Halo
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A/N-thank you very much to everyone who has kindly read and reviewed this story!
Chapter Sixty-One-New Revelations
Leia was surprised that Ben capitulated so easily to her request to Rey. He showed no emotion, just bent down briefly to whisper in Rey's ear, before abruptly leaving. Time slowed down for Leia, as if her brain needed to absorb the image of her adult son walking away from her. Just for a minute she was back in the past, watching her ten-year-old boy walking away with resentful tears in his eyes, the day she had sent him away to train with Luke. Then, after an immeasurable period, time sped up again. Leia quickly clasped her hands together to stop them shaking and hoping that Rey hadn't noticed her lapse in control.
"Can I offer you something to eat or drink?" She offered automatically.
In fact, Rey had noticed Leia's strange reaction to Ben leaving. She observed the older woman thoughtfully as she declined Organa's offer of refreshment. "I would rather get straight down to business." She said, taking a seat.
"Of course." Leia settled down in the seat opposite the young scavenger and folded her hands in her lap. "Where to begin?" The question was merely rhetorical. "During my tenure as a senator serving in the reconstituted Galactic Senate in Chandrila's Hanna City, I heard many unsubstantiated rumours that Old Ben Kenobi had fathered a child. I dismissed them at first-Kenobi was a legendary Jedi master who served on the Jedi High Council during the last years of the Republic Era. During the Imperial Era, he adopted the alias Ben Kenobi in order to hide from the regime that drove the Jedi to near extinction. He was a noble man, known for his skills with the Force. He became a mentor to my brother prior to his death. He never once mentioned to Luke that he had sired any offspring…but…." She stopped and reached for the pot of Caf' to pour herself a fortifying drink.
"He was alone on Tatooine for many years watching over my brother. Loneliness can drive a man to many things. He might have sought companionship on occasion during his lonely exile. Over the years, the rumours became more persistent, more embellished. Luke and I began to discuss the possibility that there might be some truth in them. So, Luke decided to investigate to prove once and for all if such a child possibly existed."
When the guilt came it took Leia down the old familiar path of regret. She wanted to refuse to walk it, pretend that she was the person she demanded that she be. She sipped at the hot Caf' to ease the dryness in her throat, but instead the hot caffeine made her throat constrict to the point where she felt she could hardly breathe. Rey noticed her struggle and calmly poured the older woman some fresh water from the pitcher standing at the centre of the table. She handed the water to Leia wordlessly, not remarking on what had caused Organa's strange reaction.
Drinking the cool water gave Leia time to regain her composure. She had to admit she was impressed with Rey's patience and the way she calmly reacted to the break in the story. She was so different to Ben. Pushing thoughts of her son aside so as not to become distracted, Leia cleared her throat and resumed talking. "After many months and many false leads, Luke was finally able to substantiate the rumours that had been floating around the senate for years, and it sent him right back to where his life began-Tatooine."
"So, it was true?" Rey breathed. "Ben Kenobi fathered a child?"
"Yes, and she was hiding in plain sight with her mother and stepfather on Tatooine." Leia revealed.
"The child was a girl." Rey mused quietly. It was like all the pieces of the jigsaw were finally coming together. "What happened then? Did Luke confront the woman directly? How did he know for sure that the girl was Ben Kenobi's daughter? Did….?"
Leia held up her hand to stop the barrage of Rey's questions. She waited for Rey to quieten down before continuing. "There was no doubt in Luke's mind that the girl was Kenobi's daughter. She looked just like him. He didn't approach them straight away, he needed a while to gather his thoughts, and consider his next course of action. He contacted me at the Senate and revealed his dilemma. I urged him to make contact straight away, but he was more cautious. In the end, events preceded him, and he was forced to intervene with the family. They were working as innocuous junk traders. It was like they were deliberately trying to keep under the radar. When Luke finally made the decision to talk with them, the family were attacked by a bounty hunter. It seemed that we weren't the only ones investigating the rumours. The stepfather was killed defending his family, it was only with Luke's assistance that the woman and child survived. He took them away and placed them in the care of some of his most trusted acquaintances on Naboo, hoping to keep them hidden while he made sure that there were no further attacks from interested bounty hunters. But the woman fled the safe house and took her daughter with her."
Leia felt the same old memories haunting her. She had seen and done things that made her sick to think of, they would follow her for the rest of her life and would only bring her pain. "Their loss deeply affected Luke. He revered Ben Kenobi and the child's loss was like losing his last connection with his trusted mentor. He spent a long time trying to find them again, but the woman had gone to ground. Despite his best efforts he was unsuccessful. I did my own investigations, but mine proved just as fruitless."
"Do you believe that the girl was my mother and the woman my grandmother?" Rey demanded as she pulled Kenobi's old lightsaber off her belt and placed it on the table for Leia to see. She saw Organa's eyes widen slightly in recognition, which proved all the confirmation she needed that Han had been right and the lightsaber did indeed belong to Old Ben Kenobi. "This was found in a box that my parents left behind on Jakku, along with a datapd with an image of my mother on it. The first time I held it in my hand it felt familiar, like it belonged to me."
Leia knew there would be no escape from these memories, it wasn't an illness that could be seen or fixed, the pain was to be her punishment. "When I first saw you, I sensed a familiarity about you and I couldn't explain why. It's not your looks, you must take after your mother's side of the family in that regard, but it was the way you carried yourself, the feeling I got from the Force when I was around you…"
Rey kept quiet as she listened to Leia ramble on and on about Old Ben Kenobi and how some aspects of her personality reminded Organa of the legendary Jedi master. "It was these feelings that made me so eager to train you myself. I treasured each moment I spent with my brother," Leia added. "The things he taught me . . . I use them every day. Once you touch the Force, it's part of you always. Over the years, I continued to learn, to grow. There were times on the Senate floor when the meditations I'd practiced with Luke were the only thing that kept me from causing a galactic incident. I failed with Ben. I was determined not to with you. My biggest regret is sending him away. That's when I lost him, when I lost the better part of myself."
The cracks in the Resistance General's façade were beginning to show. Leia reached for the pot of Caf' and poured herself another drink. "I'm digressing." She murmured as she took a tentative sip. Like before, her favourite drink only served to set her throat on fire. She began to cough as she struggled to breathe as the heavy weight of her past failures began to gain a chokehold on her iron hard control. Rey quickly poured some more water into a glass and held it to Organa's lips so she could drink it.
"I'm being torn apart. I want to be free of this pain. I failed Ben. I failed myself. I failed everyone. You were right to refuse me. You were right." Leia's composure continued to crumble as she collapsed against Rey, who was forced to put an arm around the older woman to stop her from falling. She was both shocked and stunned at the words coming out of Leia's mouth. They were the same words that Ben had said to Han on several occasions. Like mother. Like son it seemed.
Leia's eyes were glassy with tears as she carried on talking. "It was years later when Luke sensed a disturbance in the Force from the darkside and the familiar presence of Emperor Palpatine. It shook him to the very core as it did me when he confided in me. We both agreed to keep it a secret and not tell Han. We didn't think he would be able to handle the situation very well. We didn't tell Ben either. Luke and I had spent a lifetime shielding Ben from the horrors of our past. He was already struggling enough and we wanted to keep him well away from any source of trouble. Luke went off by himself to investigate and as you already know recruited Lando to help him instead. You know the rest."
"Lando said they tracked the Sith assassin to Pasaana and found his ship but no Ochi and the trail went cold. But that's not the end of it, is it?" Rey questioned as she helped Leia settle back into her chair.
"Luke had already made the connection that the young couple that Ochi was pursuing was Ben Kenobi's daughter and that she was married and now had a child of her own. You." Leia revealed. "He didn't find them himself-they reached out to him. They had been looking for him for a long time after the young woman learned of her true identity. He arrived at the meeting place but the young couple never arrived…"
"Did he not look for them?" Rey asked tremulously.
Leia sucked in a sharp breath and was suddenly unable to meet her eyes. "I counselled Luke not to. He had other priorities by then-his students, the Jedi temple…Ben. I know it was selfish but I needed him to focus his attention on my son, not to go chasing after ghosts. Ben was struggling, he wasn't sleeping well, he was acting strange, talking about seeing a young girl in his dreams and interacting with her as if she was real…" She rambled.
"What girl?" Rey had kept the bond open deliberately just like Ben had asked her to. It was why he had acquiesced to readily to his mother's condition that she speak to Rey alone. She was so connected to him she could feel his emotional pain bleeding into hers. His pain was her pain. And the woman sitting opposite was the cause of so much of it. Rey tried to stop her head spinning from all the fresh revelations as she felt Ben coming back to her. He was no longer willing to stay away. Whether Leia liked it or not, she was going to have to face her son.
A/N-thanks for reading!