fandom: full metal alchemist
title: kizu.
pairing: ed and ?
rating: pg-13
description: (AU) The mind can be tricked to do many things, but the heart never forgets what's been already etched there to last through anything. Even death itself.
(Note: Rating due to sexual content. Also, if you don't like couples with a large age gap or yaoi between two brothers, you have been warned.)

Disclaimer - Full Metal Alchemist / Hagaren no Renkinjutsushi doesn't belong to me. I just love it too much. The poem is mine though.

kizu.
By miyamoto yui

Part 1 - a link of chains of all kinds.

"Elegantly dressed in shreds,
A fashion yet to be addressed,
it is a matter of being undressed.

A pet, a slave, a darling,
what is the name you call me?
There is no definition, is there?
We dance and slaughter
with no worries of the consequences.

If you call me again,
I'll bite your tongue off
and consume the flesh and soul,
and nothing will be left.
Not even evidence
of what "existed".

And yet, I follow with that melody
of that murderous voice,
like a drug, wanting to commit suicide.

Little by little,
I'm dying,
left at your feet.

You stare at me
as if you've always known me.
That isn't true.
No, not at all.
I smile enigmatically.

You will come back for me
And when you do.

My body is cleaned away.
As if, I was never there.

Happy tidings.
Go crazy with and without me."

As I rotated my wrist, the plum wine that was submerged somewhat in ice was swishing around the cylindrical shaped glass. I watched the stage with confused eyes, watching the girl with the strong voice and those dark brown eyes leave the stage as quietly as she had entered. Like a frightened bird, her fragile figure had dazzled the audience with her powerful, melodious cry from the invisible wires of her cage of a stage.
I put my glass down on the wooden counter and closed my eyes for a moment.

"Do I know this song?"

My head was starting to hurt a little.

It was that song. That song made me think of something that maybe shouldn't have sparked such a strong reaction out of me.

And my heart began to beat faster and faster to its temptatious beat.

Desperately, I held onto the drink and carefully drank it. But somehow, a little dribbled down the side of my mouth and down my neck. I felt like it made a line on the side of my face and down onto my shirt.

"Let me wipe that off for you."

Immediately, I gasped and opened my eyes. I felt a little disoriented and it wasn't because of the drink.

"It's that voice again," I mumbled to myself, half troubled and half in yearning.

I took some money from my pocket and paid the bartender. Then, I held onto the handle of my small black bag, lifted it off the seat next to me, and left the bar.

Again, in the middle of nowhere and on a not-so-starry night, I walked out onto the desert to where my heart would lead me. But I held half of my face in pain while my feet automatically trudged on, immune to the inflictions flowing throughout my body and pumping into my heart.

I walked until it was almost time for the dawn to come. I took refuge on a little hill of sand and pressed my back onto it. I closed my tired eyes, but I was scared.

Every time I closed my eyes, there was that silhouette reaching out to me. Then, I would dream of being in a desert city.

The same disturbing dream would repeat from time to time. I would be running around with black clothing as if I were a priest. My red cape would be flowing in back of me while I held my white gloves in tight fists. Faster and faster would I run while frantically looking up and down the streets with the desert people peering at me suspiciously.

But I would keep on running after that silhouette, a shadow of something familiar yet unusual at the same time.

I'd shout out Al's name, but the figure would never hear me.

"AL~!"

I would end up waking up to the sound of my own screaming.

And then, the dawn's light would hit me with the encroaching, sweltering heat starting to crawl onto my skin. I'd catch my breath, slowly get up and work hard at walking all over again.

Why were the journeys I embarked upon always so perilous?

I began to think about where I started from and took a deep breath. My eyes became more focused, filled with the strength and firm concentration I gave to everything and everyone I ever encountered in my life.
It was the only thing that saved me from falling out of existence within myself.

For, when I came back, there was a grand theatre spread before my eyes. And I was its lonely actor.
There was no one to greet me. I was overcome with fear that everyone had forgotten me even if I had thought of them every second I was 'gone'.

Like any world, life would go with or without you.

And I left with a strong resolve to find the people I left behind…

…and to the self that had been in suspended animation.

I took out a small pin and poked my finger. On one of the white walls of the many buildings of that underground city, I picked a house that I would push my index finger onto.

Like a child, with red paint bleeding out of me, I put my name there.

Then, I turned around to head towards home.
I was confident that he, of all people, was surely waiting for me.

Step by step, my braid felt like a link of chains binding me to the place I appeared from...

Tsuzuku…

Author's note: This was supposed to be a one-shot, but it turned out to be a multi-chapter fic because I wanted to emphasize the impact of each part that I thought was significant. I thought long and hard about this fic everyday for about two weeks now, so I wanted it to hit as many points as it should have.

Kizu - could stand for 'cut' or 'bond'. (I like puns, as you already know.)

Saturday, February 26, 2005
1:52 AM