Arc 1—Chapter 3:

When we walked through the gate to Whiterun again on the seventh day after our departure from the city, I wasn't happy in the least. Lydia's snide harping, which had returned with a vengeance on the morning of our departure from Morthal (following a quick stop at the jarl's hall), hadn't helped. Her occasional teasing about the "nice walk" had made it even worse. I feel bad about it now but giving her an extra set of armor and a massive battle axe to carry caused her to fall a few steps behind me, where I was spared from having to listen to her, at least some of the time.

The weight of our backpacks and what we were carrying in hand also contributed to my own foul mood. The packs were heavy, full-to-bursting with weapons and armor that we'd taken from our fallen enemies on our journey, and we each had several sacks of other items tied on the outside. Therefore, dead-tired, we stopped to see the blacksmiths just inside the city gate.

Ulf War-Bear bought most of the better stuff in the shop, where, when not entertaining customers, he cleaned, polished, and re-laced their wares to make them more presentable for sale. Outside, his wife (and their head blacksmith), Adrianne, looked over the rest and bought most of it, saying she could do minor repairs and still sell it at a profit. She even helped me repair my armor, made some more fit adjustments to it, and then assisted Lydia with hers.

The smarmy shop owner next to the market on the other end of Gate Street—I'm sorry, I don't even remember his name—helped improve our resources while further lightening our packs and emptying most of the sacks. Finally, we stopped at the local alchemist's shop, where the nice lady sold me a potion to cure my case of the rattles that I hadn't even known I had (Grandson, as a special aside, it turns out that a second opinion in such cases may be a very wise idea). We also swapped several potions we'd found for a couple of her special healing brews.

With our packs so much lighter, Lydia's attitude improved. She even quit repeating her usual comment about being sworn to carry my burdens for a little while after that. However, she became inquisitive when I said we had to make a quick stop at the Temple of the Dead Tree, which was, at that time, a popular nickname for Kynareth's local establishment.

"Why, Thane?"

"Just need to make a delivery. Won't take but a moment. You can stay out here and look at this wonderful reminder of why trees should never be allowed to get too big. They're next to impossible to remove when they finally die."

It took me longer inside than expected, leading Lydia to give me a frown when I returned. "Having the healer take a look at that nasty chafing issue?"

"Nooo...but she did spend considerable time trying to talk me into fixing the bloody tree. I told her I'd love to help, but charity work, even for one of the Divines, isn't exactly high on my priority list right now."

"So what is, Thane? What's next?"

As I started walking down the steps toward the marketplace, I nodded toward The Bannered Mare. "I've got to go check on our girl."

"Your girl, Thane. Your charity. As much as you're spending on her, you might as well adopt the kid."

"Yeah, right."

~ESV~

Hulda said the little girl was eating better, but that she was still begging for money and that she refused to sleep inside the inn. "She's frightened and confused but I think she just doesn't want to be any more beholden to anyone than she already is. Have you said something to scare her?" There was a touch of concern bordering on anger in her expression.

I shook my head in reply. "No, Hulda, I haven't even seen her since that time in the marketplace and she isn't beholden to me in the least. I'm just trying to keep from having nightmares of seeing her starve to death."

She forced a smile, apparently relieved that I might not be some evil fiend after all, so I switched to my other reason for being there.

"Speaking of death, Lydia suggested that I check with you on any bounty work that might be available. Got anything like that?"

"Yeah. The guards drop off bounty letters from time to time if there are bandits, giants, trolls, or such causing trouble. The jarl pays to have them taken care of."

"Lydia said the jarl usually specifies 'dead' but occasionally allows for a 'dead or alive' to come through. Got any of the dead or alive type?"

"Sorry, these are all the 'kill the bandit' type. The jarl usually prefers them dead so he doesn't have to feed or house them. That way, they don't come back later to cause him problems again, either. You have a problem with that?"

"No, not at all. It's just me. While I don't mind tracking them down and bringing them back, I'm just not sure I want to be responsible for dispensing the jarl's justice."

She gave me a frown, as if I was being silly. "Well, if you accept one of these, that's what you'll be getting paid for. The jarl's already pronounced them guilty, so all you're doing is carrying out the sentence. You still don't look happy about it."

I sighed. "I got caught in one of those deals a little while back when I was innocent and almost went to the block before the sentence was 'overturned.' Just not sure if I feel comfortable facing guys who might be innocent like me."

"Believe me, Dragonborn, if they're in this stack, they're guilty and there won't be any sentences overturned. You want one or not?"

Another sigh. "Yeah. Give me one."

She hesitated. "So...are you going to tell me to keep feeding the urchin while you go do this?"

A little bag of coins already palmed in my hand moved forward to hers as I nodded.

It was her turn to sigh. "That's what I figured. Let's see, I think there might be something here that would be up your alley."

Reaching under the counter, she retrieved several papers in a stack, sorted through them, and finally pulled one out of the middle. "Here's one you might be able to handle without risking my coin purse...or my conscience."

~ESV~

The bandits were far tougher than Hulda or I had imagined, and if not for Lydia, I wouldn't be here to record this tale. The battleaxe clove the top edge of my shield, driving it back where the front of the blade cut deep into my arm, just below my armor. In addition to paralyzing my arm, the blow caused me to I stagger backward and I would have been at the bandit lord's mercy if not for Lydia stepping in from the side and driving her sword into him before bashing him with her shield. Having the larger axe in his hands with the blade stuck in my shield, this put him at a great disadvantage; Lydia dispatched him with another thrust and twist of her weapon.

"Thane!" she cried as she dropped to her knees beside me. I'd already lost a lot of blood in the fight even before the latest wound, so the world was starting to growing dim as she grabbed me and clamped a hand on my arm. "Don't you die on me, you son-of-a-horker. Don't...you...die!"

She was pressing something to my lips at about that point, and the gentle, soothing sensation that followed caused the pain to lessen. Somehow, I realized that she was wasting one of our two precious healing potions, so I tried to raise my hand to stop her from her foolishness, but she swatted it away. She then poured the other one in my mouth, and massaging my throat to make me swallow it, too. I was feeling significantly better, though exhausted, when she told me just moments later to sleep. I don't know why I remember it so clearly considering what had just happened, but as I was drifting off, I felt her rub my cheek and say, "I like your razor."

~ESV~

Between the potions and a good night's sleep, I was able to get up the next morning rather than finding myself in Sovngarde or somewhere far less desirable. As such, I decided to skip my first thought of chastising Lydia for wasting our potions, and immediately decided that we would have to purchase more of those when we returned to town.

After thanking her for saving me, I found that Lydia had also repaired my armor as well as she could and had collected everything of any possible value in the bandits' lair. We went through it together, upgraded a few pieces of our equipment, and then selected almost exactly what she'd predicted would likely be most valuable for sale based on its weight. We hid the rest away in hopes that we might return for more of the loot in a couple of days.

That didn't happen, but between selling our haul and the bounty for the bandits, we earned a decent amount. I tried to give Lydia a share, but she refused, saying it was her duty to serve me, not get rich off of me. I felt bad that she refused but far worse that she felt our little haul was enough to make her rich.

Hulda gave me another bounty paper from her stack as I pushed more coins across the counter to her. She shook her head and sent half back my way. "The child doesn't eat that much and you're already paid up over a week ahead anyway. I better see you back here in a few days, Dragonborn."

~ESV~

Two nights later, Lydia and I were practically exhausted. It had been a long and bloody but successful day so we took turns cleaning up in the creek while the other stood guard before finding shelter in an abandoned shack. After a meal consisting of some food we'd found in the late bandits' lair, I caught Lydia studying me.

"Okay, what is it? Did I spill something on my shirt?"

She was slow to reply as her eyes focused on my armor. "No-oo. Not that I see. Of course with your armor covering it…"

"Then what's wrong?"

"I just don't understand you, Thane. This afternoon, when that bandit yielded, you seemed almost relieved to accept his surrender. Well, 'till he pulled the knife on you, anyway. You were lucky he didn't gut you from bottom to top, by the way. Don't you know that bandits never really yield?"

"Yeah, I figured it was probably a trick, but I had to give him a chance in case he was telling the truth."

"Why? Even if you'd tied him up and marched him all the way back to Whiterun, the jarl would have gotten rid of him anyway."

"Probably so, but then it would have been the jarl's doing, serving his justice, and not me having to kill him. Killing's dirty, messy business and I prefer to avoid it when I can. Why do you think I wanted to be a blacksmith rather than a soldier or guard?"

"Gods' bones! You're the bloody Dragonborn and you've killed, what? Three dragons, more bandits than I can count, and those creepy draugr things? And you don't like to kill?"

"Just two dragons. You can't count the first one since it would have eaten me whole if Irileth and the guards hadn't taken it out. As for liking it, no. While I'm finding that I'm getting better at it, it's not something I enjoy. I'll do it, whatever it takes, in fact, to protect myself or you or someone else that I care about, for that matter, but I don't have to enjoy it. Not one bit."

"Well, when you put it that way...I guess I see what you mean. It's not like I really enjoy it either, but it's what I do, so I've never thought about it."

"Guess that's the difference, Lydia. Until recently, I didn't have to do it, so when I killed that first man while escaping from Helgen, it came crashing down on me."

She slowly nodded, as if she understood.

I pause in my writing, thinking of the rest of that evening. Our discussion had strayed into family and love and feelings. It went much deeper than I intended, leading me to finally realize, despite how obvious it must have been, that Lydia had been quite jealous of that young woman in Morthal ever since that night, even though I didn't know how I felt about her.

When Lydia kissed me, it came as a surprise to me; it was far more passionate than anything I'd ever received from Dreanna, but like those kisses with Dre, it was one-sided. This time, though, it was Lydia who was the hungry one and I was the hesitant. Having grown to think of Lydia as a sister-in-arms, or, even closer, as a sister, I apologized to her and pulled away for it was at that moment I understood for the first time that I would do whatever it took to see the young lady in Morthal again.

~ESV~

This trip ended up going better than the last, and I came out with a much better bow than my old one. Lydia liked the war axe that I sharpened for her, too. We stopped at Adrianne and the War-Bear's shop on the way into town and sold them almost everything we'd taken on our trip.

It was when Adrianne was doing a little repair on my cuirass that she stopped for a moment and wiped her grimy brow. She looked up at me and asked, "Have you thought about buying a house here in town? The one next to our shop's been empty for a good while. You might talk to my dad about it up at the castle."

"Your dad mentioned that one was available for purchase, but he didn't say where. I may ask him about it."

"Good luck, if you do, and don't let him cheat you on the price. The roof needs some repairs, and there's a hole in that back corner where skeevers can get in. Make him knock off a few hundred septims and I'll get Ulf to give you a good deal on getting them fixed."

~ESV~

It took another bounty trip before I could afford the little house and a bit of furniture, and then some more coins to get War-Bear to repair the roof.

I fixed the hole in the wall myself while Lydia took it on herself to stand guard to protect me, presumably from dragons, skeevers, or the happy little imps that made a habit of tearing through Whiterun's streets amid near constant chattering and frequent raucous laughter.

Adrianne and Ulf came over that evening with an apple pie—I had no idea how the woman had time to make it—and we shared great pie and excellent company. Lydia started to retire to her room, but she stayed at my request and seemed to enjoy herself with our company, the pie, and a bottle of Surilie Brothers that I opened for our guests. Later that evening, she even asked Adrianne if she could teach her how to make it sometime. Adrianne laughed and looked to her husband. "Honey, can you show her? My smelter is the only oven I know how to use."

After the smiths left, I locked the front door and set a small alarm consisting of a little bell on a string. I hoped it would ring if someone tried to break in on us while we slept. I was about to head upstairs when I noticed Lydia looking into the little storage room downstairs.

"What's wrong, Lydia. Did you find another hole in the wall?"

"No, nothing like that. I just noticed that you might have room for an extra bed or two in there. A child-sized one, at least. If you're interested. Good night, Thane."

~ESV~

It was the next morning when a knock came at the door. I hadn't slept well, so I was yawning as I opened the door to find a thin and dusty young man holding a sealed letter out to me.

"Courier from Riverwood, Dragonborn. I had to check the palace to find you, so sorry it's later than planned."

The young man received a few septims for his efforts and I closed the door. Using my dagger, I pried up the wax seal, observing that it hadn't been disturbed. I read through it twice with Lydia watching me. I nodded and she came over to have a look. She read it aloud with an appropriate level of snarkiness that wasn't far removed from her usual demeanor.

"Did you not find my message? Or are you not really who it is claimed? If you truly are the Dragonborn and if you care in even the least for our land, come to the Sleeping Giant Inn in Riverwood and request the attic room. Someone will contact you there."

I was chuckling at her delivery when she looked at me with an expression of concern. "You told me earlier, Thane, that it was an obvious trap, but now you look as if you're going to put your head in the noose anyway. Please tell me I'm wrong."

"No, Lydia, not wrong, but not exactly right either. Most people who bait traps try to set them so they won't be obvious. They don't usually beg as if they're desperate. This may actually be real, so I...I'm going. But I want you there as backup in case I'm wrong."

She sighed, dramatically, and said, "I'm sworn to—"

"I know! I know! Listen, I'll pack our things and speak with Ulf and Adrianne about watching the house. While I'm doing that, please run this up to Hulda, the innkeeper at The Bannered Mare. Tell her we'll be back soon."

~ESV~