Title: in bloom
Fandom: The Owl House
Genre: Found Family / Romance
Rating: K+
Full Summary: "By the time year nine rolled around, Amity could say with relief that her days of weirdness were far behind her and that she had perfect control over both herself and the way people saw her - even if they maybe viewed her as colder than she would like.

But that all changed when Luz the Human arrived.

It takes a little time, and a lot of soul-searching, but Amity eventually adapts to her new normal. Even if that means butterflies in her stomach and red faces and the ever-present thumping of her heart reacting to things she's never felt before.

The thing about Luz, though, is that no matter how prepared Amity thinks she is going into any interaction, she's usually proven wrong a few minutes later."

A little fic about stimming, self acceptance, and letting yourself be vulnerable.

Notes: Minor trigger warning for some self harming behavior stemming from repressing stims in this chapter, as well as hints of emotional abuse on the Blight parents' part. More notes at the end.


~.~

Chapter One

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When Amity was a witchling, she got in trouble often. And not for the normal reasons, like refusing to go to bed when she was supposed to (though she stayed up until the wee hours of the morning reading under her blanket most nights) or not eating her vegetables (though she absolutely hated the way boiled carrots felt inside of her mouth) or getting holes in her tights (she learned to mend them with magic after the first time she'd been yelled at). No, Amity got in trouble for different reasons as a small child.

It was the way she moved that seemed to be the problem. It wasn't the way other people, more respectable people, moved. When she was excited, it was almost as if another entity took control of her body, making her bounce in place. Her hands would flap wildly, like a baby bird first learning how to use its wings. The near-electric feeling of energy would take her body for a ride only for her to come back to herself a few moments later to her mother looking like she'd just sucked a lemon. Sometimes, when the world became too loud too fast too much, she would find herself rocking back and forth, a monotone hum bursting from her bitten-raw lips.

These things came naturally to Amity, much more naturally than sitting still in her chair during quiet time or looking people in the eye. But Amity was a fast learner. Eventually, she learned to curl her toes inside of her shoes instead of jumping up and down when she got excited and to bite the inside of her cheek when she got overwhelmed instead of humming. When the urge to flap her hands tried to take her over and she was around watching eyes, she'd knit her hands together instead, squeezing hard enough for her pristine fingernails to make little red crescents on her skin.

By the time year nine rolled around, Amity could say with relief that her days of weirdness were far behind her and that she had perfect control over both herself and the way people saw her—even if they maybe viewed her as colder than she would like.

But that all changed when Luz the Human arrived.

It takes a little time, and a lot of soul-searching, but Amity eventually adapts to her new normal. Even if that means butterflies in her stomach and red faces and the ever-present thumping of her heart reacting to things she's never felt before.

The thing about Luz, though, is that no matter how prepared Amity thinks she is going into any interaction, she's usually proven wrong a few minutes later.

...

It's been a few days since the impromptu Grudgby competition. They— Luz and Willow and Augustus and herself—are sitting underneath a tree near the field. Amity doesn't quite know how she got here, but Luz has her ways. Luz talks animatedly with Augustus—though about what, Amity isn't sure. Probably their shared classes. Amity is only half listening, somewhat distracted by the way Luz's brown eyes seem to shine even underneath the shade of the huge tree overhead.

But then Luz—Luz does the strangest thing. A smile blossoms on her face, bright and wide, and as it does her hands begin to flap.

Amity can't help but stare. She doesn't mean to, but she's never seen anyone else do it before, not in public. She tears her eyes away, looking down at her own hands—perfectly manicured and curled around her sandwich. When she looks up a moment later, she meets Willow's eye. Willow gives her an almost knowing look before going back to her own meal.

Amity doesn't say a word the rest of lunch, too consumed by her own thoughts to put together a single sentence. The rest of that day, as she finishes her coursework, she finds herself glancing at her hands every few minutes just to make sure they're doing what they're supposed to. A picture of Luz, so happy and free, plays in her head on repeat.

...

It happens again a few days later. Amity watches Luz pace back and forth in Edalyn Clawthorne's living room as she brainstorms on their shared project.

"You're gonna wear a hole in the floor pacing like that, you know," Edalyn says mildly from the kitchen. Amity stares as she walks into the room, pen in hand.

"Here you go," Eda says, handing Luz the pen. The cap is mottled, and Amity soon learns why as Luz absentmindedly takes the pen and puts it in her mouth, chewing vigorously.

"Don't get any ink on the carpet!" is Eda's throwaway line as she disappears back into the kitchen as though nothing happened at all. Bewildered, Amity continues staring at the doorway The Owl Lady left through, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

"Oh!" Luz shouts a few seconds later, making Amity jump, "Glitter!"

Amity forgets about the exchange in the moment, but later, when she lays in bed, she can't help but remember the fond way that Eda looked at Luz as she handed her the pen. Not a trace of anger.

The seed, sewn days before underneath that tree, begins to slowly sprout.

~.~


Author's Note:

Hi there! Welcome! This was pretty short. I was initially going to write a longer oneshot and post it all at once, but I've been sitting on this for a week or two and felt too excited to continue waiting! So this is a little multi-chapter fic. I won't be updating regularly because that never seems to work out for me but I will write more of it when the mood strikes. TOH is a huge hyperfixation of mine right now and I am SO excited to see an neurodivergent bi girl of color on a Disney show!

Regarding the tags - I do believe that Luz has a lot of autistic traits alongside her more obvious ADHD traits. She tends to repeat things that other people say a lot as a way of communicating and also has special interests. Its kind of hard to separate ADHD and autistic traits but I definitely thing that she shows signs of both in canon. Both her and Amity represent some of the many different ways in which autism can manifest, which I think is really cool! I am both autistic alongside having ADHD combined type in case anyone is wondering. :

Anyway! I will stop rambling right now. Please talk to me on tumblr astrovagant! I would talk TOH all day every day if I had more people to talk about it with! Keep in mind that astrovagant is a sideblog, though, so I would be following back from a different url.

Much love,
Aster