AN: Sorry for the late update, but I hope you liked it. I have been really busy wrapping up the school year but the summer I promise to get you a chapter every other day, if not daily! Hopefully this chapter is worth it.

Olivia's POV

"Liv!" Melody runs up to me, arms wide. I'm ashamed to say that I am friends with the teacher of my daughter. I never thought I would be that type of PTA mom, yet here I am, hugging Savannah's kindergarten teacher. Savannah is in Carderock Springs Elementary, enrolled in kindergarten, even though she's youngest in her class. She's only four and most kids are five or six. But because DC had a different preschool system than Maryland, she took a placement test and she ended up scoring super high, not surprising me.

Savannah is really smart. She can be really shy and her lisp fools people but she's literally genius. Even if she wasn't my daughter, I would say that she's the smartest kid I know, age discarded. Not just book smart, but logically. She can really well for her age and she goes into the first grade class to do her reading groups. She's good with general logic too, but maybe because her father is in government. She's really shy towards stranger but once she gets to know you, she'll talk her head off about the military, government, economy, jobs, whatever. Which, in retrospect, aren't the ideal things you want your four year old to know extend knowledge on, but whatever. She has a completely different side, that age appropriate side that loves cotton candy and getting up early to watch Disney Junior.

I hug Melody back. Savannah has good behavior so I never really get called in. The last time I saw Melody Wilkinson was at a PTA meeting. I really don't know why I go to those things - it's literally just a bunch of white moms sitting around, gossiping about the neighborhood drama. It's not like I don't have better things to do either - I could spend my time at work with my clients.

But the thing is, and I feel very strongly about this, I want Savannah to have opportunity those girls in her class have. Anna doesn't get bullied or anything, she just feels left out. She's younger and smaller than the other kids and although smart, she can be shy and timid. I want just want everything for my daughter. So if those bratty girls have moms in the PTA, you can bet your ass Savannah's mom will be there too.

Melody, although young, is a very good teacher. She always makes Savannah feel comfortable and she's very friendly. She gives Anna enough work to challenge herself but not enough to overdo it, which I am grateful for. Jake is always going on about how she should be in even more advanced classes and shit like that and I'm just like, calm down. The poor girl is four years old.

"I wanted to talk to you!" Melody finally pulls away and scurries back to the desk. I look around the classroom - the kids are occupied with drawing with markers on paper at their desks. Melody pulls out a thin file from a binder and hands it to me. "I'm so glad you stopped by. I had to give you this. It's mine and Principal Edwards' official recommendation to move up to first grade by December. You have to send it to the county board."

I scrunch up my , the Principal and I have spoken about this before. I already wasn't too enthusiastic about Anna moving up to kindergarten when she should be in the preschool program, but they insisted and I agreed. I know she can handle the work, but I don't want her to fall behind socially and emotionally. Sure, she wouldn't mind now, but what happens in a couple years when she has no friends her age? When she is two years younger than everyone else? You think eleven year olds want to hang out with nine year olds? In a perfect world, yes. But this isn't a perfect world and I have to be realistic. I step away from the file. "Melody, we've been through this already. I'm against the idea wholeheartedly."

"Liv," Melody sighs and shakes her head. "You know how much I love little Savannah being in my class. She's an absolute sweetheart and she's beautiful, inside and out. But I don't want her to feel frustrated. She already goes to the first grade class for most of our lessons."

"She's fine," I argue, folding my arms. I know Melody is doing what she thinks is best, but I know what is best. "Savannah likes being advanced - especially since she's the youngest one in here. You said it yourself - 'little Savannah'. I know you try your best to make her feel involved, but in the end, she still feels like an outcast. It'll be worse if she moves up. Please, try to understand."

Melody smiles sympathetically. "I do, I really do. But try explaining that to your husband. Jake requested the recommendations in the first place."

I inhale, trying not to display my anger. It's just like Jake to pull some shit like that. "I'll handle it, Mel. Thanks. And where is Savannah anyway? Is she in the bathroom?"

"What? Savannah isn't here." Melody looks confused. My heart skips a beat. Where is my baby?

"What do you mean," my eyes skim the room in record speed. No sign of my little girl. "She's not here? Where is she? This is a school, Melody, where the-"

"Liv," Melody puts her hand on my shoulder. I fight the urge to push it off and run off and look for my daughter. Where the fuck is she? I need to know. How could a school just fucking lose a four year old girl like- "Liv, look at me. Jake came to pick her up over an hour ago. I thought you just came here to talk about the class arrangements. I thought you knew."

I close my eyes. Nevertheless, I feel the uncomfortable stares of confused little kids on me. It's just like Jake to pull some shit like that. He knew it would annoy me and worry me and he did it anyway. He did it in spite of me. I don't care if he throws shit my way - but he cannot mess with Savannah because of it. I open my eyes to a blushing Melody. I need to apologize - not only for going crazy but also dragging her into my marital problems. She's obviously just as uncomfortable as I am embarrassed. "I'm sorry."

I grab my bag and start out the door. Before I leave, she hisses, "Olivia? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," I lie. "Everything is just fine."

X

"Jake," I storm in the house, ready for an actual fistfight. I would whoop his ass and if he tried to lay a hand on me, I would call the cops and sue him for everything he has. I'm beyond pissed off. I could have had a heart attack at the elementary school. I was at a client's house before I came to pick up Savannah, so it would make sense that I didn't know Jake's manipulative ass brought her home. He doesn't come home for two days and suddenly he's making choices about Savannah's academic future?

I stand in the corner of the doorway, Jake and this skank facing me. I don't slut shame, but this girl looks like an actual prostitute. She can't be older than eighteen, she has black ends to her short, bleach blonde hair, she has a septum piercing, she is wearing a bright pink crop top and booty shorts. That, and she's a bit too close to Jake for my comfort.

"Who are you?" I ask her point blank. I'm not dealing with anymore bullshit, not today.

"I'm Hannah," she blows a small pink bubble out of gum and smacks it. She looks back up at Jake and smiles really fake. "Is this your wife?"

"What are you doing in my house?" I demand, stepping closer before Jake can answer.

Hannah laughs really obnoxiously. "Mr. Ballard hired me to take care of Savannah for tonight."

I want to laugh right back at her. This girl is hilarious if she thinks she's babysitting my kid. I don't care if Jake leaves, but I am not going anywhere. I look up at Jake. "Is this for real? Are you playing with me right now? Because, I'll give it to you. It's actually kind of funny."

Jake rolls his eyes and turns to hannah. "Sweetheart, give us a minute, would you?"

Hannah shrugs and walks past me with another try at her fake ass smile. I shudder when she passes me. I don't even care if she's in earshot when I start yelling at Jake. "First of all, where have you been for the last two days? It's not okay for you to manipulatively pick up Savannah from school! Where the hell is she, anyway? And why is a whore babysitting her tonight? I sure as hell am not going anyway."

"Slow down," Jake crosses his arms. I roll my eyes. As if I need to actually listen to any of his excuses. "To answer your questions, I was at my mom's house these past couple of days. She knows about everything. As for Savannah? I am sorry for picking her up. I just wanted to see her. She is upstairs, in her room. I told her to wait there while I hired Hannah Peters, a babysitter from . She is gonna watch Savannah while we go to this gala get together thing hosted by the White House. I'm invited and I get a plus one. You're my wife - I am taking you."

"Absolutely not," I yell. Is he actually insane? Has he really gone crazy? "My daughter is not staying here with that...thing. And I am not going anywhere with you. I have a life of my own, you know."

"Yes, and we have a life together." Jake says calmly. I'm surprised that I am the one yelling right now. I'm never the one yelling. I'm so just mad right now. "We have a life, Liv. And I know I made some mistakes - so have you. So can we go to the goddamn party?"

I close my eyes. I have made mistake - a lot of them. And I want nothing less than to spend the night with Jake. But I made a commitment and I stand by my commitments. I stood by Jake all these years, haven't I?

"Okay, but she's not staying with Hannah," I reply firmly. "I mean that, Jake. Call your mom or something because my daughter is not staying with that...Hannah."

X

"I have to tell you," Jake enters the black Bentley and buckles his seatbelt. We have two perfectly fine cars in our driveway, but no, we absolutely had to rent a driver in a fancy black car to drive us twenty minutes away, to the White House Correspondents Dinner. Jake turns to look at me quickly. "Your dress is alright."

I look down at the dress I pulled out of my closet. It's a sleeveless lace knee length navy blue one with an opening in the back. It's a little sexy for an event like this, but I pulled back the crown of my hair and wore black flats, so it looks okay. I would have preferred Jake called me beautiful or even pretty, but these days, my expectations aren't that high. "Thanks, I guess."

Jake nods and tightens the black bow on his collar. "Driver? Washington,, please."

X

'Wow,' I murmur underneath my breath.

I'm used to these fancy political events by now but this has to be one of the most elegant I have ever been to. Every minute or so, a new celebrity or politician pulls up and they're all everyone is buzzing about. We're in the biggest ballroom at a Hilton hotel, but it's large enough to be a hotel itself. Everyone, people you have never seen in your life, come up to you, kiss you on the cheek and ask you how you've been. Everyone seems to know everyone.

Except me.

I don't know exactly how Jake and I were invited. Since the cabinet, the President and Vice President are all in attendance, the Pentagon is on high alert, making sure all the security and everything is in order. But President Langston invites a group of heads from the Pentagon to join the dinner and this year, we were amongst them. I guess I should be flattered or something but I just am not. And everything going on in my life is too burdening for me to enjoy this right now. I am grateful to be here and everything, I guess. But I am just really pissed off at Jake right now.

Right now, we're just playing the political power couple. I have both my arms around one of Jake's and I am laughing at everyone one of the lame jokes he tells his work buddies. I guess we're cute and all because a lot of guests approach us and try to get to know us. The only way to get them to stop asking questions about our personal life is by showing them pictures of Savannah. They go on and on about how beautiful she is. They're not wrong.

I miss Anna. I mean, she's safe and okay with Jake's mom, but I know she misses me too. She's my princess. I am not the type of mom to overbear their kid and go crazy if I am not with them every second. But when you're in a situation as uncomfortable and as lonely as mines, you start missing your daughter.

"She's absolutely beautiful," this lady gushes, holding my iPhone a bit too much for my comfort. "She looks just like you. Stunning. What a lovely child."

"Thank you," I smile and try to remember the lady's name. But I have a shitty memory and my head is already not feeling so good right now, so it escapes me. I reach for my phone with one arm and hold Jake tighter with the other. I'm not holding onto Jake because I want to - God knows I don't. But I really feel like I am about to have a panic attack or stroke. I don't feel good. "Her name is Savannah. She's four."

"She's cute and she knows it," Jake jokes and the circle surrounding us laughs as if it's the funniest thing they've ever heard.

I frown. I'm seriously not trying to be rude or anything but I just am annoyed at how loud and obnoxious people are coming out to be. I know that's not fair, especially to some of these really sweet people, but every noise going to my ear is amplified like five thousand percent right now. I have a serious migraine coming through.

"How did you come upon the name Savannah?" another lady clears her throat. "It's just so...Southern. It's darling. Savannah Ballard. It has quite a ring to it."

Jake smiles and responds before I have a chance to. "Olivia's mom was born in Savannah, Georgia. She passed when Liv was twelve. It was our way to honor her."

I grimace. I wonder if Jake knows the truth somehow. I wonder if he knows that my mom was from Manhattan, born and raised.

I wonder what this infatuated crowd would think if they knew the truth - that when I gave birth to Savannah, i insisted her name would be what it is because it's the only thing I had to remember Fitz by.

I wonder if Savannah will ever know that she is named after the motel where I fell in love with her father.

Over and over again.

I look up and above the crowd. I feel so sick and I miss Fitz so much I can swear I see him right now. I swear I see him with his wavy brown hair and dark blue eyes and a nicely fitted suit walking in surrounded by a few cabinet members. The image is so real, so emotional that I get lightheaded. I shouldn't have come here.

"Livvy?" Jake raises his eyebrows at me. Don't call me that. Don't you dare call me that. Only one person can call me that and it's not you. It will never be you! "Livvy, you look a bit nauseous, honey. Are you okay?"

"I," I try to speak but my throat is too dry for me to even swallow. I wipe a bead of sweat off my forehead, only to find that my hands are shaking. Everyone around me is mumbling. I seriously feel like I am going to pass out or throw up. Or both, even. "I think...I need to use the restroom. Sorry."

Then I run. I run and I don't stop. I'm glad I didn't wear heels or I swear I would drop dead on the ballroom floor right now. I push past people I have no right to push past. I haven't been in this much pain since I was in labor, and I do not say that lightly. My head is spinning and small dark dots are sneaking into my vision. What the hell is wrong with me? Am I this damaged?

"Liv," I hear a voice after me, but it's not Jake's.

I close my eyes and rush blindly out of the ballroom. I must be hallucinating. I must be plain crazy because I swear I just heard his voice. And I don't wanna remember him. Because when I open my eyes and I find out he's not there, I will just be more heartbroken than I already am.

I rush into the restroom, grateful nobody else is in there. Everyone is probably out, having the time of their lives. Everyone except me. I really thought I could do this - live without him. I have been doing it for five fucking years. But I miss him. Everyday, I miss him.

I used to think Savannah was enough and in a way, she is. She keeps me going. She makes me happy. But I don't make myself happy. And Jake sure as hell doesn't either. But Fitz, he did. And I know that's crazy. I know we only knew each other for a couple of days. And I know it was impossible to keep a healthy relationship in that time.

But he was enough. He made me smile. He made me open up and in return, he did the same. He cared about me. And I sure as hell cared about him. I let him down and time after time, he still trusted me.

I let my guard down and felt okay doing that. I felt like a queen - that's how he treated me, anyway. And no, our situation wasn't ideal. It was crap. But we were strong. Despite everything, we were strong and we survived because we had each other.

That's all anyone in this fucked up world can ask for.

I throw open a stall door and I am on my knees within seconds. I throw up numerous times and when I am done, I throw up some more. Even when there's nothing left, I throw up. I don't even hear him come in...

Somehow, my stomach decides to spare me and I stop throwing up. I wipe the tears that have spilled out of my eyes and flush the toilet. I really hope nobody heard me from outside of the restroom, but I don't really care in the end. I just want to go home and forget about tonight, even though it barely got started.

"Liv," I hear him this time. I am afraid to look around - afraid to see it's not really him and feel the pain and hurt again. But I do anyway. I turn around and I am met with two hands taking me by my waist and bringing me to my feet.

When I am up, I am facing a set of royal blue eyes.

Fitz holds up a small pile of paper towels and smirks, like something is funny. "Hi, Livvy."