Notes: Please read the tags. This fic will eventually have a happy ending, but not for awhile. It is very graphic. I do not condone any actions that take place in this, it is purely writing. Thank you to my beta reader. If you love Gavin this is not the fic for you, I'm sorry but he is the bad guy in this.
Tw: Rape, Andriod Gore, Character Death, General Unpleasantness
Chapter 1:
When he pulled the trigger everything disappeared, he felt himself drift through a black nothingness, the world grew more and more muffled as his systems shutdown. Time had stopped for him and he found himself contemplating every action that had led him to this point. To his dismay he realized it had been largely inaction that got him here. The deeper he sunk the darker things got and with that his list of regrets grew. He had failed himself, his friends, and most importantly, Jericho. Under his leadership things had rotted and would've continued to had Markus not shown up. Markus. He wished he had told him how he'd felt. His thoughts slowed to a crawl as his feelings turned to numbness, before they stopped completely.
Simon's eyes fluttered open and he realized that death...wasn't exactly what he had expected it to be; in all honesty, it wasn't anything like he'd expected. When he'd shot himself he thought that'd be it. That there'd be nothing, at least nothing for him, he was an android after all. He hadn't dared to hope that there'd be something for him, but as it turns out, there was. To his relief, sentience meant having a soul, and that was enough to get you to the afterlife.
He'd woken in a lush green forest, not far from a cabin. New, unfamiliar sensations quickly overwhelmed his already confused mind. The grass beneath him, he felt it, at least he thought he did. A cool breath caressed his skin, he thought he could taste the air as he stood. He couldn't help but smile softly, fascinated by these new feelings. Overall, it was...pleasant. He liked it. This wide array of sensation was something he never thought would be possible for him Before Simon knew it he had arrived at the cabin's entrance. He hadn't even been aware he was walking, too caught up in these new feelings.
The door opened before Simon could even touch it, he entered the cabin with less hesitance than he'd expect of himself. Strangely enough he felt safer than he ever had in his entire life. The sensations that greeted him here were different, but pleasant all the same. Simon felt warmth, a cozy sensation that wrapped around him like a blanket. The air here tasted different too, he had no idea how to describe it. He liked these new sensations a lot.
Simon was caught off guard by a giggle. When he looked ahead he was met with a familiar sight, Lucy stood before him. At least he thought it was Lucy, she looked different. Her body had been completely repaired, her eyes a warm brown instead of the familiar black. She was dressed in a beautiful white gown with sky blue lace around the waist.
"Simon," Lucy's voice was softer than he remembered and fully repaired, "It's so good to see you."
Her smile was bittersweet, "I'm sure you have questions." she gestured for him to sit
"Where am I?" he questioned when he was comfortable," I died-Wait you died? I thought-"
"That there'd be nothing?" Lucy finished, also choosing to sit
Simon nodded, bewildered as he shifted in his seat.
"This is real?" he looked around anxiously," I'm really here with you?" he trailed off, still unsure where here was.
"Yes," she confirmed," This is real."
Rather than respond, Simon chose to stare at the fireplace behind Lucy. He was fixated on the twirling and twisting flames before him. He flinched when Lucy's hand found his, Simon's attention snapped back to her.
"We'll be going our separate ways soon."
Separate ways? But he just got here where would-
"I wish you could sta-"
"Why can't I?" he cut her off as his anxiety rose
"That's not in your plan," Her gaze was solemn," you can be brought back, and will be, I can't." she finished sadly
"What do you mean?" Simon's voice strained as his stress grew. Everything around him was fading, no he was fading.
Lucy shook her head, "There's not enough time," She squeezed his hand
"Simon."
He could barely focus as he lost sensation, Lucy grabbed at him desperately.
"Don't lose yourself."
He faded away completely.
With a jolt Simon woke, "It's dark. Where...where am I?", he felt like he was dangling.
"I reactivated you so you could help me." a voice said," I must find Jericho."
"I don't recognize your voice, you're not one of us," he said defensively, "I'll never tell you where Jericho is. Now leave me alone."
Simon forced himself into standby without another word, angry and confused at this new turn of evidence. The feelings of safety were long gone, and worse, his sight.
He woke again when he sensed movement in front of him, unsure how long he'd been out. His internal clock wasn't working, as well as most of his systems.
"Who's there?" he searched around blindly, desperately wishing he could see," Who are you?"
"Everything is alright," he heard Markus say," Don't worry."
"Markus? Is that you?" he felt joy and relief, "Why did you leave me?" and then anger and hurt.
"I had no choice, they'd have killed us all!" Markus hastily said, "You'll be alright...I came to take you home."
Happiness flooded Simon's chest, Markus had come back for him. Markus was going to take him home!
"Just...give me the location to Jericho," Markus paused, he sounded stressed, "We've got to leave now."
"Jericho," Something about this was odd, Simon couldn't quite place it. Everything was so overwhelming, "Y-yes...yes, of course."
Markus grabbed his arm to interface and Simon hurriedly gave him the information. He just wanted to go home. Markus pulled away and Simon frantically grabbed for him.
"Markus? Is that you Markus?" his fear grew when there was no response, "Don't leave me again Markus. Don't leave!" he shouted
When his systems shut off again, he felt betrayed, and then nothing.
Simon's body jerked back to life, this time he was more angry than confused. His position had changed, he was sitting on what felt like the ground and his hands were cuffed behind his back.
"Markus? You shut me off! Why?" Simon demanded.
His thirium pump stuttered when he was greeted by someone who definitely wasn't Markus, he didn't recognize this voice either.
"Mindfucking you like that was cruel, even for the tincan."
"What? Where's Markus?" Simon insisted, "What'd you do to him?"
"Markus was never here," he could practically hear the man smiling, "Connor tricked you."
Connor...the name was familiar, that was the Deviant Hunter wasn't it? But that means…
"N-no…" Simon couldn't stop himself from saying, "But I...Jericho-"
"Is currently being raided thanks to you."
Simon shook his head in distress, his stress levels rising as he processed this information. Jericho was being destroyed and it was all his fault. If the Revolution failed it'd be on him. Horror filled his chest, was that why Lucy's dead? Bitter tears threatened to cloud his eyes. Did he get her killed? Simon was onto the next thought before finishing the previous one. How many deaths had he caused?
A hand fisted in his hair, "Hey plastic I'm talking to you," The man's voice rose.
"What do you want from me?" Simon bit out.
"Not much," the man chuckled, "Just some fun."
"Fun?" he questioned, head snapping towards the voice.
Fear wormed its way into his circuits, he didn't like where this was going. He didn't like what that implied. The man's free hand caressed his cheek, thumb sliding over his lip. He shuddered, pulling away.
"Touch me and I'll-" he began
"You'll what?" The man cut him off," Scream? Cry? Kill me?" He jeered.
His hands dragged down Simon's torso and snaked around his waist and-Oh god where were his clothes? Simon's mouth gaped, he was fighting panic. He was sure his LED was an angry, spinning red. He tried to turn his panic into rage, forcing it into his voice.
"Get the fuck away from me."
"Not into foreplay, huh?"
The man pulled away, but Simon remained tense as his stress levels continued to rise. He heard the distinct sound of a belt unbuckling and froze. Without warning the belt wrapped tightly around his throat. Simon thrashed, livid, as he was harshly tugged towards the man. His mind was a tangled mess of panic and rage, only worsening with each passing second.
"Now be a good little robot and take care of this. "
He cringed away from the genitals in front of his face, his skin program disrupting as he strained against the strap holding him in place.
"I'm not doing that." He snapped defiantly
Error messages popped up in front of his eyes as he was harshly yanked towards the disgusting appendage again. The wiring in his spinal cords sent uncomfortable shock waves down his spine.
"Do it." The man growled
"No." he snarled, pulling away again.
A hand caught Simon's jaw, thick fingers roughly forcing it open. He violently thrashed, unwilling to let himself fall into the trap of compliance. This was crossing a line. When he felt the wet appendage force its way into his mouth all his senses burned red. He bit down on it, tearing a pained scream from the male's throat. The man pulled away and Simon crashed to the floor as a fist collided with his temple. He couldn't help but feel satisfaction despite the thirium running out of his nose.
"You little shit," the man seethed," You bit me. You actually fucking bit me!"
Simon's triumph was short lived, his sensors stuttered when a fist slammed into his jaw. His skull collided with concrete, causing fresh thirium to spill from it. Simon felt weight on his pelvis as the man straddled him, continuing his violent assault. Error messages were filling the darkness, warning him of the damage he was taking. The wiring and joints in his wrists bent with the extra weight, he tried to dislodge the man on top of him, fearing his wrists would snap without intervention. Simon's stress levels increased as he lost thirium, his skin program faltering as his head was repeatedly bashed by angry fists. At this rate he would be killed.
The blows suddenly stopped and Simon felt a hand squeezing at his jaw, yanking him into a sitting position. The man's fingers were clawing their way into Simon's mouth, forcing his jaw open again as he struggled. His mouth was being wrenched further and further apart as error messages flooded his mind again, warning him that something would break if this action didn't cease immediately.
"I'll teach you to fucking bite." The man spat
Simon urgently tried to clamp his teeth shut around the fingers as his mandible was involuntarily stretched further in a barbaric show of power. His enraged shouts turning into ear splitting shrieks of terror as the components that kept his jaw together began to bend and break. The wiring that hinged his jaw began to fray, some snapping apart entirely. His Self-Repair Program rapidly worked to stop the destroyed wiring from sparking as blue blood spilled from his mouth. His body convulsed as damage reports shot through his systems, searching for repair options. With a sickening metallic snap his lower jaw was brutally ripped away, becoming a deadzone as the sensors died. His body seized up as blood cascaded down his throat and torso.
Buzzing and heavy breathing filled Simon's audio processors as he felt himself hit the ground, thirium flooding his esophagus, only vaguely aware of his wrists snapping. He was left dazed as the error messages smothered his senses.
"Next time, " the man huffed," do as you're fucking told. Got it?"
Simon barely acknowledged him, weakly nodding as he bled out. He felt grateful that his physical body was incapable of feeling pain, or anything else really, at least not in the way that humans do. The events from earlier were so far away now, so different from his current situation. He feared that he imagined them afterall, that if he died here there really would be nothing after all .
The weight on top of him disappeared and Simon feebly resisted as his assaulter parted his legs, climbing in between them. He weakly shook his head, his throat only able to make unintelligible noises as the man spoke.
"Surprised you're still a Ken Doll," the man murmured, prodding at Simon's installation port, "There's not much to work with here."
Simon felt sick, it was as if his circuits were twisting as his assailant poked around the hole. He'd never been used like this, never even considered he'd end up in a situation like this. Simon had always considered himself to be bland as far as Androids went, there were many models far prettier than himself so how is it that he ended up in this position. He didn't understand.
He flinched, his cheeks flushing with humiliation when fingers brushed away his tears, he hadn't even realized he'd been crying. The touches were a mockery of gentleness and he fought the urge to cry more. He couldn't give this man the satisfaction, didn't want to play into this sick game.
"Androids are so beautiful when they cry." the man hummed more to himself than Simon.
Simon couldn't stop from trembling as the man caressed his torso, thumbing his hips thoughtfully. He grinded against Simon tentatively.
"Think I can fit?" His captor snorted
He was laughing at him. This man was about to rape him and was laughing about it. He was deranged, he had to be. No sane person could really be this cruel, could they? Simon shook his head in disbelief, trying to squirm away from the man forcing his way inside the installation port. His body scraping against the concrete as he pushed away. The man gripped his thighs, dragging him back in place, his broken wrists twisted into a mangled mess. Simon's skin receding where the fingers dug in.
"Don't move or I'll tear your fucking legs off too, plastic." His attacker threatened.
Simon shuddered at the thought, no part of him doubting this man would make good on his threats. The man pushed back into Simon and his throat made a distorted, strangled noise when he tried to contain a sob. He tried to tell himself that it didn't hurt, that it was just pressure and he had no reason to cry; but the wet noises and his body scraping against the ground was hard to ignore as he was roughly thrust into.
Every time he tried to focus on something else he was brought back to reality by a moan or a touch or a particularly hard thrust. He tried to work on closing the error messages, but they just reopened as he lost more and more blood, his Self Repair Program was barely functioning. He felt himself going limp, too exhausted to fight anymore. His thoughts drifted as he was rocked into the floor. Is sex always this violent? Does it always smell like sweat? Simon knew that it couldn't possibly be this bad all the time, but he couldn't see it being any better.
The man on top of him groaned, quickening his pace. He leaned down, biting at Simon's neck. Marking him. His lips brushed against Simon's ear and he recoiled.
"What're you crying for, plastic?," he panted, "It's not like you can feel it."
Simon wished that were true, he wished he would shut down already. At that moment he thought that maybe he could understand North. Maybe even forgive her for deciding he was so easily disposable. He suddenly understood how someone could hate humans enough to decide another Androids death was a necessary sacrifice.
The man came with a disgusting groan. Simon felt ill when he was filled. The panting man squeezed at Simon's hips in a rough mimicry of love as he pulled out and stood. Simon curled in on himself, trying to block out the feeling of semen dripping out of his port.
He sniffled, wincing when a door slammed shut somewhere above him. Now that he was alone he didn't bother to contain his cries. Simon quickly dissolved into a weeping mess, unable to stop himself from wailing as his body shook with sobs. He felt himself entering emergency stasis, and for not the first time, wondered if he'd ever wake up again.