The door slammed shut and Merlin bolted through, stopping only to drop his bag on the table. He began to quickly pace back and forth across the room fidgeting his hands together in front of his face and occasionally touching it.
"Merlin, what's wrong?" Gaius asked, his mouth curving into a subtle frown.
Merlin jerked around to face him, and only then did Gaius see the tears brimming at his eyes, and faded stains on his cheeks.
"I can't do it Gaius, I can't do it." Merlin said, "Not anymore. I'm finished."
"Calm down, Merlin." Gaius said, "Sit."
Merlin immediately sat on Gaius's bed, his palms moving to cover the sides of his head, the bases of which met in the center of his forehead causing the covering of his eyes. The slight shake that had taken to Merlin was almost imperceptible. Gaius took a seat beside him.
"Now," Gaius said noting the tension in the young sorcerer's body, "What happened?"
"I-" Merlin winced with what looked almost like pain, and immediately Gaius started looking him over for any injuries.
"I'm fine Gaius, I'm not been injured."
"You're shaking like a drowned rat." Gaius said, "Now tell me, what on earth is bothering you so?"
"I can't lie anymore, Gaius." Merlin said, "Not to Arthur, not to anyone else."
"But you've done so well in keeping your secret, Merlin," Gaius said, "to have your powers revealed now would be a death sentence, surely you know that."
"Arthur- he asked me today- about what I thought he should do about... about the magic and I- He told me he was beginning to doubt magic's evil, but I knew it was only because of Morgana and I- I had to..."
"What did you say, Merlin?"
"I- I told him there can be no place for magic in Camelot." Merlin said, his voice breaking. The torture in his voice was clear. "Gaius, I- I had to- because Morgana and- "
His face grew blank, and as the realization approached, tears flooded his cheeks.
"I'll never be free."
A/N: So this is only intended to be a one-shot. But I think I can see this maybe going further. I don't know. Tell me if you think it should.