Author's note: Hi again guys and Happy New Year! Sorry for not updating sooner, turns out with my car breaking down twice, work, Christmas and New Years I haven't had as much time to write as planned. But I'm back!
Thank you for being patient, hope you enjoy this update and that you all had an amazing holiday season.
Considering it's been a minute since I uploaded, if you could please post a review with your thoughts/letting me know you're still interested in the story that'd be amazing! Thank you as always!
Ana practically knocked the door down to EZ's house once she finally got there, the anger from her conversation with Mark finally starting to somewhat settle. But she was far from thinking clearly.
The entire way over she'd been replaying the conversation in her mind with a million different thoughts fighting for control. Does Felipe know? How has EZ been handling it? How will she keep this from Angel? What the hell would Angel do if he ever found out?
But above everything, her biggest concern right now? Making sure EZ was okay. She knew how sensitive her best friend was, and above all else knew he would only ever want to protect the ones he loves. She could only imagine how hard it's been for him having to keep this secret, and having to go against Angel.
Ana was so lost in her thoughts it took her a moment to realise EZ had opened the door, and was staring back at her looking completely confused.
Noticing her erratic behaviour immediately, EZ went into protective mode.
"Ana? What's the matter? You alright?" He asked, grabbing both her arms as he searched her face for an answer.
Now that she was in his presence, Ana found herself being able to somewhat settle her nerves. She was with EZ now and she could get to the bottom of whatever was going on.
"Yeah… yeah, I'm… is there somewhere we can talk EZ?" Ana finally said, not wanting to stay out in the open as she tried to wipe the tears from her eyes.
"Yeah of course, come inside. Dad's at the shop so we're alone," he answered, pulling her into the hallway and closing the door behind her. Looking up at him, Ana found herself dropping fresh tears as she saw EZ in his prospect cut.
"You were… you were with the club earlier?" She asked hesitantly, not knowing how she was going to break to him everything that just happened.
Confused, EZ looked down at his chest before looking back at her. "Yeah… had a meeting and then just had to do some random shit with Angel… Ana? What's the matter? You're starting to scare me."
"A lot of things! A lot of things are fucking the matter EZ and I just don't know where to start!" Ana confessed, now completely sobbing, she couldn't control herself any longer.
Pulling her into a hug, EZ rested his head on top of hers as he tried calming her down, running his hand down her back. "Ana, breathe okay? I'm sure whatever it is we can deal with it, you just gotta tell me what's happened…." He said, pulling slightly away from her so that she was looking up at him.
"Mark and I broke up," Anna blurted out, not knowing how to actually bring up the bigger issue, the fact he was a rat, the fact that her now ex-boyfriend made him a rat. Part of her hope EZ would be able to put the two together from how she was acting. She didn't want to have to say it herself, she was afraid even though she understood why he chose to become an informant, that no matter how she said it, it'd just sound like she was judging him.
Scrunching his face up in confusion, EZ didn't know what to think. As far as he knew Mark and Ana were solid. Sure, they were disagreeing about the move, but he didn't think they were on the verge of breaking up. Did Angel have something to do with this?
But then, after looking into Ana's eye for a moment longer and seeing her searching for an answer from him, a sinking feeling grew in the pit of his stomach. It seemed like Ana's hopes he would piece things together came true.
But EZ didn't want to have to admit it. Aside from Angel, Ana was the last person he wanted to find out about this. Much like for Angel, Ana was EZ's centre, the person he confided in the most and the one who would always make him see reason. This also mean that in times where he was battling with himself, or knew he was doing something wrong that she wouldn't shy away from telling him so. The woman had no fear or issues in telling it like it is, she'd even let you hate her for it. It was one of the things he loved most about her.
With the silence now having gone on way too long, Ana felt she had to break it. Moving out of EZ's hold, Ana moved over to the couch to sit down. Her nerves now coming back up, her legs were bouncing up and down as she clasped her hands together to stop them from visibly shaking.
"I guess it's no secret that him and I have been disagreeing about moving to DC… which you of course knew. But there was something that I wasn't telling you," she said, now looking up at him, biting her nails.
"Oh?" EZ asked, his head quirking to the right as he moved to sit next to Ana. Maybe she doesn't know, he thought.
Taking a deep breath, Ana decided to finally admit to her feelings for Angel to EZ. Recently, she figured not admitting it to him would make it as if they weren't real, as if she could deny them a little longer, just long enough for them to go down on their own. But the reality was she wanted Angel more than she ever wanted anyone or anything and while it's taken her some time to realise, now that she has things from her past has started to add up. Like why she was always much harder on him than EZ, why she was always jealous of any girl he looked at, why it took her so long to introduce him to Mark and why she never wanted to tell him about the move. It was always Angel, she was just in a very severe state of denial.
Now that she was aware of her own feelings for Angel, and his for her, knowing what she knew about EZ left her in a very comprising position. Because while she would never betray EZ's trust, she just didn't know if that meant she could ever start something with Angel knowing what she knew.
"So… you know ever since you got out, I've been spending more time with Angel too. I don't know when you were inside EZ we drifted, I guess. I don't know we were still there for each other but it got hard to be around each other, especially once Mark and I got serious and we just… anyways the point is," Ana paused, taking a deep breath before being cut off by EZ.
"The point is you and Angel have feelings for each other?" EZ said, so easily and as if he had known this for years. Turning her head swiftly to look at him, she was met with a sly smile and for a second, she felt a weight lifted off her shoulders, and a chuckle reluctantly escaped her lips.
"That obvious huh?" She asked, taking a moment to just be a girl talking to her best friend about the guy she liked because she knew it would only last a moment. "Yeah well having grown up with you two, kinda figured it was bound to happen at some point," EZ admitted, wiping a stray tear from Ana's cheek as he did so.
"But I know you also really loved Mark, he did a lot for you, he was there for everything. I know you have to feel awful for ending it… I'm assuming he didn't take it too well?" EZ asked, bracing himself for her answer. If he knew Mark even just a little, he wouldn't be surprised if he told her about the deal to hurt her, or threaten her into staying somehow.
Getting up from the sofa now, Ana found herself pacing back and forth. She couldn't avoid the topic any longer, it was time to just confront EZ head on. She knew they were both dancing around it.
"Yeah uh, you could say that… he um… he told me EZ. About the deal?" She practically blurted out, turning around the face EZ.
Even though he knew it was coming it still hit him like a ton of bricks, hearing Ana say it. He had no idea what this meant for their friendship, for her relationship with Angel, for his standing with the club.
Standing up himself now, EZ walked over to Ana slowly. "Ana, you gotta understand okay? I had no choice okay? I got out from practically a death sentence okay that is what my deal was. Sure I could've got out when I was 40 but what good would that be that? My life would've been over by then. But now… now I have another shot and I know that it's fucking complicated and that if Angel ever found out that he'd fucking kill me but I just…. I had no other option. I am so sorry that you found out that way, that you found out at all! But I am begging you, you can't say anything." EZ explained, by the time he finished talking he was right in front of Ana, holding his hands in hers and pleading with her.
While he knew he could trust her and that she'd never intentionally hurt him, this was no ordinary situation. It was hard enough convincing his dad to keep it a secret, Ana was a whole other ballgame especially now that she was on the verge of starting something up with Angel. Which brother's side would she choose?
Her gaze softening, Ana found her tears building again and she had to pull EZ into a hug to stop him from seeing her cry. Speaking into his chest, she held on to him tight and he her.
"Of course, I will keep it a secret EZ… I would never betray you, I just… I just needed to hear it from you and I – "She paused, pulling her head back to look up at him, her hands now on either side of his face. "I understand why you took the deal, hell I probably would've done the same fucking thing. I just, am so sorry that my stupid ex is the one who manipulated you into this. I feel like it's my fault," she admitted.
"What? Fuck no… Ana, I am a grown ass man. I knew what I was getting into. Even if it wasn't Mark who offered me the deal, I would've taken it. I was dying in there, I needed out," EZ said, pulling Ana into another tight hug as she quietly sobbed.
While he didn't say it right away, EZ was grateful Ana understood his choice, but he was afraid she wasn't really aware of just how hard it would be to keep this from his brother.
Having now separated and sat back on the couch, EZ's hands in hers, he asked her, "Ana I gotta know, are you gonna be able to keep this from Angel? Because he can't find out… if he ever did… I just – "
"I know EZ. I know. And no, I won't say anything, it would do him no good to know. But EZ how long is this gonna go for? What for the rest of your life? What is the endgame?" Ana asked.
"It's just until I help them take down Galindo and then I'm out." EZ said abruptly.
"Out?" Ana asked, confused.
Pausing before answering, EZ knew sharing the rest of his plan would be just as hard for Ana to hear. "Out of it all, the deal, the club, Santo Padre. I'm just gonna leave, start new. I can't stay here forever. Between mom's murder and this whole thing, I just can't stay here anymore. I need a fresh start."
Now Ana found herself replacing her sadness and confusion with another emotion: anger. "So, so what? You're just gonna leave? Abandon the club, Angel, your dad… me?" She asked, moving her hands away before continuing.
"We just got you back Ezekiel. You can't just abandon us…" she said, her voice quivering.
With tears forming in his eyes now, EZ grabbed Ana's hands and brought them back into his lap. He knew that once he told her his plan to eventually leave that she'd beg him to stay. But he needed a fresh start.
"Ana hey, I would never abandon you. You're my best friend, my girl, the pain in the butt sister I never had," he joked, earning a rolling of eyes and chuckle from the woman sitting next to him. "I'll still be around whenever you need me just. I need to see more than what I have and I don't want to be in the MC forever. It isn't me."
Taking a deep breath, Anna squeezed EZ's hands. "Yeah… I know, I just. I don't like the idea of you leaving me," she admitted, letting her best friend see a rare moment of weakness. Ana liked to keep her cards pretty close to her chest.
"Well hey, at least you'll have Angel now?" EZ joked, giving Ana a slight nudge. Now that the hard part of the conversation was done, he wanted to figure out what in the hell was going on with his best friend and his brother. Shit, I'm gonna have to make sure Angel doesn't fuck this up, he thought.
"Well honestly, nothing. I can't start anything up with Angel knowing what I know. It's gonna be hard enough keeping this from him now, if I started something up with him? I couldn't do it EZ…." Ana admitted, not wanting to make him feel bad but also not being able to lie.
Unfortunately, EZ was immediately hit with a wave of guilt. He knew how much Angel loved Ana. She was the only girl who ever had his attention, the man would die and kill for her. And for Ana? While she's only just realising it, EZ always knew she looked up to Angel in a way she never did with anyone else, they always had the potential for something more they just never got the timing right. And of course, now that they have, he had to fuck it up he thought.
"Fuck Ana please, don't do this on account of me alright? You deserve to be happy, so does Angel. Don't waste another second not being with him!" He tried to reason, but he knew it was a lost cause and he understood why.
"EZ come on? Seriously? You know I'm right… I can't just start something and keep a bomb like this from him. Could you imagine if he ever found out? Does Felipe know too?" Ana asked, only just now thinking of the Reyes father.
"Yeah pops knows…" EZ admitted.
"Right, so could you imagine if somehow Angel found out, it would be his brother keeping a secret from him and his girlfriend and dad knowing too. He'd never forgive any of us. At least, at least it'd be a little bit less of a sting if we weren't together," Ana reasoned.
Realising she was right, EZ decided there was no point arguing. So he moved on to his next question. "So what are you gonna tell him? About you and Mark. You know he's gonna think it means you wanna be with him?"
"Well I mean he wouldn't be wrong. But I'll just, tell him I'm not ready for a relationship, and that his friendship is too important to risk. He'll be mad but… he'll accept it, eventually."
Giving her a small smile, EZ wasn't so sure but he didn't want to worry Ana any more than he already had. So instead, the two best friends just sat together in silence for a while, trying to process this new information and figure out what that meant for them and their friendship.
Author's note:
And that's chapter 11 guys! Thanks again so very much for being patient with me, I know I was meant to upload a lot sooner and I am so sorry. Life just gets busy sometimes I guess! Aha.
As mentioned before, if you could please review and let me know that you're still interested in the story/your thoughts on this chapter and what you want to see IT WOULD HELP ME GREATLY in updating sooner and more frequently.
Thanks guys :)