Let's rewind for a minute and catch up with Race and Phil…
There's some sauciness in here - but not big enough to edit out and warrant a separate outtake chapter. So I just left it in.
Race followed behind Phil as they made their way back to the FBI field office. He was feeling much clearer after their conversation. As much as he hated to admit it, Phil was right. Leading with anger would not help Jonny.
When they reached the door again, it was locked. When they tried to buzz in, there was no response.
"It is the middle of the night," Phil shrugged. "So they MAY not be ignoring us."
"Mmm," Race pursed her lips. Worrying about how the lawyer would get in. "Where's the garage?" he looked around and started jogging to find it before Phil could answer. Now Phil was the one following. "I'm sure someone is guarding that entrance."
"Bannon…" Phil warned.
"Your message was received," Race interrupted. "Now let me do my job."
"What happened to letting me do all the talking?" Phil grumbled.
"You know that was never gonna happen," Race laughed.
Phil rolled his eyes and picked up the pace. "What's your plan then?"
"Identify obstacles and then overcome those obstacles," Race threw back distractedly.
"Asshole," Phil muttered.
XXX
Phil sighed. "Well…unless your considerable charms work on inanimate objects now, I'd say we're fucked." They were at the top of a parking ramp, staring down at a closed garage door. It was clear that the only way through was with an access badge or if someone answered the intercom. There was also three cameras pointed at the door. Making any attempt to break through pointless.
Under normal circumstances, Phil would not be so defeatist. He would expect his team to make miracles happen and was willing to accept a certain level of collateral damage. But this situation was far from normal. He watched Race stare hard at the door and then come to the same conclusion. Brute force would not work. But Race moved on from that idea immediately, pulling out his phone and running back to street level.
"How close are you?" Race barked at whoever was on the line. "Great. How do you get in? Perfect. I'll meet you at the top of the ramp," he ordered. He did not ask. Hanging up the phone and crossing his arms impatiently. Annoyed that he would have to wait.
"Who was that?" Phil asked.
"Our ticket through obstacle one," Race told him.
Phil grinned and thought, not for the first time, that it would be nice to have Race in the field again. He improvised like no other. And when one option folded, he always found another in record time without being phased. It was impressive to witness and Phil had missed it.
XXX
Ruiz pressed the red button on the intercom with casual disinterest and waited for a response.
"Open the gate," Ruiz ordered. "I'm Mr. Quest's lawyer."
"Who's in the car with you?" the disembodied voice asked.
"My associates," Ruiz barked. "Open the gate." He rolled up his window before a response could come.
Race raised an eyebrow in approval when the gate lifted a moment later. "Effective," he praised.
"I've been here enough that they generally don't waste time bullshitting me anymore," Ruiz shrugged nonchalantly.
Race found himself wondering, but mostly hoping, that this lawyer was worth the money. Ruiz parked his Mercedes in the closest spot to the guard booth and then all three of them got out and approached with confidence.
"Identification and phones," the guard asked dully. They all handed their items over and waited while the guard made a call. "Someone will be down in a few minutes."
Race leaned against the nearest wall and allowed himself a brief moment to rest and think about Jessie. He wanted to be at her bedside, but knew with no doubts that she would want him here.
'We'll both be there soon, Ponchita.' He made the silent promise to himself and he intended to keep it.
They all stared at the elevator doors impatiently, waiting for their escort to arrive. When the doors finally opened, Race pushed off the wall and squared his shoulders. He recognized the two agents that had come for Jonny, but not the one standing between them. Phil stepped in front of him before he could do anything else.
"Alex," Phil greeted the man on a first name basis and stuck out his hand. "I guess congratulations are in order?"
"At least temporarily," Alex nodded. "Good to see you, Phil. But I am surprised. What brings you here at this hour?"
"I led the investigation after Bartlett resigned," Phil started. "Mr. Bannon was first on the scene. I assume you need our statements?"
"Yes," Alex acknowledged. "You could've waited for my call though. We're short-staffed at the moment. Since it's the middle of the night and all."
"Of course," Phil nodded. "But since we've made the trip, let's do it now. Mr. Ruiz is here for Jonny of course."
"And you're not?" Alex dropped all pretenses.
"Benton Quest can shut all this down with one call to the DOJ," Race cut through with authority. He did not feel like playing games. Or inter-agency politics. He wanted to get back to his kid.
"Then why hasn't Benton Quest done just that?" Alex challenged with a mocking tone.
"Because I haven't asked him to yet," Race threatened.
Alex took a deep breath. Considering how he wanted to handle the situation. "Agent Morris, please take Mr. Ruiz up. He has a reason to be here. Phil…Mr. Bannon," he looked at them both in turn. "We'll give you a call after the holiday. I'm gonna ask you to leave now."
"I'm not leaving without Jonny," Race said flatly.
"Bannon," Phil growled.
Race just stared back stubbornly. Playing a game of chicken with them all. Then he shrugged. "Benton gave Bartlett plenty of time to do the right thing before intervening. He's a fair man. You won't get the same courtesy from me. If you want to be the shortest Director or Interim Director in the Bureau's history…"
"Director Bartlett was doing his job," Alex defended. "Just because that didn't align with your agenda…"
"That's not what happened," Race cut in. "Bartlett made it personal."
"How can you say that right now with a straight face?" Alex asked without fear.
Phil put a hand on Race's shoulder and squeezed. "What's the harm in letting us wait upstairs, Alex? You need our statements anyway. We're not here to break the kid out," Phil finished with a laugh to lighten the mood.
Alex looked through Phil at Race. "This is the safest building in the city. He doesn't need a bodyguard." He said the word 'bodyguard' as if it was a lower form of work. Now Race was really pissed.
"I'd feel better if I made that assessment on my own," Race smiled thinly.
Alex pursed his lips. "So my choices are to let you upstairs or you go over my head?"
"No," Phil started.
"Yes," Race interrupted.
"Sounds like blackmail," Alex sighed.
"Sounds like a superior strategy," Race shot back and then pushed Phil's hand away when he squeezed harder.
Ruiz laughed and looked straight at Race. "I like this one. Benton clearly only hires the best," he added, straightening his lapels in a self-congratulatory way."
XXX
After a short, but very tense, elevator ride, Race, Phil and Ruiz were led through the office by Alex. The other agents went in the opposite direction, which Race did not like. He assumed Jonny was in that direction. The room they were ushered into was small with no windows.
"Wait here." They were told bluntly. "I'll be back."
"I want to see my client now," Ruiz demanded.
Alex left the room and shut the door behind him before Ruiz could get another word out.
"Bannon…" Phil started once they were alone.
"Your plan wasn't working. Mine did," Race cut him off as he scoured the space for bugs. "It's clean," he then added confidently.
"They can keep us waiting for hours and we don't have our phones. You just lost your leverage…you cocky asshole," Phil announced.
"No I didn't," Race shook his head and looked at Ruiz. "If things don't go the way you expect, make sure Benton makes the call." Ruiz nodded in agreement. Then Race looked back at Phil and started to smile. Feeling almost like his old self. "Besides, I think that just became plan C anyway. Tell me about Alex and why he's so invested in this? It's not about proving himself. That's obvious."
Phil grinned. "Any interest in coming out of retirement once Jonny's off to college?"
"I'm open to the possibility," Race shrugged. "Now tell me about Alex."
"He's been Bartlett's right hand for years," Phil offered. "They're close. I've never heard his name in the mix to take over after Bartlett, but in a situation like this…"
"He's the one Bartlett would want in charge so he could still pull the strings," Race finished. Absorbing that knowledge. "Mr. Ruiz, you've been here before. Any insights?"
"I know Agent Morris," Ruiz said. "He's cybercrimes division."
"Okay," Race nodded. 'At least I know what I'm working with.'
XXX
They were all sitting in their chairs calmly when Alex finally came back to the room.
Ruiz was the first to stand and speak. "It's unacceptable that you haven't let me speak to my client yet."
"That's why I'm here," Alex announced. "I'll take you to him so you can speak in private. I can assure you he hasn't been questioned yet. Mr. Bannon, you can come to. I'll take your statement personally."
"Looking forward to it," Race smiled.
"I represent Mr. Bannon too," Ruiz said next. "I'll come with him first and then confer with Mr. Quest."
"Not necessary," Race told him. "Go talk to Jonny. Tell him I'm here."
"That's highly unadvisable," Ruiz counseled.
"I'm good," Race assured.
XXX
Alex made him wait two hours before finally joining him in the interrogation room. The entire time, Race stared at the watch on his wrist and the wall in turns. He was frustrated, but did not let it show. He was worried about the kids, but did not let it show.
"Would you like some coffee?" Alex offered, taking the seat across from him. "You look exhausted."
"I'm fine, but thanks for the concern," Race responded. "All I need is a pen and paper."
"I thought we could just have a conversation first," Alex suggested. "We can deal with the paperwork later."
"No need," Race grinned. "I don't need my memory jogged. I remember everything. And I'll write down everything you need to know. Promise."
Alex sat back in his chair with a sigh and Race almost felt bad for him. He could tell the man thought he was doing the right thing. Alex looked through the two-way mirror and nodded. Shortly after that, an agent that Race had not seen yet walked in and handed a pen and paper to Alex.
XXX
Race reread his statement three times before signing it to make sure he did not miss anything. Then he slid it across the table to Alex who read it on the spot.
"Very comprehensive," Alex nodded.
"Of course," Race responded and then waited a beat before changing the subject. "I understand professional loyalty, Alex. I have a few brothers that would walk through fire for me and I'd do the same for them. I hope Bartlett is worth it."
Alex narrowed his eyes. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Did he tell you why he resigned?" Race probed. "Do you know why this case is so important to him? Why did he push for YOU to be his interim replacement? Do you know the real answer to any of those questions?"
Alex stood. "You and Mr. Corbin are free to leave. Let's go. I'll walk you out."
XXX
Race's mind was in overdrive as they walked back to the room where Phil was waiting. Trying to figure out his next play. One look at Alex told him that the seeds of doubt had been planted, but Race was not sure how to use that to his advantage.
Phil stood as soon as the door opened and looked over Alex's shoulder at Race. Trying to figure out what the plan was. Race gave an imperceptible shake of his head to confirm he had nothing.
"It's time for the two of you to go," Alex told them forcefully.
"We can't wait for Jonny here?" Race asked.
"You can wait outside or not at all," Alex reiterated, clearly losing his patience.
"Let's go, Bannon."
Race nodded and then he and Phil followed Alex back the way they had come in. Race had resigned himself to plan C when he saw it. He stopped in his tracks. "What the fuck?"
Bartlett was striding quickly across the office. A stack of papers tucked neatly under his arm. He was on a mission and did not even look in their direction. Before Race could fully absorb what he saw, Bartlett handed the stack to Agent Morris and they both entered the room where Jonny was being interrogated.
"This is completely inappropriate," Race accused. "I knew he was the one pulling your strings, but didn't think you were dumb enough to be this transparent."
"You don't have all the facts…"
"He's your mentor," Race interrupted. "He gave you some sob story about being pulled off a case he's been working for twenty years and really needs to see through. But couldn't because someone in the one percent called in a favor, right?" Alex was quiet. "He's using you. Don't go down with him. Even if he's not using you, this is against protocol," Race tried to reason. "He's not active. Even if he were to get what he's looking for, Ruiz would…" Race trailed off. Baffled.
"He's a good man and a great agent. He needs to see this through. To make sure it's handled correctly. To make sure we know the truth," Alex tried to explain. "Have you ever chased a ghost for twenty years?"
'He knows the whole story,' Race thought. 'At least that explains why this all feels like amateur hour. No one is impartial.' Race tried to put himself in Alex's shoes. Would he do the same if it was Phil? He knew that he would, which is why he felt some sympathy. But he did not let those feelings linger. "Shut it down now," he ordered. "While you can still do it quietly. Or leave it up to me and I won't be subtle at all. That kid is innocent and this is a witch hunt because Bartlett's ego is bruised. I won't allow it to continue. This has nothing to do with who his father is. It's about right and wrong. And this is wrong." Race knew he had done plenty of things wrong. Jonny too, but he would have said anything to get Alex to agree so they could get back to Jessie.
"Is this really a hard choice?" Phil pushed and Alex glared at him.
"We had more than enough reason to bring Jonny in for questioning," Alex challenged. "And if he's innocent like you say, then it'll be over soon and you have nothing to worry about. The Director is an experienced interrogator and will get the answers he needs quickly. Then we can all be home by sunrise."
Race debated and did some mental math. If Benton called in a favor, it could still be hours before anything was communicated. Hours that an exhausted and emotional Jonny would be stuck with that experienced interrogator gunning for him. The faster solution was convincing Alex to shut it down.
"Are you really that confident that Bartlett can keep it professional?" Race challenged. "After everything?"
Alex narrowed his gaze, considering that comment before answering. Not giving much away in his expression, but enough that Race knew he was questioning how much everyone knew about Bartlett's daughter. "I am," Alex said confidently.
Race admired the way he stood up for his friend and hoped he would not pay the price. "Then let us observe the rest of the questioning. All of us. If you're right, then we'll all be on our way home soon and your boss' indiscretion can be our secret. If not, you shut it the fuck down or I will."
XXX
Race flushed with anger almost immediately. Alex led them into the observation room after their hallway conversation. He did not have much of a choice. It was his best option. The room was empty and Race's eyes went right to Jonny who was chained to the table. He was sweating and looked more than exhausted. He was surrounded by three agents and his lawyer.
Race strode over to the button on the wall that would allow him to hear what was being said in the next room and slapped it. The first thing he heard was Jonny laughing, which really threw him off.
Then Bartlett laughed too. "That tactic won't work, Agent Morris. This kid knows that Bannon would take a bullet for him. Literal and figurative. Isn't that right, Mr. Quest?"
Bartlett sat back and crossed his arms, settling in. "I hear you've been quiet as a church mouse, Jonny."
'Good boy,' Race thought.
"No doubt following Bannon's orders. So how about I get things going?" Bartlett suggested. "We've learned more about Clay Ravenstone in the last six hours than the last twenty years…thanks to you, young man."
"Clay Ravenstone," Race said the name out loud. He had not stopped long enough to think about him. He held his breath and listened as Bartlett casually divulged details about the man that had hurt her. He vaguely registered Phil saddling up next to him, but his eyes never left Jonny. Studying his reactions. Race saw his breathing pick up. Especially when Bartlett baited him with cruel questions. Understandable. Race was barely controlling his own.
"…We've already positively confirmed the last seventeen girls he's taken, including yours. Do you want to know how?" Bartlett asked.
True to form, Jonny did not answer. But Race's blood ran cold and his hands formed into tight fists when Bartlett nodded at Agent Morris. Race saw it coming before Jonny.
'Pictures.'
Morris placed one in front of Jonny. Race could tell that the picture was a close-up of wide eyes, but he could not tell if it was Jessie from where he stood. Jonny shifted uncomfortable and stayed quiet. Race hoped that Ruiz would intervene before Jonny lost it. However, he did not plan to rely on it. The pile of photos that Agent Morris held was large.
"This fucker took A LOT of pictures to document his activities and he backed them all up on his iCloud. It's some sick shit," Bartlett made a face.
Then Morris laid down another photo. To the left of the first one. Jonny looked without hesitating and then took a deep breath. It was obvious to Race he was affected, which meant it was obvious to Bartlett too.
'Fuck.'
He wheeled around and stared daggers at Alex. "Stop this," he growled. "What the fuck does this have to do with a breach in your security?"
"Not yet. You don't have all the information." Alex pointed out.
'Yes I do,' Race ran a hand over his face and turned back to Jonny. There were three pictures in front of him now. 'That's why I'm worried.'
"Enough," Ruiz boomed and Jonny released a long breath. Then Ruiz stood. "Ask a relevant question or we're leaving."
"You don't have the authority to make that decision," Bartlett grinned. "He's not leaving until he answers all my questions and I have many."
"Ask a question then," Ruiz demanded. "And I'll gladly refer you to my client's written statement, which is an honest and concise account of what happened. And all you need to know to complete your reports."
"I reviewed his statement carefully and yet I still have many questions and no clue who compromised national security on my watch. For me, that's unacceptable. And that also means I'll keep him here as long as I want," Bartlett finished.
"I appreciate that's what you want," Ruiz shot back. "But the law is not on your side. You don't have enough to charge him. Stop this farce."
"I have enough to hold him and question him for quite a while," Bartlett shot back and then turned his attention back to Jonny. "Legally. But feel free to file a motion counselor. Even if you win quickly, he's not getting processed out before Monday. That gives us the holiday and the weekend, Mr. Quest. I think that's all we'll need, right?" he laughed without humor and then gave Morris a strong nod. Jonny swallowed.
Morris started placing pictures on the table quickly. Until it was completely covered. Race recognized the moment when Jonny's eyes found Jessie. The kid squeezed his eyes shut and took two deep breaths. Trying not to look. But he failed. He looked for a few seconds and then stubbornly turned his head away. Eyes filled with tears. If Race did not know better, he would say that Jonny was looking right at him through the glass.
'You can do this," Race thought. 'Hold your ground until I figure out my next move.'
Jonny managed to keep his emotions in check and turn back to Bartlett. Then he calmly reached for two of the pictures and flipped them over so no one in the room could see. When Bartlett immediately reached for them, Jonny slammed his hand back down over them.
"It's nothing we haven't all seen before," Bartlett shrugged. "And there's a lot more where that came from."
"This is pointless and desperate," Ruiz said, sounding bored. "What does it have to do with your system being compromised?"
Bartlett made a face and continued taunting Jonny. "Kid, we still have A LOT of time together. And I can assure you that I've broken better men with much less time." Bartlett forced Jonny's hand away from the photos of Jessie and then lifted them up. "I understand why you did what you did," Bartlett acknowledged. "I would've executed him too."
'Fuck,' Race swallowed.
"Even though I understand why you did it, that doesn't excuse how you went about it," Bartlett growled. "What you put at risk for the benefit of just ONE person. I guess Bannon never taught you that fundamental? Never lead with emotion. Never put the few before the many." He shook his head in obvious disgust and dropped the photos of Jessie. "But you wouldn't know anything about that, huh? Honor and oaths."
Then Bartlett sat back, waiting to see what Jonny would do. If he would take the bait. Race watched as the two of them stared each other down.
'Take a deep breath, kid.'
After a long minute, Bartlett placed his phone on the table and pushed his index finger into the phone. "Clay ventured outside of photos on occasion. There are videos too. Want to see? What?" Bartlett continued to bait. "I know you want to see. You want the truth. Tell me what I want to know and then you'll know everything."
Jonny's entire demeanor changed in a moment. Breath hitched and his mouth popped open. Then his breathing got heavy. Bartlett smiled slightly and his eyebrows jumped. "I can't hear you, son? Don't you want to see it? What he did to her?"
Race turned away from the mirror and glared at Alex. Before he could get a word out though, the commotion from the other room had him turning back and cursing in anger. Bartlett was on top of Jonny. The two chairs in the room had been knocked over and so was the table, which Jonny was still cuffed to. Race pivoted toward the door, but was tackled to the ground before he got anywhere.
Phil had come out of nowhere and surprised him. "Don't make it worse, Bannon."
Race threw Phil off easily and got to his feet. He sprinted to the other room and arrived just in time to see two of the three agents pulling a red-faced Bartlett off of Jonny and caging him with their bodies in the corner. Bartlett was intermittingly demanding to be let go and directing a stream of profanity at Jonny. When he locked eyes with Race, Bartlett's screaming got louder.
Race ignored Bartlett. He also ignored the photos scattered across the room as he stepped through the doorway uninvited. He gave Alex a hard stare and then looked at Jonny. Ruiz simultaneously righted the table and helped Jonny to his feet. The chains around Jonny's hands were just long enough to allow him to stand next to the table. Jonny looked at Race and swallowed. Then he looked down at his feet. Race could not place the expression, but thought it was a mixture of regret and defiance.
"Uncuff him," Race demanded. "Now. We're leaving."
"This IS over," Phil cut in calmly, placing a hand on Race's shoulder. Hoping this would be the time that the gesture actually worked.
There were eight men stuffed into a room meant for less. Phil, Race, Ruiz and Jonny on one side. Bartlett, Alex, Morris and an agent Race had not seen before on the other.
"You have ten seconds," Ruiz threatened. "Before I bring the largest lawsuit you have ever seen against this office. This…display…is just the latest I've witnessed here. I will make your lives SO much harder than they need to be."
"Alex…be reasonable," Phil urged.
"I have him dead to rights," Bartlett argued. Trying to push his way through the agents. "My daughter's involvement in this case is not public knowledge."
"I was sitting right next to him," Ruiz huffed in annoyance. "He did not mention your daughter. No one did."
"It was CLEARLY implied," Bartlett argued. Still stubbornly fighting the two younger agents.
"That will go far with exactly zero judges in this state," Ruiz replied in a bored tone.
"How did you find out about my daughter?" Bartlett zeroed in on Jonny again. "Tell me you piece of shit. Break into my network? I can see that you know about her. It's written all over your face. Did you see what he did to her too? Tell me. Don't be a pussy now. Not after everything," he taunted. "I deserve to know. Do you know about her?"
"He does know," Race admitted and every set of eyes in the room turned toward him. Including a surprised and worried Jonny. Race rushed before Jonny could do something else impulsive. "Because I told him."
Alex crossed his arms and shot Bartlett a concerned look.
"I can't wait to hear the bullshit you're about to spin," Bartlett laughed angrily. "How did YOU find out? Acquire some skills none of us are aware of while living with all those hackers?"
"My methods are not as complex," Race replied dryly. "Your secret is not as well kept among your own ranks as you seem to think. I asked a few of my contacts why you were taking a personal interest…it was easy to figure out from there."
"You expect me to believe that you have contacts inside the FBI?" Bartlett challenged.
"You expect me to believe that you DON'T have contacts inside I-One," Race shot back. "Give me a fucking break. We all know those unofficial channels are how things really get done. I'm sorry about Amy," Race said and he meant it. He came too close to losing Jessie not to mean it.
"Shut up," Bartlett screamed. "Keep her name out of your mouth."
"I am," Race pushed. "But not enough to let this continue. Now let him go or I'll carry out my threat to destroy every career in this room."
Alex waited a beat and then held a hand out to Morris. Morris rolled his eyes, but reached into his pocket and handed the key over without reducing his grip on Bartlett.
"Don't you dare, Alex. Alex?" Bartlett threatened. "Stop. You won't get away with this, Bannon. I won't let you. I'll be this kid's new shadow. I promise you."
"Maybe I'll go ahead and ruin your career anyway," Race growled as Alex unlocked Jonny.
"Great," Bartlett snarled. "That'll give me more free time to dedicate to your family."
"Then see what I do," Race responded coolly.
"Leave them all alone," Jonny mumbled to Race as he walked out of the room without waiting for the others. But it was loud enough that they all heard it.
XXX
When Race finally stepped foot outside again, the sun was shining. He thanked Ruiz and then looked around for Jonny. Expecting him to be waiting. Race furrowed his brow and looked at Phil. No one was around.
"Maybe he went to the car?" Phil shrugged. "He couldn't have gotten far, right?"
Race ran his tongue across his teeth. Thinking. "Maybe," he grumbled, heading in that direction. "But what I thought he could and could not do has drastically changed in the last forty-eight hours."
"Point taken."
"Sorry for being an asshole," Race added.
Phil laughed. "Once again…no you're not. But it's fine."
"How worried should I be about Bartlett?" Race asked.
"Hard to say until things settle," Phil told him honestly. "Hopefully, it was an empty threat. I'll keep an eye on him. I know you will too."
"Yep," Race yawned, yearning for a soft bed. "One more to add to the list."
As they approached the car, it became clear that Jonny was not there.
"Think he's already headed back to the hospital?" Phil wondered.
"Must be," Race shrugged. "I'm sure he bolted the moment they gave him back his wallet. Let's go. Want to roll with? Or I can drop you back at the hotel?"
"I'll tag along if you don't mind," Phil nodded.
"Sounds good," Race patted him on the back. "I'm sure Jess would like to see you. It's been too long."
"It has," Phil agreed. He had not seen her since her graduation party. "Should we call Benton?"
"Nah," Race sighed. "Let's just get there. Jonny will beat us anyway."
XXX
Race opted to climb the hospital stairs instead of taking the elevator. He found it oddly calming. He also found it calming that Phil was trailing behind him. He had always hated hospitals. As much as every other member of the family. But a happy wave of emotion still rushed through him when he stepped foot onto her floor. The floor was abuzz with activity and there was holiday music playing in the background. He allowed himself to relax more and more the closer he got to her room.
He stopped in his tracks when he saw a flash of red through the window to her room. His heart rate doubled. For a split second he assumed it was Estella, but then his eyes focused. It was Jessie. The smile on his face grew. He swallowed and felt tears spring to the corners of his eyes. Not only was she awake. She was up and walking around. He crossed his arms and tried to control his breathing as he stared at his family. Finally all safe in one place again. He wanted to enjoy the view for a moment. When his eyes found Estella, his heart rate tripled and he remembered the last time he saw her. The way she had kissed him. Or maybe it was the way he had kissed her. That part was jumbled.
"You have something in your eye," Phil quipped.
Race cleared his throat and punched Phil lightly. "My gratitude only goes so far, Corbin."
"Right," Phil laughed. "We going in?"
"Yeah," Race smiled more than he said. Then he pulled the back of Phil's shirt suddenly and press his own against the hospital wall. Making sure they were both out of view from the window. "Goddamn it," Race squeezed his eyes shut.
"What?"
Race pushed off the wall and headed back to the stairwell quickly. Phil followed in confusion until Race finally spoke up. "Jonny's not here."
"Are you sure?" Phil asked. Normally, he would not question his friend. But it had been a long few days.
Race did not respond until they were back outside. "Pretty fucking sure, but I know how to confirm." He dialed a number from memory and leaned back against the brick of the building as the phone rang. Phil listened to Race's side of the conversation.
"Benton," he greeted. "How are you?"
"I'm fine," Benton rushed. "Happy to hear your voice. Jonny?" he asked nervously.
Race made an annoyed face and then started walking back to the car. "Good…he's fine. They just released us," Race semi-lied.
"Really?" Benton asked and Race could hear the relief in his voice. "Is it over?"
"Yes, I promise."
"Let me speak with him," Benton demanded.
"He's still being processed out," Race fully lied. "Will take a few more minutes, but I wanted to call and let you know while I waited. We'll be on our way back soon."
"Jessie's awake," Benton then told him and Race could hear the smile in his voice this time. Made him feel even worse for lying.
"She is?" Race grinned and it was genuine even though he already knew. He could hear her asking for the phone in the background.
"She's been a bit impatient to hear from you," Benton added amused.
"I'm shocked," Race laughed and heard the phone being passed around.
"Dad?" she said hesitantly.
Race stopped in his tracks again and leaned against the closest car. "Ponchita. I'm here."
"When will you be back?" she asked quietly. "Can you please hurry?" Race wanted to turn around and go back. He found himself suddenly very angry with Jonny, but her next barrage of questions stopped that train of thought. She barely took a breath in between. "Where's Jonny, dad? Is he alright? I know he's barely slept and I'm worried he's not thinking clearly. What did he say? Is it really over or will he have to talk to them again? Can I just talk to him? Please?"
'I can't go back without him,' Race knew.
"Dad?" she insisted.
"Sweetheart," he said calmly. "He's still being processed, but it's over. I promise. Trust me."
"I do," she sighed.
"We'll be there soon. I promise you that too," he added.
"Thank you," she whispered. "I love you."
"I love you more," he hung up and then fisted the phone in anger.
"Any idea where he'd go?" Phil asked solemnly.
"A few," Race admitted tiredly.
"Let's divide and conquer," Phil said. All business.
XXX
"This too shall pass," Race said in a mocking tone. He was driving and Jonny was leaning back in the passenger seat with his eyes closed. They were on their way home from a Thursday evening kickboxing class. They had been taking it for a few months. "Earth to Jonny."
"I'm aware it's not the end of the world, Race." Jonny sighed heavily. "Does that mean I need to be happy about it?"
She was leaving Saturday morning. Leaving him and their life. It was no surprise. They had talked through it for hours. Planned for it. How they would make it work. How they would succeed where most failed. It was all very logical. Very practical.
But none of it had prepared him for how he would actually feel. The sinking sensation in his stomach had been expanding for weeks and he was actively ignoring it. At least he was trying to ignore it. This was not how he wanted to feel and it was definitely not how he wanted to make her feel. He did not want to put his worries on her. He did not want to admit that he felt so insecure. He wanted to act as confident as he told her he was about everything. But holding it all in had been exhausting. He knew Race saw right through him. He hoped that Jessie did not.
"Sulking doesn't suit you," Race pointed out.
Jonny scoffed. "I'm not sulking. I'm just being quiet."
"You're never quiet. You literally never stop running your mouth. This is freaking me out," Race teased.
"Shut up," Jonny laughed, but it died on his lips fast.
"Are you really worried about a little distance?" Race asked.
"No," Jonny responded distractedly.
"Then what?" Race probed. "Afraid you can't handle the competition?" he laughed.
Jonny did not respond, but he did turn his head away. Not wanting Race to read the look on his face.
"That was a joke, kiddo." Race punched his shoulder lightly. "Don't plant those seeds in your head. No good will come from it."
Jonny chuckled lamely. "Seventy-five percent of the time I can't rationalize why she even chose me in the first place. Who could?"
"Jonny…"
"That was rhetorical," Jonny interrupted quickly. "And my attempt at a joke. I guess we're both not funny tonight." The car was quiet the rest of the drive home. Jonny did not talk again until Race's car drove through the gates of the Compound. "I know that I need to get used to my new normal," he said, staring at the light coming from the top floor of the lighthouse. Assuming that his father and brother were still hard at work. They had been in there all day trying to finish their experiment before the summer ended. "And I will. I promise."
"You're not alone," Race promised back. "It's an adjustment for us all. First Hadj. Now Jess," he sighed. "It'll be just the three of us again."
Jonny smiled briefly at that. "Like old times." Race did not say it out loud, but Jonny knew all the change was hard on him too. And his father. At least they all had each other. Jonny promised himself right then that he would try not to take that for granted. Because it would be his turn to leave soon enough.
Race pulled up to the front door instead of the garage and put the car in park. "Get out. You're depressing me." Jonny furrowed his brow and Race smiled. "I have a few errands to run in town and a gift I need to pick up for Jess. I'll be back in a few hours."
"I could've taken a cab," Jonny said.
"I didn't want to subject a poor cab driver to your shitty mood."
"Haha," Jonny rolled his eyes and jumped out of the car.
Jonny took a deep breath and then stared up at the starry sky as Race drove away. It was a nice night out. He opened the door intent on finding Jessie and taking a walk on the beach, but his plans changed as fast as he had made them. She was on him before the door closed. Pushing him back against it. All he saw was a flash of red. He smelled her perfume before he felt her lips. Her kiss was rushed and messy, but he closed his eyes and did not want it to end.
Once the shocked tension left his body, he wrapped his hands around her face and pushed off the door. He flipped her around until she was forced into the corner where the front door met the wall. He pressed as much of his body to hers as he could before he released her lips. Then he focused in on her neck. Holding her head back with his hands. Sucking and nipping hard. Wanting to leave his mark.
"Jonny," she called out softly, but she was breathing heavily and pulling at his hair so hard it hurt.
He kept his focus on her neck, but did let one hand roam. Down the column of her neck, ghosting over a breast and then her hip, gripping her ass and lifting her off the ground. Forcing one leg around his waist. She wrapped her other leg around him on her own. She was in flannel and fuzzy slippers. Always complaining that they kept the Compound too cold during the summer. "I want you," he moaned into her skin. "I need you."
"Your bed," she told him. "Please…"
Jonny lifted his head from her neck slowly and leaned his forehead against hers. Waiting for her to look at him. When she did, she stopped pulling at his hair. She brought one hand forward to frame his face, while the other affectionately tried to tame his unruly locks.
"I'm so in love with you it hurts," she whispered and her eyes filled with tears.
He pulled her away from the corner and headed toward the stairs. "IRIS…"
"I took care of it," she cut him off with a quick kiss and then hugged herself to him tightly as he climbed the stairs. He could feel her heart against his chest and her lips as they trailed from his neck to his ear. He missed her before she was gone. "Do you remember the first time?" she asked quietly. Once he had reached the second floor.
"Every moment," he promised and then smiled widely. "Let's make some more memories, beautiful."
He eased her to the ground as soon as they entered his room. He locked his door and kicked off his shoes at the same time. "Do you want me to shower first?" he asked. Mindful that he had just come from a workout.
She bit her lip and shook her head no, backing into the room slowly. He followed just as slow. Watching her. Wanting to know what she would do next and savoring every second. He kept his eyes on her as he removed his socks and laughed when she kicked off her fuzzy slippers dramatically. He rushed forward when her hand lifted to the top button of her pajamas. Always wanting to do that part himself.
He reached her just in time. Pushing her hand down to her side and then wrapping both his hands around her hips. He guided her until she was pressed into the wall. She let him, looking like she wanted to jump him again. At least by his estimation.
"What are you doing? I'm in charge here, Mr. Quest."
"No," he grinned, undoing the top bottom of her shirt. "You're not. I am," he told her confidently and kept unbuttoning until he was splitting the fabric open with the same enthusiasm as the first time. Then he got to his knees, taking her pants off in the process. He stared up at her from the ground. She had her hands pressed into the wall and stared right back. Challenging him. Deciding if she would give up control. His first thought was that she looked incredible. The shirt had fallen off her shoulders and pooled around her waist. Her breasts were lit by the sliver of moonlight that his curtains allowed. He was grateful for it because this was a sight he did not want to miss. She was wearing lace white underwear that completely contradicted the flannel pajamas she had been wearing. His second thought was whether or not he wanted to give up control.
He did not.
He kept eye contact as he gently pushed her thighs apart and leaned forward to kiss her. He felt her body tense, but her face remained neutral. His lips spread against her in a smile.
'Stubborn,' he thought and then his tongue shot out to lick her through her underwear. Her eyes half-closed and then shot back open. 'So stubborn,' he thought, sucking on her clit hard. She bit her lip and her hands curled into fists. "Let me win," he murmured against her. "You know you want to, baby."
"Uh," she could not control her reaction. Hands threading into his hair. Holding him to her. He smiled again when she closed her eyes. Then he closed his too and focused on making her feel good. "Jonny," she called out in appreciation. He could taste her desire through the lace and it spurred him on. He relaxed his grip on her hips and guided her left leg over his shoulder so he could have better access. "More," she begged, trying to get closer to his mouth. "Make me…oh!"
He surprised her by standing without warning. She tightened one hand in his hair and braced the other on his back to keep from tipping over. Not that he would have let her fall. He spun around and took four large steps, depositing her in the center of his bed. His eyes instinctively went to her breasts. Watching them bounce involuntarily and not making a move until they settled. Then he kneeled between her legs and removed her underwear. While she finished taking off her shirt and tossing it on his floor. He stared at his beautiful naked girl.
"Why do my clothes always come off before yours?" she raised an eyebrow and asked. Not for the first time. But he always had a good answer.
"Because I'm single-minded when on a mission," he shot back, removing his shirt and watching her react.
"Hmm," she hummed, licking her lips and staring at him just as eagerly. "What's our mission, Quest?" She wanted to hear him say it.
"Mutual euphoria, babe. But I was raised to be a gentleman…so ladies first."
She pressed her foot against his chest and then trailed it down over his abs slowly and eventually the bulge in his shorts. Teasing him. "What're my orders, sir?"
He took a deep breath, staring at her foot between his thighs and then sliding his eyes up the rest of her body. He swallowed.
"Jonny?"
"I want to tie you up" he told her thickly. She was quiet for a while. Thinking. He breathed heavily while watching her. She had not let up with her foot. "Jess?" He gently pushed her foot away. Knowing if she kept it up things would end before he wanted.
"With what?" she asked quietly. Curiously.
He considered for a moment and then jumped off the bed and headed for his dresser. He rooted around and pulled out two of his ties. The only two he had. He avoided wearing them. Turning back toward her, he held one up in each hand. A question on his face.
'Can I?'
"Those are for special occasions," she mocked, shifting up on his bed and crossing her arms behind her head. Waiting for him.
He came back and kneeled by her head. She let him tie each wrist to his headboard. Then he stood and walked to the end of his bed. Watching her. "This is all I'll see every time I wear one of those ties now. That's pretty fucking special."
She laughed. "I love you so much."
He finished undressing and then knelt between her legs. Placing a hand on each thigh. Gripping them with a light pressure. Still staring at her in awe.
He stared and saw her nipples peak. Then her skin broke out in goosebumps. Then her lips parted and her chest heaved. Then she fisted the fabric of both ties and pulled firmly. No give. He was really enjoying the show.
"Jonny?"
He thought she sounded unsure. He leaned down and kissed her neck, putting all his weight on her and trailing kisses up to her ear. "Are you okay, baby? Want me to untie you?" he asked with worry.
She twisted her legs around his waist in response. "Make love to me," she told him. There was nothing unsure, sarcastic or joking in her tone. Just love.
It was…different…to not have her arms around him, but he pushed that thought aside. Leaning back to guide himself to her entrance and so he could see her face. Her hips moved eagerly to help him and he pushed inside her easily. She made a soft noise and wrapped her legs around him even tighter. She felt like home. Her eyes searched his and he hoped she could see how much he loved her. Needed her. He gripped his sheets. Holding on to them instead of her. Thrusting slowly and watching her. She moved slowly too. Uncharacteristically patient.
"I remember everything about that night," he panted. "Tell me you love me?"
She closed her eyes tight and when she opened them tears spilled out. He moved his hips a little faster. "I'm in love with you, Jonny Quest. More than the first time. So much more."
He moaned at that and buried his head in her shoulder. Pumping harder. She matched his intensity. And when he thought about how it felt to have her softness all around him, he almost gave in. Forgetting that he wanted to make it last.
"Tell me you trust me?" he groaned.
"With everything," she said without missing a beat. Right against his ear. It sent a shiver up his spine. "My heart. My body, baby. You can do whatever you want to me. I trust you."
He pushed up on his arms suddenly. Until he was hovering over her. Staring down at her. "Don't say that to me unless you mean it."
He meant it as a warning, but it sounded more like a plea coming out of his mouth.
"I mean it," she pulled against the restraints. "Untie me."
He did. Then he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into a sitting position. She wrapped her hands gently around his neck and pressed their foreheads together as she moved over him. Chasing her own pleasure. Her gripped her hips and helped her.
He watched transfixed. The look on her face was familiar, but never got old. "Jon…"
Her muscles started to clench around him and then so did his heart. Unsure of when he would see the look again after tomorrow. Something close to desperation washed over him. "Don't leave…don't leave me," the words rushed out of him without a thought to the consequences. Her mouth popped open in surprise, but then she closed her eyes and buried her head in his neck.
"Jonny," she whispered into his skin and moved her hips faster. He did the same. Wanting to hear her say his name again. Then he slid his hands up her sides. Feather-light touch. He forced his hands between them and circled her nipples with his thumbs. "Baby…you make me feel so good."
He focused on the feel of her lips against his skin for a moment and then started to fall over the edge with her. He could not hold back any longer. "Defer for a year," he breathed heavily. "Stay with me. I'll make you feel like this every day. I promise. I'll make you forget your name."
"Uh," she cried out for anyone to hear. Thank god they were alone. Then he felt all the tension leave her body and she collapsed against him. Hugging him close. Kissing his skin. Recovering quickly and then moving her hips again. This time just for his pleasure. She bit down on the shell of his ear lightly, knowing exactly how to undo him. "I love how you feel inside me. So hard."
Then it was his turn to collapse. And he did. Right on top of her. Pushing her into the firmness of his mattress while she planted her feet and pushed against him just as enthusiastically. He came and then he came down from the highs she made him feel. She rubbed his back and the back of his neck as he did. "I love you the most," she whispered lovingly. She wrapped her legs around him lightning quick when he made a move to get off her. "Don't go. Please."
He smiled, snaking an arm around her waist and forcing them onto their sides so all his weight was not on her. They were still completely tangled together though and breathing heavy. She tucked her head under his chin and sighed.
Once the fog cleared from his brain, Jonny's heart jumped. He should not have said any of that. 'Fuck me,' he thought.
"What're you thinking?" he tested the waters.
"Mourning the fact that I have to give up my daily dose of you," she kissed his skin. "I'm gonna become a real pent up, bitch."
"Your poor roommate," he laughed.
"I love you," she whispered.
"I'm sorry," he whispered back. "I didn't mean any of that. I swear."
"You didn't, huh?" She sounded skeptical, but not mad. She was lazily drawing hearts on his chest with her index finger.
"I plead the fifth," he declared.
"Overruled," she added sarcastically, shifting until she could see his eyes. "Talk," she ordered softly.
He got lost in her gaze for a moment and then turned his head to stare at the ceiling. Swallowing thickly. "You know…how I feel. Of course it's hard to think about being apart and now it's here," he sighed. "But I haven't forgotten our plan and what we've agreed to." He turned his head to look at her again and smiled. "I was just caught up in the moment. You have that effect of me, babe. I forget my own name when you're naked. Good thing I have a talent for making you say it to remind me," he teased lightly, but felt heavy. He had already half-convinced himself to abandon his California plan and follow her to Boston. Their separation had not even started, but he knew he could not do it for five years.
"I wanna spend forever with you," she blurted out suddenly.
The air rushed out of his lungs. "What?"
He thought he heard her wrong at first. Not expecting anything like that to come out of her mouth. Then he saw her face drop and her cheeks redden. She closed her eyes and shook her head like she was angry with herself. Now he knew how it felt to hear that without warning. It knocked the wind out of him, but he recovered quickly. He put his hand on her face and waited for her to open her eyes. She refused. "Look at me, beautiful." No response. "Baby?" Nothing. "I'm still inside you, but you won't even look at me?" he teased. She still refused and he laughed. "I love you…even though you're so fucking stubborn."
That got a reaction. Her eyes shot open and she glared at him. Her lip curled a little. "Jonny…"
"You've…just never said it first before," he interrupted softly. Out of breath. Then he kissed her slow. "You've…I love you so much," he whispered against her lips. "I love you. You've never said it first."
She tried to pull him closer, but they were already as close as possible. It made him smile that she tried though. "I love you too, Hotshot."
"Been a while since you've called me that," he realized. "Feeling nostalgic?"
"Maybe a little," she admitted. "It's a good nickname. I think it's making a comeback."
"No arguments," he kissed her again. "And I want you forever too. Plus a day."
"Must everything be a competition with you?"
"Yes," he chucked and then sobered. She stroked the side of his face lightly. He closed his eyes and enjoyed it.
"You didn't mean it?" she asked again.
"I did at the time," he admitted with a sigh.
"It was a few minutes ago, baby."
"Jess…"
"Come on," she pushed. "We need to be honest with each other right now."
"I want you to go, Jess. I really do. It's been a dream of yours for so long and I want every one of your dreams to come true," he started honestly.
"But?" she pushed again. He hesitated. Hating that he felt vulnerable. He always wanted to be strong for her. "You're still inside me," she used his words against him. "If you can't be honest with me now…"
"When I summon all of my selfish and insecure energy? Ignore all things practical?" he hedged.
She cut him off with a firm kiss. Holding the back of his neck tightly so the kiss did not end until she pulled away. "Summon away, love."
"I feel like you're leaving me behind and I'm afraid you're gonna get there. To this amazing new experience and realize that you want more than I can give you. And please don't say something to placate me," he continued. "Please? That won't make me feel better right now."
"I want to spend forever with you," she repeated simply. "You. Only you. Have faith in us."
Jonny smiled big. "You sound like me, babe."
"It was bound to happen," she giggled. "Besides, this is how we work. I doubt. You reassure. You fall. I catch. I cry. You make me laugh. You doubt. I reassure. Right?"
"Right," he promised. "And at the risk of completely freaking you out…I already feel married to you."
"I don't think marriage is this easy, Quest."
"So you're saying this will get harder?" he furrowed his brow in mock confusion. "Huh?" he rolled away, slipping out of her and onto his back. She made a noise in protest, but let him.
She propped her head up on her elbow and stared down at him. "What?"
"Well…I'm just rethinking this whole thing," he said seriously, but quickly broke out into a laugh when she slapped his chest playfully.
"Really?" she growled dryly.
"Nah…I think I'm up for the challenge," he whispered.
She cuddled up to him again before answering. "I know you are."
He stilled her hand on his chest and laced their fingers. "I'm gonna miss you."
"I promise we'll make up for lost time when I'm home," she kissed his neck and then his shoulder lovingly. "I'll even let you fuck me on your bench press," she whispered in his ear and then pressed her lips firmly behind his ear.
His breath hitched at the thought and he smiled, remembering when he told her about that fantasy. A little shocked because he was not expecting something dirty to come out of her mouth. "Please never stop surprising me, beautiful. And I will DEFINETELY hold you to that promise," he proclaimed.
"Good," she sighed, closing her eyes. He tried to memorize the way her eyelashes felt against his skin. How every part of her that was currently touching him felt. Before he knew it, twenty minutes had gone by. He sighed and stared at the clock on his bedside table with anger. Race would be home soon. He rubbed her back a little more firmly. "Wake up, babe."
"I'm awake," she unlaced her fingers from his and started to caress his neck instead.
"You haven't moved an inch in a while," he commented.
"Memorizing," she mumbled and that made him chuckle a little. "What do you want to do after we graduate?" she then asked.
"Marry you," he kissed her forehead.
Jessie giggled happily. "I was hoping for something more specific than that. We've talked so much about college, but not much about what comes after," she pointed out. "Besides working for your dad." Jonny stayed quiet. "Why did your heart just start racing, babe?"
"I don't know if I want to work there," he admitted.
"Since when?"
"I don't think I ever said that I wanted to in the first place," he told her softly. "Everyone just assumed and I've never corrected."
"Why not?" Her tone was starting to sound accusatory.
He shrugged. "Because maybe I'll decide that is what I want. I just don't know for sure right now and didn't want to start a whole thing with my dad. I know he'll be disappointed if I decide to do something else. But he has Hadj."
She went quiet.
"What's wrong?" he pushed.
"Digesting that," she told him. "And your dad doesn't consider you and Hadj a one-for-one trade. Don't act like he would," she scolded.
Jonny nodded even though she could not see it. He knew she was right. She always called him on his shit.
"Why haven't you mentioned this before?" she eventually asked.
"Wasn't a conscious choice, Jess. It's not something I've thought about much," he said. "Why would I?"
"What do you mean? I thought it was part of our plan?" she asked.
"We've never talked about specifics that far out," he huffed. "Isn't that how THIS conversation started?"
"I guess."
"Babe?" he asked in confusion. "Does this seriously upset you?"
"No…just threw me off," she shook her head.
He lifted his hand to stroke her hair. "Why?" he wanted to know.
"Rockport is home," she told him. "I always thought we'd all end up back here after school."
"And we can't unless I work for my dad?" he challenged.
She propped herself up on his chest to look him in the eye. "Of course not, but you have to admit that there's not much opportunity for you outside of Quest Enterprises in Rockport. That means you could end up somewhere else and…yes, I do need time to wrap my brain around possibly ending up somewhere else. I've never considered that before."
"It's not a choice between Quest Enterprises and another company," he explained calmly. "It's a choice between working for my father and working for myself. Building something of my own."
He watched as her expression changed and her entire body softened. "I could see that," she grinned. "I think you'd build something amazing. And I'd love to see that actually."
"And I can do that from anywhere I choose, but it's nice to know you'd consider following me," he smiled. Surprised. "You're making me blush."
She stared at him for a long moment. "You're my home."
"Now you're really making me blush," Jonny looked away. Embarrassed, but he could not hide his grin.
She laid down next to him again. Her head on the pillow close to his. She lifted her hand and played with his hair until he turned back to her.
"I don't understand why you think you're not enough." She teared up again.
"Only when I summon all my insecure energy, remember?"
"You're more," she promised. "More than I knew I wanted and definitely more than I deserve."
He shook his head no. "Jess…"
She interrupted him. "I'm always right, remember?"
That got him to laugh and then kiss her. "Whatever you say, baby."
"You're not replaceable, Jonny. Not to me…so never give up on us, okay?"
"Easiest promise I've ever made," he kissed her again.
"Good…so what else do you want to do after we graduate?" she redirected.
He thought about it for a moment. "Well…I'll miss IRIS, but I definitely want us to get our own place," he told her.
"By the water," she mused.
"Yes," he played along. "I want to wake up next to you and run on the beach before breakfast. And I want to fall asleep with you in my arms. Windows open so we can hear the ocean. That's all I want, beautiful."
"That's all?"
"And a good night blowjob," he added smoothly. "Or good morning. That works too."
"You're such a dick," she laughed.
"No…I just sometimes think with my dick," he defended.
"You're ridiculous," she accused with a grin.
"Well…you're the one who wants to spend forever with me," he joked.
"Plus TWO days," her eyes shone.
Jonny could feel her in his arms as he listened to the ocean. Then he opened his eyes and stared out at the waves. His hands were buried in the sand. Gripping it like it could ground him. He loved that memory. It was one of his favorites, but he rarely thought about that night because he could never separate it from what followed. She had made him feel untouchable that night. Loved in a way he had never felt before. Confident in their relationship. Committed to a life with her. Less than twenty-four hours later, she told him she wanted three months alone.
She shook his faith with just a few words. He had told her he understood. He did not. He had told her he was over it. He was not. It still hurt.
He ran a hand over his face and had an argument with himself.
'Why are you thinking about this now?'
'Because it's easier to think about how much that hurt than everything else.'
'Why are you thinking about it at all? She's moving away with you. Just like she promised. Actions are louder.'
"You're my home." He heard her voice instead, closing his eyes and letting her voice wash over him. Calm him. And then he saw those photos again and thought about the videos that Bartlett had mentioned.
A pained sound escaped his lips and he dropped his head to his knees.
"What're you doing, kid"
Jonny sighed. He had not heard Race approach. He lifted his head, but did not look Race. "I want to be alone."
"Too bad." Race growled. "Why the hell am I standing here? I should be at the hospital."
"Didn't ask you to come," Jonny pointed out plainly.
"Why are YOU not at the hospital?" Race tried. Not understanding at all. "You should be with her. After everything…why would you come here instead?"
"To torture myself," Jonny said hollowly.
Race grabbed Jonny by the arm and pulled. "Let's go."
Jonny wrenched away and then fell to the ground. "Just leave me alone," he begged. "Please?"
Race stared down at Jonny and felt his patience return. The kid looked defeated. He was staring out at the ocean, hugging his knees. Race took the same position in the sand. Except he sat facing Jonny, who refused to look at him.
"I'm sorry," Race started. "I shouldn't have taken my anger out on you."
"I don't care about that," Jonny told him.
"What do you care about?" Race asked.
"Keeping her safe," Jonny admitted.
"I know," Race said. "You did."
Jonny did not acknowledge that comment. "Do you ever think she'd be safer if we left?"
"What?"
"Think about it," Jonny shrugged. "Every time her life has been in danger…" He did not finish his thought. He did not have to.
"You're exhausted," Race sighed. "And you've more than earned that exhaustion. Let's pretend you never said that. You don't mean it."
"How would you know what I mean?" Jonny challenged.
"So you'd leave when she needs you most?" Race asked. "Getting her away from that monster was the easy part." Jonny huffed in disbelief. "It was," Race continued. "The shit that comes after the horrible thing. That's the hard part. So I'll ask you again…are you gonna walk away in the name of love? Leave when it actually matters most to just be there? If that's a serious thought, than you're not the man I thought you were."
Jonny's head dropped between his knees. Race held his breath and waited. Unsure if tough love was really the way to go.
'Was it a serious thought? Or was he just exhausted? Could he really leave if he thought it would make her safer? Would he? She had told him that was her biggest fear. They were standing here when she said it. He thought she was being ridiculous when she said it. He thought that fear may have been the reason she asked him to stay away for three months. Was it a serious thought? No…he had made so many promises to her over the years and would not break any of them. He would show her. Actions spoke louder.'
"I'd never leave her," Jonny whispered. "I don't even know how. I didn't mean it."
"I know," Race acknowledged. "So let's get to the hospital already. She's been asking for you."
Jonny's head shot up and all the air rushed from his lungs. "What did you just say?"
Race smiled. The first real smile Jonny could recall seeing from him in a while. "She's awake, Jonny. And she's been asking for you."
"Oh my god." Jonny stood. "Oh my god." Then he started to run.
Race stood too and laughed. "Kid…the car is this way."
Jonny pivoted and ran in the direction that Race pointed. Then Race followed. "These two are gonna kill me," he grumbled, but he never stopped grinning.
Jonny is so tired and confused, but at least he will get a reunion next chapter. For real this time.