Takes place at some point in the future...
"Hey, are you okay?"
Andrew just came back from work. He wanted to talk to Meredith ever since they finished their surgery on a little girl together. He had noticed that something was wrong, but he didn't know what. It was a hectic day, and he only saw Meredith disappear in the next OR, before he was paged to the pit, without having a chance to talk to her. An emergency surgery on the boy from the pit took two hours longer than his shift due to complications, but in the end they could save him.
When he saw Meredith lying in their bed, only looking up to greet him, he knew that whatever had bothered her earlier, was still on her mind.
"Not really, but I will be." He saw Meredith turning her head a little, so, she could see him better. A sad smile on her lips, trying to assure him that she would be fine.
"Do you want to talk about it?" He knew how strong she was, that she would be fine in the end. But he wanted her to know that if she wanted to, he would listen to her.
"Not yet."
"Okay." He leaned down to her, placing a small kiss on her forehead. The thumb of his hand grazing over her cheek one time. "I will be back in a few minutes." He stood up again, offering her a smile, before he went in the bathroom to take a shower after the long and exhausting day at work.
…
When Andrew laid down a bit later, he thought Meredith had already fallen asleep. She was lying on her side, with her back to him. Something he had realized she did, not because she was mad at him or didn't want him to be there, but it was what she did whenever something was on her mind.
Most of the time, he just let her know that he was there for her, that she could talk to him when she was ready. And almost always she did. Sometimes she was searching for his comfort that he willingly offered. And he knew she could do this alone, but he wanted her to know that she didn't have to.
Only by the way she scooted a little closer to him, after he leant over to kiss her goodnight, let him know that she was still awake. And knowing that she wasn't feeling better, made his heart ache for her. She was always there for him, she was the one who got him through his worst and he wanted to help her somehow.
"You're amazing. You know that, right?" Andrew started after a moment.
She didn't answer, but he knew that she was awake and listening and that was all he wanted. He knew how much strength she had inside her, he knew this wasn't the worst thing that had happened to her, by far. But sometimes everybody could use a little bit of love.
"You are…" Andrew started slowly "an amazing surgeon, a wonderful mother" he saw her turning around carefully "and an overall incredible person." He finished, with a small smile towards her, now that she was facing him. He could see that his words affected her, in a positive way with a mix of surprise and curiosity, where he was coming from.
"You" he continued emphasizing softly "always try to do everything to help other people. Your patients, your sisters, your kids" he stopped before he added a little lower "me." He gave her a smile. "And it's one of the things I love most about you."
"And when you are with your children" Andrew's smile got wider at the image of her with her kids. He loved to see her as a mother. Raising three kids that were just as amazing as their mother "It always reminds me how strong the four of you are. You have three beautiful children. And you are an amazing mother, Meredith." He could see how her eyes started to shine at the mention of her kids. He knew how important they were to her. And he could only imagine what they have been through already.
He kept looking at Meredith for a moment, searching for her eyes. He could still see the pain that something today had caused her in them. But it also seemed like there was a small part of happiness forming inside her. A small smile was slowly visible on her face. And at the same time, he noticed that his words seemed to overwhelm her. He could see that she didn't expect him to say all that. But he needed her to know how he felt. He wanted her to know.
"…and for me…" Andrew started again, gently bringing his hand to her head, after putting a strand of hair behind her ear again. "You are like…" he searched for the right words, to put his own feelings into words "Like a feeling that makes me happy whenever I feel down." He let his thumb graze over her cheek one time. He saw her close her eyes at the motion, leaning into his touch a little more. "When you kiss me" he continued, seeing her open her eyes again, looking expectantly at what he would say next. A big smile appeared on his lips, before he continued softly "you make everything feel right…" He saw a smile forming on her lips. One of the things he loved most on her. "Every time you smile at me, all the dark starts to fade away." He added slowly, trying to tell her that he meant every word. "And when I see your eyes, they give me hope." He searched for her eyes again, hoping that she could feel how much she meant to him.
"You're the most beautiful surprise that happened to me." He ended, leaning over to her to kiss her forehead one more time.
"Andrew…" Meredith whispered. He could see that she tried to say something in return, but couldn't find her words. But he didn't tell her, wanting to hear the same. He told her because he needed her to know that she was loved. Because he wanted her to know how much he loved her.
"You don't need to say anything. I just- want you to know how much you mean to me." He gave her a smile to assure her that it was okay. That he didn't expect her to say anything. That this wasn't the purpose behind his confession.
"I love you, Mer. And I hope you're feeling better tomorrow." Andrew let his hand graze over her shoulder, stroking down her arm, before he took her hand in his, squeezing it one time and then let go of her for a moment.
He knew that she liked to have her space at times, that she wasn't a person who liked to cuddle much, and he was willing to give that to her, to just be with her. But by the way she was leaning into his touch earlier, searching for the comfort he offered, he knew that today she wanted his closeness. She wanted his embrace.
"Come, here." Andrew lifted the blanket a little, so she could get closer to him, lying his arm around her.
…
Andrew had just arrived at the hospital when he saw Meredith at the nurses' station. He only remembered that her pager went off this morning; that she had been called in to the hospital. The kiss she gave him, before he fell asleep again for a few more hours. He went over to her, a coffee for her in his hand, knowing that she could use it after being at the hospital since the early morning.
"Hey, how is your emergency case from this morning." He handed her the coffee.
"He will make it." She answered him, before she added more softly "Thank you." She looked up from her coffee to him. "Do you have a minute?"
They looked for a room away from all the nurses and doctors to have some minutes alone, without anyone listening to them. A few moments later they found themselves in one of the exam rooms on the floor. He closed the door behind them, before turning to Meredith to see what was on her mind.
"Andrew," she took a step closer to him, reaching out to him, letting her hands rest on his back. It didn't take him long to mirror her movements, to bring her in his arms, letting his hands rest on her sides.
"What you said yesterday.." She looked up at him, trying to find his eyes "It meant more to me than you know." She smiled at him as if she wanted to thank him, before she closed her eyes again, taking a deep breath. "I was thinking about my childhood, my mother who always wanted me to be extraordinary and never left out a chance to tell me how disappointed she was that in her eyes I only was ordinary." He saw how she couldn't quite meet his eyes while telling him this. He had noticed over the past few years that she didn't talk much about her parents; that she didn't like to talk about them, because it was something that was still hard for her.
Andrew instinctively brought her a little closer to him, as if he could take all that away from her if he just held her long enough. He knew he couldn't, but he wished it would help anyway.
He wanted to say something, but as soon as she noticed his attempt, she cut him off.
"I made peace with it, somehow." Meredith tried to tell him, that it was okay, that she had found a way to deal with it for most of the time "She… loved me in her own way, but especially as a child I often didn't feel that way." She took a moment to look up at him after she finished. "And this case yesterday, this little girl, she reminded me of myself." She told him what had brought back all her memories; she let him know why she wasn't feeling well yesterday.
They were silent for a moment, just looking at one another. He wanted to say something, but words didn't seem to be enough, so he was slowly leaning in a little closer, gently placing a kiss on her lips, just to let her know that he loved her. He lingered there for a moment, before he slightly pulled away again.
"Andrew" Meredith started again, searching for his eyes "You… overwhelm me sometimes." She gave him a small smile, talking about last night "And I'm not that good with words." She added a little lighter, making both of them chuckle slightly, before she got a bit more serious again "But… I want you to know that I feel the same." This time it was her who was leaning in for another kiss.
"I love you, too, Andrew."
This was the last fanfic for now... But as I said before, I plan on writing more, just not now...
This story was also inspired by two songs, here are a few lines... :)
If you're lost and alone in the dark and you're all cried out
If you're bruised and you're broken, I'm hoping you'll hear me out
Sometimes everybody needs a
Little bit of love
When you're down and out, your heart is breaking
Little bit of love
And with every single smile you're faking it
Little bit of love
I got a little bit of love
I got a little bit of love
- Little bit of love, JP Cooper
You'll feel better tomorrow (Tomorrow)
Even though I know there's nothing going right (Nothing going right)
You'll feel better tomorrow
If you want me to I'll stay with you all night (Stay with you all night)
-Better Tomorrow, Matt Simons