Fitz's POV

"Talk patiently," Livvy instructs me, bringing both sides of my tie over around my collar. "Be apologetic. And for God sakes, do not yell at them, Fitz. Just because it semi worked the first time does not mean the senate is gonna be looking forward to it today."

I grin, looking down at her. "I guess. They really are annoying, though."

"Maybe," Livvy shrugs, knotting the tie. "But refrain from expressing that. In just a few short hours, they're gonna be the reason you're employed and not begging for change down at Lafayette Park."

I laugh and wrap my arms around her waist. "You're mean."

"I'm honest," Livvy replied matter of factly. "You're gonna do fine. Just be yourself. Without the angry issues part, of course."

I stick my tongue out at her but I'm grinning. "You know, tonight when i come home, I'm taking you on a date."

Liv raises her eyes from my neck. "A what?"

I smirk. "A date. A real, actual date. Isn't it weird that you're the mother of my child, I have known you for five years and we have never went on a date?"

She finishes my tie and looks up at me, smiling widely. I can tell she's excited about this too. And not just about the date. For the job. I have to go back in, sit with the Senate for a couple of hours just as a formality. Then, I get to decide whether or not I want the job. I am not gonna tell Liv this, but I'm not exactly sure I'm gonna take it. At this point, I don't know if I would want it.

I mean, I worked hard for it but I lost a lot of respect for the government system after they blantly refused to give me the job in the beginning. I was so disgusted and my passion for politics just went down the drain, thus making me stand up and call them off. At that point, I had nothing to lose. And now, I have a lot to.

I know Livvy wants me too. It's not about the money or anything. It's about me being able to do it but not putting in the effort or swallowing the pride to make the Senate actually consider me, if that makes sense. Liv was mad because even though I would make a great Secretary of Defense, I just didn't fight for it.

That said, I don't know if that job is what I want for myself. I don't even know if DC is what I want for myself. All I know is that my family, for once, deserves my undivided attention. I gotta get closer to Savannah, rebuild the relationship between Karen and myself all while just being there for Livvy, whatever she needs.

I'm not angry about that anymore. yesterday morning, walking down the block to Starbucks with my girls while the sun rose, I realized that there are so many things more important than petty fights and feelings. And there are so many more important things than jobs, no matter how high profile they might be.

"Whatever happens, Livvy," I clear my throat and try to turn the joking into a more serious conversation. "I need to know that you'll be by my side. You'll work this out with me, whatever the hell this is."

Livvy looks back up at me, a soft look in her brown eyes. She cups her hand around the side of my face and lowers her voice gently. "I'll be by your side, Fitz. I'm not leaving you. Not like before."

Olivia's POV

I watch him as he slides into his Mercedes. Savannah, Karen and I wave rigorously until he's out of sight. Since it's basically guaranteed he'll get the job, we told Karen and you can see that she feels a lot better now.

But Karen...I worry about Karen a lot. Even though it's only been a few days, I genuinely feel like her mother. Or older sister. Or lifelong mentor or something like that. Because she truly is an amazing little girl and I am so blessed that Savannah has such a caring older sister. And I am so honored to get the chance to spend time with her because once you get passed the obvious trust issues, she is really funny, sweet and just a cool kid to be around. But that doesn't mean she's perfect. There is still baggage and past issues. I know better than anybody that it's impossible to move on unless you have closure.

There's a couple of things I have to do today, starting with signing the divorce papers. I know that Fitz said I shouldn't at the moment and while his logic makes sense, I know what I don't want. And that's being in this marriage any longer. I don't hate Jake. He took care of me and he took care of Savannah. But in the end, I just wasn't happy and I did the best thing by leaving - for all three of us. The reason I didn't sign those papers right away - ...actually, I don't know the reason. Just like I don't know the reason I didn't tell Fitz about Savannah sooner. I guess I'm like Karen, in a way. I'm scared. Scared of change, scared of reality. But now I'm ready. I don't care what Fitz says - I am signing those papers and I'm doing it today.

Another thing is taking an extended leave from my crisis management firm. Ever since I quit being a defense lawyer, I have had to work a lot less because in my practice, I have associates including Abby, a girl named Quinn and as of recently, a guy named Huck who I met while working unofficially on Fitz V California.

It's not that I want to leave necessarily and it's not that Fitz would pressure me to, because I know he wouldn't. It's just that I'm at a very pivotal time in my life and so is Savannah and so is Fitz along with Karen. There's gonna be a time where Savannah is off to school and Fitz's job is settled and then I can go back to work full time. Work is really important to me - it always has been. But family, which is really sensitive right now, is more important. I'll go back in a couple of weeks.

"Karen," I close the door and turn behind me. Karen is literally as tall as me so I don't have to look down or anything. "I wanna talk to you for a second."

Savannah takes the hint and runs off into the barely furnished living room while Karen and I start up the stairs. I clear my throat. "How are you doing?"

"I'm okay." Karen nods. "I'm happy Daddy got the job. How about you?"

We get up the flight of stairs and since the house is three stories, we start on the other set. "I'm happy he got the job too. And I'm proud of you for being happy. I know...I know this job means a lot to him. And I just hope you aren't worried he won't spend a lot of time with you, because knowing your father, he will."

"I guess," Karen nods, her hand grazing the stair railing. "I mean, I don't really care, you know? Like, it's whatever. I'm so sick of being so emotional and angry about everything."

We stop in front of her room and I look at her. Her emotions are all justified. I wish she wouldn't belittle them. Forgetting about them or throwing them away isn't going to help her in the long run. I know I shouldn't ask this, but I do anyway. "Karen. Would it make you feel better if you saw your mom? Even if it was only for a couple of minutes?"

"She's here?" Karen's eyes widen.

"No," I tell her quickly, swallowing. But I know Damn well she can be. I'm Olivia Pope. I can make shit happen. I can get answers. And I can get Mellie Grant here if I wanted to. And honestly? I really do. I take a deep breath. "If you want that, Karen, I can make it happen."

She just blinks at me. I can tell she's contemplating it. She really wants to see her mom but she doesn't want to make herself vulnerable again.

But I would never, ever let Mellie hurt Karen again. If she came into her life, it would be very clear it would be only once. I am not judging Mellie - I am not in any position to question what she's been through. Her thoughts, her justifications. All I know is that she really hurt her daughter and there is no reasoning to that. So while I don't know enough to hate Mellie, I definitely don't respect her. Especially after she didn't testify for Fitz five months after he was arrested five years ago.

Karen clears her throat and speaks in a low voice. "You could bring my mom to DC?"

"Maybe," I speak up quickly. "But only for a little while. And only once. I just think that you guys should get a chance to talk. And then she would go back to New York. Does that make sense?"

Karen nods rapidly and it occurs to me that she hasn't seen her mother in four years. She was seven when she last saw her. She deserves to see her again - even if only for a few minutes. I smile nervously at her and I am about to go back downstairs before Karen walks towards me and wraps her arms around my waist, giving me a huge hug.

"Liv," Karen whispers into my shoulder. "Thank you. Thank you so much. You're the best."

I swallow and hug her back. It means so much to me that Karen is saying this, especially since I know she's being genuine. When she lets me go and disappears into her room, I walk steadily to mine and Fitz's.

I take out a pair of clean underwear and bra out of a Nike backpack shoved up against the wall and out the Adidas duffel bag next to it, I pull out some clothes and make my way to the fancy master bathroom shower.

Once in there, I just let my face hit the hot water. What the hell am I doing? No, honestly. It is not my place to do this. I'm not Karen's mother. That's the truth - I am not. Even though I would love to be, I'm just not. And it's not my place to make these decisions about her.

But the thing...okay, Fitz is a great father. He is a sensitive, rational, loving father. But like myself, he doesn't always make the right decisions. This is my arena. I know what it's like to lose my mom.

Even though she wasn't the best mom in the world, I would have given anything to see her again. To have some closure. Some type of sure goodbye. Karen needs that. Above everything, Karen deserves that. I can't imagine how Fitz must feel about Mellie. He thinks he's protecting Karen by keeping Mellie away, but he is not. He is just doing more harm down the line.

I might regret this terribly. I probably will. I am so out of line, it isn't even visible anymore. And I know Fitz will probably get mad at me but maybe he'll understand. Maybe he'll trust me, even though I haven't given him any reason to in the past.

The truth is, I am just doing this for Karen. She has this way about her that makes you love her right away. And I know she's older and even though she may accept me and one day consider me a mom, she is not in that stage yet. Maybe she won't ever be. I'm fine with that. I can live with that. I do consider Karen a daughter nevertheless. Maybe that doesn't justify making these decisions for her, but I know Fitz never would.

I don't want to talk to Fitz about this. I know he would refuse. And I know it sounds crappy that I'm going behind his back. But I know Karen wouldn't tell him.

In the end, I don't want to hurt, betray or lie to Fitz again. In a way, a big way, I know that what I'm doing is wrong. I know that. But I also know that if Karen doesn't get closure, if she doesn't accept her feelings and get better, I am just gonna end up blaming myself.

When I get out of the shower, I sit wrapped in my towel on the mattress. I pull my laptop to my lap and take a deep breath before opening it. This is wrong of me. It's ridiculous how I know it's wrong but I am willing to do it anyway. In the grand scheme of things, though, this is the right choice. I wish I had the option to see my mom one last time. And I would do anything for Karen to have that opportunity.

I have to justify this to myself as I get the information I need online and then get on email.

'Mellie Grant,

This is Olivia Pope from Washington DC...'

Fitz's POV

"Mr. Grant," Senator Baylin sits upright and leans over to shake my hand awkwardly.

I reluctantly accept before skimming my eyes over at the rest of the senators in the chamber. Senator Carson, being the majority leader, walks to me equally as awkward.

"On behalf of the entire chamber," he clears his throat and holds out his hand, smiling weakly. "I would like to apologize for our behavior two days ago. We were impulsive and we didn't give you a fair chance to make your bid."

I want to agree with him, but I just nod and take his hand. Hold your tongue and be strong for Livvy. She would kick your ass if she found out you were talking back to the Senate majority leader AGAIN. "Thank you for a second chance, Senator."

I pull into my suit pocket and hand him the flash drive.

He looks at it and then back up at me. "Let's get started."

X

"Remarkable," Senator Carson comments under breath as the projector turns off and the lights rise again. "That was... well done, Mr. Grant."

"Thank you," I smile modestly, when in reality I want to scream 'hell yeah it was'.

Senator Baylin clears his throat. "Upon watching this and reading the President's comments about you yesterday, like Senator Carson said on the phone, the job is yours if that's what you would like."

The senators look down at me, beaming. But my eyes just go to my lap and suddenly, my mouth goes dry. Finally, when I can speak, my voice is uneven and weak. "Who wouldn't like to be Secretary of Defense?"

Senator Carson chuckles. "I'm happy you feel that way-"

"No," I lick my lips and look up. "I'm actually, genuinely asking you. What type of person would say no to this?"

Carson looks at me, gaping. He grins nervously, not quite knowing what to say. So I just go on, my voice growing louder. "What about the type of guy who blantly gets rejected first because he has a family? What about the type of guy who tries to right his wrongs? What about a guy who doesn't want to apologize for being a father?"

Carson turns his head away, his cheeks blushing.

I shake my head and scoff. I thought I wanted this. On the drive here, I was so happy, so excited. But just coming in, seeing these senators, seeing how much I was judged the first time around...I have enough work to do at home. And I mean what I said - Savannah, Karen and Livvy deserve my undivided attention. So even though this is hard, I know it's the right thing to do. The best thing right now is to spend time with my family. And I want to. After so long, I really want to.

I get up and stuff my hands in my pockets. "Goodbye. Keep the presentation. You could use it."

X

I run my finger along the edge of my iPhone. I know that it doesn't matter how long I wait - Livvy is gonna be pissed when she finds out I didn't take the job.

She believes in me. She expects me to be the best. If only she could understand that this is the best thing. I didn't want the job. If it meant working with a bunch of senators that I resented and coming back to an unhappy, attention deprived family, I do not want it.

What I want - what I need, is my daughters and my wife. I say 'wife' because when the time is right, I have every intention of marrying Olivia Pope. She has made mistakes and our relationship is difficult and devastating and life changing but you cannot choose who you fall in love with. I just so happened to fall in love with Livvy.

I fell hard. And now that I have her, I would do anything to keep her. I will support her, be there for her, and love her unconditionally.

And I know that she'll do the same.

I inhale and unlock my phone. I go to her contact and am about to press CALL when I have another call incoming. It's an unknown number. I raise my eyebrows before picking it up. "Hello?"

"Fitz," a voice cuts through the other end and I feel like I have been punched in the throat.

Mellie.

I swallow. "How did you get this number?"

"Hello to you too," Mellie smirks, her condescending voice unmistakably the same. "It's nice to hear from you again."

I close my eyes and try to even my breathing. I'm not trying to be dramatic, but Mellie trying to come back into my life is the worst thing that can happen at this point. Contrary to popular belief, I don't hate her. I couldn't hate the mother of my child. But she's just never anybody I would want to see or hear from ever again. And I have no idea how or why she's calling. I haven't spoken to her for four years and that is not something I feel regret on.

"It's not nice to hear from you," I snap, my voice low. "I never thought I would hear from you ever again and I made my peace with that. I was actually very satisfied about that. But now I am here, standing in front of the United States Capitol, on the phone with the devil. So when I say 'how do you have this number' I mean 'how the fuck did you contact me after I made that virtually impossible?'"

"Calm down, baby," Mellie laughs lightly. I press my lips together. I should hang up. More than anything I want to hang up. I don't want to talk to this - "Fitz, your number was pretty easy to track down once I got an email linked from your home wifi."

I don't say anything. What the hell is she talking about?

"It wasn't from Karen," Mellie goes on casually. "I always thought my daughter would be the one to contact me but no. Her daddy probably made that impossible, didn't he?"

I ball up my knuckles into fists. I'm so...I can't even breath right now. I have no idea what she's talking about and my heart is beating so incredibly fast. "What...the fuck are you talking about, Mellie?"

Mellie sighs. "Oh, Fitz, honey, I am talking about your wife. Or maybe she's not your wife. Quite honestly, I haven't got a clue just who the hell she is, but her name is Olivia Pope. And she wanted me to come down and meet my daughter again."

AN:

Thanks for all your reviews and support, as always.To kbrow84: You're not the only one who is confused about how I am writing the flashbacks revealing more about the case and Gerry's killer. Just so you and others know, I would NEVER leave a huge chunk of that out and obviously, I will reveal the killer. But I am planning to make this story only about 40 chapters long so I am planning out the flashbacks that reveal said answers. Don't worry