Chapter 12: Unspoken Words

Closing the door behind her and settling down in a chair in her quarters, she opened the beer fridge, indulging herself in the strong and fiery taste of the whiskey. She had taken her helmet and placed it on the desk beside her, kicking her feet up and slouching in the armrest.

A few minutes later, she was disturbed by someone knocking her door, the voice of Obi Wan speaking from behind the door. "May I come in?". She sighed and settled down her whiskey bottle, calling her helmet to her with the force, pulling it back over her face.

When she was done, she called "Come in..", her voice very devoid of emotions. The door opened swiftly, with the jedi master stepping in hesitantly. Pax acknowledged his discomfort, rising from her seat to sit on the edge of her bed, gesturing for him to sit in the seat she was just in.

"What can I help you with Master Jedi?" she enquired anonymously, being careful not to refer to him as Master Kenobi, or Obi-Wan.

The man settled himself in the chair, looking scanning her helmet, and noting the opened beer bottle that sat beside her. He opened his mouth and seized the opportunity to deadpan to the bounty hunter before him,"You are aware that you will miss your mouth with you helmet on?", but instantly regretted it, given that she seemed a little uncomfortable by his presence, based on how her muscles had stiffened and tensed. "Oh yes, I am very much aware of that, jedi", the final word rolling off her tongue in a moment of unrestrained venom. Immediately biting her tongue at her lack of control, she straightened up, "Sorry, master jedi, forgive me, its been a rough week.." In truth, she wasn't lying, the trauma of the trial left her as a lonely insomniac, sleepless nights were now the norm.

He started his 'passive interrogation' with a bit of politeness, to clear up the tense atmosphere engulfing the room, all trying to clear the akward silence that filled the air from her little aggression, "please.. call me Obi-Wan" adding a friendly smile, before pressing on with his main point "I am just..." he hesitated "curious.. as to how you seem to have such an adept knowledge of the force. May I ask, who taught you to do that?"

She could see him subtly begin to probe for information, so she decided she would play his little game "My older brother... why?". In the force her words spoke true, for it was.. from a certain point of view.

The jedi master took the bait.

"Oh.." he stammered.

"Not the answer you were expecting..?" she sceptically answered, raising an eye marking under her helmet.

"Forgive me if this seems a bit forward or demanding.. but who exactly is your brother..? I haven't exactly heard another person going around with the name Pax.." he pointed out.

For a second she paused, trying to come up with a convincing lie (or rather, half truth), "He didn't go by the name of Pax, he was my adopted brother, so to speak..." trailing off, her voice sounded slightly pained, he had obviously hit a nerve.

The room sat in silence for a while, the jedi picking up on the hint of sadness in her voice, so she decided to try and change the subject, trying to shift the jedi masters attention away from her identity, she couldn't have him getting suspicious whilst he spent time on her ship. "Enough about me, Obi-Wan, you are supposed to be healing. You need rest."

"Nonsense" he croaked, his stubbornness coming into role, he added "If it weren't for your jedi-like knowledge of the force, I fear I may not be talking to you right now."

Under her helmet, her skin darkened a little, after recieving such a praise from jedi master, but she quickly brushed it off, "Don't get me wrong Obi-Wan, I am no jedi", she could feel some anger slip from beneath her facade. The jedi raised his eyebrows in surprise, he could feel a dangerous anger buried deep within this bounty hunter.

As a jedi, he was taught to be compassionate, so maybe he should try to comfort this person, making her a bit more comfortable on her own ship "I am sorry if I angered you.. I mean you no ha-"

"-I know" she quickly interjected, "No jedi ever does... most of the time." she started to trail off, her voice getting lighter by the word in that sentance.

"It is not the jedi way to purposefully endanger others, each life is valuable to us" he reassured her, but even then he felt a little unsure of his words, recalling the injustice of the council at Padawan Tano's trial.

'If only the council abided to their own kriffing rules' she thought bitterly to herself at his statement, clearly the council didn't trust her, so why should she trust anyone anymore?

Her facade was dropping fast now, "The Jedi Council doesn't care about anything else then to preserve the public's image of the order. You should know this, Obi-Wan. They will eventually throw you under the bus. They don't abide to their own rules." Ahsoka declared, shaking her head and bitting her lip.

"But we do abide to our rules. We always preserve life and try to help the innocent." Obi-Wan reasoned, nearly enough to make the Togruta burst out laughing. The Togruta wasn't enjoying this conversation about what they did to her.

"Oh, but what about Ahsoka Tano's trial? You cannot deny the fact that they had failed. You all threw her under the bus? What if she was executed?" She was beginning to get irritated and more enraged.

Obi-Wan was speechless for once in his life and wondered what would have happened if Tano was guilty. Like Plo Koon, Obi-Wan protested in handing her to the Republic. Likely, the Jedi Council would say it was just the will of the Force. Anakin hadn't been the same since she departed from the Temple and now has darker outbursts and a clear temper against Master Windu, Mundi, and Yoda.

"Then there's the fact about Tarkin. Why wasn't he placed under arrest for what he had done to Tano? He send false accusations in her way and claim that she's guilty, wanting to press for the death sentence. You know, I wouldn't be surprised if Tarkin sabotaged the evidence and tried to prove her guilty. What about the whole No AuDiO melarky?! Honestly, you jedi are a bit stupid at times, do you even know what a kriffing chokehold is?! Oh YeAh It LoOkS lIkE SoMeOne ScReAmInG tO gEt A mEdIc maybe it will do better to the world if your little cult decided to do lip reading classes, maybe they would understand the difference between the innocent and guilty!" By now, her voice was rising, borderline infuriated and frustrated, showing that she was not happy with the choices of the Council.

"Tarkin had received a reprimand by the Chancellor and Jedi Council," Obi-Wan replied, not wanting to accept the fact that she was right.

She knew that Anakin wanted nothing but to get justice which is why Tarkin was found beaten up by someone one day later. Although the Jedi Council knew that Anakin had been guilty of assaulting Tarkin, none wanted to make him more frustrated because the last thing anyone wants is a Jedi Knight making an outburst and eventually leaving the Order.

"Reprimanded? Why not arrested? He was overly aggressive, tried to execute a 16-year-old. No, Tarkin deserves more then a reprimand. He should be arrested and investigated for his role." she put her hand on her helmet, rubbing circles on her temples. "Ugh!" she groaned "and this... is why I drink, the world is too ignorant to admit their own mistakes and failure, what is even the point in choosing allegiances when the people your taking a bullet for is standing behind the trigger.."

The Togruta had just outlined quite a few major flaws in the order and for a second, he had just sat there, silently absorbing the criticism, before he found his own voice picking up again, "in case you haven't noticed, Pax, there is a war going on" his voice began to rise "and whilst you are at home, drinking and wallowing in your own self pity, we are RISKING OUR LIVES on the front lines, just so the people can keep their freedom. We are keepers of the peace and not soldiers."

The togruta leaned forward to place her whiskey on a side table, then started laughing hysterically, slowly clapping her hands as if he just told the galaxy's worst joke as if someone had just claimed the chancellor was a sith lord. "What's so funny?!" he inquisitively asked, raising a sharp eyebrow.

"Your more of an idealist than I thought" she said quietly, almost as if she was speaking to herself, before adding "Everything you just said in that sentence was WRONG, you want to know why I became a bounty hunter?" she questioned, starting to test the man's patience, but before he could reply, she continued to add more layers of criticism into her arguement, "You claim I laze about all day, but i spend every kriffing hour of my day arresting criminals and destroying entire cells of crime syndicates. So don't you DARE start saying I do nothing! I am simply filling in for what the jedi should actually be doing, so don't even start with deflecting the blame onto the war. You never even did those things before the war! Instead you people negotiated politics on Coruscant's surface whilst the underworld screamed and begged for your help. Of which they received none. Don't even get me started on being peacekeepers! You fight as Generals and Commanders in an ARMY in a WAR"

"-In the name of peace!" he interrupted, trying to reason with the angry Togruta, who was having none of it. Instead, she just burst into further laughter, unable to contain herself. "In the name of peace? You know how ridiculous you sound? Real peacekeepers actually KEEP the PEACE by preventing wars last time I checked." she sighed "Some peacekeepers you are.."

The mighty negotiator, famous for swaying arguments and battles in his favour was losing very badly in his own defence of the jedi, because this arguement had put to light the flaws of the jedi, and now he was beginning to question them himself. Where they the really just as bad as the sith? Manipulated to serve a higher power? His patience, however, was definitely being tested. In one final attempt to win the arguement, he threatened, his voice a low growl "I'd be careful if I were you, Pax, you have no idea what its like to be a jedi, and the responsibility it holds!"

"I have no idea..." she started slowly, repeating the words, "I have no idea? I have no idea?! Obi Wan, I once had a path that had been chosen for me since I was orphaned on my homeworld! I had once been someone, a soldier, but the republic betrayed me without battling an eyelash!" Ahsoka roared, tearing off her helmet and throwing it to her bunk. As if the wind had just been knocked out of him, he let out a small gasp, he had suspected it was her, but dismissed it given the behaviour of this person being very different to Ahsoka, but here she was, standing before him, fists clentched and her face was twisted in anger, could have sworn he saw a thin line of gold rim her eyes.

"Ahsoka..." he started, his tone half surprised, half disappointed, a huge wave of guilt hit his conscience he never known that someone he knew could change so much within a week, the Ahsoka before him was so different to the innocent, cheery jedi padawan that he was used to, this person was like a completely different person, not even a ghost of her former self. This Ahsoka was a mercenary, beaten and broken down by the world around her until all that remained and emerged from her soul was a hunter fighting for survival. Her eyes looked dull, distant and predatory, heck, even her skin looked a few tones darker!

She picked herself up towards the table, downing a huge glug of whiskey which would surely give her a headache later. He silently watched her, he also just realised that she was an underage drinker. She leaned against the wall, ignoring him, with her forehead pressed against the cold metal. He also noticed that she was breathing lightly, probably trying to calm herself down.

"Ahsoka..?" he questioned, he was surprised how soft it sounded as he continued to watch her in awe. He noticed her visibly flinch, as if the name was a demon trying to attack her. She turned to look him in the eye, "I don't go by that name anymore, I can't, all it does is create enemies and multiply my issues." her voice sounded crushed, strangled, even. Obi wan felt guilt swarming him as he thought to himself, I have done this, We, have done this to her. A second later, she straightened up, muscles tensing hiding all vulnerability from herself once again, becoming professional once more. Her voice came out very bitter, practically predatory low growl "Don't even think about telling the council about this Kenobi", she brought her hand to her chin, stroking it just like he normally does, contemplating something.

Her voice dripping with venom as she spoke again, "We all have secrets, personally, second chances are always good, so i will ask this and only once." She started pacing towards him slowly, "You have already broken the Jedi code by acting on your feelings with Satine, admitting your attachment." she opened the cabinet to reveal the darksaber "I think it is good to have someone to trust you, one that you know has genuinely got your back, so in order to keep yourself in the order, do two things - also" she paused.

"Are you blackmailing me?" Obi Wan questioned harshly, but before he could further protest, she interrupted him, narrowing her eyes dangerously "-you owe me. Big time."

She ran her fingers over the hilt, then pressed it into his palm. "Next time, I don't want to come running halfway across the galaxy against impossible odds, so you will teach her how to defend herself with it - she seems to be a particular target for the Sith."

Ahsoka walked to her cot, laying back on the sheets "Secondly, in your report to the council, if you mention me, just call me Pax or bounty hunter - oh - and I'm keeping Savage's saber with or without your permission."

He rose out of the chair, sighing in defeat, in reality, he knew that he was gambling with his career as a jedi, so he had to keep his word, or risk losing it all. He turned to the door, but he froze when he heard her say one last thing, "To be honest, I think you should relax and take some time off the war with the duchess, someone like her would be enough to keep you from going insane if your whole world falls apart." obviously, he knew what she was referring to and he took a second to actually think about that.

What would he do if one day the council abandoned him? What would he do if inside one day his friends view him as a traitor for something he didn't do, just to find out that one of his friends actually framed him. The thought of someone like Quinlan Vos framing him, someone he trusts with his life, it felt like a knife to the back.

He quietly scolds himself for beginning to doubt the Jedi order like this, perhaps a little meditation will do him some good.

Ahsoka's holodisk bleeped on, she looked at the caller ID and noticed it was Onyx, What does he want? she thought to herself, slightly annoyed that he disrupted the small chance of her actually getting any sleep on the trip back to Coruscant.

She accepted the call, and he flashed up on the screen

"Hey kid" he croaked, "Heard of your success on Mandalore" he smiled slightly, the kind of smile a mentor gives their student when they do something impressive, in a way, he was kind of - if fond was the word - fond of her and he had - in a way - taken her under his wing so far, he wasn't necessarily the most likeable of people, but he certainly gave credit where credits due. "I'm takin' a break for the meanwhile, an' if you wanna join me, I'm goin' Canto Bight, heard they got some good casino's there, good arms dealing supply too, great stock of weapons. Rumor has it they are selling powerful Seperatist grade weapons, im keepin' my eyes peeled for large mag size and fast fire rate"

Perdita smirks at the hologram, fiddling with her thumbs "Good idea, they work pretty effectively... to be honest, i'd be lying if I said I havent been shot several times with one before, thats how I know its good. Especially the snipers"

"Yeah, but they are hella expensive" Onyx remarked, flipping a coin in his hand

nodding her head in agreement, "That they are."

"You coming along then..?" he picked up a pint glass of beer, and lightly sipped it, placing it back in its original place outside the hologram field "maybe we can take a bounty along the way?" he added,

Ahsoka couldn't help herself, she opened her mouth to reply, but instead let out a small yawn, covering her mouth to hide it, when Onyx looked at her strangely, his eyes narrowed, head tilted and waiting for an answer. Trying to temporarily hide her exhaustion, she said "Sure, might do me a lil' good you know?" shooting him a look that said Why you looking so confused?

She lazily rubbed her arms and stared at the ceiling "You know, Onyx, I haven't exactly slept in nearly 3 days, so I'm gonna get a bit of rest, plus I got a new ship if you haven't already noticed." She pinched her nose, trying to rub any collecting sleep out her eyes, "I'm gonna go now, but meet me near Dex's on the surface and ill show you around sometime" she looked back at the holodisk, leaning forward to turn it off, she placed her hand on the 'end call' button "Maybe even take you to Canto Bight myself" she added with a mischievous wink, pressing the button, thus ending the call.

She let off a small sigh. Always on the move...