A/N: Written for the "Twisting the Hellmouth" FFA Challenge pairing. Pairing isn't necessarily romantic. It's open enough for it to be up to the reader to decide whether or not the two involved in this ficlet are an actual couple or might become one.

Chapter 1: Dangers of Demons (Alexander "Xander" Harris/Merrill)

"Come to lecture me again?" Merrill asked resentfully.

Xander sighed. "I'm concerned."

"You don't need to be. I have everything under control," Merrill insisted.

Xander shook his head. "That's what people always say right before they lose whatever little bit of control they have."

"I'm being careful!" Merrill insisted further.

"I never said you weren't. But you need to realize that when you deal with demons, you never have as much control as you think you do," Xander told her. "I like you. I really do and I don't want to see anything happen to you."

"Well you have a funny way of showing it sometimes." Merrill replied coolly, at least for her.

Xander couldn't help but wince at her tone. "Merrill…"

"Why do you have to be so judgmental all the time?" Merrill complained.

"Do you know what I used to do on my old world?" Xander asked. Merrill shook her head. The strange human rarely, if ever, talked of his past. When he did, it was usually in the form of some sort of debate with either Anders or Fenris, the two people who were polar opposites on where they stood on the issue of magic and free mages. Merrill personally didn't fully understand it, but then she thought humans in general were weird and that Fenris spent too much time with them and was, in many ways, just like them. "I used to hunt demons."

"You were a Templar?" Merrill asked with some alarm.

Xander huffed in amusement. "Hardly. I had several friends who were mages and even a few that were demons."

"But you hunted them," Merrill pointed out in confusion.

Xander nodded. "When I first started out, I thought all demons were bad. It took several years for me to learn that just like regular people, some demons can be good."

Merrill perked up. "So you know not all demons are bad! So why do you judge me like you do?"

"Because the types of demons that offer power and knowledge are never of the good and never do anything without it benefitting them in some way," Xander explained, "And as careful as you think you are, the demon is always at least three steps ahead. Their oaths are carefully worded so that they always have an out." He shook his head. "I've had to put down more than one friend due to either possession or their own pride. I don't want to have to do it again, but I will if you force me to."

"It won't come to that!" Merrill rebutted insistently.

"Can you guarantee that?" Xander asked in reply. "Can you look me in the eye and tell me that you have planned for every contingency. That you've accounted for every circumstance? My friend Willow was like you. She didn't make any deals with demons- she knew better- but she was so sure in herself- in her power, knowledge and skill in magic that she became consumed by it. She forgot one very important lesson when dealing with mystic forces, the most important lesson of all. If the Chantry is to be believed, the Magisters of the old Tevinter Imperium forgot that lesson too and that is why darkspawn exist. Magic ALWAYS has a price. It ALWAYS takes a toll and that isn't even accounting for demons. Is restoring your people's legacy worth that price?"

"You are not Dalish! You don't know what it's like!" Merrill responded angrily. "This could make my people great again!"

"That fact that your people still survive and have managed to recover even a little bit of their lost legacy in spite of what the Imperium did to them proves they are great," Xander countered coolly. "I might not be Dalish, but I know what it's like to lose everything. Far better than any of The People. Your people might have lost its culture, but NONE of you living today even remembers what it was like. You hold up your old ways like it was some sort of Golden Age, but if those ways were so great, why isn't Arlathan still standing!? I may be human, but I've lost EVERYTHING, my culture, my world, my FRIENDS AND FAMILY…" He took a deep breath to reign in his anger at the elf girl while turning his back to her. "Merrill… I… I like you. A lot. You remind me a lot of a girl I loved who could never love me back the same way. I don't… I don't want you to get hurt."

"Are you done?" Merrill asked coolly. "I have work to do."

Xander sighed. "Yeah, I'm done." He headed towards the door. He paused when he grasped the handle. "Merrill… Magic always exacts a price and it's never something you expect. You remind me of another girl I loved and she could never get that and in the end, when we lost the girl we both loved, Willow went off the deep in and started messing with some pretty heavy dark magics and I had to kill her, the girl who was my sister in all but blood, to keep her from doing something extremely bad. I don't want that to happen to you."

"Goodbye Alexander," Merrill replied obstinately.

"Bye, Merrill."

Later…

"It's you…" Merrill said dully as she opened her door for Xander. Her eyes were red from crying. "Have you come to gloat?"

Xander looked at her sadly and shook his head. "No. I'm not here to judge you." He shrugged. "I doubt anything I could say could top anything you haven't said to yourself all ready."

Suddenly, Xander found his arms filled with the petite elf girl mage as she began sobbing. Xander held her and steered her inside her hovel, closing the door with his foot. "W-Why? Why did she…?

"Because she loved you. Because she didn't want to see something like that happen to you," Xander told her in a comforting tone.

"B-But… She… And… The clan…" Merrill blubbered.

"I know," Xander replied, rubbing her back soothingly.

"I just… I just wanted to help my people!" Merrill sobbed.

"Back home we had a saying, 'the road to hell is paved with good intentions'," Xander replied. "A lot of evil is done by people trying to do good things. When everything is said and done, we have to pay the price for our actions, both good and bad, and hope our friends can get us through the tough times."

Merrill sniffled. "You were right."

"I didn't want to be," Xander replied.

"I just… I miss her…" Merrill said. "And… I… I… I don't know…"

"It's okay to resent her," Xander told her.

"I don't!" Merrill insisted.

"Don't you? Not even a little bit?" Xander asked. "Her reactions resulted in your exile from the only family you've had for quite some time. If I were you, I'd resent her a little bit."

"But she…"

"Sacrificed everything for you?" Xander interrupted and finished her sentence. "That's the thing isn't it? Feelings are rarely rational, nor do they have to really make sense. It's okay to resent her and it's okay to feel guilty about resenting her because of what she did for you. Just remember that what she did, she did because she loved you, just like everything you did leading up to Marethari's sacrifice you did out of love for your people. It doesn't make anything right, or even okay, but you can't change the past, no matter how much you might wish to."

Merrill laid her head on Xander's chest. "I'm sorry for not listening to you…"

"We all make mistakes. Some worse than others for reasons nowhere near as good as yours," Xander told her. "Maker knows I've done some things with magic I really shouldn't have. Remind me to tell you about a love spell gone wrong sometime."

Merrill actually smiled at that. "Thank you for being here."

"I couldn't not be," Xander assured her. "I know the pain of what you're going through all to well. I couldn't have stood by and said nothing. That just isn't who I am."