Everybody and anything familiar belongs to Janet. Mistakes are mine. I wrote this chapter in honor of Veterans Day as a reminder that although they're home, they aren't always out of danger. The biggest "Thank You" to my entire 'Research Department' and to all our Servicemen and women who've made similar sacrifices.

Chapter 4

I woke up to the scent of cinnamon. Even being completely lights out, my nose recognized that dessert is within eating range. One feature on my face told the others to wake up, as one eye popped open to locate the source of the hunger-inducing smell. My right eye, still buried in my pillow, needed more convincing. The plate with a warmed caramel roll on it sitting on Ranger's pillow, but now being pushed closer, was what prompted everything awake.

"Morning, Babe."

I remember every single detail about last night/early this morning, and little parts of my brain and stomach are relieved to see Ranger up before me. It didn't go so well the only time I'd managed to wake up before him. Though, I can't complain about what happened after I accidentally disturbed him on many levels. Our 'bed' time following the moment I shattered his peace by shutting the window was incredible ... even better than all the other times Ranger and I got naked together. What we've shared in this house has been ... more, as in it's been less about sex and more about claiming and loving each other.

The scent of Bulgari became even more tempting than breakfast. I'd been working so soundly on some quality REM sleep, I obviously didn't hear him get up or the shower running. He had pulled on a pair of cargo pants, but his chest and feet are still bare. I became really interested in a drop of water that fell from his towel-dried hair and had started a trek down his cheek and neck before getting lost in the muscles of his chest. A voyage I was up for repeating with my mouth, but Batman had other plans.

"You seemed to be enjoying your walk home before I ended it, are you up for another one?" He asked. "I need to move. I can show you around the place before the weather changes."

I smiled as I flipped onto my back and stretched my arms over my head. Though the blankets are still covering ninety-five percent of my body, I saw Ranger's eyes flare as the covers shifted along with my body.

"I thought I got in a pretty good workout last night, I mean this morning, but I'm happy to take a walk with you. You're way more interesting to talk to than myself."

He gave me a slight grin and any residual tension I was carrying was distracted by his smile too. He put his hands on the mattress on either side of my hips and leaned into my space.

"Rest assured, you provided both a mental and physical workout, Steph, which made going to sleep and wanting to wake back up possible." He put his knee on the mattress so he could get close enough to press a kiss to my lips. "Thank you."

I curled my arms around his neck so he couldn't pull away from me. "I've never been thanked for wanting to jump a guy's bones before, but if my sudden bout of lust for you helped you feel better ... you're welcome."

His grins aren't nearing a hundred-watts yet, but they're slowly but surely getting there. "You don't know how good you are for me."

"Maybe not, but you can fill me in on our property tour. I want to see how much of these woods are Rangeforest."

I kept the sheet tucked against me and scooted to the edge of the bed so I'd be completely covered when I stood up.

I could hear amusement in his voice when he spoke. "Shy, Babe?"

I glanced over my shoulder at him. "No, smart. I may feel good to you at night, but I'm still a woman who has a scar on her ass from a run-in with a bullet. You could say this sheet is acting as a public service."

Instead of getting the laugh I'd intended, his full lips tilted down in a frown. "You've seen all of my scars. And if I'm recalling the night correctly, you kissed every one of them."

"Yeah, but you're a guy. It's a well-known fact that multiple scars make you more of a man. They're a touchable reminder that you survived, which makes me love them more because you did live in order to have them."

Before I knew what he was doing, he grabbed my arm and ran his tongue up the burn scar on my arm courtesy of Abruzzi's twisted mind.

"And this isn't?" He asked.

"A hot poker wasn't going to kill me, and I wouldn't have bled out from an ass or arm graze," I pointed out. "Your wounds were different and more serious on all counts."

"To you maybe, but Abruzzi, Ramirez, Jimmy Alpha, Ramos, Scrog, and a whole fucking list of others would have killed you if they hadn't been stopped, so I see the marks on your body as reminders that I still have you with me. Be proud of, not embarrassed by, them."

That's sweet to hear, but I'm still not walking butt-naked to the bathroom.

"Having said that, you now have nothing to hide yourself," I warned him. "On your body or what's going on inside it."

"I'm not the one cocooned in a flat sheet."

"Of course you aren't. You're already half-dressed. You don't need to be."

Thankfully, he didn't call bullshit and he let go of me to grab my breakfast. "We'll come back to this topic later. You can eat the bun while you get dressed."

"I thought you'd be relaxed, ergo less bossy, this morning," I muttered, as I made it past the king-sized bed.

No surprise, Ranger moved faster than I ever could have and grabbed a handful of sheet to pull me to him.

"You should know better," he said before his mouth slammed down on mine.

I tasted his love for me, his need to focus on something positive, and how important I am to him. Needless to say, I quickly forgot about my scars and didn't even notice that he'd picked me up and deposited me in the bathroom. His lips left mine and it took me a few seconds before I realized he'd put me down by the shower, sans body-covering, and then went back for my food.

"I'll finish getting dressed and then go put the coffee on," he reappeared and told me. "Don't waste time putting on makeup. You're beautiful without it."

He was already walking back out of the bathroom, focused on covering his muscles with a shirt after putting my plate on the vanity, so I thought I was alone.

"Spoken like a guy who just got lucky," I muttered.

His head reappeared in the doorway. "No, spoken like the man who loves you. You have fifteen minutes before I come back and help."

I turned on the hot water before I turned on him. "Promise or threat?"

He considered the question. "Yes," he told me, before putting on socks, boots, and a shirt, to go make the much-needed coffee.

I walked into the kitchen twelve minutes later. I spared five minutes to blast my hair with my hairdryer assuming the outside temperature hadn't morphed into Spring or Summer numbers overnight.

Ranger handed me a travel mug, and while I took a sip he held up a Rangeman jacket for me to put on.

"It's much cooler today than it was yesterday. Your jacket won't be warm enough," he informed me, draping one of his around my shoulders. "This one will do the job."

Since it had to fit his big body, it was huge on mine so all I had to do was move my arms up an inch to slip them into the sleeves.

"I'm surprised you'd offer up a jacket over the use of your body to keep me nice and toasty," I teased, as he zipped me up so I wouldn't have to put my coffee down.

He dipped his head and gave me a preview of how he'd go about warming me up. "The jacket will keep your front warm when I'm plastered to your back, your back comfortable when I pull you in close for a kiss, and both a normal temperature when you're tucked into my side."

Now being high on hormones and caffeine, I'm not at all worried about an Autumn chill. I kept that position up until he opened the back door for me and I almost got knocked back into the kitchen by a gust of cold air with a simultaneous leaf shower.

"Okay, give me something," I said turning back to Ranger. "An arm, half of your body, a portable heating unit."

"You'll get acclimated in a few minutes," he promised, but he did put an arm around me and pull me tight against his side. "Once we start moving, you'll warm up quickly."

I didn't like the sound of that. "You said walk, right? You're not springing a mountain climb on me, are you?"

"Rigorous hike? Yes. Mountain summit? No."

I nodded. I can handle that. I'm not Ranger-fit, but I can get distracted by my surroundings and the company and mostly forget that I'm exercising. And distracted I was. Despite Jersey and Mother Nature doing an about-face overnight, Ranger let me lead us along the path circling the lake. Every red, orange, or yellow leaf that fell off a tree and into the water, I felt took one more worry off my shoulders with it. Although I came here for Ranger, for the first time in my life I feel like I actually belong somewhere. As dumb as it sounds, I also know I belong to - and with - the man at my side.

That didn't stop me from aiming a glare at him as we left the lake and took an overgrown trail into the interior of Ranger's land that butted-up against the State forest surrounding it. Although I'm being careful, trying not to spook the deer that had breakfast on their minds, I sound like a grizzly bear pulling a metal chain wrapped around a stream roller. My Cat boots managed to crush every dry leaf and snap all the twigs in our path, while Ranger was every inch an Army Ranger in full stealth-mode. He made no sound at all. If I wasn't glued to him, I'd swear he'd bailed on me.

"Why aren't you making noise?" I had to ask.

I tried to ignore the fact that I sound out of breath when I talk. Leave it to Batman to own hills which bordered on mini-mountains that needed to be crossed. He really needs to look into acquiring some prairie land.

"I can see where I should put my boot," he unhelpfully explained.

I couldn't help it, I had to pull him to a complete stop. I looked down at the forest floor and saw only an unending carpet of multicolored leaves that had been covering the trees just yesterday.

"We're looking at the same thing right?" I asked. "Leaves and dirt? Do you have x-ray vision or something?"

"No. I'm just trained to know that if you make one wrong move, you're dead. So every movement of my body is deliberate."

"That sounds exhausting," I admitted, trying to picture how I'd cope if everything I did throughout the day had to be carefully planned first.

I can't even make a lunch decision until five minutes before I'm about to eat it.

He shrugged. "It's second nature now. I don't have to think about it, it's an automatic response."

I felt better about that, but not by much. I always say he's the best, but I forget sometimes about all the time, energy, and sacrifice, he's put into becoming who he is. I didn't know how to tell him how much his dedication is appreciated and freakin' respected, so I just hugged him harder.

We fell into a comfortable silence as he led me on a loop around his space. It wasn't a total strenuous walk, but I struggled to keep up with his long legs and enviable stamina. Like I told him back at the house, I consider spending the night with him a workout, and he definitely didn't disappoint in that department. But that knowledge makes me a little crazy because I know he's slowing his normal pace to accommodate me ... even as I'm trying to speed my butt up so he can walk off whatever he needs to.

I pulled him to a stop again when we came across what looks like a lifeguard tower in the middle of nowhere.

"Oohh, what's that?" I asked him, letting Ranger go for the first time during our walk in order to investigate.

"It's a fire tower on the park's side," he answered. "As recent times have proven, it's better to be able spot a wildfire before it has a chance to get going, than to try to put one out that's taking out acres by the second. They install a 'fire lookout' in these towers during fire season in an attempt to catch any blaze early on."

"They don't anymore" I asked.

He looked like he wanted to shrug. "They do, but it's now a question of what money's available to cover someone monitoring every place that could use it."

"Is it safe to climb? And will I get into trouble for trying anyway?"

"Play away, Babe."

The section of my brain dedicated to him thought he may like a little innocent distraction. And before the rational less fit side of me could stop it, I heard myself issuing a challenge.

"Last one to the top has to give the other a massage before bed."

He gave me a wolf grin. "Don't we both win in that case? If your hands are on me, it'll be only be a matter of seconds before mine are on you and vice versa."

"Okay, so I didn't really think that through." I paused. "Or maybe I did, since I enjoy it a little too much when we're within touching distance of each other. So let's just climb the thing for the heck of it. I wish I'd grabbed my cell so I could take a picture from the top. The view has to be amazing."

"I have mine with me." He walked to the base of the tower and gestured for me to grab onto the ladder ahead of him. "Ladies first."

"Nice try. You just want to be behind me in case I start to fall, right?"

"It crossed my mind. Plus I get to stare at your ass the entire way up. A win/win in my mind."

I laughed. "Pervert," I teased, but I do feel better knowing he'll be there to catch me if I do slip.

I grabbed hold of a wooden ladder rung and started to climb, feeling Ranger's shoulder against the back of my thighs as I did. I found a trespassing-climb to be more fun than a hike and we reached the top in no time. I made a 'gimme' move with my hands for his phone as he was already in the process of handing it over.

My expectation held. We can see miles of trees from this vantage point that look like Lisa colored them using only red and yellow crayons. Ranger's arms came around me and he secured me to the tower by hooking his fingers over the edge of the railing. I found myself effectively sandwiched between his big body and the tower's structure as I took a few shots to capture this moment so we could remember it for years to come.

Mary Lou would never believe this without photographic evidence. And now I also have photos to send to Tank just to annoy him. He'll be happy to hear that Ranger's okay, but he won't give a shit about Fall foliage. I mentally shrugged. It's his loss. He needs help figuring out that keeping yourself alive is different than knowing how to live. Ranger humored me by coming up here, but I can tell it's a good moment for him too.

The devil on my shoulder had me texting Tank, making sure to let him know that I'm the one sending him stuff he could care less about, with pictures captioned with stupid stuff like ... "Ranger and I admitted that we love each other, you're next to take the 'Fall'" and "Autumn you happy to hear from me?"

"Are you teasing Tank?" Ranger asked, resting his chin on my shoulder so he could read the screen along with me.

I felt his grin form as we both read the immediate text back, which effectively answered his question. "Give the phone back to the Boss and quit bugging me," Tank replied. "I'm busy."

"He's cranky," I needlessly informed Ranger. "He really needs some fresh air and a weekend away like this."

"Or a woman who understands him in the same way you get me."

"Don't tell me that. I'll have him hooked up inside of a week. Not all Burgers are busybodies or bitches."

"Relax, Steph. He has time before he's ready for what we have, but it wouldn't hurt to start the vetting process. He claims to worry about me, but the feeling's mutual. I have you and Julie. He only has me and Rangeman."

"First off, you can never be called an 'only' anything. And he has me too."

"I'm sure he'd love to hear that."

"He won't," I said, "but he's stuck with me anyway." I glanced around the small cabin they'd build for the top of the fire tower. "I suppose if this were a training maneuver, this is when you'd rappel down?"

"Yes. But I left my gear at home. You can just follow me down."

I did as I was told, and being the showoff he is, Ranger kept one hand wrapped securely around my ankle until we hit dirt again. He didn't have climbing gear, but I had him to get me safely down. No doubt the 'Spiderman shit' he'd mentioned when we were first getting to know each other, wasn't actually a joke. I bet if I weren't here, he'd just swing or fly down.

"That was fun," I told him, while I attached myself to his midsection again.

I've spent years putting distance between us, now I can't tolerate even an inch of air separating our bodies.

"It was. It's different getting a workout from goofing off than busting your ass in a gym."

"Stick with me, Batman, and I'll take you places … or at least give you a new way of seeing things or just an excuse to goof off."

"I have no doubt you will. You've already made this anniversary one I've been able to tolerate."

"Good. I didn't know your guys, but I do know that anyone who's known you long enough to become a friend, wants you to live … and live larger and louder for them."

I'm confident I'm speaking the truth. No one who loves Ranger wants him to suffer, but I could have bit my tongue clean off when I suggested we take a more neglected path back towards his house, which I soon learned led to a small family cemetery.

"Oh, shit. I'm sorry," I said at the first glance I got of the headstones. "I never would've suggested this way if I'd known." That had me pausing. "You know this is here, you should have pushed me in the opposite direction. Why didn't you?"

"Everyone deserves to be mourned, Babe. I hate that I can't save everyone I'm responsible for, but the deeper tragedy would be my men dying - even those still living - and being forgotten. The couple who sold this place to me, did so on the condition that they still be allowed to visit their relatives whenever they need to. I respected them more for making that a clause in the transaction."

"You are such a good guy," I whispered, noting how well-kept the graves are. It's as if he ordered the leaves and dead branches to fall somewhere else. "You hired someone to keep the graves pristine, didn't you?"

He shrugged. "Someone had to."

"Trust me, not everyone would take on the upkeep of someone else's family. You are a special man. And this just got added to the reasons why I love you so friggin' much."

He ignored my praise, which I was okay with because I know he felt it. I ran my fingertips along the names and dates etched into the stone. A WWI veteran, a two-year-old child, and an obviously revered matriarch, were among those loved by the Hastings family. It's weird, but I actually feel jealous of the bond that put them here. This family loved each other, I can feel it coming off the stone.

"You say you always have two guns and a knife on you," I said to him. "If that's true, can I have the knife?"

He stilled. "Are you mad at me for something?"

I shook my head. "Nope."

He nodded and then produced a knife so scary looking, I was afraid I'd lop a finger off instead of the few branches full of red berries I'd wanted that were winding around a nearby tree. I managed to get one free before Ranger took over and cut more of the vine than I needed to form berry crosses that I laid on every one of the graves.

Ranger didn't point out that it's an odd thing to do for someone who swears she isn't religious, but I felt his question when his eyes landed on me.

"Grandma Mazur would kill me if I was standing in a cemetery and didn't pay my respects in some way."

I looked at my handwork and felt a pain in my chest that surprised me.

"I'll lose it if you cry, Steph. So dial back the emotion a little," I heard from behind me.

"Sorry, I only have the Burg-approved level of grief as a barometer of how to feel here. This place feels sad, but also happy … like the family loved this place as much as I do."

"They do. I had to swear in front of a judge, another member of the Hastings family, not to bulldoze the house and scalp the land."

I nodded. "Good for them. People like us need to know places like this exist."

"People like us?" He asked, steering me out of the family plot and back onto the path home.

"Yes. Your brushes with death are scarier than mine, but I do know that anyone who's experienced any level of hell would appreciate a peaceful place to retreat to in order to deal with it."

He didn't say anything for at least fifty steps, but when he did … I felt it clear down to my steel-toed boots.

"You are an incredible woman, Stephanie Plum."

"I disagree. I just have a heart. I hate that people are ripped away from their families, but I also love seeing how their love and devotion can be carried over, whether it's in the form of another generation or decorating graves of a past one." I shook my head at myself. "Thank God Tank and the guys can't hear me now, or I'd be the butt of their jokes for the rest of the year."

"Or they'd unwisely try to fight me for you and lose. It's a heady feeling knowing that someone understands you … all of you."

"I'm only interested in helping them. I'm solely committed to loving you. When we head back to Rangeman, the guys had better look out. As the Boss' partner in crime and in the bedroom, I have way more freedom to help them through whatever I can. After hours, I'm all yours."

Ranger pulled me close for a kiss, and when he let us both breathe again I felt I just earned a medal.

"Believe me when I say … they'll appreciate your interest in them."

"Of course I'm interested in what they're interested in or feeling/saying. Who wouldn't be?"

"You'd be surprised how little we're thought of. We've risked our lives every day for people we'll never meet, but we typically only get recognized for that dedication one or two days out of the year. If only they knew how many of our own days we've handed over for them to enjoy."

"I can't say I know what your life is like, but I wouldn't want one without you in it. I know there's someone out there for each of the guys that will feel the same way. I bet the families of your guys, wouldn't have traded the men they love for a lifetime with them."

"It's a thought you don't allow yourself to think until you're told your other half is gone," he told me.

"But it has to be something they've already thought of, like I have every time you've gone in the wind. I don't like it, but I love you for always wanting to put yourself between the bad guys and the rest of us. It seems pretty simple in my mind … you fight for us, and we support you before, during, and after, you do."

"I love you, Steph," he told me.

"I know. I'm not lying when I say it's the one thing in my life that I've never doubted."

His hideaway house was sorta in sight when we felt the first few drops of rain fall.

"It's going to downpour soon," Ranger informed me. "You may want to run if you don't want a second shower."

"I won't melt," I said over my shoulder, but damn it if I didn't haul ass to the safety of the back porch.

Ranger produced the necessary key and I let out a sigh of relief as we made it inside right before the floodgates opened above us.

"Seriously, you have a secret phone line to God, don't you?" I asked, as I took my borrowed jacket off and gave it to him to hang back up wherever he got it from.

"It'd be helpful, but no. I can just read the sky …"

"Like you do me?"

He moved in close. "You, Stephanie, are nothing that I've seen or experienced before."

I felt oddly proud of that.

He lowered his head and kissed me, just because he knows he's allowed to do it anytime he wants to now, I'd guess. He lifted his head and looked directly in my eyes to gauge the havoc he'd just wreaked on my hormones with that kiss.

"We can make this an extremely early bedtime," he teased.

My face must look exactly like how I feel, totally in love with him and not opposed to being back in bed with him.

"As tempting as that sounds ... and you have no idea just how tempted I am to drag you upstairs and attack you in the romantic sense ..."

"Now I'm curious, how would you go about romantically attacking me?" He asked, curling his hand around the nape of my neck and tugging my mouth back to his.

Okay, I'm not an idiot ... I leaned into him and let him try to distract me from my original goal.

"Damn," I breathed against his lips when he released mine. "This is going to be harder than I thought."

He nudged his hips forward so I could feel exactly what one kiss could do to him.

"I don't know, Babe. I don't think this can get any harder."

"Oooh, that's a challenge I plan on taking on later, but you've been willing to talk about stuff you normally don't share with anyone, and I want to take full advantage of it. Do you have any video or pictures of your friends? We can have our own private day of remembrance for them."

I was partially kidding just to let him know that I'm here to listen if he has a few stories he wants to tell, but I was shocked when he reached behind him to get out his wallet. He unfolded it and produced a flash drive from inside the depths of weathered leather.

"I seldom keep memorabilia from where I've been or what battles I've been involved it, but I will allow myself documented time with people I'm invested in."

I wanted to take the focus off him so he could prepare himself for what he was about to do, so I tugged him into the living room and turned playful.

"There's going to be nothing but hours of you guys playing football or pranks on each other on there. Am I right?"

He gave me a slight grin and hip-checked me onto the couch while he went to set up our movie night. "There's more than just football," he informed me.

I scooted over so he could sit beside me, but that didn't feel close enough for my liking. Once he had the remote in his hands, I curled up next to him and used his left thigh as a pillow. I'll be able to feel whatever he's feeling from my position, at least his physical reactions anyway. I don't have his psychic ability.

I found out what he meant pretty quickly. The first fifteen minutes were of recorded 'well-check' calls between Ranger and one or all of his buddies. I've heard the RangeGuys say that if one of them is having a bad day, they all are. But I never understood exactly what they were trying to tell me until I was allowed to 'listen in' on one of Ranger's 'Are you doing okay?' calls.

It was physically painful to hear how each man began by saying some version of an 'I'm good' answer, but then started to share their struggles when Ranger hit them with his silent stare. He instinctively knew when they needed to get something off their chests or when they'd be good with just a call from him to show that they are important to someone.

I started chewing on my thumbnail to keep my emotions tucked in. This is about - and for - Ranger and I'm not about to let him think he needs to comfort me. Thankfully, there was some footage of a backyard football game, and a cameo by someone's grandmother who wasn't in a hurry to leave her grandson alone when she realized he was talking to Ranger, to break up some of the heartbreaking discussions.

"Are you hogging my boyfriend?" I heard the grandma ask offscreen.

"No, my Abuelita. Clearly the big boss called just to see and speak to you."

"Well, that's definitely Cirus and his grandmother," I said to Ranger. "Do I still have competition for your affection, or has she found another online boy toy?"

"She kept her hand in mine during Cirus' funeral and the other one didn't stray, so she's decidedly less dangerous than your grandmother."

I wanted to laugh at the truth of that, but I found myself wondering what Grandma would be feeling if she had to watch me or Valerie be buried. I didn't like the thought or the images flooding my brain, so I switched them off and focused back on the TV. My heart broke with one quick snap when a man proudly showed Ranger that his daughter had started walking by the time they'd all returned home, panning the camera to show the wobbly walk of a tiny blond princess. Literally. Baxter Baines' baby girl was in full princess-gear. Now she doesn't have a daddy anymore.

I wanted to jump into the TV and pause time so they'd still be alive and busy telling Ranger about the lives they live separate from the one they and he share.

I hope Ranger didn't feel the tears seeping into the material under my head. I've arrested men and women who didn't deserve the jail space they were given, yet I'm watching footage of five of the Country's best who sacrificed everything they had to give ... even their lives in the end. It wasn't fair or right, but I know what Ranger would say if I said that out loud … that some things are worth the risk. They didn't enlist with a list of conditions. If they were needed somewhere … they went and would never regret doing so.

I stopped hearing the rain or the voices coming from the TV as I glanced towards the ceiling to say my own "Thank You" to them, and to those who went before them and would come after them. I couldn't have saved Ranger's team, but then and there I promised Sandros Torres, Simon Butler, Samir Harris, Baxter Baines, and Roberto Cirus, that I will take excellent care of Ranger for them.

Ranger hadn't narrated the videos, in fact he didn't say anything at all unless I asked him something. The only way I could tell he was feeling something stronger than usual is when the fingers that were absently separating my curls as we both watched the screen, tightened briefly before letting go and resuming the finger-combing.

When the pictures faded and the TV screen went abruptly dark, I lifted my head off Ranger's lap and sat my ass on him instead, wrapping my arms around as much of his body as I could hold. Before he could fully get lost in the sudden silence that to me felt like he just lost them all over again, I held on tight and buried my face in his skin. I kissed the pulse of life beating in his neck to remind him that while I can't go back in time to make sure he didn't lose his buddies, he'll always have me to help him celebrate the men they were and the lives they led, while I also try to ease the pain he feels in their honor.