Good news: I am not dead!

I understand if you thought I was. I haven't posted for months! Nevertheless, I am still among the living. I was just busy preparing for a writers conference that has been CANCELED.

Not like I didn't see it coming, but still.

Ok, they POSTPONED it. But since I don't know the new date, same diff.

What did you have planned for this month that was canceled due to COVID-19?

(Which, btw, very serious. If you need an example of exponential growth to show your kids or that one person who just won't get it, there's an excellent one on my profile. Unfortunately, I can't claim full credit for it-I heard it from a very smart lady I know.)

plans

|||||||||chloe|||||||||

"It's in the rabbit," I say confidently.

"Uh-huh," Rena Rouge scoffs.

"Which one?" asks Coccinelle. "There are like a jillion."

"Um…" I don't actually know which one.

"The first one, of course!" says Carapace. "Didn't you say it was biting people, du- Coccinelle?"

Thank you, Carapace. "Yes. The first one. That's what I was about to say before you so rudely interrupted me. Carapace."

Carapace rolls his eyes.

"First rabbit. Of course," says Coccinelle. "...does anyone remember which one is the first one?"

I roll my eyes. "Duh, no. Like, none of us were here before they turned into a swarm. Ridiculous."

Coccinelle sits down on the roof, closing her eyes. Wth is she doing?

((((((((((sabrina)))))))))

I open my eyes. "Here's the plan."

Eight eager eyes fix on my face. I gulp, glance at the rabidly- oops, rapidly- approaching flood of rodents, and tell them my plan.

[[[[[[[[[[adrien]]]]]]]]]]

"Mirage!" Rena Rouge yells. She plays a tune I've never heard before and hurls an illusion towards Rabid White.

Except….there's nothing.

I wrinkle my nose. Oh, wait…. Her illusion is the ...incredibly tempting… scent...

-no no no! That is so wrong. No ew yuck yuck yuck bad Chat!

"...I can't smell anything…" Queen Bee says.

I wrinkle my nose. "Be glad you can't. Rena, that is so wrong."

She shrugs, and points at the swarm of rabbits heading toward Rabid White. "It's working."

"Eeew," says Coccinelle. "At least I was right? Lucky Charm!"

A huge black-spotted pillow lands in her hands.

"What am I going to…" She stares into space for a moment before her gaze lands on my hands. She begins to smile. "Chat. When I say 'now', I'll need you to rip this completely open. Shred it like cheese."

I nod, bemused. "O...kayy…"

"Bee, when he does I'll need you to use Venom on the akuma. While he's paralyzed, I'll recharge, and find the rabbit. Chat, Rena, and Carapace, you'll keep the rabbits distracted. Charge up as needed, just so long as they stay distracted."

We all nod.

Coccinelle uses her yoyo to hurl the pillow toward the akuma. I run after it, using my baton to keep from landing in rabbits.

"Ca-"

"No Cataclysm!" Coccinelle screams.

I snatch the pillow and shred it. "Aaa...aaa...choo! Achoo! Hhaaarchooooo!"

Eyes watering, I still manage to think, at least the akuma's allergy is worse than mine.

((((((((((sabrina))))))))))

"What's your plan, Sabrina?" Tikki asks.

I chew my lip and tell her. "Do you think it'll work?"

Tikki pats my cheek with a kwami paw that feels like butterfly wings. "I have faith in you, Sabrina!"

Which isn't a yes, but I'll take it. "Tikki, spots on."

Recharged, I run back out. "Anyone have any clues-"

Wordlessly, a blinking-combed Queen Bee points at the stark white bunny rabbit with purple ears that Rena is chasing after. Carapace holds the bunnies back, while Chat is nowhere to be seen.

I scratch my shoulder awkwardly. "Ah. Yes. That would be a clue, wouldn't it? The ears."

Queen Bee nods. "I need to go recharge now, but I'll be back with Venom soon." She uses her trompo to swing off.

I look carefully at the rabbit and Rena, calculating. If...no. But then maybe...nope. Or...uh-uh. How about…?

Finally deciding on the age-old tactic of herding it, I jump down, aiming for where the bunny is headed.

For anyone wondering, the illusion Rena created was the scent of fresh human meat, along with an extra lot of tempting-ness. Since a cat would think it smells good...so does Chat, poor dear. The rabbits, of course, are Vorpal bunnies, a lá Monty Python. Since the puppet my dad once bought gave me nightmares every time I saw it, let us hope this is a good sign.