A/N: This is the (currently) the third installment of my Xander-Loki Series. As I've stated before, I've posted quite a lot on Twisting the Hellmouth and this viginette is one of the more recent ones I've written, however it's placement in this storyline's timeline is the reason why I'm posting this now instead of further down the line. This is a sequel to Chapters 99 and 104.
The First (BtVS-Marvel)
"Pathetic," said a green clad man wearing a golden circlet with two over-sized horns.
Xander sighed. "I've been wondering when you'd get to me. Though I wonder how you're able to take that form, considering I'm still alive."
"There are many ways to die- some of them are even permanent," The First Evil said while in the guise of Loki Laufeyson. "I 'died' a little more than two decades ago and was reborn as you, a pathetic excuse for humanity. I am ashamed at what I've been reduced to."
Xander shrugged. "Both you and the person you decided to play dress up as, I'm told, have always had an over-inflated sense of worth."
"If that's true then it's to make up for your complete lack of worth, both real and imagined," Loki sneered.
"I'm worth ten of you," Xander rebutted.
Loki let out a loud laugh. "You don't honestly believe that, do you?"
The form then morphed into Buffy.
"You're practically useless, what with us having to save you all the time," Buffy mocked. "No real powers or special abilities. Not any you could use any way. To think all those times you could have come through for us, only to fall short because you are a pathetic excuse for a normal human!"
The First then shifted into Joyce Summers' form. "You could have saved me, Xander."
Its' form shifted again.
"The both of us," Tara Maclay said.
And again.
"The three of us," Jenny Calender added.
And again.
"The four of us," the voice and form of Harmony Kendall stated.
"Five, if you count me," said Larry Blaisdell, as The First shifted once more. "Why couldn't you save me? Did I really make you that uncomfortable?"
"Just how many people could you have saved that you didn't?" Jesse McNally asked. "Of course it all worked out for you, didn't it? You got the girl I dreamed of being with for years."
"Or perhaps you could have prevented me from going to hell," Angel stated before he snorted in amusement. "Not that you would have done something like that even if it was in your power to do so. After all, once I was out of the way, you had a decent shot at Buffy- only you screwed that up too."
"Because you know deep inside, you are me," Loki took over. He chuckled. "You can feel them, can't you? The bindings. They're weakening, unravelling. And Sif has no idea that it was her who unleashed her most hated foe."
"How does it feel to be alone and afraid in the dark?" Jenny asked. "Just like I was in my final moments with Angelus before he killed me."
"To have something insanely big and powerful ready to devour you at a moment's notice," Larry added. "Ready to swallow you whole the moment you put your guard down."
"But then, you're a loser. You always have been!" Harmony added as The First shifted once more.
"It's only a matter of time before you fail to save my daughters like you failed to save me," Joyce sneered at Xander.
"Enough!" Xander said at last, lashing out with power he didn't know he had, blowing a hole through the wall.
Jesse stood between Xander and the wall, completely unharmed. "I'm a being older than gods and demons alike. Even in your prime, you couldn't harm me, Loki. You know, Jesse used to look up to you. You were his hero."
The First then shifted into the form of Jonathan Levinson. "You were a lot of people's hero, Xand, until Summers came along. You stood up to bullies, got decent enough grades in the advanced classes without having to put the work and effort everyone else did- even without Willow's help. Heck, you even talked regularly with the most beautiful, most popular girl in the school on a regular basis- even if all you guys ever did was snipe at each other."
"But then you became the Slayer's little pet," said the First as he shifted into Spike's form. "Nothing more than a lap dog she kept around for amusement."
"Though heaven knows how long that will last now," Joyce said as the First shifted into her form. "Buffy was always so afraid of Loki, afraid of you. How long until your limited usefulness runs out and you're cast aside again for those less capable than you? After all, she did it when you were just human, who says she won't do it again despite you having the powers of a god."
"You might wear her face, but you are NOT Joyce Summers," Xander said with a deathly chill in his voice. "Or Tara or Miss Calendar or any number of people I care about. I don't care if you show up as 'me', or Jesse, Captain Hair Gel, The Ungrateful Dead or anyone else- I KNOW who I am and what I can do. I'm not that scared teenager suffering from years of abuse who had to struggle daily with finding my own sense of worth. I'm not the punk kid who just recently lost his girlfriend over a stupid mistake with his best friend. I'm not that guy anymore whose existence was so wrapped up in his friends that losing them would have meant my end. I no longer fear following in the footsteps of either my mortal parents or my old self because at the end of the day, I KNOW who I am. I KNOW what I can do. My will is unshakable."
The First shifted into Loki once more. This time, he bore chains- shackles that were slightly worn and rusted. "How certain of that are you?"
"I am the stone on which the foundation is built," Xander said looking Loki directly in the eyes. "Not even the All-Father himself could bend me to his whims and even now the chains of fate struggle to contain me. What people call me is irrelevant. I am Alexander Loki Harris. Whether I'm a regular mortal, or an Asgardian God in human form, I am me. White Knight, Fallen God, regular every man- with a little bit extra. I stand against the Darkness- you and your ilk are repugnant and abhorrent to me. Begone from my sight and not bother me again. I may not be able to harm you NOW, but I WILL find a way." Without realizing it, he manifested his old staff, the jewel set in the head glowing brightly.
Loki's form gave way to Jesse's as he stepped in close to Xander with a smirk. "This little visit was never about you- or eroding that indomitable will power. I have the total combined memories of both Jesse McNally and Loki Laufeyson- supplemented by mortals you loved as family. You were always the most dangerous of the bunch- even before you became something more. The best I could do before was minimalize you by making this about those in 'The Chosen Crowd'- those with special powers and abilities. Finding out that you and Laufeyson were one and the same was an unexpected boon."
With that, The First vanish and through the hole in the wall, Xander could see the faces of nearly everyone in the house. The looks of fear and uncertainty on the potentials and the absolute terror and horror on Anya and Buffy's faces, not to mention Kennedy's and Spike's, spoke volumes. He closed his eyes in concentration, forcing out the doubt and desolation he was now feeling and waved his hand. The last anyone saw was Xander's, or Loki's, staff dematerializing as the wall reformed itself.