Castiel.

That was the name Jack had told me. That was the name people kept telling me and that I kept hearing. I was supposed to know him. I was supposed to love him. The me that I was when I remembered had loved him and had cared for him. Supposedly, he had felt the same.

As I looked into the eyes of this other Castiel, I could clearly see that those feelings didn't exist. He approached me calmly, keeping an eye on my movements. For all the pain I was in, I was smart enough to keep myself still.

"Hello, Ass-stiel." I greeted coldly. He offered me an empty smile in response.

"Hello, Kylie." The way he said my name… It was accented and weird. I felt as though I was being personally violated by his words alone. "We've been studying you."

"That makes you sound really creepy." I pointed out. He ignored me, reaching to squeeze my arm. I tried to jerk back from it on instinct. When he touched me, I could… I could feel the tiniest bit of something flow from him into me, then back again. He pulled his hand away, a frown on his face.

"Curious." He stated. His entire demeanor was as accented and precisely clipped as his words. "I feel myself within you, but as a distant echo. Whatever was there is long gone now."

"I sincerely hope you understand how creepy you sound right now."

"I wish to experiment a little on you." He continued, reaching into his coat. He pulled out something I didn't recognize, but from the sound Ketch made I was certain he did. It was metal, rounded, with a flat strip of leather leading from the metal to a small handle at the end. It looked like something that was supposed to choke me to death. "Considering how the bags worked, and your abilities, I am confident that this will work as well."

"What is that?" I couldn't help but ask. I was curious.

"Your friend behind you seems to recognize it well, but it's strange that you do not. I would think one of your kind would be quite familiar with this device." He opened the circular metal part as he spoke, eyeing my neck in a way that made me feel sick. "This, my dear," he clasped the metal around my neck, keeping a firm hold of the leather on his end. "Is called a witch-catcher."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Stay exactly and immaculately still." Castiel ordered. I tried to roll my eyes at him, but couldn't. I tried to open my mouth and speak, but I couldn't. Castiel just smiled that same hollow smile. "Remove her bindings." He ordered the angels. "I wish to test this further."

I could barely see the others in my peripherals as they unbound me. Once I was freed I tried to get up and fight, but… I couldn't. I was stuck, frozen, in the chair.

"Stand up." Castiel ordered. I felt my body move against my will, forcing me into a rigid standing position. "Jump." I jumped once, landing in that same still stance. "Tell me your name."

"Kylie Dillinger." The words came uninhibited. I wanted to look back at Ketch, to have him tell me what was happening, but I couldn't move.

"Good." Castiel stated. "Now, a test of your skills. I wish for you to open a portal to the other world."

I did nothing. My hands didn't move, I didn't move, I just stayed still. Castiel looked at me with annoyance.

"Answer my questions truthfully – can you open a portal?"

"No."

"Then how did you come through to here?"

"I don't -" I was about to finish the sentence when I felt lightning strike my brain. I fell to the ground, clutching my head. "I don't," as I spoke it happened again, causing me to cry out in pain.

"Curious." Castiel muttered. "How did you come to this universe?"

"I…" Another crack. Another cry. "I…" Another. "I…"

I heard screaming. It wasn't my voice. I heard Jack talking. I couldn't make out the words. I could feel like I was supposed to be seeing something, but I couldn't do it. It was right there in front of me, but I couldn't quite get at it. It was painful to not. It was more painful to try.

"I don't understand how!" I shouted. "I felt it and my head hurt and I came!" After I spoke, I felt my pain start to recede. I opened my eyes, and looked up at Castiel.

"Interesting." He commented. "You have head pain in correlation to these portals opening?"

"Yes."

"You are connected to them."

"Yes."

"Do you know how?"

"No."

"Hmmm…" He pondered on this. "What kind of witch are you?"

"Natural-born." As I answered, I felt my head scream once more. I was still on the ground, and I wanted to reach up and grasp at the pain I felt. I couldn't force my arms to do it, though. They were still bound by the command of the witch-catcher.

"You don't remember much of your past, correct?"

"Yes."

"Tell me what you remember." At the request, I rattled off the few memories I'd gained back. Dogs howling with someone on the phone. Comfortability with angelic blades. A few other things. Not much. Nothing that would help. Talking about these things didn't hurt as much.

"What do you suppose would happen if I forced you to remember more?" He posed once I was done. I was forced to answer that again.

"I'd die." That was an answer I was certain of, but the automatism in which I'd responded scared me. I knew.

"What if I assisted you myself?" He posed. "I've felt my own magic within you, even though it's an echo." He thought after a moment. "Do you know me?"

"No."

"Do you know the me from the other universe?"

"I'm supposed to, but I don't remember." That was truth. That was pure truth, not forcing me to remember anything. I was thankful for that.

"Curious." He said again. "Can you still use magic?"

"Yes."

"Can you control it?"

"Sometimes."

"How?"

"Reaction." I tried to fight, but another word forced its way through. "Intent." I felt my head crack sharply again for a moment, but no memory came to mind.

"Where did you send your third partner?"

"I sent her to safety." I tried to keep my mouth shut, but I felt myself speaking without a way to stop. "A few miles outside of one of the encampments."

"Which one?"

"I… I…" I felt my body starting to heat up as I fought against the question. "I…"

"Which encampment?" Castiel asked again, his voice more insistent.

"I…"

"Kylie, don't!" Ketch shouted. "Fight it!"

"Silence him." Castiel ordered the angels, but he was still holding the reign on me. I turned automatically, aiming a hand out at Ketch. My brain felt like it was frying, but I could feel the intent of the power as I thought about Ketch's neck. He started to gasp, looking at me with panic and fear. Nobody else spoke or moved as I choked the man with my magic. He wasn't dying, just being forced to stay silent.

He was choking. He was being kept on the brink of choking to death by me.

I wanted to bring my hand down. I wanted to stop. I wanted to stop all of this and die now, be it from remembering everything or from fighting the witch catcher in answering, but I couldn't.

"You killed my friends." I was in another memory. I could see Ketch sitting across from me, but he kept flickering from one at a table to the one in chains. I felt like I recognized this. I had a different part of this memory, I was certain of it. "You killed my family. You came in promising peace and instead tried to wipe us out. So yeah, I think I can safely call that bad. I think I can say that you're a cruel man, and that my only wish was that I could be there when you died, if only to draw it out a little longer." I could feel an idea, in my mind. I wanted to hold out a hand in that memory and just…

Just close his goddamn throat.

I wanted to kill him.

I wanted to use magic and murder him, and I wouldn't have given a damn afterwards. I would've even smiled.

I blinked, and I was out of the memory. I was in the present. I was still choking Ketch. My arm was trembling. Everyone was standing around, watching me with curiosity. Ketch was struggling, making noises of pain and fear under the power of my own magic. If I was ordered to – or if I wanted to – I could close my hand right now and kill him. It would be over, just like that.

Just like I'd wanted in that memory.

I felt myself shed a few unwilling tears as I finally whispered an answer to Castiel. "Base Camp. Sioux Falls. Bobby's Shop."

"Stop." Castiel ordered me. I lowered my arm, but I was stuck standing still. My brain was screaming inside, but I couldn't move any more. I was stuck exactly as I was, unable to control myself. I watched Ketch with horrified and terrified eyes. He stopped struggling, taking in deep breaths. I could hear a slight rasp in his voice as he pushed air back into his lungs.

I felt absolute dread as I looked at what I'd just done.

This was it.

This was how they won.

This would be how they killed me.

Mary had said that Ketch made people into monsters, that he'd wanted to kill me because he was a monster and I was good.

But I was the monster all along. Only a monster would remember wanting to do what I'd just done; wanting to kill someone and watch them struggle in pain and fear.

The angels were monsters, and this was how they would make me - no, expose me - as a monster like them.

"I believe this will become quite a turning point in human history." Castiel commented behind me. "I'd like to see more of what you can do."

I felt more tears fall, and met Ketch's eyes. He was scared, too; not for himself or for the battle, but for what I would be forced to do – what he and the others would be forced to watch me do. I wished I could apologize and say something, but I couldn't. I didn't think the apology would matter anyways.

He had been right. He had been right all along. I was just another monster that needed to be killed.

We maintained eye contact up until the lights went off.

"Secure the area!" One of the angel shouted.

"Witch, come with me." Castiel ordered. I looked at Ketch one last time, hoping he could see me through the darkness before my feet forced me to turn around. As we went outside to a vehicle I could hear the sounds of angels screaming behind me. Castiel turned, and I saw the bright light of a dying angel reflected in his eyes. "Torch the building." He ordered.

For a moment, I remembered what Ketch had told me. I'd promised I'd burn him.

I turned, fighting the movement with everything I had but unable to stop. My brain screamed in pain and misery as I moved. It hurt before I could even cast a spell. I raised a hand, but the power felt… blocked. I couldn't exactly make it happen.

"What are you waiting for? Do it!" Castiel ordered.

"No." Another voice commanded from the side. It sounded familiar, the same as Castiel's but different. I stood frozen, facing the gas station and unable to do anything.

"DO IT!" Castiel screamed. I felt something inside me push, trying to get the power out of me and complete the command, but something even stronger was blocking it.

Something even stronger made it bounce back. I screamed, feeling my body boil on the inside as the metal collar melted around my neck. I heard a noise behind me, and felt my neck being jerked sideways slightly before I had control over myself. I clawed at my neck in pain, still screaming. I heard talking behind me, but I couldn't focus on that. All I could focus on was the metal around my neck melting; the feeling of my skin searing and my blood boiling as though I was on fire myself. Someone screamed behind me, and I felt external heat on my back. Moments later, someone placed a hand on my neck.

The pain reached a crescendo as the stranger did something. It was so much all at once, so much battling around inside me. I couldn't take it all. I couldn't handle it.

I passed out, still screaming.