I do not own Hetalia okay? I don't have much more to say here so enough of this A/N, on with the fic!

November 17th 1918

(from the diary of Natalya Jones nee Arlovskaya)

I cannot do this! I just cannot! I thank God above that Katyusha had come over to help, but I am so scared. Only a few weeks ago we had gotten the news of big brother's death in the war. Fredka was so healthy I did not think this flu would get him. I thought Matvey was more likely to catch it with his injuries and how the gas attack affected his respiratory system. I heard stories from the other women in our neighborhood about them losing brothers, sisters, parents, children. I lost my brother in that stupid war started by a bunch of Europeans who hate each other forever! To think I will lose my husband to a flu too! No. I have kept Nikolai busy by having him look after his baby siblings. Ivan and Anya are still young. But Nikolai keeps wanting to play with his father, and doesn't quite understand why he cannot see him. I honestly say that I could not have done this without big sister. She's been quite the rock for us since all this happened.

I took some soup up to him while Katyusha looked after the children and he looked so pale, it was scary. I made sure he ate it. I checked his forehead for fever and he felt extremely hot. I gave him one of the aspirin that Matvey had gotten a few days ago and just put a damp rag on his head, hoping the fever will go down. He will overcome this. I know he had been mumbling something about seeing big brother again, but that is not possible. Unless even in death he is haunting this house. Or it is fever delusions. I do not know. I do think he at least knew I was there. I shamefully admit that I broke down and cried on his sleeping form. I then felt his hand running through my hair and a faint, 'stop crying Nattie….I'll get better soon…as long as you and Katy keep taking care of everything….' And then was a few delusional sounding mentions of big brother. I looked up at him again and he smiled at me. 'Make sure the little kiddos are good. Nikolai is little Ivan and Anya's hero after all…. And the little hero needs someone to help him….'

He had come home sick a few days ago and he's not looking much better. Possibly a little worse. I'm scared for him. He's been better than I could have ever asked for. I know on my own I probably would not be so lucky to have found a man so caring and family oriented like Fredka is. Honestly I would probably still be unmarried to this day if I hadn't met a man so willing to put up with my moods. He's given me 3 beautiful children. I just pray he stays here for a long time.

So how was that? Good? Bad? Short? Long? Let me know in a review. I don't have much else to say in this A/N, so remember to read, well you just did, and to review. Ciao for now,

otherrealmwriter

aka

Realm.