Coming Home

Hailey was standing outside of Jay's apartment, just staring at the door, debating whether she should knock or turn around and go home. She'd just gotten back from her assignment in New York, where she'd spent the last three weeks working with the FBI task force, solving one complex case after another. Voight had sent her there so she could get her head on straight; she'd crossed too many lines, which he claimed were quickly getting blurred to the point where she couldn't even see them anymore.

At first, Hailey had considered her temporary transfer as a punishment, a way to make amends for her wrongful actions. Part of her still firmly believed she'd done the right thing by planting cocaine in the trunk of a drug ring leader responsible for countless broken lives; the system had failed to throw a criminal behind bars, so she'd taken matters into her own hands. She was a strong woman, having gone through numerous battles, both on a personal and professional level. She wasn't afraid to fight for what she believed was right, and ultimately, her job was to make sure every single victim got the justice they deserved. But getting her hands dirty and putting her career in jeopardy to right a wrong had never been part of the plan. Deep down, she understood why Voight had made the decision to send her off to New York; the FBI was known for following the rules and doing everything by the book. Her sergeant wanted to reel her in, to pull her back from the dark shadows that had started to engulf her. Because he had faith in her… he trusted her. And the last thing Voight wanted was for her to go down the same path he'd taken; a path that had turned him into the ruthless cop he was today. And yet, despite all the times she'd butted heads with him over his decisions to handle certain cases his own way, she respected him. Behind his severe expression and stone-cold look was a man who cared a great deal about his detectives; each one of them was like a son or daughter. He'd moved heaven and earth to protect them… something not even her own father had done for her.

A tear rolled down Hailey's cheek and she hurriedly wiped it away with the back of her hand. Yes; coming here to see Jay was exactly what she needed. The last three weeks had provided her all the time in the world to reflect on her life and where she wanted to go next; talking to Jay was the first step to making that happen. She took a deep breath and softly knocked on the door. She bent her head down, nervously staring at the floor as she waited. After a brief moment that somehow felt like an eternity, she heard footsteps inside the apartment and the bolt slide.

"Hailey!" Jay said, a large grin immediately spreading across his lips as soon as he opened the door.

"Hey" she replied, smiling back at him.

"When did you get back?"

"Tonight… I dropped off my bags and came straight here" she told him, feeling herself blush.

Jay's smile faded slightly, but he hadn't taken his eyes off her.

"I, uh… I was thinking I could cash in that Bartoli's offer" she said, breaking the awkward silence.

"Sure, I'm always down for some deep dish pizza! Let me just grab my jacket and we'll go."

"Actually, I was thinking maybe we could just order in" she blurted out before he could go back inside his apartment. "I mean, if that's ok with you" she quickly added.

"Yeah, of course" he answered in a soft voice. "Come in" he told her, moving to the side to let her in.

She made her way inside as Jay closed the door behind her. She hadn't been to his apartment in a while, but everything still looked exactly the same; the worn out dark brown leather couch and dusty coffee table, the grey walls devoid of any picture frames or artwork.

"I really love what you've done with the place" she said jokingly, hoping it would help cut the odd tension between them, probably a result of not seeing each other for more than the usual couple of days.

"Haha, thanks" he laughed. "I know, it could definitely use a woman's touch…" he added with a smile, only intensifying the fluttering of butterflies in her stomach.

She smiled back at him, not knowing what to say. She'd rehearsed different scenarios on the drive over to his place, but none of them had her feeling this nervous. Jay was her partner, her friend… why was it so difficult for her to open up and be honest with him?

"So how was New York?" he asked, breaking the ice for her.

"It was… different" she responded, making every effort to steady her voice.

"Good different or bad different?"

"Just… different. It's definitely not Chicago."

"Well, I know that…" he replied. "So would you ever consider moving there permanently?" he asked after a moment.

"I'm not saying never… but for now, my life is here."

Jay nodded, his eyes transfixed on hers. His mood had considerably changed, and she knew exactly why. He'd lost a partner before, in these exact circumstances.

"You do know this was only a temporary thing, right?" she said, trying to reassure him. "I'm not leaving Intelligence."

"No, I know… it's just… this came out of nowhere. I showed up for work one day and you were gone" he said in a low tone of voice.

"I know, and I'm sorry. It was a last-minute decision and I barely had enough time to get my stuff together. I should've called to let you know where I was going, and I do want to apologize for leaving you in the dark. But Jay… I'm not Erin" she said, slowly moving towards him.

He was definitely surprised by her words, because she noticed tears forming in his bright green eyes. He remained silent for a moment, trying to regain his composure.

"I know that… you're very different" he replied, walking closer.

"Good different or bad different?" she asked, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

"What do you think?" he responded, his voice a mere whisper.

He was only a few inches away from her now, so close she could smell the sweet, intoxicating scent of his cologne. She suddenly felt light-headed; not because she was ill, but because she was so drawn to him… like a moth to a flame. He was gazing into her eyes, perhaps looking for an answer to his question, but probably just trying to figure out if she'd let him do what they'd both silently been dreaming about for years. His gaze slowly moved to her lips as he bent his head down towards hers. She could practically feel the warmth of his mouth on hers when she heard her cellphone make a buzzing sound.

"I'm sorry" she blurted out, reaching for her cellphone in the pocket of her jacket.

Jay moved backwards, visibly disappointed by the untimely interruption.

"It's Voight… he wants to see me first thing in the morning to go over my time in New York."

Hailey turned off her phone and put it back in her pocket, lifting her head to look back at Jay. He was leaning against the back of the couch with his arms crossed, staring at her. Again, she didn't know what to say. They'd come so close to finally letting their bodies admit what their hearts already knew… but the awkwardness had reared its ugly head again.

"Why did you come here, Hailey? And please don't say you just stopped by for some pizza…" he told her.

This was her chance to let Jay know how she felt… to show him just how deeply she cared about him.

"You're right… I'm not even hungry" she confessed, slowly walking back towards him. "I spent the last three weeks alone with my thoughts… night after night, thinking about where I am… and where I want to be. I came here because I don't want to be alone tonight… or any other night."

She stopped in front of him and placed her hands on his chest. He responded by wrapping his arms around her waist. Slowly, she leaned in and kissed him. Jay's lips were so much softer than she'd imagined, but she wasn't surprised by just how perfectly they fit with hers; like connecting pieces of a puzzle. She let herself drown in his embrace as he tenderly tightened his arms around her. Surrendering to him felt incredible… natural.

"Hailey" he whispered, momentarily breaking their kiss and pressing his forehead against hers. "As much as I missed you while you were gone, I never for a second doubted that you'd come back home… to me."

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be" she murmured before she drew him in again.