Chapter 3

(WARNING: LOTS OF SWEARING.)

Peril laid down on the cold stone floor. "Maybe I should get some rest", she thought. She did ask to stop for that reason. Peril closed her eyes, stomach longing for food. This was the 1st time she registered that she was actually hungry since she left the palace. She usually blocked out the feeling for as long as she could because, to be honest, she almost ate nothing else but she knew from what little other food she did eat that black rocks tasted disgusting. "But I don't have to eat those anymore," Peril thought. "Cause i don't live with Scarlet anymore. Now I can eat stuff like squirrels. Or maybe one of those cows Clay liked mumbling about in his sleep." that was the last thought she had before she fell into a light sleep. She opened her eyes. The first thing she noticed was the blinding ray of light entering her eyes. She could hear mud squelching. Her mind immediately went to Clay. "He's the only one who ever truly cared about me. Why can't I be with him?" Peril mumbled to herself. She looked around her. And there he was. Jumping. Rolling. Laughing. There he was. Clay the MudWing.

"Clay! Where are we?" Peril yells out to him, grinning so much, she appeared possessed. Clay looks over to her, worry starting to spread across his face. "Peril, we have to talk about your past actions. Was killing so many dragons really worth it? Was betraying my friends and I the right move? Did you ever feel any sort of guilt knowing families might be mourning the loss of family members to you?"

Peril's eyes glistened. "Clay", she thought, "why must you point out all the wrongs I ever did?" She was about to tell him that. Well, maybe after she finished telling him about the past few hours. And asked about what he did these past few hours. And after they got dinner. Ok so maybe that would take a while. But who cared! She was with Clay now! Or at least, that's what she hoped. Before she could speak another word Clay seemingly disintegrated into the mud. "Oh no," Peril thought, panickedly, "I didn't do anything wrong did I? Clay is still ok, right? Please let him be ok." She could handle being a murderer. She could handle a mother unhappy to be with her. She could handle years of abuse by Scarlet she didn't even know was abuse. She could not handle losing Clay. She dug around in the mud for a few seconds before hearing a familiar voice.

"You know damn well he was not Clay. It's simply your self-conscience." the new voice slipped into her mind. A raspy voice, old with age. Peril listened intently. Then, she finally put her talon on it. Osprey. She turned around, expecting to see the old SkyWing. She let out a small gasp. Instead of the Osprey Peril knew too well, a SkyWing with vibrant red scales stood tall and proud. He looked more like Vermilion than anything.

"Are you Vermillion?" she asked. "Cause if you are you aren't getting those rings back. I kinda melted them."

"No no Peril, it's Osprey, your teacher." the SkyWing, Osprey replied, now, in a loud and clear voice. "I understand the confusion. You never saw me in my prime, did you? And sorry for the bluntness. I had some deep, fancy speech about it but I forgot the words. Come." he gestured to a rock. "Sit for a moment." Peril obliged. She took in the view. Things were soft around the edges, like the watercolour paintings around the castle. She had to squint to see some things but she noticed she was in a small clearing in the woods, a brook washing by in a loud and busy fashion. Osprey spoke again. "I hope you know that this whole thing isn't all your fault. Stop thinking about it for it will drag you down. If you want my advice you should try and reconcile with Kestrel, even if she is being awful. She still cares for you, you kn-" Osprey continued, but was cut off abruptly by a new, particularly loud and slurred voice.

"WAKE UP YA LAZY SLOB!" Kestrel bellowed at Peril, waking her up. Peril blinked her eyes which refocused themselves. She could smell the scent of cow and.. what was that? "Mom? You're back?" Peril asked, yawning loudly. Snorting, Kestrel rolled her eyes and threw a cow in front of Peril's snout. "What does it look like, ya… ya lazy RainWin-like SkyWing? Has flyin so mush made ya a bloodah idiot?" Kestrel roared at Peril as loud as she could trying not to be heard by others. Her words were slurred and certain syllables were drawn-out. She had a smell Peril recognized well enough: alcohol. She never really saw many drunk dragons, likely because they were too unsturdy to be within a thousand meters from her. From what little she did see she saw 2 kinds of drunks: the happy and dopey kind and the grumpy and loud ones. Kestrel was obviously the latter. She knew that Kestrel didn't fully mean what she said and probably wouldn't even remember much of tonight. But nevertheless, Peril's heart stung. She shook her head, unwilling to show weakness in front of her mother since that would likely aggravate her. "Thank you for the food, mother. What is that you're holding?" she asked, gesturing to the bottle in her hand, despite knowing already what it was.

"Wine! Foun' a mershan fella who was willin to gimme this whole bottle o the stuff for a cow! It isn as good as the stuff in the palace that the bitch Scarlet occasionally gave us soldiers durin da feasts, but it's still wine nonetheless. S' better than whateveh swill the useless bastard Webs dug up outta the cave anyway. Webs, heh listn. Webs is a fuckin basterd an don ye furget it." Kestrel roared in a drunken rant. She went on for a good while repeating basically the same thing over and over. Occasionally she took a swig of her wine, getting tipsier and tipsier. She was also swearing up a storm. Abit of a shift from someone who felt awkward talking about an offensive hand gesture. That was fine though. Its not like the guards in the palace had clean tongues anyway. Or Scarlet for that matter. Peril didn't really know who this Webs was. She thought Clay brought it up once. "Yer not listenin ta me" Kestrel said in a quiet voice. She was right, but Peril didn't want to get in trouble for it Peril tried to counter but was just shot down as she opened her mouth. "NO! No. yer not listenin. Yer not. C'mear." Glaring at Peril, Kestrel tried to get up of a stone bench on one end of their little antechamber only to stumble to the ground. "Help yer mother," she said, muffled by the ground.

"Mom, I can't do that and you know it." Peril said. "You would get set on fire." This didn't do anything. Kestrel just raised her talon. "Help. Ya mother." she said. This time with more authority. Peril just sat there and tried to start eating her cow. It was a bit rude, but she didn't have much else to do besides listening to her mother scream at her. She "Bitch." said Kestrel when she saw she wasn't getting any help. "Yer and ungradeful bitch ye know that? Cant even, no. no listen. Ya can… ya, no stop rippin apart da cow and look at meh. Can't even help ya own mother. Yer. Own. Mother." Peril was feeling too guilty to try to eat now. She was also feeling quite a few things as well, mostly negative. But she decided to keep them suppressed for now so she could make it through the night without breaking down. She threw aside the heavily charred carcass of her cow.

"Heh, don ya do that." Kestrel said. It was kinda hard to understand her with all the slurring in her voice. That had to be some really strong wine for her to be this badly drunk. "I didn't get ya a whole ffffuckin cow jus fer ye to throw it in da groun like that. Ye pick that up an eat or imma gonna get fuckin mad asall ell." Peril obliged. She just picked at it with her claws so it would get less burnt. Her appetite was still spoiled by all the beratement so she just ate it in tiny shreds. The skin was nasty, tasting similar to the black rocks Peril used to eat. But the insides were surprisingly good. Likely because it was already cooked by her. "So this is what those cows Clay mutters about in his sleep taste like." she thought. She listened to Clay's mumblings a lot when he slept. She did this with some of the other prisoners from time to time as well but they mostly just snored or whimpered all night. A guard said it was weird and creepy but what else was she gonna do? Sleep? Yeah right. Because snoring around her dull, boring room was more interesting than listening to the thoughts of one of the most interesting dragons that ever came to the arena. So she told that guard to stick his tail up his nose. She didn't hover over him all night though. Just stood there for a few minutes whenever she passed by. That was less creepy right? Thinking of Clay made the meal a bit better. She envisioned him gouging himself on one with that big doofy look on his face. She wished he was here. He could handle this. He lived with her mother every day of his life. "Like i'm going to have to now." she thought mournfully "please please let her not be like this every night. I can't stay sane like that. Well as sane as i already am considering I-NOPE. Not going down there. Just think about Clay. Think about Clay. Think about…"

"Wha so funneh abou tha wall there?" Kestrel asked, squinting at the wall like it just said it drank rabbit piss for breakfast. She had finished her wine, throwing the bottle in an empty brazier. Peril jumped at her mother's sudden statement. She was so lost in her tangent she failed to notice the time passing by. It was mid sunset when she woke up. was almost dark out now. The last bit of sunset fading out behind the mountains. Kestrel had lit a fire. It was warm and bright with some smoke flowing out of it and bathed the grey and green tomb with a yellowish glow, but Kestrel was still sober enough to take the precaution of putting some tattered orange banners that were hanging on some handmade rock piles just outside and draping them over the windows. It was haphazard, yes but it provided sufficient cover for the time being. It did however cause the problem of the smoke lingering in the small room for a good amount of time, leading to Peril having a coughing fit soon after she snapped into reality. She also noted that the cow she was picking at, despite her slow eating speed, was eaten through quite a bit. And also so charred that it was completely black and somewhat shriveled with the skin crumbling when she poked it. She decided she had enough of it and pushed it aside. It was probably inedible now anyway. Kestrel got up and stumbled her way to the wall Peril was staring at during her thoughts, basically crashing snout-first into it. She expelled a short but exasperated groan into it "There isn't anything there mom" Peril said. "I was just… daydreaming. While i was eating." Kestrel didn't say anything and got back up, ignored her newly acquired nosebleed and sat down by the fire.

They just stared at it for a few minutes. The blaze was rather mesmerizing. Peril looked at fire a lot. Hard not to when most things you touch melt or burst into flames. But most of the time she didn't give them more than a passing glance. But something about this one just had her attention. She didn't really know why. Maybe someone like Osprey would say it was more calm and controlled compared to her more accidental or exciting fires in the arena or some other fancy stuff like that. Except longer and more boring. Peril tried her best to listen to Osprey when she could. She knew he was trying. But he just droned on and on and on until Peril's brain just couldn't bother putting the words in actual sentences. And most of the time the subjects weren't even interesting. Like, who cares about some silly old war that happened a million years ago when we were barely even involved with it? And the legal system? YAWN. Scarlet ignores most of the laws anyway when they don't benefit her. But it wasn't all for naught. She could read basic sentences and she knew a bit of history stuff. Most of it was useless but it was something! It was pretty sad he's gone. Sure, he wasn't family or anything, but losing one of the only people who cares about you doesn't wash over easily. "Family" Peril thought. "My mother turned out to be still alive. Maybe whoever my father was is still alive as well…" Scarlet never mentioned Peril's father. She just told her that he wasn't anyone to worry about, which obviously meant he was someone interesting. People never say that someone shouldn't be "worried about" unless they have some relivense after all. At least from her experience. And she did have the perfect source for an answer now that Kestrel has loosened her tongue a bit...

"Mom, who is my father?" Peril said. The soul piercing glare she got from Kestrel made her regret her question almost immediately. "A ffffukin basterd is who he is." she said surprisingly clearly with venom in her voice, not directed at anyone in particular, but intimidating nonetheless. Peril knew her mother couldn't hurt her, not without getting triple the pain in return anyway. But the disgust in her voice was shocking, even in her drunk, rowdy state. She must hate him pretty badly. Despite her brain telling her to abort the conversation, she pressed on. "Ok ok. But i mean… what was his name?" Kestrel sighed. "Yer an inquersitve lil snipe aint ya? He was some Skywing called Soar. Yah. Real fucking weird name he gots there anit? What fuckin… what fuckin idiot names theirselvse after a pain? He was so full of fukcin bullshit. Y'know every conversation alwais ended up with im tryin to get between my legs. An whenever i told im to go fuck himself he jus goes right on and yelles at meh for it. Always fuckin goin on about meh bein rude and i neaded ta calm fuckin down. Like HE wasnt trien ta get on meh 5 minutes ago. And he was obviously a fuckin defect or somthn because the momet i actually gave that cunt what he wanted look what came outa meh. Two. Defective. Dragonets." Peril didn't particularly enjoy being called a defect. Especially by her own mother. So she opened her mouth to counter. But she barely got started on a word when Kestrel shot her down. "TWO DEFECTIVE DRAGONETS!" she bellowed at the top of her lungs. The noise startling multiple woodland creatures outside. "You gettin too much fire ta even give ya a bed an your brother who was fuckin useless cause he didn't get none of it. Defects. Oh and what did he do the MOMENT there was fuckin trouble? He ups an dissapers ta leave me in charge of da mess. Maybe he found some other lady ta harras. Maybe he got drafted for a war and nobody told meh. Maybe he fuckin died. I don't fucking know an I doun't much fuckin care. Good riddance." Kestrel huffed, smoke coming out of her flared nostrils. Unlike her previous rants this one was more clear with less slurred words (though the touch of alcohol lingered on her voice.) Peril winced, not expecting such a harsh answer, but then again, this was Kestrel. She seemed to be a more "say it as it is'' type. Peril just had to be patient and she would calm down right? "Can you tell me more about him?" she asked again. "I mean, what he looked like?" "He had some golden-orange scales with orange wings, and amber eyes." Kestrel said, still drunk but even more clear this time. Her voice still oozing bitterness but also having a slightly reminiscent tone, as though thinking of better times. "He didn't appear to have any scars, none I could see anyway. Fucker could walk in with a bear scratch on his leg one day and he be completely fime by the next week. He had long horns with big ass tacky goldin markings on them. And a deep voice that made him sound so fuckin stupid. Which he was by the way. He must've gotten a whole bunch of money from somewhere as he had gold rings on his claws, a black necklace and an armband with tiny rubies on it. He never took em off ill have ye know. They may as well ave been part of him."

Peril was slightly shocked that Kestrel didn't really seem to be talking trash about his looks considering the first part of her rant. Sure she still caled him fucker and stupid but she used it in a slightly less serious tone. As though joking about a friend. Did she hate this guy or not? Maybe talking to her about family while she was drunk wasn't the best idea. But she decided to give it one more shot. So, taking a deep breath, she asked one more question, this time about her brother. "What about my brother? What was he like?"

Wrong move. Kestrel narrowed her eyes at Peril. Peril gulped her saliva, thinking that she had been caught asking questions in a very forbidden territory. "pale orange, fireless and very dead," she replied, coldly. She staggered up clumsily, still under the effect of drink, likely expecting the conversation to end then and there. But Peril wasn't having it

"Do you regret killing him?" Peril pressed on for answers. Kestrel might brush off her brothers appearance and personality, but she could not ignore that question. Snarling at Peril, Kestrel hissed. "Don't ya go questinonin mah decisions when ya don care ta know mah situation." Kestrel's slurring had returned out of nowhere. And she was pissed. "I wouldn't be in the situation I'm in now if ya didn't start the problems in da firs place. Scarlet was a biiiiig fuckin bitch an I fuckin hated her den an still do. But i didn have ta fuss cause I couldnt change it. I was quiets and I did whatevr he fuck I was tol ta do. No problems, no prohathingys. No disappointed dragonets. Buh then Soar comes smasin inta mah life cause da queen says so an I pop out some fuckin defects she didn like. Now I am on da run, have a dead son, a daughter that was turned to a fuckin crazy killer an can burn all the trees in a forest, finding shelter made significantly harder fem meh. A trail of failure behind me when i couldn't even raise no dumb fuckin kids even with help and a doombed ta fail prophecy in mah wake cause ya had ta hatch with that fucking luck didn't ya?"

Peril's eyes glistened, sadness then replaced with rage. Eyes burning hotter than her scales, she locked eyes with her mother with a scowl on her face. "Oh yeah yeah. Blame ME for everything. Blame the "defect" of a daughter who couldn't choose anything in her life." she objected in anger. "It's not like YOU did things wrong. Nooooo. It's Soar, or Webs, or the Dragonets or whoever was nearby. You're an asshole you know that? I-" She was stopped when Kestrel took what remained of her cow and hurled it at her, knocking her to the floor. It didn't hurt much but the shock of it was what got her. Her mother, her own mother, was hating her. "Doun. Evah. Talk. Ta meh. Like dat. EVEH. Again." Kestrel said, coldy and simply. "Im fuckin done with this game yer playin. Im fuckin tryin mah best i can. An you start talkin ta meh like this? Yer being an ungratesful bitch ya know that?"

"It would help," Perils said as she pushed the cow carcas of her "If you stoped blaming me for things LIFE did to you." Peril wasnt taking any moral high ground here but she was not going to be pushed around by her mother like this. "Well thas jus how it is init?" Kestrel said. "Life jus fuck ye up an then ya die. An i aint blamin ya fer shit. If i was woldnt let ya travel with meh in da firs place. Shit here is jus fuckey and i cant do shit about it and ye aint helpn. Now stop glarein at meh and go the fuck to sleep." Peril was done with all this today. "OH i'll go to sleep all right. But i aint putting up with you through it. Have fun sleeping on your own." She went to the door that led into the tomb proper. It was metal but it held her heat long enough for her to hold it for a while without it melting. "Stop, don't, come back ere." her mother said, mostly drunk and tired but with a small hint of remorse. But Peril wasn't taking it. If she wanted to apologize she could do it in the morning. "Goodnight, fuck you and ill see you in the morning." she stated in a final act of anger before slamming the door firmly shut. Shrouding her in pitch darkness with nothing but some recently startled dust for company.

First she lit a brazier (which thankfully still had a small pile of long dead wood in it) so she could see a bit. Then she heard crying. That would be from her mother. They were loud and exasperated with occasional screams resembling a dying animal mixed in, but still too real to be a pity act. Peril felt a bit of remorse. But then hardened herself. "She deserves it." she thought. "Teach her to treat me like trash. I don't care if you're drunk. If you are going to throw shit at me you can go throw yourself of a cliff." she stomped over to an alcove to sleep. Then she was hit with another thought. ' what am i thinking? That's my mother out here crying because of me and my 1st thought is "hope that taught you a lesson"? What is wrong with me?" she layed down. "Wait. i know what's wrong with me. Scarlet. SHE stunted me. SHE made me an asshole psycho-killer." she was content to go to sleep with that answer and hopefully burn the rest of Scarlet's face off in a dream. But her mind wasn't done yet. "Yeah. and yet I stayed." argued another part of her mind. " Of course I did." the other argued back "I thought i had to eat those black rocks."

"And you didn't ask anyone else about these rocks? Or sneak out and try to live off the land?"

"Scarlet pulled the poison on me. I just thought it as fact before I could figure out those ideas."

"And I could still eat other food just fine? And those 1st few days where just flukes where the magic non rock digestion filter didn't kick in? Cmon, I'm smarter than that. I stayed for the killing. I loved the killing and Scarlet knew it. She may have used it, but I was the one who had it. I killed people for her without question. Without even order. I'm a monster. And I had this chance. This chance to not screw up and show I'm better than that.

And I blew it.

And with that thought tunneling down into her brain, Peril joined her mother in her sorrow until they both cried themselves to sleep.