Chapter Fourteen: 30 Minutes or Less Prison Break
Narcissa took Ariel's teacup full of wine from her then lightly grabbed her by the wrist, transporting them from the garden to inside the mansion. As the witch expected, Ariel hadn't acquired the leg muscles yet for apparition and crash-landed on the wooden floorboards. She helped her up then handed her back her cup which hadn't spilled a drop.
"Thanks," Ariel said sheepishly as she took a swig from her cup to dull the pain in her backside from where she fell. She glanced around their new location and knew at once Narcissa chose to start the tour with the in-home laboratory. Her eyes widened with delight spotted shelves upon shelves of jarred ingredients all of which were kept labeled, alphabetized, kept evenly apart, and, most impressively, completely dust-free. "Oh, my cod…Your lab is…gorgeous." Ariel punctuated her awe with a sharp gasp for her blue eyes found a giant golden cauldron sitting against the corner. Her heart nearly exploded from her chest as she drew closer and discovered, "Oh, my fucking COD! Is this the Deluxe Circe Self-Stirrer 5000?!"
"Yes," Narcissa informed with a closed-lipped smile as Ariel dashed over to the cauldron, with the zeal of a child who spotted a coveted toy.
Ariel felt delirious standing before such a creation, who captured her wheezing reflection in its smooth golden base. "Oh, my cod…" She ran her hand against the cauldron's rim. She couldn't help but let out a high-pitched squeal at the soft feel. "Ahhh!"
Her excited scream was heard by Bellatrix who was two doors down, taking her jealous rage out on a room full of red-wigged mannequins. She apparated herself to the laboratory to investigate, asking her sister when she arrived, "What happened? Are you okay?" Narcissa nodded at Ariel, who had crouched down to her knees to embrace the base of the cauldron, resting her face against the fat golden belly, whispering, "I love you."
Narcissa gave confused Bellatrix a closed-lipped grin and explained, "Our esteemed guest wanted a tour of the estate."
"Ah," Bellatrix said, giving her sister a knowing smile before she turned her attention to Ariel and said, "You know, Ariel, I almost forgot to congratulate you on your potion maker's publication."
Ariel might have kept on shamelessly whispering her love to the cauldron had Bellatrix's comment not piqued her vanity. Flattered, Ariel stood up and curtsied at the witch, saying, "Thank you! I couldn't tell you how many times I submitted to the magazine before they finally accepted something from me."
"Well," Bellatrix said with a wide-toothed smile as she took the bottle of wine from Narcissa, walked over to Ariel and refilled the teacup that sat beside her on the floor, "Cheers to you on becoming an official potions-maker."
Ariel clinked her cup into the width of the wine bottle before she swallowed the whole of the content. Within seconds, she felt the blood in her body warm and her brain cells start to buzz pleasantly.
Bellatrix was refilling her teacup when she asked, "So tell me about this creation of yours. What does it do? And what inspired you to make it?"
"Aw, thank you for asking. It's called the Voice Disguiser Potion. And, basically, it'll change your voice into any speaking creature so long as you have their spit." Ariel laughed a little too loudly when she explained, "See, I got the idea because…You see, a hundred years—wait, no a hundred and fifty years ago? Whatever. Back in the day, I used to hang out with pirates quite a lot. And you know pirates. Fun as hell but damned if those drunk bastards don't know how to behave. So anyway, one of my friends, Jack, got arrested for piracy—which is a bum rap in my opinion. I mean, how come its imperialism when politicians pillage and plunder countries for their sugar and rum but it's piracy when a bunch of drunks on their own boat does the same thing?"
"That's terrible." Narcissa agreed. "Was your friend…?"
"Oh, that Wiley Bastard got out fine without my help," Ariel assured. "But it did make me ask myself if only there was a way for me to lend my non-mermaid friend my magical voice so he could talk his way out of getting wrongfully executed. Or you know, prank each other. And that's when it hit me. So, to make a long story short, I spent the last…oh…century perfecting the formula? Finally figured out the ratio last year. And bam! You are looking at a published potions maker."
"Wait," Narcissa spoke up slowly. "So, this potion not only disguises your voice but it can transfer magical properties over to the drinker?"
Ariel nodded, proudly. "Pretty cool, huh?"
Bellatrix and Narcissa exchanged befuddled glances before Narcissa said to Ariel, "Have you…used it?"
"To prank people?" Ariel inquired blankly.
"To break people out of prison," Bellatrix said.
"Oh, yeah," Ariel said as she pushed herself to her feet. She walked over to Bellatrix to refill her cup, saying as the witch poured the bottle, "I actually had to help break out the same friend." She laughed when she raised the cup to her purpled lips and explained, "He got caught summoning the Kraken. Again." She shook her head after she took her sip. "I told that idiot not to but you know how hard-headed pirates can be."
"Where was your friend sentenced?" Bellatrix asked, almost breathlessly.
"Azkaban."
The two sisters exchanged another set of bewildered glances. How could this be? They asked another silently. Is it really too good to be true?
"You broke your friend out of Azkaban?" Narcissa asked.
"Uh-huh."
"Without the news finding out?" Bellatrix asked, nearly dumbfounded.
"It's not that hard," Ariel replied. "The dementors at that place are dumber than jellyfish. Plus, most of the guards there aren't paid enough to check on the prisoners every hour like they're supposed to."
Narcissa gave her sister a look asking her to confirm this fact.
Bellatrix nodded. "It's true. I used to go whole days without being checked on by a guard."
Narcissa whipped her head at Ariel with big, wet brown eyes. She thought about bribing her with the Deluxe Circe Self-Stirrer 5000. If that wouldn't work, she would've given her all the gold in her Gringott's account. She would've given her any bit of jewelry, clothing, her loyalty, her life, anything the siren asked for. But looking into Ariel's blushing face, her eyes soft with tipsiness, she realized then that now was the best time to appeal to the woman's recklessness.
"I call bullshit," Narcissa said.
"I agree," Bellatrix said. "There's no way you can break someone out of Azkaban that easily without being detected."
The content from Ariel's face faded into unmitigated cockiness. "Wanna bet?"
Narcissa raised the nearly empty bottle of wine and declared, "A bottle of wine says you can't break my husband out of Azkaban."
"What's your husband's name?"
"Lucius Malfoy."
Ariel scoffed. "You better stick a fresh one in some ice then. Because I'm going to have that guy back home for you in thirty minutes or less."
Narcissa smiled at her, then at her sister, then back at Ariel. She extended her hand to the pseudo-siren, giving her a cursory shake as she said, "It's a bet."
Ariel dropped her hand only to find Bellatrix's hand slipping into hers a second later. She glanced at the dark-haired witch, who told her, half-mockingly "Hang on, Lady Ariel." With that, they disappeared from the laboratory in a dizzying wind.
Moments later, they were on Azkaban grounds being pelted at by strong winds and freezing ocean spray. Ariel managed to lock her knees in time and landed on dead, frosted grass upright. Before she was the massive, black towering pit of despair otherwise known as Azkaban. Ariel craned her head to look for the top of the prison but it disappeared in the stormy clouds above. She then glanced at Bellatrix who had her arms folded across her chest, smirking. An hourglass dangled out of her robe's pocket swinging violently in the blustery air.
Determined, Ariel made her way to the formidable entrance. A sixteen-hundred-meter iron door covered in spikes, bearing a sign that said WELCOME TO AZKABAN THE UNHAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH. Unsure of what to do, she cleared her throat then cried out in her loudest voice, "I'm here to visit Lucius Malfoy!"
A few moments of silence past before one of the iron doors cracked open. A dementor came out to greet her, its cold faceless visage peering down at her like it wanted nothing more than to gobble her soul whole.
"I am Lucius Malfoy's attorney and I need to speak with him at once," Ariel ordered, authoritatively as she shivered from the torrents of gelid water raining down on her.
The dementor did nothing for a while, merely floated there, ominously. As if trying to determine her lies from truth. But she was flush with liquid courage and locked eyes with the faceless ghoul, who eventually turned around and, to Bellatrix's delight, led her inside the prison.
Ariel followed the creature for what felt like an eternity through the cold, unwelcoming corridors. She had to keep her eyes focused on the back of the dementor's raggedy robes as she felt the dead-eyes of every prisoner they passed follow them and burn against her soaked body. She wasn't afraid of their leers more than she was terrified by their haunted wraith-like faces. None of them even bothered to catcall her. They said nothing, knew nothing, dreamt of nothing but suffering.
Eventually, the dementor halted and angled itself at a cell. Ariel peered inside. A man with scraggly white-blonde hair laid in a heap against the concrete floor on his bed which was nothing more than a thin, uncomfortable-looking mattress and a small threadbare blanket, too little or thin to bring any real warmth, especially in such a chilling place. He didn't even lift his head when she stuck her face in-between the metal bars to get a closer look at him. His face was obscured by the shadowy cell.
Ariel turned to the dementor and told it, "Open the cell."
Slowly, the dementor compiled but even when the cell opened with a creak the prisoner didn't show signs of noticing them. It wasn't until Ariel stepped inside and told the dementor to give them privacy, did the man turn his head to address her.
He was so bony and pale he was looked like a skeleton, swallowed up in his black and white striped uniform. "Who are you?" He had a voice like broken glass.
Ariel shushed him and glanced over her shoulder, making sure the corridor was empty before she turned to him and said, "My name's Ariel and I am here to win a bet."
Bellatrix hummed patiently while she watched the sand pass through her hourglass. The siren still had ten minutes to lose the bet.
A sound broke her from her daydreaming and she snapped her neck from her hourglass to find Ariel calmly walking out of the prison entrance dragging her skittish-looking brother-in-law by the elbow.
She waited for alarms to go off. For the angry voices of guards to break the air. But none of that happened. And Bellatrix unleashed a wicked laugh as Ariel and Lucius walked over to her.
"Told you it's not that hard to break out of Azkaban," Ariel said with a bratty smile as she laced her fingers with Lucius's and reached for Bellatrix's hand.
"Well, I stand corrected," Bellatrix replied with a cat-like grin as their fingers intertwined, readying themselves for departure. "I got to admit I severely underestimate you."