Chapter 21. Advice.

Sephiroth's POV

I walked absentmindedly in the blistering cold of the night, still very shaken with what had just happened.

I didn't know what on the Planet had gotten into me.

First, it had been the thing with the clothes. I had dressed up specifically for an event taking place outside Shinra HD. I was supposed to be in a ceremony in a military institution for orphans somewhere in Midgar, in order to represent the company.

My body had been there indeed, but my mind had been… absent. And I didn't know why.

I had been up on stage, talking to those little boys, as the adults resumed to soothe my way up. Yes, I knew what they wanted - sponsorship from the company. Of course the matter would have to go through the President and I didn't want to have anything to do with the cause but… Man. Here I was, putting up with this.

And yet, my mind roamed.

I exited the ceremony early, minutes after one a.m. - by foot.

I needed to walk, needed to be hit with cold, wind, the elements. My chest felt strange... oppressed… aching.

Eventually I concluded a walk in the middle of the night would do just fine to my lungs.

The strange aching relieved a little as my steps echoed along the empty streets. The loneliness, the silence there… was blessing.

I didn't mind the hours.

Once I got home, I let darkness prevail. No lights on. I enjoyed the shadow, it was my company - it has always been. So, what was different now?

Nothing, I thought, as my mind posed and answered the questions. My hands reached for the living-room window, whose blinds were down, half-way closed.

My eyes focused through the little holes the blinds designed. Regular and geometrical, those things were a true challenge to my untired eyes.

Yeah, I had been sleeping terribly lately. Intermittent sleep over nothing, I sighed at the thought.

Deep down inside my mind, I wondered if I was getting sick or something.

I stood there for a while, my hands on my pockets and my eyes adjusting to the view - as I let the cozy, warm environment inside my apartment envelop me. It was a comfortable sensation.

However, the nocturnal monotony that surrounded me was, suddenly, shaken by something else entirely.

I narrowed my eyes, trying to grasp what was going on.

And I took my time realizing what it was - or, should I say, who it was.

Up on the Science Division's roof someone lingered. Three… no, four persons, two of them guarding the roof access and the other two… walking around.

The uniform was black, and the ones by the doors were Turk. Their stance was very typical. And the other one standing like a target staring at the sky or something seemed to be dressed like a civilian.

In a second, it all went too obvious in my head.

So Stevens was having a nightly roofwalking.

How reckless!, my mind accused, as my body started to move at once.

I didn't know what moved me in first place. Before I knew it I was walking through a heavy guarded Science division, taking the stairs and making a stop at the level Stevens and her guard would be exiting when the walk was done.

All I knew was I felt annoyed.

That was just… it. Annoyance. Right?

Why couldn't these people do as they were told?

And as the elevator door opened, I couldn't help but to stare… at the two elements standing there. Strife was with her and I felt amazed at how he had let her go to play target up on the roof.

Was he crazy? Irresponsible?

What was he thinking, anyway? And how could a man like him become… important to the Planet, as she had told me, vehemently, the other day?

Could it be the same Cloud Strife?

Right now, it didn't seem that way.

I took her out of the elevator, got her inside the security of the lab area and didn't pay attention to Strife. I just closed the door shut and resumed to stare at the woman in front of me with a frown of…

I sighed at my own thinking.

Hell, what was my problem, what was her thing with me?

The duality I felt inside me didn't help. It was intense and cold, brutal and tender, all of it at the same time.

And I didn't have a name to it, I didn't know how to classify what went through my mind - the same thing that had led me to the place where I stood now, at 3.00 a.m., give or take, in the dark, with her.

What are you doing awake at this time of the night?, she had asked me, a frown of surprise all over her. And also discomfort - it wasn't new that my presence caused her some form of silly distress.

I couldn't help but to wonder why that happened so often.

Her eyes asked me questions, talked to me in a language I couldn't understand. It was foreign, and it innerved me a little. Her mouth said things… but her eyes - oh, her eyes said something absolutely different.

What is that?, my eyes asked her, as she talked to me using that foreign, muted language.

You're not the only one with sleeping problems, Stevens.

I tended to answer her with some kind of unwanted aggressivity, as if in need to compensate what I couldn't see, know or grasp on her.

But then, her mention to pajamas underneath regular clothing made me laugh. Genuinely. What was she thinking? Why ask silly questions… and why did she have to put images of her with her pajamas on, namely those white ones?

Considering that I knew she wore nothing underneath them, if I recalled properly.

The thought itself chastised me and I grew serious immediately. No, this wasn't right. Thoughts of this nature weren't worthy of a man like me, a man of my position.

What was I, some regular, ordinary fellow?

No way.

So, this dysfunctional talk had to end, no matter what.

I led her inside her premises, hoping I could see an end to this episode. Really, how did I get into stuff like this?

But then again, Stevens's reflexes weren't very operational in such late hours and well, she wasn't exactly wide awake. Or so I thought.

She didn't put the lights on and I didn't wonder why. I could see just fine, thing was - she didn't.

And eventually the inevitable happened. Clearly not able to measure distances accurately, Stevens unavertedly hit her head somewhere in my thorax. Namely, with the swollen area of her head.

Really, didn't this woman see where she was headed?

I guess she didn't.

What followed was something I couldn't quite explain. It was fast, and furious and… genuine.

Stevens explored our casual proximity in a way I didn't expect or was used to, by all means.

When she touched my shirt I thought she was overdoing it and grabbed her wrist, considering shoving her away from me, but then… something right there prevented me from doing so.

What are you doing here?, she had asked, completely overwhelmed with my… action. Whatever. I hated that her posed me such personal question - because yes, the answer was personal. Everything revolving about the subject was indeed very personal.

I don't know., I answered her, being true to her. My tone had been a little harsh, considering the whole situation we were both in.

But then, I decided to take advantage - because there were things I still needed, and had the right to know.

I acted out of instinct. I didn't know where the whole ear-whispering thing had come out from but it was pretty obvious it was working.

Stevens panted as I closed space between us, the contact new and unexpected.

She smelled differently from other women. It wasn't artificial, wasn't… false. Her natural scent wasn't fabricated to seduce or whatever - this was her, the way she smelled, with her pj's underneath her clothes and that huge wool coat that fitted her nicely.

You have to tell me. I demanded, whispering. And she said,

What do you want me to tell you?

I couldn't help but to snort at the question.

Everything.

It was a demand - and she felt it, obviously. For moments I felt triumphant, knowing - no, better than that, being certain I would have my answers, that finally she would say everything to me.

I couldn't be more wrong.

Stevens was very shy, it was a fact. I had learnt to see her as a timid person, cautious and wary of everything, however this time she actually surprised me.

The hand I had grabbed on - hers -, loosened and up it went, along my neck, until she rested her palm on the other side.

The space between my neck and her face closed completely and I felt her breathing against my skin - what worried me. The sensation was very complex, all that intermittent flow or hot air stimulating me wasn't good news.

And then, her urgency. Her body was so tense it was obvious to me she was about to say something very, very serious.

I don't want you to die.

Her words hit me like a rock. I didn't know what to say, what to do - all I knew was that I wouldn't stand much of this contact.

It was too much, too intense and… way too weakening. I couldn't afford to be like that.

No way.

But Stevens kept talking.

I don't. I consumes me… the thought of you turning into-

And in that moment I knew I had to stop - right there.

So I, gradually, pushed her away.

I needed space, the situation was claustrophobic. And I left her room with my heart beating up that hill.

I took several deep breaths as I walked home.

I even paused to see if my heart rate normalized.

But eventually, my physiology seemed to return to normalcy once I was inside my apartment.

And I couldn't help but to think that whatever happened inside that room, would never happen again.

Or I would risk my sanity.

Elie's POV

I just sat in the dark for some time.

I didn't know how many time passed by, and I didn't care. My bedroom remained with the lights out, blue moonlight framing a depressing sight that would resume to me staring at nothingness.

I couldn't just believe what I just did. What he just did.

I was out of my freaking mind, I had to be.

Okay, so the General wasn't a very standard guy - I knew that, very well in fact, so his actions could not be taken lightly. I still didn't know what on Earth drove him to see me in the middle of the night - and by now, I didn't think I wanted to know.

Curiosity killed the cat.

That was what the old saying claimed. And I was stepping the line, crossing the limits with him.

I couldn't let things get out of hand like this. He, most likely in an impulse to satisfy his incessant and obsessive mania of control, wanting to know everything, had behaved so…

God, I sighed, as I recalled those moments.

Why did he do that? Hold me - kind of -, whispering on my ear…

It made no sense.

It wasn't him - at least, not the General I was used to deal with. In here and… virtually speaking.

And I had been very naughty.

I closed my eyes at my recklessness, at my own stupidity. That's what I got for trusting my female instincts.

What was I thinking?

Holding, hugging the man that would… easily kill me bare handed? Speaking my heart to him, telling him with all my hormonal despair that I didn't want him dead?

My heartbeat pounded in my ears, as I realized how serious the whole episode had been.

I couldn't afford to behave like that - no way, I couldn't. Or I would risk everything. If I was doing everything to save everybody's asses from what would come, I had to learn to… get a fucking grip!

I was being mentally rude but hell, it was the truth.

I had to stop with this nonsense and focus on what was really important.

Saving lives.

That was my goal here.

My only goal.

- Late April, 0002. -

Elie's POV

I couldn't feel more awkward.

We were four persons in John's office, all aligned in a circular table. Usually that same table was overboarding with John's papers and research stuff, but now the top of the table was vacant, and I sensed how tense everybody was this morning.

I was off, completely. John talked, talked and I was lost in another land right after he started speaking.

Thing was, it had been a couple of months - give or take - since my nocturnal incident with the General.

After that night, I hadn't seen him, not once. I guessed he avoided me like the plague and I, albeit curious about his thoughts, mentally thanked the heavens that he decided not to come by.

Besides, John was strangely dry with me. I wondered if he had seen or heard the whole thing… since the premises were under surveillance 24/7, and I knew he kept the records, so I guess it was only inevitable to wonder.

God knew how many times I tried to bring up the subject, to see at what extent he knew about the weird-hugging episode between me and the General - but he gave me no chance. Which meant that he probably had seen and heard the whole thing.

The thought consumed me, really. John was the closest thing I had to a friend here… and all of the sudden there was this hole between us. This… gap.

It felt uncomfortable and I, strangely, felt guilty about it - and I didn't know what to do about it either.

This is a nightmare., I thought.

Speaking of which, the person exactly by my left side moved.

Man. I knew who that person was even with my eyes closed.

General.

Our encounter today had been as neutral as it could get. He entered John's office with that stoic face of his, calm and gathered as always… and greeted me so ordinarily it felt… unreal.

I knew he was just being himself and, deep down inside I knew - I really knew -, this was the way he would behave, even if something more inappropriate had happened that damned night.

It was impressive how the man bothered me. His presence, his normal attitude… the whole package was a God damn cocktail from Hell.

And in that exact moment, I felt an elbow hit my arm and I jumped a little in surprise. My eyes refocused and the office was now in silence, three pairs of eyes staring at me very intently.

"Wake up."

The general's serious tone made my face hot with shame.

God. How much time had I been dozing off?

"What?" I whispered, my voice weak.

My eyes met John's, who looked at me with an eyebrow up.

"Elie?" He asked, and I couldn't feel more compressed under every stare.

"Sorry, what were you saying?" I asked, and I cleared my throat, feeling bad enough with my line of thinking of late. That's what I got for thinking inadequacies towards the all-mighty-General.

"I was asking you a question." John's explained, his speech slow. "Avalanche's attack on Shinra HD."

Oh…

"Uh… Oh, right, uh, about that, I-"

"Just give us a minute."

I was harshly interrupted by a hand on my arm, urging me to get up. Which I did, and it took me a while to realize it had been the General asking such thing and that he was already outside when I finally decided to leave the office and well… go and have the freaking minute he asked for. My eyes searched for John's for a moment but he didn't allow it.

It was with great sadness that I saw John's disapproving face and his hard stare somewhere on the sheets of paper on his desk.

Veld just remained quiet as I slowly got outside, only to find Sephiroth with his arms crossed, relaxed with his back against the wall.

I avoided his stare. Man, I felt ashamed for those horrible, intimate moments we had shared two months ago - and yet, it all felt so vivid now.

What an idiot. Why had I decided to hold the man, for Christ's sake!?

"Close the door." He ordered, and I did as he told. I remained there, coexisting in an awkward silence with the omnipotent son of Jenova.

God, that was such a depressing thought!

"Is it Veld?" He asked, and I took the chance to dare - and look back at him.

His eyes couldn't be more… unbiased. As always.

"No."

He removed himself from the wall and walked towards me. I reacted to the prospect of proximity stepping back reflexively. My heartbeat peaked but he seemed not to notice how I actually avoided any kind of… contact.

"Are you sure?" He asked, finally stopping at a safe distance. "Because if it is, I won't kill him in front of you."

Oh, for Christ's sake, what a freaking obsession with that issue!

I took a deep breath and gathered myself. Okay, this nonsense had to stop.

"No, it's not… Veld." I declared, my eyes now on his. My face was a little angled, up, so our stares could meet.

The General narrowed his eyes at me, as he continued.

"Then what is the matter with you today?"

Oh, that. Oh man, what a lie I would have to conjure to avoid his umcomfortable questions. I was willing to bet he was thinking I was withdrawing information or something. In the General's mind, conspiracy was always an option.

Always.

"I'm a little off, that's it." I said, my hand travelling to the bridge of my nose.

What a lousy excuse.

"Off?"

The tone the man had used had been one of surprise. He really didn't get a normal human being could, actually, be a little off sometimes. He, clearly, wasn't used to the word 'off' in such context.

"Let's get inside." I said, making a move towards the door, but failing completely. His hand rested on my shoulder and I stopped, surprised at his action.

What the…?

"Stevens." He asked for my name, and our stares met without difficulty. "We're all on the same side. There's no need to be off."

I processed his speech, a little confused at first. But damn, his touch was weird and I wanted him to let me go, right fucking now. Don't touch me. Please.

"I know." I said, making a movement so his hand would fly off my shoulder. "I know that." I insisted, and he got the cue.

"If you actually know that, then why are you trembling like a petrified child?"

I gulped as his words, and I almost gave in to the temptation of saying to him 'I'm not trembling!', but I decided otherwise. Physiology was a bitch and he was far more mental than I was - so I wouldn't be arguing over a silly provocation again.

It was having enough of that.

I opened my mouth to speak but instead, another voice came out. John. Standing right by the door I'd closed moments ago.

"Am I interrupting something?"

I blinked at him, feeling genuinely offended by such statement.

"No." I declared, widening my eyes at him. Geez.

"No, of course not." The general clarified and made a sign of us to get inside. And, for the first time today, I agreed to him. "Let's… get on with it."

"Yes, that would be nice."

It was impossible to miss the sarcasm in John's voice. If I had any doubt he was clearly mad about me, it was pretty clear now that John knew about the whole thing that had happened between me and the General that fatidic night.

Damn. I would have to talk with John about that later. I wouldn't lose a great friend over some nonsense! No way.

We sat on our chairs in silence and I decided to start talking this time.

"I'm sorry, uh... okay then," I said, clearing my throat and trying to focus on the information I had to disclose.

But Veld started first.

"Did you know about Heidegger?"

We both locked stares as I answered him.

"I did."

"I would appreciate you would inform us of events of such nature. It was very unpleasant seeing the President dismiss me, even if-"

"You would get your job back after Junon." I declared, "Didn't you?"

Veld stared at me in silence and the General was the one answering him instead.

"I told you."

Veld didn't trust anybody. Not me, not anyone. So I took the chance to calm him down a little.

"Besides, the President and you see eye to eye in many other things. For instance, you both believe Hojo is the one behind the information leak, am I right?"

Veld gulped dry at my declaration.

No one talked in the room and I decided to change subject. It was time to press on important matters.

"And speaking of leak… Lazard will flee. He has contacts with Hollander and, well, he thinks it's only a matter of time he'll be exposed."

"When will that happen?" Veld was the one popping the question.

"Early Summer."

"There's still time." Veld concluded, but the General spoke at once.

"And should we stop him?"

The question was directed to me.

"I don't think Lazard is that important. Honestly."

John spoke for the first time.

"So let's focus on the next attack, please."

I tried not to give importance to his dry tone and summoned some control. It's almost done, I thought to myself. Soon the Nibelheim event would come and things would be sorted out! So I had to be patient and bear with some unfairness on the way.

"In June AVALANCHE will attack Shinra HD and will release Hojo's test subjects from his labs to create havoc. They'll try to coax Hojo into research for them and he'll take the chance."

I heard someone snort - the General.

"Somehow that doesn't surprise me."

I continued.

"The Turks will take over of the attack pretty efficiently but the General will be called to deal with the situation."

Sephiroth stared at me a little surprised. He wasn't expecting his name to pop up like that. I eyed him and explained what would happen.

"There'll be a creature from Hojo's lab for you to kill and there is a helicopter to prevent from flying off. Even if some elements of AVALANCHE will run away, the goal is to retrieve Hojo."

"Very well."

"After that, AVALANCHE's priorities will change. No attacks 'till the end of the year."

There was a small pause, then John was the one speaking.

"Are we clear?"

We all nodded.

"Just write everything down, all the details you can remember." John informed, as he arranged the papers on the table. "We'll gather again after the mission is complete."

"Okay." I whispered, realizing everybody was getting up from the chairs.

Wow. This had been a quick meeting.

And as I saw Veld, the General and John talking among them, I decided to walk out silently. I wasn't needed in the office anymore - thank God.

All these meetings were starting to make me sick - and I knew why. The moment was slowly approaching. Nibelheim. And also the fatidic moment of-

"Stevens."

I jumped at the sound of my name, in the exact moment I was dialing the code of the door leading to my premises.

I turned and saw a very serious General. The sight plagued me and my conscience beeped in that exact moment. Our eyes met and I advised myself to behave rationally - just like he did. There was no need for him to know his presence actually bothered me. All I had to do was convince myself everything was fine… that was simply it. Namely because the General clearly considered everything was more than okay and I wanted very badly to agree with his point of view.

"Yes?"

He blinked a couple of times before speaking.

"Any advice?"

Excuse me?

"Advice? From me?" I asked, my eyebrows up. Man, how weird was that! THE Sephiroth asking for my advice on a mission!? The General didn't say a thing, he just stood there waiting for my answer instead. Eventually, his seriousness made me return to Earth, so to speak.

"Just… be yourself. The dragon you'll face won't stand a chance against you and your modest sword."

He took his time reacting.

"Hum."

I nodded at his medieval answer. But suddenly, he changed subject.

"You said AVALANCHE's priorities will change. What does that mean?"

"They'll go after who they believe to be an Ancient of sorts. They'll become obsessed with knowing the location of the Promised Land."

The General took his time processing my words before talking again.

"Quite religious of them."

"Well… yes."

"Thank you." He said, with a low tone. "And I haven't forgotten you owe me the traitor's identity."

I sighed, amazed at how insisting he could be over such - unimportant - matter. Right, there was a traitor, but there were things far more important to deal from now on. One of them stood exactly in front of me, eyeing me with that attitude.

"When it's time, you'll be the first to know." I declared, not knowing where I would summon more patience. "Cross my words."

"Very well." He said, nodding.

And then, I just saw him leave the hall and close the door behind him.

Now that's bloody rude.

"And good bye to you too." I whispered, as I re-dialed the code to enter my premises.

A/N- I hope you liked this chapter. It's a little weird to describe the way both felt after that hugging thing, I know, but their interaction is not very standard, hence the need of… making that issue clear here. Anyway, I don't think that's new to anybody.

The moment of the truth is coming… and soon all of them would be put to test. :)

The support, the reviews, the whole thing is just amazing, I can't wait to read more of your comments and opinions! Keep it coming! R&R with all your might! :)