Category: Hurt and Comfort
Characters: Shota Aizawa, Izuku Midoriya
Pain … Blinding pain pulsed across Shota's face like red-hot lava as he lay prone on the ground. No, not lay ; he was pressed, crushed against the pavement with hot sticky blood flowing out of his mouth and nose to smear across his cheek. The gray-haired young villain's high-pitched cackles bounced inside his ears, only adding to the skull-splitting pounding in his head. Shota's vision blurred as his brain withered under the assault, and he lapsed into unconsciousness no matter how much he told himself to hold on, hold on, hold on …
Shota jerked upright in bed with a gasp. The ghost of the searing pain ebbed into a dull ache as the remnants of his shattered eye socket lamented with phantom trauma. It took a few moments for Shota to recognize that he was not at the USJ but safe in his bed in the U.A. dormitory.
His heaving breaths slowly mellowed, the cold sweat slowly dwindled to coat him in a layer of perspiration, and his constricted pupils slowly dilated as his eyelids drifted over them. With an agonized groan, he drew his hand over his face.
" Damn... "
Shota's muscles felt as if he'd boxed a gorilla. They ached and throbbed terribly, protesting as he flipped the sweat-soaked sheets off himself. The cold air blowing from the air conditioner washed over his body, allowing the sweat to sap even more heat from his system. He rubbed the bare skin of his legs as the coarse black hairs stood to attention, trying to force warmth back into his chilling body. After a few minutes, he slipped off the bed and padded barefoot out of the room towards the dormitory kitchen.
The moon streamed through the row of floor-to-ceiling glass windows framing the wall of the living room. The bushes lining the building gleamed like polished malachite as the stark contrasts of darkness and light clashed in their leaves. The wind whistled through the boughs of the skinny trees scattered across the courtyard to flicker against the windows like moths flapping at an illuminated dull yellow lightbulb. A peaceful night, for all intents and purposes…
A peaceful night for everyone but Shota that is.
Shota rubbed at his aching eye as he used his other hand to rifle blindly through a cabinet. Occasionally, he'd pluck a box from the depths to squint critically at it, using the soft white light to read the labels. After several failed attempts, he finally secured his desired midnight snack- chamomile tea.
Though Hizashi and Nemuri gave him hell for it, Shota consumed almost as much tea as coffee. He'd taken to natural sleep supplements after melatonin pills had failed to lull him into a decent night's rest. Their resident tea connoisseur, Momo Yaoyorozu, had enlightened him to more adventurous blends of brewable sleeping droughts, but this night he settled for the classic.
Shota procured a random mug from the cabinet (Izuku's, judging from the All Might hero suit patterning) and filled it with tap water before popping it into the microwave. Through baggy, lidded eyes, he watched the colorful cup spin slowly in the appliance, all while swinging the bag of tea lazily around his finger. The seconds counted down one by one, and he focused on the depleting neon figures, lest his nightmare seep back into his mind to haunt his waking life too.
A small squeak made Shota straighten up and squint into the depths of the living room. Through the shroud of darkness cloaking most of the room, Shota caught a glimpse of wild pine-green bedhead and gleaming emerald eyes.
"Midoriya," Shota drawled in recognition. He looked back to the rotating mug in the microwave, trying to use it to distract from the humming in his nerves. Though the logical part of Shota knew that the odds of being attacked in a school dormitory in the wee hours of the night were slim to none, adrenaline has still gushed through his bloodstream upon sensing the young boy enter. His tensed fist slowly uncurled as he forced himself to relax, and he watched out of the corners of his eyes as the bashful Izuku shuffled into the room.
"Up late grading papers, sir?" Izuku asked with a wavery smile as he pulled open a cabinet. He bee-lined for the box of animal crackers on the top shelf, pulling down the red box along with a small plastic bowl.
"Not exactly," Shota huffed in amusement. For several moments, the only sounds in the kitchen were the crackling of the plastic bag of animal crackers, the cookie-like snacks thudding against the bottom of the bowl as Izuku poured them, and the consistent humming of the appliance in front of Shota. "What are you doing awake at this hour? It's well past curfew."
Though Shota was mostly joking, Izuku jerked violently in surprise, spilling animal crackers all over the counter.
"W-wah! I'm sorry, sir, I just-!" Izuku babbled, hastily scooping up the scattered crackers to dump them in the bowl. "I just- I, um…" As he trailed off, his movements slowed until his hand rested on the counter, still clutching several of the snacks. "I… Had a nightmare about the summer camp incident…"
Shota watched Izuku through half-closed but scrutinizing eyes. Izuku's fist clenched, cracking the cookies into small pieces as he stared glassily at the bowl of animal crackers as if it were now a foreign object. "I dreamed that… it went a lot worse than it did, and…" Izuku clenched his fists so tight that his scarred knuckles glared white in the gloom. "I couldn't protect anyone."
Even in the sparse lighting, Shota could see the frustrated tears blooming in the corners of Izuku's eyes. The microwave beeped shrilly in Shota's ear to herald the boiling of his mug of water. Shota inhaled sharply, then exhaled deeply and turned to busy himself with pulling out the piping-hot cup of water to dunk the bag of chamomile tea into it. As the yellow-gold flavoring diffused through the clear liquid, Shota idly stirred the bag around to speed up the steeping.
"I know how you feel," he said after several moments. He kept his back to Izuku, continuously drawing the teabag around the bottom rim of the mug, but he could feel the boy's widened eyes on him. "That's one of the scariest feelings… That you can't protect the people that you care about." He reached up, ghosting his fingertips over the crescent moon-shaped scar decorating the underside of his eye.
Shota had grappled with that fear for such a very long time. It never seemed to leave him. As soon as he thought perhaps that he'd been able to move on, to grow strong enough that he didn't need to be afraid before, reality reared its ugly head to squash him back into the dirt. Sometimes, quite literally.
"Do you have nightmares too, Mr. Aizawa?"
Shota smiled wryly, finally glancing over his shoulder to look at Izuku. The boy watched him adamantly; doubt and a need for reassurance swam in his bright green irises. Shota may not be the cuddliest, most fatherly man alive, but he was a teacher. Consolation was something he could attempt to give, at least.
"Of course I do," he said, turning so that his back now pressed against the counter. One elbow propped loosely against the tile, while his other bent in the air as he rubbed the nape of his neck. His eye twinged with phantom pain, remembering once more the feeling of his bones shattering against cracking concrete. "Anyone in this line of work who tells you otherwise is a liar."
Izuku let out a tiny chuckle, and it seemed like his expression brightened just a bit. Shota smiled as he looked down at his tea. The golden brew had blended through the hot water. He grabbed a bottle of honey and stirred a spoonful of it into the tea. When he sipped it, the sweet flavor of the honey and the muted tone of chamomile spread over his tongue, filling him with a warm sense of calm.
He turned back to Izuku, holding up the All Might mug and supping casually at his beverage. With a wry smile, he tapped the edge of the cheesy smile adorning the bottom half of the cup.
"Take All Might, for example. I know for a fact that he has nightmares."
Izuku's face scrunched up in a mix of amusement and disbelief.
"No way!" the boy laughed and waved a hand dismissively at Shota. "He's All Might !" However, as realization dawned on him, his entertained smile sagged into a sad one. "Though I guess… He has been through a lot, especially recently. I guess there has to be at least one thing that he regrets, and that haunts him…"
"Of course. Being the Symbol of Peace doesn't make him perfect." Shota shrugged. He then smiled when Izuku looked at him with knitted eyebrows. "Midoriya, the measure of a good hero isn't how few mistakes you make or how few regrets you have."
The mug gently clinked as Shota set it down on the counter. He walked over to Izuku to gently clap a hand on his shoulder, and the boy looked up at him with big emerald eyes. "The measure of a good hero is how well you can bear the burden of your mistakes and regrets, and how you can make them right by doing better."
Izuku's forest-green eyes stared intently into Shota's face for several seconds as he articulated the solemn statement. Slowly, his head dropped until his chin dropped down against his chest.
"Yeah… I… I think I get it, Mr. Aizawa," he whispered with a small nod. Shota smiled and patted Izuku on the shoulder, then snagged a few of the animal crackers to pop them into his mouth. As he sauntered off toward his room, swirling the chamomile tea and crunching on the sweet cookies, he shoved a hand in the pocket of his pajama bottoms. After a few steps, he stopped and looked back at Izuku, who had gone back to staring blankly at the bowl of animal crackers.
"Midoriya, you still have a long way to go," Shota reminded him with an endeared smile. It was almost cute, how insanely ambitious his class of students was. Cute, but a headache and a handful sometimes when they got too intent on growing up too fast. "Take those feelings you have now, and use them to grow stronger."
Clarity flooded Izuku's dull eyes, returning that determined little gleam that Shota admired so much about the kid. He turned back to Shota with a bright smile.
"Yes, sir! Thank you, sir!"
"Great talk. Now, off to bed with you. I don't want to hear complaints that you're tired tomorrow."
"Of course, sir!"
Izuku went to scamper off, making Shota chuckle.
"Midoriya, your animal crackers?"
Izuku whirled on his socks to see his bowl of crackers still perched on the counter, untouched and forgotten.
"Oh, right! Th-thank you!" he laughed sheepishly and scurried back to retrieve his midnight snack. Shota watched warmly as he scampered off, munching on the animal crackers and muttering self-motivating blathers under his breath. Shota took a healthy swig of the chamomile tea; it blended with his improved mood to stimulate the drowsiness currently rising in his system. "Goodnight, Mr. Aizawa!" Izuku's hushed shout floated down the stairs several yards away. Shota snorted and turned to retreat back into the darkness of his bedroom.
"Sleep well, Midoriya. Pleasant dreams."
As Shota collapsed on his bed, the finished mug of chamomile tea resting on his nightstand, he actually felt secure for once that he'd be gifted with pleasant dream