- Hey, Luca! - She called the man who watched TV. - Shall we play in the park?
- We will! - The man agreed getting up. - And then can we have an ice cream?
- Of course! You behaved well these days and deserve a two-ball ice cream. - The brunette said stroking the man's hair. - And your father will pick you up this afternoon.
- Yay! - The man said jumping with joy.
- Ah, you mean you don't like being here with me? - Natasha joked.
- Yes I like. - Luca showed regret for what he said.
- Look, my love. I'm kidding. - Natasha bent down to the man's height. - Of course you miss your parents, and your little sister. - She touched her grandson's face and placed a kiss on his cheek.
Tasha had not seen Reade in two weeks. She hadn't known what to think about the two since he kissed her and she said they were just friends. Still, she thought she had done the right thing, as it would not be a moment of confusion that would spoil what they had.
All these days she missed Reade, missed his company at the table next to her, missed him on the field giving him cover, missed him criticizing his bad mood in the morning. God, how he was missing.
Tasha didn't have the courage to call or go to see him in those two weeks, she felt bad about what had happened. She was aware that she had encouraged him when he kissed her. She liked the kiss, she couldn't deny it, but she also wouldn't admit it to him. I didn't know if I would ever be ready for this. Whether she would be ready to admit what she felt. Reade had been her friend for a long time and inside her he was much more than that and she would never lose him. She would not let her feelings spoil what they had.
That morning Reade was at his desk when she saw him. He looked at her and her heart raced and the brunette couldn't contain the smile of satisfaction that formed on her face. How she had missed her partner!
- Hi! - She said approaching.
- Hi.
- It's all right? - Tasha asked blandly.
- Okay. I'm a lot better. - Reade was referring to the leg. - What did I miss while I was away?
- Nothing more. - Tasha informed him. - Borden is a spy. And, they got that rat out of the closet.
- Did you get my man, Whitey Bulger?
Reade tried to joke, but he was also dismayed after everything that happened.
- Tasha ... I was medicated and confused ... - He explained.
- Then that's it. - The brunette was clearly disappointed to hear that, but maybe it was for the best. - I know. Are we all right, then?
- A hundred per cent. - He said giving her a smile. - I'm going to see Patterson.
- And I'll look at these files.
It was good to have Reade again at SIOC. They worked all day, went to the field and at the end of the day they were in the elevator going.
- Let's drink something. - Tasha wanted to break the boring atmosphere that had settled between them.
- It's my first day, I'm tired.
- Let's drink something. - She repeated.
- It's ok. Just a beer. - Reade always gave in to Tasha's requests. She had this gift about him and apparently that hadn't changed.
- Just don't hit me afterwards. - The brunette joked and received a reproachful look at her comment.
- Excuse me. - Tasha said after settling in at the bar and ordering the first beer. - I didn't mean to embarrass you. You just caught me off guard. Your face approaching ...
- I was there. We don't need to go into details. - Reade joked trying to hide his embarrassment. - We really don't need it.
Tasha laughed while drinking. They were having fun, though.
- You think you're the only funny one, don't you? - Reade smiled between sips. - You're not even my type.
- Too smart or too classy? - The brunette pretended seriousness.
- Classy? Oh really? - Tasha really didn't think she had much class. He screamed watching games, drank pure whiskey, drank beer straight from the bottle, among other things that could be listed. - Bring me a double, please. - Reade addressed the attendant. - Tasha, everything that happened recently. Jones, Akkadian, the hunt for terrorists ... my head stayed ... is that ...
- Accepted apologies. - She raised her hands showing that everything was fine.
Tasha knew that this was not what she wanted to hear. She wanted him to say that it was not the fault of the drugs or the confusion of events. The latina wanted him to say that he kissed her because he wanted to, because he had feelings for her. And she also meant that she liked the kiss and wanted to try it again. But I knew it would never be like that. She was just a friend to him and he wasn't even his type.
- Really. Now, let's not talk about it again. - The brunette asked.
- I agree. - Reade said without taking his eyes off the brunette in front of him.
- Right. - The two looked at each other while emptying the contents of their glasses. - I think someone's watching you. - Tasha showed a blonde woman seated at the front.
- And you're not lying. - Reade agreed looking back.
- Now, are you closing already? - He spoke when he saw Tasha get up and get her things to go.
- Yes, I lost the habit of having you around. Double the work. - The brunette joked trying to look serious. - You'll be fine?
- Yes, Tasha. I am strong and can take care of myself.
Natasha got up and walked over to where the blonde woman was sitting. - He's all yours. - He went to her and went to the exit door of the bar.
While putting on her coat she allowed herself to look where she was before and the woman was already taking the seat next to Reade. Tasha left hating herself for what she had just done, but she knew it was too late and it was certainly for the best. Drowning out her feelings was what she had been used to doing since she was very young.
The days went by and Tasha went to work, taking a step back from her feelings about Reade. A few days later the man told him that Freddy's ex-girlfriend had come to him and Tasha realized that Reade felt guilty about what had happened to his friend and tried to reassure him by saying that none of this was his fault and that he should forget about it.
Natasha started to notice Reade's delays, other days he didn't show up at the gym before work, and it was something they always did together. Something was going on, but I still didn't know what. She tried to advise her friend to seek professional help, as everything that had happened had moved him too much and would not be erased overnight. The brunette knew what it was like to try to get out of something like this alone. While he did not seek help for his gambling addiction he was unable to break free.
- Reade. - Tasha addressed him when she saw him taking things to leave work. - I'm sorry if I'm picking on you. I just want to make sure that you're okay.
- I appreciate your concern. Really. - The man said sincerely. - For the first time I feel like I can breathe, have fun.
- Who is she? - Tasha smiled imagining that there was a woman in the play.
- There's nothing like that, Tasha.
- It's good not to screw this one too. - Her heart ached when she said that to him, but really she wanted to see him happy. - I'm serious. You deserve to be happy. Don't let anything get in the way.
- It's ok. - He smiled in thanks.
- See you tomorrow. - The brunette said goodbye and left.
Every day Reade seemed more strange to Tasha, always aerial, distracted even in the field, lying a few times too. It left her and the team in danger several times. After the day she advised him to be happy, she decided not to say anything more and put that matter aside.
They talked banalities one morning after leaving the gym.
- Agents Reade and Zapata! - Briana came up behind them calling them. - It's your lucky day.
- Is there hot water in the shower? - Reade made a joke.
- Will we have self-service in the cafeteria? - Tasha joined in the game too.
- Almost. - The woman spoke. - They were chosen for the random toxicological examination.
- I don't think you know the meaning of luck. - Tasha complained.
- It will only take a few minutes. - Briana spoke again.
- Can't you tell us about it? - The brunette spoke with irony.
- I don't think you know the meaning of random. - The woman left with Tasha in pursuit when she realized that Reade was not coming after them. - Agent Reade.
- I'm feeling something strange. A stomachache. - The agent lied.
- You can't leave sight until the collection is complete. - Briana warned him.
- Really. I need to go home ... - He spoke again.
- Excuse. It's FBI policy. - The woman explained.
Reade gave in under the confused look of Tasha, who was unable to explain precisely what had just happened there.
- What was that thing about saying you had to go home? - Tasha asked while waiting to be called to collect the exam
- I'm not even feeling well. - Reade stated.
- I told you not to drink that last whiskey yesterday. - She was referring to the drinks night they had at Weller's house the day before. - You drink like a preteen. - Tasha saw him crestfallen. - Are you worried about getting caught? I know you like those grass cakes.
- Yes. - He confirmed trying to end that conversation.
- Agent Edgar Reade! You're next. - The nurse called.
Tasha saw him go to the collection room and still very confused by all that talk.
- What is? Marijuana, amphetamine? - She pressed him as soon as they left the exam room.
- No. Cocaine. - Reade confessed.
- Cocaine, Reade? - She asked, disappointed.
- It's only been a few times, Tasha. I was just relaxing. - The man tried to justify himself.
- Relaxing is having a beer. This is a heavy thing. - The friend scolded him.
- It's not that serious!
- Isn't it serious? You are about to get caught in the FBI's anti-doping! - She spoke loudly. - And you think it's not serious?
- Do you want to speak louder? - He said quietly.
- You must tell Weller. I'm serious. - Reade shook his head. - He better hear from you than someone from HR.
- He's going to go crazy. - Reade was talking about Weller's reaction.
- No. He knows what you went through. - He won't be heavy. - Tasha tried to embarrass him. - We are a family.
- That's what people say. He's my boss and he'll have to tell his boss.
- And what is the other option? - The brunette comforted him.
- She leaves the body between twenty-four and forty-eight hours. - Reade explained.
- When was the last time you used it? Tasha asked.
- Yesterday morning.
- In the morning? Tasha raised a hand to her face, clearly concerned for him. - So you're still on time.
- Yes.
They were interrupted by a call from Patterson
- Let's change. And talk to Weller, please!
- I received my results, and you? - Tasha asked Reade before they left.
- Negative. I think I was lucky. - He said relieved.
- Luck? This was something serious. - She scolded him. - No matter the outcome, you must solve this problem.
- It was a two-day spree. It's over. - He stated.
- The drug may have run out, but not the reason for using it.
- Jones is dead. Freddy is gone. I can throw the drug away.
- Reade...
- Thank you for everything you've done for me. Really, you know. That was a warning, I'll be fine.
- Talk to Weller and take a break. Seek help.
- I don't need help, Tasha. - Reade refused to admit that he was in trouble.
- I say this from the bottom of my heart. - She spoke clearly annoyed. - You will talk to Weller or I will do it.
- You won't do that! - By his expression Tasha showed him that he would do it if necessary. - You are my best friend.
- That's exactly why I'll do it.
Tasha left with her eyes burning with tears. She hated being in this situation, but Reade did not accept help leaving her with no options.
That night the brunette went to Weller's house and told him about Reade. Her heart ached for having to do this, but she wanted to help him. The brunette knew that if he continued this and did not seek help, he would sink every time.
The next day Weller called him to talk and Tasha saw when Reade left the boss's room angrily. She knew that the conversation had not gone well. Weller probably said something that Reade didn't like.
- Reade... - She tried to talk to him as soon as she left the chief's office.
- Go to hell! - He turned his back on her and left SIOC.
Natasha did not know if she regretted what she did, as she ended up pushing her friend further away and that was not her intention. She only wanted to help him, but once again she had put her feet in her hands.
When she was leaving she reached for her cell phone to try to talk to him, but she didn't know what to say and she also didn't know how she would be received, so she gave up and left, deciding to give her time.
Their past had these dark parts that brought a lot of pain to his chest. Seeing Edgar in that situation and trying to help him in vain were moments that made her feel worthless, helpless.
- Grandmother! You are crying? - Luca asked approaching her who was sitting on the park bench while the man played with the other children.
- No my love. - She denied it. - I think it was a speck that came to my eye with the wind.