He hated this. Hated the fact that this was happening. Hated the fact he flinched every time Harry touched him.
Faustina didn't. At least not when it was the family touching her. What type of bullshit was that?
Why? Why was he so okay with touching Harry? But then the minute Harry touched him, he tensed and winced. It was so frustrating.
Today sucked.
He'd always viewed himself as a fair person. For the most part a sincere one. A caring one. But today? Today had been a day of self-reflection. And he wasn't liking what he was discovering.
He was such a blind fucking hypocrite.
He didn't even know actions could be hypocritical, but he'd somehow managed to pull it off. It fucking sucked. It fucking hurt. And it was fucking aggravating.
He knew he needed to get over this. That it was dangerous and stupid as fuck not to. That it had nearly gotten him killed. Captured twice on the same fucking day.
He knew Harry wouldn't hurt him. Fluster, confuse and embarrass him, sure, but never hurt.
Yet here he was, glaring from the corner he'd backed himself into.
He wasn't even sure why the light touches he knew had been coming were bothering him so much.
"Hey now, it be ah bein' okay." Harry holds his hands up, "Be ah takin' ah breath."
"Bite me." He snaps.
"That don'nah be soundin' like light touchin'" Harry points out with a small smile, "But if ya be insistin'." He shrugs, but notably doesn't move or lower his hands.
"This is fucking stupid." He growls as he runs a hand through his hair in agitation. "Can't we just work on my reflexes instead?" God let that not have been as whiny as it sounded.
Harry bites his lip, "If that really be what ya be ah wantin'." He slowly offers as he takes a small step closer, "But T, we both be ah knowin' this were'nah gonna be easy."
He crosses his arms as he looks away. "Yeah, I fuckin' see that."
"We can be ah failin' as many times as it be ah takin' ta get it right."
He can feel his jaw tighten as he clenches his teeth. How the fuck had this even happened? When the fuck did it start? He remembered so much- But he couldn't remember that? He growls in annoyance as he shoves his hand through his hair again. He knew on a level Harry was right. Knew that running around on the isle, especially with the shit they were doing, that it was dangerous. He takes a deep breath before he slaps his hand to his face and drags it down with a resigned groan. "How the fuck is being touched supposed to reverse me freezing by being touched. It's fuckin' stupid."
"How did Deez be ah gettin' o'er her fear o' the water?" Harry shrugs, "I know it ain'nah bein' the same, but it be workin' for one, we can be ah hopin' it be workin' for the other."
He lets his head fall back as he glares at the ceiling. Damn it. He scowls before he turns back to Harry. "I loathe the fact you're right."
"Aye, I can be ah livin' with that." Harry smiles at him before he takes the last few steps separating them, "I can be ah livin' with ah lot o' things if it be ah meanin' ya can be ah beatin' this."
He takes a deep breath even as he steps away, the wood pressing against his back.
"I ain'nah gonna touch ya 'til ya be ah gettin' calm again." Harry reminds him, still keeping his hands at eye level. "Ya be rememberin'? Ya gotta be full calm."
He sighs as he drops his head, closing his eyes as he focuses on his breathing. On how rapid his heart was pounding against his chest. This was so fucking stupid. He could take a hit for days. He could touch others with no problem. What the fuck was his hold up with this? He wipes his hands on his pants when he feels them slick with sweat.
When had he become such a hypocrite? Once his heartbeat returns to a steady pace he looks up. "I'm good."
Harry nods before he slowly moves one hand, hooking his hand with a single finger. With the other hand he trails a finger across his arm.
Every flinch makes Harry pause. And there were a lot of them. At one point he couldn't even tell if he was flinching from the contact, or in frustration with himself.
"It be okay, we already be ah holdin' out longer." Harry whispers before he feels hands on his shoulders.
He frowns, this was fucking stupid. Why couldn't he just fucking relax? What the fuck? He thought he'd gotten better with this.
"T?" Harry's concern breaks through his self-loathing.
He looks up meeting pale blue eyes. "Sup?"
"Do you trust me?" Harry asks.
No hurt. No anger. No betrayal. Just a question.
"Yeah." He tilts his head to the side. He did right?
Harry smiles before he sweeps him off his feet, "Aye," He pecks a quick kiss to his temple, "cause I be ah thinkin' I be ah seein' the problem."
"Kay, couple of things. The first of which is put me down. Two, what the fuck are you thinking? Your chest is cut up as shit-"
"Shh, I be ah forgettin' 'til I be ah pickin' ya up, best ta just be ah gettin' me point across first."
He looks up at him with a frown, "Great, what the fuck is it?"
"If I be ah holdin' ya like this-" Harry's arms and chest suddenly tense around him, "-and be ah sayin' I were relaxed would ya be ah believin' me?"
He tilts his head to the side. "No?"
"Oh good, it ain'nah just bein' me then." Harry grins before he sits down in the middle of the floor with a grimace, "Cause that be what ya be ah doin'."
He rolls his eyes, "I'm always like this."
"I be thinkin' that may be ah bein' the problem."
He scowls. "I'm fuckin' trying."
"I be ah knowin' T." Harry winces as he adjusts, "But what can yours truly be ah doin' ta be ah helpin' ya loosen up?"
"Can you not?" He glares. "Just let me go before you open something back up."
"Shh." Harry rolls his eyes, "Just be ah answerin' me."
Great. He'd never really thought about how to relax before. He was sure he'd relaxed at some point though. But how? When? And why? He looks up and stares blankly at the ceiling. He'd relaxed when he found out Harry was okay, but that wasn't ever something he wanted to replicate. He narrows his eyes.
He's taken off guard when Harry's lips are on his. He tenses at the sudden contact, the familiar scent of clove filling his nose before he kisses him back. He blinks. When the fuck had that become a reflex? He pulls back as he looks at Harry.
"I be ah takin' ah chance on that," Harry admits before a slow, mischievous grin takes over his lips, "But ya did be ah relaxin' ah wee bit."
He blushes, as he looks away. "No I didn't."
"Ya really gonna be ah actin' ah brat 'bout this?" Harry chuckles.
"Oh, fuckin' bite me." He snaps before he jumps at the slight sting on his shoulder. He turns back just in time to see Harry's grin backing away, "You- you bit me! You ass!"
"Ya only be ah havin' yerself ta be ah blamin' here." Harry shakes his head, "I be ah thinkin' I be ah very bad pirate for not takin' ya up on the offer the last gillion times ya be ah offerin'."
"Gillion isn't a number." T huffs, "And they weren't offers."
"Well, ya be ah sayin' it so many times I don'nah be ah havin' ah number for it." Harry chuckles.
He rolls his eyes, "Who's the brat now."
"That ah be you." Harry smiles before he snaps his teeth together.
"Whatever you have to tell yourself." He shakes his head. "But between the two of us, it's definitely you."
"Well ya be ah wantin' to know somethin'?" Harry accents each word with a head tilt and bob, thoroughly challenging him.
He looks up, unable to help his curiosity.
He watches as Harry picks up one of his hands and lets it fall.
"Okay?"
Harry chuckles before he does it again, "I think I be ah figurin' out yer happy place."
He tilts his head to the side, before his eyes narrow at his arm. "Huh."
"Kissin' an' banterin'... Huh indeed."
"It had nothing to do with kissing." He grumbles ignoring the way his ears burn. Right?
"Well that be ah bein' too bad." Harry sighs, "I were lookin' forward ta that."
"Of course you were." He rolls his eyes. "Sorry to disappoint."
"Aye." Harry slowly shakes his head, "Guess I be ah havin' ta be askin' for 'em as yer punishment."
"Punishment?" He tilts his head to the side, "For what?"
"I knew ya be ah forgettin' that." Harry chuckles, "Ya be rememberin' when ya be ah takin' off without me and I be ah havin' ta come find ya?"
He stiffens, "Oh yeah…"
"Aye." Harry nods, "Ya did'nah be ah tellin' me what it should be ah bein', so now I be ah choosin'."
He frowns, "Seriously?" He tilts his head to the side.
A wicked grin lights up Harry's face, "Aye. Ya be ah havin' ta be kissin' me, anytime I be ah-" He taps a finger to his lips.
"Tch," He scoffs. That wasn't a real punishment. Real punishments were painful. Not embarrassing. This was straight extortion.
Harry clears his throat, "I believe I be ah doin' it."
"So I noticed." He rolls his eyes before he leans up and pecks his lips quickly. "There, happy?"
"Aye." Harry chuckles as he holds him closer and starts rubbing his arm again.
He drops his eyes to his arm, watching Harry's hand curiously. When the fuck had he started doing that? And why hadn't he noticed? He tilts his head to the side.
"How that be fer ah experiment?" Harry chuckles when he looks back up.
He opens his mouth before he shuts it, "A clever one I guess…"
"I be ah havin' clever moments." Harry grins before he taps his lips.
"Shame they're so rare." He teases as he leans up to give him another kiss.
"Says you." Harry snickers against T's lips. He deepens the kiss briefly before pulling away, "But I be ah feelin' pretty damn clever right now."
"I said they were rare- Not impossible."
"Shh." Harry shakes his head, "Ya be ah ruinin' me rare moment."
"Kinda my thing- Your head's big enough as it is without compliments."
"But ya can'nah be arguin' me results."
He sighs in defeat before he leans up and kisses Harry's neck. "Rare."
"Ya can'nah just be givin' me this, can ya?"
"I refuse." He chuckles into the crook of Harry's neck before he leans his head against his shoulder and sighs as tries to pull away. He frowns when he can't do more than move away from Harry's shoulder.
"It be ah takin' time." Harry whispers before he feels lips press against the top of his head.
"I know," He sighs in disappointment. "Nothing is ever that easy," he pouts as his head falls back.
But still, it didn't make it any less frustrating. He frowns, biting his lip before he leans his head back against Harry's shoulder. Racking his brain for when this started. He had to be missing something, right? But he couldn't come up with jack shit. He tilts his head to the side as his eyes narrow. Which only left a few possibilities.
"Ya ain'nah relaxin' no more." Harry's brow furrows, "What ya be thinkin'?"
He frowns, "I just-" He chews his lip. "I'm not sure." He sighs, "But- I think this started before I existed…"
"Which be ah meanin' I be needin' ta be ah doin' this with you an' Faustina?"
He sighs, "Story of your life right?"
"Did ya be ah hearin' ah complaint in me voice?" Harry chuckles as he shakes his head, "Ya better not ah been, cause there were'nah one."
He looks up to study Harry with a frown, "Seriously? How are you not annoyed as fuck with it? You have enough shit to deal with without adding our fucking problems to your list. All of you are already doing more than enough for us, especially you. I almost got you fuckin' ki-"
"Ya be gettin' fuckin' silly." Harry interrupts with a finger to his lips, "I be lovin' ya, both you an' Faustina. I don'nah be needin' ta be understandin' the whole situation ta be ah knowin' it. Sure, it be ah little hard ta be ah wrappin' me mind around at times, but I be ah lovin' all o' it." He kisses his forehead, "An' when ya be ah lovin' someone, ya don'nah be wantin' them ta be facin' their problems alone. I would think ya be knowin' that, Mr. I can'nah be ah lettin' none I be ah carin' for be facin' shit on their own."
He hangs his head back. Jesus fucking christ. He groans. Yet another tick in the hypocrite box. Wonderful. Why? When did he get his head this far up his own ass? Always. That was the obvious answer. Why the fuck did he ever think he was fair? How obnoxious was he really?
Harry's chuckle draws him back.
"Don'nah be lookin' so serious." Harry teases as he nuzzles against his hair, "It be ah lesson we all be ah havin' ta learn. You an' Deez still be ah learnin' it."
He takes a deep breath before he lets it out in a huff. "I'll add it to the list."
Harry chuckles again, "For someone who be ah likin' ta learn, ya sure be ah gettin' huffy o'er it."
"It's turned into a long list." He grumbles.
"Oh has it now?" Harry teases before he yawns.
"Yeah, and most of it's fucking social."
"Sounds like it be ah good thing ya be ah havin' ah family ta be ah helpin' ya."
T reaches up and pats his cheek, not sure if Harry was being ironic or not. If it weren't for the family he wouldn't be having to learn it in the first place. "You sound tired. And, we made progress," Not a lot, but some. "You should go head up to your room and crash. You need to heal."
"Don'nah be sellin' yerself short." Harry winks down at him, "I be feeling like we be accomplishin' loads." He taps a finger to his lips.
He shakes his head in amusement before he tilts his head up and kisses him, nipping his lip.
Harry chuckles before he yawns widely. "Ah man, now ya be ah mentioning it, I do be ah feelin' tired." He grins as he snuggles against him, "I don'nah even be thinkin' I can be ah makin' it back ta the cabin."
Before he can argue he finds himself laying on the floor with Harry's arms wrapped around him.
"Hook, I doubt sleepin' on the floor is the best thing for your injuries." He sighs. "So find some damn energy and go to your room or at the very least move to the nest."
"I be ah hearin' hammock?"
"Sure, that too."
"Well then, I just be ah takin' me things an' goin' ta me hammock." Harry grunts as he slowly stands with him in his arms.
"I am not a thing Hook."
"Me apologies." Harry chuckles before his smile widens.
"That means down, Hook."
"Why? I be ah sayin' sorry for ah callin' ya ah thing." Harry explains as he works to open the door, "An' 'sides, ya be ah finally admittin' ya be mine."
"So? And lots of reasons, most important of which is you're fucking injured, and I'll kill you if you try carrying me across deck."
Harry beams at him, obviously forgetting about the door, "Ya really ain'nah gonna be ah tryin' ta take it back?"
"No, pretty sure I'll kill you."
"Aye, I be ah knowin' that," Harry rolls his eyes before he sighs, "Ya be ah doin' this ah' purpose just ta be ah gettin' ah rise outta me."
He frowns as his head tilts to the side. "It is fun getting a rise outta you."
Harry narrows his eyes, "So, ya be ah knowin' ya be mine then?"
"Aren't we all supposed to be each others' or something like that?"
"Ah-Aye." Harry nods, "We all do be ah bein' belongin' ta each other." He smiles, "So-" He sets him down gently on his feet, "All kiddin' be ah'side, ya be ah wantin' some time ta yerself?"
He nods, "No offense, but I'm not tired."
"Ya ain'nah be offendin' me none. I be ah gettin' it. Ya be like the Sweet Boy and Baby Girl, needin' space when ya be ah needin' it." He snaps fingers from both hands, "Yet another example o' how I can be ah learnin' and listenin'." He grins.
He rolls his eyes, but can't help his smile. He unlocks the door before he carefully pushes Harry out of his room, wary of his injuries. "Night Hook."
"Night Love."
He shuts the door on Harry's face before he presses his back to it and slides to the floor. He pulls his legs to his chest and wraps his arms around them before he props his chin on his knees.
He lets out a long-suffering sigh.
He had so much to work on if he was ever going to fit in with the other four. So much to learn. It was fucking overwhelming.
S'up Fam!
So, looks like they are making some progress.
Side note, if you're confused, T always flinches. We wrote about it a lot when this book started but It seemed redundant to say it every time someone touches him, mainly the family since why would anyone else on that shit heap do that, ignores the wincing flinch. So yeah, if that took you off guard or confused you- Please let us know. It'll be important for when we're writing our original story.
That being said…
What did you guys think of this chapter?
T's right back to that self-loathing, but at least it's a more helpful version of it, if there is such a thing…
Harry was super sweet and patient in this chapter, not that he isn't usually. It's just not usually so overt.
What did you think of their interaction?
Oh and that punishment? I know that some of you have been waiting for it.
Which side of the fence are you on?
Extortion or Penalty?
Either way hope ya'll enjoyed the chapter.
Looking forward to seeing you guys on Friday.
Oh! and for anyone who's interested, we have some boss ass fan art made by Dobby, Wolf Girl and myself of Siren's Song (Uma's sword), and the crew's tattoos on our Facebook page.
If your interested hit us up on Facebook, DarkandTwistedSisters
We're going to be posting updates and when it rolls around to it, pics of the dresses.
Much love and appreciation
-Twisted