"Do you guys think Keith is infertile?"

"What?!" Keith's face turned redder than his armor. "That's- I-"

Pidge pushed her glasses up on her face, blushing just a smidge. "I mean, as a half-Galra, half-human hybrid, I wonder if you can, uh… you know."

"I haven't- god!"

Hunk looked up from his workstation. "Pidge, where is this coming from? Why are you thinking about Keith, uh, breeding?"

"I don't know, scientific curiosity? I was reading about an Altean study on-"

"There's nothing wrong with the hardware, Pidge," Keith interjected. "Trust me."

"Trust him," Lance chimed in.

"Wait-" Hunk burst out laughing. "Have you guys-"

"I don't want to talk about it." Keith looked like he was in pain, wishing for this conversation to be over. "Can we please stop talking about something other than my di-"

"I'm not saying there's anything wrong with the, uh, hardware, Keith. I'm talking about the software. There's a good chance you won't ever produce viable zygotes. It would honestly be a miracle if you could, like how a mule is infertile, being a cross between a horse and a donkey. There's nothing wrong with the mule, per se, but it's the last of its line, even if it tries to mate with another mule."

Keith's eyebrows scrunched together. "I'm a mule?"

"Biologically speaking, I think so. I mean, it's possible that Galran and human DNA are somehow compatible in some way that hasn't been studied yet-I mean, you ARE almost definitely the first product of Galra-human interspecies mating, so I guess we won't really know unless we run some tests, like-" Pidge stopped short, her face now very, very pink.

After a beat of palpable silence that was honestly torture for Keith, he slowly drew out, "Like what, Pidge?"

"Um." Pidge took off her glasses and looked at the blurry ceiling. "One would probably, uh, examine a sample under a microscope, and probably how it interacts with a human and/or Galra egg. Or, barring that…"

Hunk grinned. "Keith just goes to town on someone and we wait for results?"

Lance cackled. "Yeah, like that would ever happen! I mean, Keith's, you know… besides, where would we even find a girl?"

Pidge coughed.

"...RIGHT. Sorry, forgot." Lance rubbed his neck. "Well, anyway, as you guys all now know, Keith is a man's man, amirite?"

"Um, actually," Keith said quietly, "I don't really have a preference one way or another. I just… like… you? For some reason?"

"Aw, how sweet of you," Lance drawled sarcastically. "Really warms the heart."

"Shut up." Keith grinned and threw a pen, which landed squarely in Lance's face.

"Ow!"

Hunk stood up from his desk. "Alright, well, if we're done talking about whether or not Keith's dick works, I'm gonna go grab some dinner. All this talk about zygotes really works up an appetite, you know?"

Pidge quickly gathered her things and shoved them into her bag. "Yeah, I'm gonna go, uh, hit the showers. Bye." She was out the door before Hunk had even taken a few steps.

"Weird. Alright, have fun guys. But not too much fun." Hunk winked and walked out. Lance and Keith were left alone. It was quiet for a moment.

"Hey, you good, man?" Lance asked.

Keith looked up from his fingernails, which he had been picking at for several minutes now. "I… I don't know, Lance. That was, uh, fuckin weird."

Lance laughed. "Yeah, tell me about it. Fun team-building exercise: let's all talk about my boyfriend's dick!"

Keith smirked. "Boyfriend?"

"Uhhhhhhhhh yeah I've been saying it in my head for weeks, honestly it's on you for not noticing."

The smirk turned into a genuine, sweet smile. "My bad, babe. I'll try to pay more attention to you. If that's possible."

"Oh, it's definitely possible," said Lance. "My parents were always making eyes at the dinner table, holding hands and stuff. At the time I thought it was kinda gross, but like, I want that."

Keith's smile faded. "You want a family?"

"I mean, yeah." Lance shrugged. "Obviously not right now, because we're saving the universe and junk, and Voltron is kind of our family right now, but once it's all over… I came from a big family, you know?"

"Theoretically," Keith said. "I just had my dad growing up. And my mom… is Galra."

Lance's eyes widened. "Oh my god, I'm sorry. Talking about wanting a family when we just had the most awkward conversation ever about you… not being able to do that." Lance walked over to Keith and knelt by his chair. "Well, good thing you have me." He pressed a kiss to his cheek, and squeezed his hand.

Keith smiled hollowly. "Right." He kissed Lance's knuckles, then stood. "I'm gonna go get a few rounds in for sword training. See you later?"

"Want a sparring partner? I've been meaning to work on my-"

"I was actually hoping for some solo practice, if that's okay. Another time, though." Keith shot Lance a smile and darted out the door. Alone, Lance sunk into Keith's chair, breathing in the lingering aroma of his boyfriend's scent.

"...wait, the gym is the other way."

Lance looked at the door that had just closed, after Pidge had left it open in her rush to escape the awkward conversation.

"Huh."