Natasha was lying on his chest after making love. It was so good to have him back after more than a week. She never needed a man to defend her, but knowing that he was at her side gave her double security. He had already fallen asleep, but she still allowed herself to stay awake for a while thinking about her life. In everything that brought her to this day.

- Are you already going? - Reade asks when he sees her dressed sitting on the edge of the bed putting on her boots.

- Yes. - She confirmed. - I took a towel from the closet and took a shower. - Tasha said as she continued getting ready.

- You can use whatever you need, you know. - He replied sitting on the bed with the sheets covering only from the waist down. She glanced over and couldn't help but notice how calmer he was than when she arrived the night before.

While taking a shower Tasha went over all the events. Watching the video was terrible. By far one of the worst experiences of his life, but if Reade needed her for this moment she would be with him. And after the tape ended it all happened very fast. Tasha couldn't say what happened to her to do that. Today thinking about what he did, he was sure that the moment was not right, and he would still have to deal with the consequences. She knew she induced Reade, because he wasn't thinking straight due to everything that was going on. Not that she thought he didn't want to, but they were friends and she had made that clear herself when he kissed her.

- I'll prepare breakfast for us. - Reade got up picking up his clothes on the floor.

- It's not necessary, Reade. I buy something on the way. - Tasha took her bag that was thrown on the chair and rummaged inside looking for her cell phone.

- Tash... - Reade called her.

- Yes. - She turned her attention away from what she was doing and looked at him for the first time since he woke up.

- Are we going to be okay? - He asked worriedly.

- Of course! We always do. - The girl stated.

- Everything that happened yesterday... - He paused. - The tape, and then ...

- Reade! It's okay, really. - She gave him a sincere smile. - I want to know about you. What are you thinking of doing?

- I'm going to pack some things and talk to Weller. Excuse me and ask for a license. - Reade was already dressed and approached Tasha who was near the door.

- I'm very happy, Reade. - She said smiling. - I was worried about everything that was happening to you. - She said very quietly really worried.

- I know, Tasha. I'm sorry for the way I treated you. - Reade said sorry. - You were not to blame for anything and I dumped everything on you.

- It's all right. - She gave him a sincere smile. If she stayed another minute in that apartment, she knew she might have the impulse to throw herself into his arms and repeat all the actions from the night before. But she couldn't do that. They were friends, and Tasha wasn't even his type. - I am going.

A few weeks passed after the night they watched the tape. Tasha saw very little Reade. Most of the times they met was when he went to the SIOC for sessions with Dr. Sun and for shooting training. What he was doing was Weller's conditions for him to return and not be told what had happened to his superiors.

Tasha was happy that he got a second chance and was willing to change. She and Reade didn't talk about what they did that night. They both knew it was an impulse at a time of extreme weakness. It was good, very good, neither of them would deny it. Sleeping in his arms made her feel happy and safe, even in a condition like that, and she knew it made him feel that way too. She knew that if she had a choice, she would never go back or change what they did.

The problem is that the recklessness of the two brought another cause for concern for the brunette who was already almost pulling her hair out with this possibility. The days passed and she had not had the courage to take an exam, as she was in denial. One thing she knew, neither of them was able to raise a child in the situation they were in. Reade all messed up recovering from his traumas and Tasha increasingly demanded at work, because they were at a crucial moment of an investigation to dismantle a terrorist organization and it was apparently far from over, and without Reade they were with one less and she he needed to give everything to his team.

She was always out of work, she always lived for it and she didn't think she would be able to change like that all of a sudden. A son. No, they couldn't, not now. She couldn't bring Reade into this situation. They didn't have to go through this. She knew what would be the right thing to do. He just needed to wait a few more days to build up the courage and take the damn exam.

That morning she woke up determined. When he returned from work, he would stop by the pharmacy and buy the exam. I was tired of putting it off. She had already cried for fear of the result. Tasha had never thought about being a mother, but she knew that maybe that day would come, but she hoped she was prepared, because she wanted to be a good person for her son and she honestly didn't feel ready, but she also didn't know if she would have the courage to have an abortion. A son of Reade. It was all she could ask for, because she knew she really loved him. But would Reade want her child? It was destroying her from the inside and she didn't even know how to explain how she was managing to concentrate on work. Patterson had realized that she was worried because she asked him, but she made up some excuse that seems to have convinced the blonde to leave her alone.

Ready! Exam purchased. Now it was just a matter of carrying out the procedures. She had to know. I needed to get this out of your head. He opened the package and followed the procedures. While he waited, he went into the kitchen to make some coffee. Those five minutes seemed like an eternity. She went back to the bathroom and checked the exam. A red line. She slid against the cold wall of the bathroom and sat on the floor. He let the tears flow. I didn't know if it was relief or disappointment. As much as she knew she was unable to have a child at that moment, she felt sad. What if I never had a chance again? Reade's son was more than she could ever dream of. But on the other hand, she didn't even know if he wanted to have a child with her and he wouldn't feel forced into this situation. She wasn't even your type.

After the shock, she took out her cell phone and called him. - Reade! - She said excitedly as soon as he answered. – Let's go out for a drink?

Today she thought that if she had been pregnant and had an abortion, she would have regretted it bitterly. And Reade would never forgive her if she did it without telling him and he found out later. Natasha thought she was very immature and insecure at the time. I had no idea of the greatness that was motherhood. And if it had happened at that time and she had carried on with the pregnancy, perhaps it would have saved her from taking many actions that left hurts in several people she loved.

- Still awake? He asked when he saw her fidgeting on the bed. - Come here he pulled her closer.

The brunette snuggled her body in his and closed her eyes, succumbing to sleep. There was nothing better than to close your eyes at night and have a light and peaceful sleep. That was how she felt. In peace.