. And just smiling for myself, I accepted the offer and gave him a small hug. At which point he said to me.
"So good to see you Raptor. How have you been getting along?"
He proceeded to then escort me to a booth. As I sat down I replied.
"It's been okay. Just a lot of personal issues going on. Nothing I can't handle."
"How's Zeta?" He then asked as I calmly stated.
"She's good. Well she might be good. I'm not supposed to leave her sight. So give or take a few minutes and she'll probably be knocking down the door."
Giving me a face that read sarcasm was coming, I listened as Ron laughed.
"Well considering you have a track record of fucking up my bar, I might just take you seriously and leave it open. I can't afford any more damages. Insurance only covers bullet holes and broken bottles for so long."
He got me to chuckle with that which meant the world to me. I needed to laugh a bit.
During my laughter, Ron managed to snag two beers from behind the counter. By the time he came back, he offered me one and took the seat opposite of me in the booth. As he took a sip of his he asked me.
"So how are things going with the election? Is that official?"
Taking a swig of my drink, I replied shortly after clearing my throat.
"Yeah it's official."
"A fucking president here in the middle east? That's pretty goddamn crazy Raptor."
Nodding my head I replied.
"It is."
Sensing that I was indifferent about the situation, he wondered.
"Are you running?"
I had to think about the question. I wasn't sure myself. Looking back at him I said.
"I don't know. Everyone wants me too, but at the same time Ron; Zeta, my doctors, and my friends are begging me not to."
"Well what do you want?" He asked me as I calmly collected myself before replying.
"I still don't know."
"Well you love this girl right? Zeta I mean?"
"Yeah." I replied as he went on to wonder.
"Do you want a family with her?"
Locking eyes with the bear, he quickly reassured me.
"Now is the perfect time Raptor."
"I don't know about that." I replied as he went on to say.
"Well think of it this way then. Don't run for office. Instead just settle down and focus on her and the potential of starting over. Because let's be real Rap. You don't have to be a rocket scientist to know the outcome of the first middle eastern election. Hands down if you were to toss your hat into the ring you'd without a doubt win. There isn't anyone other than you that I hear people talking about when it comes to this point in our history."
I lowered my head just to breathe now as Ron continued after taking another large gulp of his drink.
"Or don't. You could just focus on being happy for once in your life. Even if you decided not to have anymore kids, at least you and Zeta could be happy together."
It was at that moment that I felt the bear reach out to tap my arm. Looking back up into his smiling grin, I listened close as he asked me.
"You wanna hear some personal advice though from an old bear with three kids of his own?"
Nodding my head, I watched as Ron sat up close to whisper.
"I don't want you to follow in your father's footsteps. If you decide to have kids with this woman, you damn well better make sure you're there for them. Not just at birth. Every step of the way. Every step."
Looking this man right in the eyes, I asked him in awe of his bravery.
"Ron? Do you have any idea how big your balls are? Because I promise you right now, that no one else would have just said that to me."
Giving me a small chuckle he replied.
"I've always been the one to tell people the truth. And Raptor? Even if you do become president, you're still gonna be a part of my family. I want you to know that."
Deep down I could feel the burn of his love in my heart. That's why I loved this man. He was everything I aspired to be in my old age. Sitting back and clinking my bottle with his, Ron smiled widely and urged me with a happy hue to his voice.
"Don't stress about it. Just go home to that girl and figure out what matters to you most now that you're free."
The fucker was right. He watched as I slowly got up from the booth and with the bottle still in my hand he shouted out.
"And keep smiling you stupid fuck! You're a goddamn war hero! An icon to everyone! No more sulking! Now get out of here and go do what you do best! We'll all still be here by the time you're done! Right!?"
Thanks to Ron's big voice, he had everyone in the bar ordering the same thing of me. Shaking my head out of embarrassment, I proceeded to walk towards the exit. Before I could leave however, I put my hand on the bear's shoulder to say back.
"Thanks Ron. I'll see you later."
"It's always been my pleasure! But hey, wait a second!"
Stopping by the door to look back at the man, I waited as he got up from the booth to quickly reapproach me. Leaning down into my ear, he whispered.
"If you go home and you decide to try for a little hedgehog or a wolf. I better be the first one you tell when the miracle comes."
Giving him a faint laugh I replied.
"Ron, with the way things are between us, I wouldn't be surprised when I ask you to be my best man."
With a red face and his cheer coming back ten fold, Ron shouted out while hugging me close.
"Damn right I won't be surprised! Now get your ass out of here Commander!"
Letting me pull off, Ron backhanded my chest and held the door as I went back out into the night. Looking at the beer in my hand as I took those first few steps, I finished off the bottle and tossed it with an underhand into a nearby ally that was on my left. When I heard the glass break, I picked up my pace and began my trip home.
mT Shadow.