Author's Note: Vague content warning for emotional abuse and one's responses to it but it's mostly alluded here rather than depicted. There's some dissociation involved in the form of a shut down. The second scene of this chapter references a fic I posted recently titled "Warm Bodies". It probably isn't necessary to understand what's going on but y'all should check it out anyway b/c a) it's a short read and b) it is very Soft.
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Chapter Two
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It's crowded in the marketplace. Luz is buzzing with nervous energy, flitting around from stand to stand and speaking faster than Amity can keep up with. Amity regrets agreeing to come—crowds tend to make her nervous and jumpy for reasons she can't quite put her finger on. But it's Luzs first time out shopping for Eda since they escaped the petrification, and she hadn't been able to make herself say no when Luz had asked her to come for moral support.
But still. It's noisier than ever at the market, and Amity can't help but be on high alert—especially given who she's traveling with. She taps her fingers rhythmically against her bag and forces herself to breathe.
And it works, until someone knocks over a stand of produce and the irate worker begins yelling, her voice shrill and grating. Amity doesn't react outwardly. In fact, she doesn't react at all. Instead, she falls into the abyss. She barely notices when Luz speaks to her, though she can vaguely recall her own lips moving, or when Luz gently takes her hand and leads her away.
She isn't sure how much time has passed when she comes back to herself. They're in an alleyway somewhere, and Amity finds that it's much quieter than before. Luz is humming a slow and calming song, rocking softly, and they're both sitting on the ground. Normally, Amity might protest about being sat on the dirty stone. Instead, she takes in her surroundings. They sit there in silence a few more moments, allowing Amity time to gather herself.
"I'm sorry," Amity finally brings herself to say, the words coming like a foreign language to her lips, voice monotone.
"Hey," Luz says, "No need to apologize. I needed to get out of there myself. I'm sorry I didn't notice that you were uncomfortable sooner."
Amity can't bring herself to respond verbally. They sit there a few moments longer, Luz waiting patiently for Amity to gather herself and Amity trapped between feeling relief that she's in a safe space and shame that she needed a safe space to calm down to begin with.
Eventually, Amity stands, brushing the dirt off of her dress.
"You good?" Luz asks without judgment. Amity nods, still having trouble speaking and makes her way towards the alleyway's exit.
When they make their way back into the fray, Luz takes Amity's hand. In another situation, Amity would blush at this and maybe even snatch her hand away. But she's drained and tired and Luz's warm, soft hands feel like they're keeping her from floating away, so she doesn't.
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When Amity puts her foot in her mouth at Luz's sleepover, she's surprised to find that no one is really mad at her, per se. They're infuriatingly understanding, actually. It makes her heart hurt, just a little bit, realizing what she's been missing all these years in regards to friendship.
Willow had always been extremely nice to the point of being a bit of a doormat. Where Amity was all bite and sharp edges, Willow was softness and gentle words. It made them a perfect duo as kids, Willow's kindness tempering Amity's blunt way of speech. So when Amity had lost Willow on her seventh birthday, it took awhile for Amity to get her footing back.
See, the thing was that Amity wanted to be more like Willow all those years ago. She'd admired her sweet exterior, the careful way she chose her words. But she realized the day that she chased Willow away that she wasn't meant for such things.
Instead, she embraced the image her parents fabricated for her. She was the perfect child to the general public, with green hair like her mother's and the same cold and distant mask.
Until now, she'd never let herself think of what she was missing.
When Luz begins to slur her words, Amity takes the book away. Sleeping doesn't feel like an option, what with Eda about to find them sleeping in her nest at any minute. Nervous as Amity is, she can't bear to wake her sleeping friends. She reads aloud until she's sure Luz is asleep. Then, she lets herself admire her still form. She looks so peaceful in the moonlight.
She doesn't notice herself dozing off until Eda closes the bedroom door. Slightly groggy but still wary, she doesn't take her eyes off of her as she walks towards the nest.
"Room for one more?" Eda asks, lips quirked in a conspiratorial smile. Amity relaxes at this, then nods.
She doesn't fall back asleep until she's sure Eda is.
That night, she dreams of flying in the night, reaching for the moon like a moth to flame.
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Author's Note (2):
Look at me updating so soon after the first chapter. I'm truly amazed with myself. Don't have much to say here other than plugging my multifandom tumblr (which is mostly TOH) astrovagant. I originally made a strictly TOH blog but I was tired of having like ten different fandom specific blogs so here we are! Also, this chapter references my recent fic "Warm Bodies". Y'all should check it out. I didn't realize I love writing fluff and found family but now that I've done it once I have a Taste For It, as Gus would say. Send me neurodivergence and disability and fluff and found family prompts! Go wild!
Much love,
Aster