Greetings Mandalore-holics and True Believers, I have yet another "Archive Reject" for all of your enjoyment! For those of you familiar with the author Innortal, you know he has a series of Naruto and Bleach Time Loops- along with a rather well written Naruto/Stargate SG-1 X-Over fic. For those of you who do not browse the infamous TFF that I constantly talk about, he also has various "Time Loop" snippets for Harry Potter, Star Wars and Ranma 1/2. As he should, considering he was the one who started each of those threads.
Though I don't haven't followed those threads with any sort of regularity, I do have a few loops that I myself have written. These are mostly from either Harry or Naruto's POV's. I have one from Ichigo's POV, but only half of the entire loop was written by me and I am having trouble contacting the other guy to get permission to post his half of the Time Loop here on the Archive Rejects.
No matter, here are a series of Time Loops that I hope you all will enjoy!
This year was an irregularity.
First, many in the Wizarding World, Wizarding Britain especially, were buzzing with anticipation.
Harry Potter was going to start his schooling, more specifically, Hogwarts.
Of course being Harry Potter something had to be unusual. Most people found it disconcerting that when coming to Hogwarts he seemed rather bored. He did not hold the first time wonder held by those first years. It was almost as if he had seen it all before.
Another irregularity was the lack of excitement from the Sorting Hat. The hat was typically a cheerful object, but this year it hadn't been the case. It spouted out its' song in a lackluster manner, and then began sorting each student lazily. It was actually beginning to put people to sleep with a monotone voice that almost seemed to make Binns sound exciting.
Although watching Draco Malfoy's tirade after he was placed in Hufflepuff was rather amusing to watch. The glares he was currently receiving after he lost their House nearly 100 points promised pain.
Of course the reason why he only lost NEARLY a hundred points didn't help him out any, as the Headmaster awarded Draco 5 points for losing a record amount of points immediately after being sorted.
Finally, it came to the name many were waiting for.
"Potter, Harry!" called out the Deputy Headmistress.
"Did she say Harry Potter?"
"Harry Potter..."
"... Potter..."
Harry sighed and rolled his eyes and resigned himself to get sorted once more.
'Hello, Potter...' the bored Sorting Hat said.
'Wotcher, Hat...' Harry sighed.
'It's been a while since you've come back here, what are your plans for this loop?' the Hat asked conversationally. 'It's been rather boring without your usual mayhem around here.'
'Well... I haven't gone the Dark Lord route yet...' Harry contemplated, 'What do you think, Hat?'
'Could be interesting...' replied the Hat, 'You know, after all these loops, you've never asked what my name is.'
'Do you even have a name?' asked Harry incredulously.
'No, but that's beside the point, HP,' the Hat argued.
Harry chuckled as he rolled his eyes and shook his head, much to the bafflement of the others in the Great Hall.
'You know, we should probably get me Sorted...' Harry said he heard whispers from around the Great Hall. 'Which House should I be this time?'
'I could sort you into your own House,' suggested that Hat. 'And then give you your own Harem.'
'Tempting, but we did that the last two times,' replied Harry in deep thought. 'Besides, you've already sorted Daph, Sue, and 'Mione. We could always go the Gryffie route. No one would expect a Dark Lord from that house.'
'If you want inconspicuous, you might want to go the 'Puff route,' the Hat suggested another option.
'True... Of course we could always mess with their minds and put me in Slytherin,' Harry countered.
'Ah, but remember all the crap Severus put you through last time we tried that?' the Hat reminded Harry, 'Not to mention Dumbledore kept an awfully close eye on you. What about Ravenclaw? I did put the Granger girl there this time around.'
'It's always the quiet ones...' thought Harry in remembrance with a lecherous grin that was VERY out of place on an eleven year old.
'You do realize she's only eleven, right?' the Hat interjected.
Harry scowled. 'You're a real bastard sometimes, you know that, right?'
'And the frisky went away,' stated the Hat smugly.
'Of course she won't always be eleven...' replied Harry in an attempt to brighten his mood and feel like less of a pedophile.
'Whatever you tell yourself so you can sleep after you wank at night,' the Hat retorted.
'And here I was, considering taking you with me when I take over the world,' said Harry, 'But it looks like yet another loop where you'll have to do nothing but sit there collect dust inside the...'
'All right, all right! I get the point!' snapped the Hat, who then mumbled something about disrespectful, looping dark lord wannabes. 'I'll let you off the hook this time. I was right the first time we did this. You'd have done very well in Slytherin.'
'Now, now, no need to get your brim in a twist,' Harry placated the Hat. 'I'd say put me in Hufflepuff with Daph and Hannah, but you already put the amazing bouncing ferret there and I don't want him kissing my ass to be my friend this time around. Do you want to place another wager on whether or not Ron will make a bigger fuss than Draco when you put him in Slytherin again this time?'
'No bet.' said the Hat, 'Not only does that get old after a while, but you always win that one. How about how long it takes either his housemates or his brothers to make him snap completely?'
'Stakes?' inquired Harry.
'If I win, I get my own harem when you become the new Dark Lord,' stated the Hat.
Harry quirked an eyebrow, 'Not to put a damper on your side of the bet… But how would that work? I mean you don't exactly have a...'
'Who say's I don't?' asked the Hat smugly.
Harry's eyes widened at the implication. The Hat began to laugh hysterically until Harry ripped the Hat off his head screaming obscenities and stomping it into the ground before finally taking a seat at the Ravenclaw Table. He shuddered as he took as seat and then mentally cursed himself as he noticed his new Housemates giving him a wide birth.
"So much for not being unstable this time around..." he mumbled aggravated at himself. He lost 50 points for his outburst, but got 10 points for the most inventive string of obscenities heard in Hogwarts.
Of course the night capped off with Ronald Weasley being the first Weasley to not only NOT be sorted in Gryffindor, but ended up in Slytherin. He lost a whopping 125 points, but won back 30 points for losing more even more points than Malfoy and more creative use of obscenities than Harry.
He even had the Twins taking note at one point.
And thus began the scholastic career of the newest and, with luck, most fearsome Dark Lord in History. Harry Potter.
But that is another story...
Harry was ready for this.
He was going to end it once and for all.
It was going to be all over, for better, or for worse.
Or at least all would be finished for this particular loop.
Besides, he'd always wanted to see the look on ole snake face when he did something like this. Perhaps, when this was all over, he'd learn how to make pensieves so he could show Ichigo, Naruto and Ranma later in one of their infamous merged loops.
Things were definitely going his way this loop. His Godfather was free, Snape had been sacked and Dumbledore had managed to get each of the Horcruxes and have them destroyed. Hell, Harry even managed to get Cedric out of the damned graveyard in time.
All that was left was Voldemort and the Snake, as Harry had found ways in previous loops to deal with his little "scar" problem.
Everything was set. All was in place. The traitor Pettigrew was there. Members of Voldemort's Inner Circle were arriving and Snake Face was monologuing, whilst Nagini just laid near the cauldron, absorbing the ambient heat from the fire.
"Now, Potter... We duel..." said Voldemort confidently with a pleased smirk.
He tossed Harry back his wand, to which Harry gave him a very feral "Kenpachi-ish" grin.
"Any last words, Potter?" asked Voldemort smugly, though he was a bit unsettled seeing Harry's grin.
"Ban..." Harry half-whispered, a Snake-like mask began forming on his face. He then let out a mighty yell, "KAI!"
Harry was right; the look on Voldemort's face WAS priceless, as were the expressions of those of the Inner Circle.
The Vizard Who Lived was pretty sure that Wormtail wasn't the only one who had soiled himself right before his death...
"You know... The skills I've learned from your worlds have come in handy..." said Harry as he lay down on the beach.
Others in the troupe were Naruto, Ichigo, Shinji and Ranma. Each was relaxing for once in a loop. They had no plans for Harems, World Domination, Universal Destruction, Damsels in Distress, or Acts of Ultimate Heroism.
They were officially on vacation. And it was glorious.
"Hmm... Kawarimi was especially helpful this time around..." commented Ichigo.
"It's a good thing Harry had that Portkey ready and you taught us Shunpo, or else I don't think we'd have made it out of there," added Ranma to Ichigo.
"It feels good to relax, doesn't it? It's a good thing we're the only ones whose abilities transfer from world to world or else the girls would have caught up to us- or we'd have not gotten away at all," said Harry.
As fun as these loops could be, a guy just needed to take a break once and a while.
"I kind of feel sorry for Aang though..." said Naruto with a frown, "It is his world after all..."
Harry snorted. "His world, his problems. WE are on vacation."
"Harry's right. Sometimes sacrifices have to be made," said Ranma. "Besides, he's only been around for the last 15 or so Loops. He hasn't had to deal with Rei, Sakura, Anko and the others like we have."
They all collectively shuddered.
"Poor, poor Aang... He will be missed..." said Naruto as he lifted his drink in a solemn toast.
"May his sacrifice be remembered always..." said Shinji, also raising his glass, as did the others.
"He'll get over it in a Loop or 30... I don't think the girls could do anything to him too mentally or emotionally scarring," said Harry uncaringly.
The others nodded in agreement as they went back to their drinks ignoring the problems of the Loops and the Avatar World for as long as possible
This was the first time Harry had ever remembered coming back during this particular time, and it wasn't exactly the best time to comeback at all.
Of course that also meant he wouldn't have to deal with it later, nor would he be able to access his Vizard powers should he want to go Shinigami on people's asses this loop.
It wasn't the first time he had looped to the graveyard his fourth year. Only usually he was either tied to the stone, or just arriving by Portkey. Not once had he ever looped into the middle of a duel, especially not one with Voldemort, and not RIGHT before he was about to lock it up with the Dark Lord in Priori Incantatem.
Of course his sudden appearance in this loop had caused him to hesitate and all Harry would do was watch as a flash of green light was over him.
Galen Marek didn't know what to think. It was as if he'd awoken from a nightmare.
The last thing he remembered was dieing on the Emperor's New Space Station while starting a Rebellion. The next thing he knew, he was on Kashyyyk with his father.
It was surreal and he was content. However, he was also troubled. He tried to warn his father of the impending doom, but it was to no avail. It wasn't long before he was killed by Vader and there was nothing Galen could do about it. He just wasn't strong enough as he was now.
As much as he didn't want to make himself known to the Dark Lord, he tried to save his father.
He knew what was going to happen, yet he resigned himself to his fate.
Each day of grueling training, the torturous tasks set up by Vader, the harsh punishments for failure or not succeeding good enough. Though Galen tried to not let it both him, he honestly didn't know why he put up with it. Everything was going exactly as it had in his nightmare.
Why did he endure?
Why did he continue?
Why did he not lash out and kill Vader when he had every chance?
It was an answer that eluded him each time. He knew he was missing something, some important detail. He would remain in the dark for several years, not knowing his reason until he saw...
Her...
Juno Eclipse...
It was as if all the pieces of the puzzle were falling into place. He would endure. He would succeed. He would fight. Not for an idealist rebellion, or an act of petty revenge, but for her.
After their first encounter, he quickly realized she did not remember the things he did. Like Vader, she had no recollection of their previous meeting. But it didn't matter. He loved her and he knew, in time, she would share those same feelings and for now, it was enough.
He'd found his reason.
For those of you who didn't pick up on the subtle hint, this was Galen's First Time Loop.
Harry groggily woke up, noticing that something was different. His flat looked different for some reason. His penthouse was now a middleclass single roomed studio, where the bedroom, living room and kitchen were almost all a single room.
He had the essentials and a few 'luxury' items; electricity, running water, a television.
'Odd... When I loop back I'm usually either at or going to Hogwarts...' he thought to himself. He decided he'd figure it out later, for now he was going to have breakfast.
He opened up the refrigerator to find an odd sight. The only thing in there was half a carton of expired milk.
Harry frowned. 'I have a bad feeling about this...'
With trepidation, Harry closed the fridge and opened a nearby cupboard only to find...
Ramen.
Lots of it.
A full cupboard of it.
"Oh, HELL no!" he shouted. He slapped his head to his forehead and noticed two things.
First, much to his eternal joy, his scar was gone.
Second, much to his eternal horror, he was wearing a cap. A very familiar looking black sleeping cap with a face on it that he was very sure looked out of place on his messy raven colored locks.
Tearing it off his head, he ran to the bathroom to look at himself in the mirror.
As he confirmed earlier, the scar was gone, but that didn't mean he didn't have some other mark that would set him apart from others on his face. Or rather, six marks.
Still, despite his depressing plight, he did see one silver lining in the stormy cloud that was his new life.
"At least I'm not that Uchiha-bastard..." He shuddered at the thought of having to avoid dozens upon dozens of fangirls daily.
Looking at himself in the mirror, he guessed he was about 12 years old, meaning he would probably be graduating from the academy soon.
"I wonder if that Hinata girl has a crush on me in this loop."
She might be twelve now, but Harry had seen her when she grew up and he had heard from Naruto just exactly how kinky she could be. Unfortunately, before Harry could begin to formulate a plan to hook up with Hinata in a few years another presence made itself known.
"You know brat, I just think you like them young..." said the voice.
Harry's eyes widened as he recognized the voice and began looking around the apartment.
"Hat?"
"One and the same, though I guess you could call me Kyuubi," The 'Sorting Hat' snickered, as if holding back a hysterical bout of full blown laughter.
Harry groaned in disappointment, 'So much for an enjoyable vacation from the norm.'
At that thought, the "Sorting Hat", a.k.a. Kyuubi, let out a whole torrent of laughter that could only be heard by Harry.
Naruto looked around in confusion. He had awoken in a jungle, along with various other familiar faces within come of the more fucked up Time Loops. He was certain SOMEONE fucked up royally if they managed a new area that Naruto was sure was unfamiliar to them all. Along with his 15 yr old, ramen eatin', snake beatin', orange wearin', Hokage swearin' self was Harry Potter and Ranma Saotome looking very much the 17 they claimed to be when these repeats started, Col. Jack O'Neal, and some new guy wearing black pants and vest with a white shirt. He also had a strange sort of weapon at his waist that looked similar to that weird weapon thingy Jack called a 'gun'.
"Hey guys, look! We have another noob," Naruto pointed out. "Welcome to... Err... Wherever we are... I've never looped through here before... I'm Naruto Uzumaki! That, " he said pointing to Harry, "Is Harry Potter," he then pointed to Ranma, "Ranma Saotome and he is Col. Jack O'Neal." His finger moved over to Jack. "Who are you?"
"Han Solo," the rogue-ish man replied.
"You're kidding right?" asked Jack incredulously.
"You've heard of me?" asked Han with an arrogant grin.
"Kind of hard not to," Jack responded, "You're a character in a movie called 'Star Wars' in my reality."
Further interaction between Jack and Han was interrupted by Harry, "Guys... I've been here before... We need to leave!"
"Why?" asked Naruto.
"I've gotta bad feeling about this..." Han commented, as a giant roar rang out into the open air.
"Welcome to..." Harry said with a sigh, as giant footsteps seemed to get closer, "Jurassic Park."
Another roar was heard as a massive Spinosaurus emerged from the foliage.
Jack summed up everyone's thoughts.
"Son of a..."
The Spinosaurus roared once more before all of their fight or flight instincts kicked in and they all fled from the massive dinosaur.
Naruto once again found himself sitting on the Hogwarts Express. This time, with an eleven year old Harry, Yusuke Urameshi, Ranma Saotome and some "ninja" named Deadpool.
Seriously, how could HE call himself a ninja? He didn't have any sort of cool jutsu, no sealing scrolls, hell he couldn't even use chakra! Even Rock Lee could use SOME chakra!
Seriously, what type of fucked up universe do you come from where guys like HIM could become a ninja!?
Harry sighed, "So what do you guys think we should do this time around?"
"I think I'll compete in the Tri-Wizard tournament this time around," said Ranma in a bored tone.
"You want to take on ole snake face this time?" asked Yusuke.
"Well... I AM the one prophesized to do it, so I probably should..." said Harry in a non-committal tone.
"We should probably make sure the prophecy didn't change like that one time..." Ranma suggested.
THAT particular time loop hadn't ended well.
Naruto growled in frustration. "Why can't we get stuck in that 'Star Trek' world we saw on the T.V. in the resets in Jack's world!? They get into these timeloops all the time and are out of them in less than an hour!"
"Because then all these fanfiction authors out there, posting on that website called 'FanFiction dot Net' wouldn't have anything to write about if there was actually some sort of chance we'd be able to escape all these repetitive loops," Deadpool informed them.
The assembled group could only stare at Deadpool as if he'd grown a second head.