I don't own Hetalia okay? I know I skipped a bit of time on this section but it's building to the big drama coming up. Anyway, enough of this A/N, on with the fic!
May 26th 1917
(From the journal of Ivan Braginsky)
Well I am heading back to the continent I was born on, at least for a year. Most likely more, but for at least a year by what the orders say. Barring any injury or miracle that this ends this cursed war early. It was a most painful goodbye and I know no one was comfortable with it. Little Nikolai sensed something was wrong. Last time he was at these docks was to see his "Aunt Tetya Katy" when she came back from England. He's been picking up on Russian from Natalya, who is insistent he speak both his mother and father's native tongues and mixing the two languages. It was hard saying goodbye to the little boy. I bought him a large ice cream cone, much to Natalya's disapproval to quiet him down while I spoke to Fredka alone. I had to tell him. I may never see him again. I pulled him to the side and told him just how much he meant to me. How I never felt better with any other person on the planet. I may have silenced the man for once in his life with this talk. I then held him close and just felt that for a moment. Following that I took his face, kissed him on the cheek and then his hand. I told him with that kiss my heart was in his hand. He paused and looked at me confused. He then regained his composure and smiled at me, I guess assuming it was some custom from the old country, and said, "I will miss you too so much Vanya. I want you to come back safe. Safer than Mattie did. I will make sure that Katyusha is kept safe. You've seen what I have done keeping Natalya and Nikolai safe." He then did the same series of kisses, once again I am assuming he thought was just a ritual from back in Russia and said "You have my heart in your hand too bol'shoy brat use it to stay safe." He's picked up on Russian from Natalya and I and had recently taken to calling me his big brother. Fredka then hugged me tightly and I could feel the tears coming from his face. He didn't want to break down in front of Natalya or Nikolai as he thought they needed to see him as a stable rock being the husband and father he is.
Shame is, that while I had pretty much confessed my feelings my heart and soul, I don't think Fredka saw them the same way. I guess it is best that way that he sees me as a big brother so that keeps the family together, so Natalya does not become repulsed at two of the closest men in her life. I do have the photo taken not too long after Christmas of 1916 in my wallet. My little sister, my brother-in-law and my precious little nephew. I will come back. I will fulfill my duty. You will have me as the honorable figure you see me as.
God this is so painful, saying goodbye to those I love to go into the hell mouth of war, the mangled bodies... just be with me lord.
So how was that? Good? Bad? Short? Long? (for a journal entry) let me know in a review. I don't have much else to say on the note to this one, so remember to read (well you just did) and to review. Ciao for now,
otherrealmwriter
aka
Realm.