Sakura clenched her fists and made to speak but Kondou silenced her by raising his hand. "I know what you're going to say, Sakura-san and my answer is no. This is not about us anymore. If I allow you to come even as a medic, word will spread like wildfire. If the wrong people were to learn of your presence here, it would only mean disaster. I'm certain you have no wish to start a war between your village and the Imperial nobles."

Gritting her teeth, Sakura turned her gaze away wordlessly. Because regardless of her own feelings, Kondou was right. If the Satsuma and Choshu forces took wind of her identity as a foreign official operating in Edo territory in secret, that could possibly drag Konoha into the conflict. She could be labeled a spy. There was no doubt that in an effort to mitigate the backlash, the Shogun would denounce not only the alliance but also the Shinsengumi as a whole for harboring her. Konoha would be in a very precarious position and who knows what would happen to Kondou and the others.

Damn it all!

She felt a hand on her back, and she shifted her eyes to Sanosuke, who was standing beside her. His expression remained unreadable, and he was not even looking at her, but she could feel his thumb rubbing comforting circles on her lower back.

"Toshizo and I have already started preparations." Kondou looked each of his captains in the eye. "Saito, Nagakura, Harada, get ready. We're leaving for war tomorrow at dawn."

Something inside Sakura broke.

XxxxX

"Are you sure you have everything?"

"Yes, Sakura."

"The soldier pills I made you?"

"Yep."

"The roll of bandages?"

"That too."

"The jars of healing ointment?"

"I'm positive they are in my bag. Where you put them. Ten minutes ago."

Sakura scowled, and whacked him on the head. "Don't get smart with me, Todou. I can kill you in your sleep and make it look like an accident."

Heisuke laughed and put his hands up in mock surrender. "I get it, Sakura-chan. You're worried. It's already been a month since the others left and now, I'm leaving too. It's a lot to deal with, especially for someone like you. It's in your nature to care and worry about people."

Sakura sighed dejectedly, his words hitting too close to home for her liking. You have no idea, Heisuke…No idea…She looked up at him when she felt his hand on her shoulder.

Todou flashed her a grin. "But I'm telling you this now, Sakura-chan. You don't have to worry about me. I'm only recruiting new soldiers, after all. You shouldn't worry about the others either though. Saito, Nagakura, Harada, Kondou…They are some of the most capable people I've ever met. They'll come back soon enough, you'll see."

Despite the situation, Sakura found herself smiling and her spirits lifted. Touched by his words and attempt to make her feel better, Sakura threw her arms around his middle and hugged him tightly. He returned her embrace without a moment's hesitation.

"You be careful and come back alive, you hear me? I mean it, Todou."

The young man laughed and saluted her good-naturedly. "Aye, ma'am! It's a promise!" He adjusted his bag on his back and put a hand on the hilt of his sword. "Well, I'm off. Sakura-chan, Hijitaka. I'll see you guys soon!"

Hijikata, who up until then hadn't said a word, nodded. "Take care, Todou. We'll await your return."

Sakura watched him walk away with a sad frown on her face. "You come back in one piece, Todou Heisuke! Remember your promise!" she yelled after him.

Heisuke flashed her a grin over his shoulder. "I won't ever forget, Sakura-chan! Wait for me!"

"I promise! You hear me, Todou? I promise!"

She and Hijikata remained at the gates until they could no longer see Heisuke in the distance. The young woman sighed, feeling the weight of everyone's absence heavy on her shoulders.

"They'll be fine."

Surprised, she turned to look at the man beside her. "Hijikata-san?"

"Todou, Nagakura, Saito, Harada…They will all be fine."

She looked down at her feet. "I…I'm just really worried, Hijikata-san. I keep thinking that one or more of them might not come back."

"That's disrespectful."

Her eyes widened and she looked up at the man in surprise.

"All these men put their lives in your hands willingly," he continued, turning around to leave. He glanced at her over his shoulder. "They trust you to keep them alive when the time calls for it. Do them the same courtesy. Trust them with their lives. Have faith in their resolve to return."

Without waiting for her reply, Hijikata walked away, leaving Sakura to mull over his words.

He…He is right.

Despite Hijikata's stern voice, she knew that he was right, and that the man only intended to cheer her up. She absently wondered if he said all those things to her just because he needed to take his own advice too. These men were his friends, they had grown up together.

They will come back. Nagakura, Saito…They will come back.

Smiling softly to herself, she stared off in the distance.

You'll come back to me, won't you, Sano-kun?

XxxxX

The next morning, she rose before dawn feeling restless.

Deciding that she would not be getting back to sleep anytime soon, Sakura got dressed and went in search of something to occupy herself with until it was time to head to town for her usual rounds. As fortunate as it was that the infirmary was finally empty of injured soldiers, it still left her without anything to do until noon each day.

The compound was still fairly quiet, though she was almost certain Hijikata was already up and working. She was in the process of entertaining the idea of breakfast and tea, when she spied Souji's form sitting alone in the garden. She knew for a fact that his patrols didn't start for at least another couple of hours, so it was curious to see him up and about so early. Souji never missed the chance to sleep in.

Could his lungs be giving him trouble?

Frowning, Sakura approached him, making sure to make enough noise so as not to startle him.

She sat down beside him but didn't say a thing. She knew that Souji was a private person, and he would not appreciate her prying, regardless of her good intentions. They had come a long way, and it would be a cold day in hell before she knowingly did anything to jeopardize their friendship.

"What are you doing up, Pinky?"

Sakura smiled. "I could ask you the same, Okita."

He shrugged. "Couldn't sleep."

Despite his frugal reply, the medic understood. "Aa. I couldn't either." I'm worried too.

Taking advantage of their proximity, Sakura laid her head on Souji's shoulder, releasing a deep sigh. "I hope your lungs are not giving you any trouble."

She felt him shake his head. "Nah, I feel fine. No coughing, no trouble breathing. Just peachy."

The young woman smiled, feeling her mood brighten. "That is great to hear, Okita-kun. At this rate, give it another month of healing sessions, and you'll be as good as new."

"Aa."

They fell into comfortable silence, watching the sun rise in the distance, and Sakura felt herself relax. Involuntarily, she pressed herself closer to Okita, reveling in the warmth of his body against the early morning chill. Her eyelids started to drop, and her muscles relaxed as Souji's comforting company chased away her worries for a bit.

She hummed under her breath when she felt a pull at her hair, and suddenly her view was obstructed by a curtain of pink locks.

"Huh?" She lifted her head to look at Souji questioningly, only to notice him holding the leader cord she used to tie her braid.

"I was curious. You always keep your hair in that braid." He spent a few seconds staring at her, his eyes searching her face. He reached out and put the locks falling in front of her eye behind her ear. "You should wear it down more often. It suits you."

Sakura was momentarily stunned by both his move and his forwardness, but then her eyes softened, and she smiled at him prettily. For Okita to be this vulnerable, this unguarded…It only spoke of how much the absence of his friends and Kondou was affecting him.

Don't worry, Okita. I got you now. You're not alone.

She linked her arm with his and laid her head on his shoulder once more. She giggled, glancing up at him in the corner of her eye.

"Aw, you're such a softie deep down, Souji-kun."

He huffed in annoyance, though judging by the blush coloring his cheeks, she knew he was not nearly as annoyed as he wanted to appear.

"Don't worry, Souji-kun. Your secret's safe with me!"

"Haruno?"

"Yes, sweetie pie?"

"Shut up."

Sakura simply laughed.

XxxxX

A few days later…

Sakura was a light sleeper by nature, and years of missions coupled with the intensity of war had honed her senses to an enviable degree.

So, when her sensitive ears caught the sound of someone running towards her room, she was on her feet before they even managed to knock.

She pulled the door open forcefully to find a panting Chizuru right outside her room.

"Chizuru-chan? What's wrong?"

"Sakura!" the young girl said, out of breath and looking upset. "The town! It's on fire!"

Sakura's eyes widened. "What?"

"A band of Choshu rebels! They are setting everything on fire!"

Cursing under her breath, Sakura grabbed her medical pouch, put on her combat boots and was sprinting out of her room in seconds. She glanced at Chizuru over her shoulder.

"Where are Hijikata and the others?"

"They have gathered outside the main hall. Hijikata-san sent me to fetch you."

Nodding in understanding, Sakura picked up her pace, mentally apologizing to the young girl behind her for pushing her so hard. "Let's go, Chizuru-chan!"

"Hai!"

When they reached the main hall, Hijikata and the captains that had stayed behind were already there.

"Hijikata-san!"

The man turned to look at her and nodded in greeting. "Haruno-san. I trust you're aware of what's going on."

"The fires. Why are the Choshu setting Kyoto on fire?"

"Their forces suffered a great loss. The Shogun's army is pushing them back, and they are losing ground. This is retaliation."

Sakura nodded thoughtfully, taking in Sannan's words. "Alright, we need to regroup. How many men do we have at our disposal-"

"We do not take orders from you, woman!"

The medic groaned inwardly. Of course Kanryusai would be here…

In the corner of her eyes, she noticed Souji take a threatening step towards the man, clearly ready to jump to her defense. Pinching the bridge of her nose, she took a deep breath to calm herself. "Kanryusai, now is not the right time-"

"Do not speak to me like that, wench!"

Alright, that's it!

Feeling the last remnants of her patience dissipating, Sakura marched up to him and pulled him down by the front of his uniform. "Ok, listen here, you spoiled brat. I've had it with your arrogance and holier-than-though attitude. Out there, there are people losing their families and their livelihoods while we stand here, listening to you running your mouth. We are going to regroup and aid those people. So, either do your part to help, or shut up and crawl back inside your hole while we do our job."

She released his robes, and the abrupt change caused him to lose his balance and stagger back. Not waiting for a reply – and she never expected one, in the first place – Sakura turned to Hijikata, who was staring at her with barely concealed interest.

"Now, how many men do we have at our disposal?"

"Not counting us here, three dozen."

Sakura nodded. "Good. They should be enough." Mission mode kicking in, Sakura turned to Okita. "Souji-kun, take ten men and search for the rebels causing the trouble. I doubt they stuck around after setting the fires, but let's not take any chances."

For a moment, Souji glanced at Hijikata, and Sakura worried that she had overstepped her bounds. After all, Hijikata was the Vice-Commander and she was only the medic. A medic who had just given his men orders and ridiculed one of his captains with her little outburst. If there was one thing she didn't want, that was to insult the man.

To her utter surprise, Hijikata nodded. "Souji, you heard Haruno-san." Then, he turned back to her once more. "What else would you have us do?"

Sakura was stunned for a moment, but she quickly regained her composure and her eyes hardened. "Keisuke-san, you take ten men as well. Help with the extinguishing of the fires. Catching the rebels will mean nothing if we don't save the town."

Sannan offered her his usual kind smile. "Consider it done, Sakura-san."

Taking a deep breath, Sakura turned to Toshizo. "Hijikata-san, take ten men with you and help evacuate the neighborhoods worst affected by the fires. See if anyone's trapped in their homes."

Toshizo nodded in understanding. "What are you going to do?"

"Chizuru-chan and I will take the remaining six men and tend to the injured." She turned to the young brunette beside her. "Chizuru-chan, I need you to run to the storage room and retrieve the ointment for burns we made the other day. The one in the large blue jar, remember? See if there are any rolls of bandages we could afford to spare."

"Yes! You can count on me, Sakura."

"Good. Get our supplies and come meet me at the gates."

Hijikata turned to the men gathered around. "You have your orders. Let's move out."

Sakura only prayed they were not too late.

XxxxX

The town was in pandemonium.

Sakura's stomach sank at the sight of the disaster, and she immediately started barking out orders to the men accompanying her and Chizuru.

"Check the houses and the alleys for survivors or people that require help. Bring them out in the open, away from debris. And please make sure to stay away from buildings that could potentially collapse on your heads."

They followed her instructions without delay or complaints, and for that she was thankful. If anything, her little show with Kanryusai had earned her at least a bit of respect.

Pulling up her sleeves, she turned to the brunette. "Chizuru-chan, we have to split up. You keep the ointment; I'll manage without it. You take the left side and I will take the right. Stay on the main road, and always within sight of one of us. We do not know if the rebels are still around. If anything happens, you scream for help and you run. Do you understand?"

The young woman nodded gravely.

"Good. Let's go save some lives."

The next few hours were spent with Sakura going from patient to patient, mending bones, and healing burns. She occasionally caught glimpses of Chizuru off to the left, and of Souji searching the town for any sign of the rebels. Once, he even ran up to her to see if she was alright. She was touched by his concern, and it served to lift her spirits amidst all the disaster around them.

Finding the kids was the worst part. Children who never managed to get out of their houses or who died from inhaling too much smoke. Sakura had always had trouble accepting the death of children. Even as a kunoichi, it always took her far too long to go back to normal after an Academy student left their last breath on her operating table.

She chose to keep Chizuru away from them. The girl was already traumatized enough by the sight of death and destruction. Sakura hated the idea of giving her more of a reason to be haunted by nightmares.

By the time dawn rolled around, they had counted sixty-five dead and more than a hundred injured. Sakura tended to every single one of them. Mothers and fathers, sons and daughters, siblings, and cousins. All of them had lost something, and Sakura tried to console them the best way she knew how, each tear-stained face chipping away at her soul.

She was working on a young mother who had lost her husband in the fire when Souji approached her from behind.

"Haruno, you need to stop. You've been at it for more than eight hours."

Sakura shook her head, holding her eyes open with difficulty. "I can't stop, Souji. Not until I make sure everyone's alright."

"You've checked everyone over already. This is your third round."

The young woman wiped her brow, her breathing labored. "I need to…I need to-" The light around her hands flickered out, and her vision swam as a bout of dizziness hit her.

"Hey, Haruno, are you-Sakura!"

She collapsed and Souji managed to catch her just a second before she hit the ground. Okita shook his head, cradling her to his chest.

"You insufferable woman. Harada will kill me if I let anything happen to you while he's gone."

The next few days, people grew familiar with the sight of an unconscious Sakura being carried back by Souji.

XxxxX

A couple of weeks after the fires…

Sakura stepped into the light of the rising sun, breathing in the chilly morning air. The day promised to be pleasant, and with the rebuilding of the neighborhoods that had suffered the most damage during the fires underway, she sincerely hoped it stayed that way.

She put her hand on the hilt of the sword she had taken up to carrying since the captains' departure for the front lines. The same sword Sanosuke had given her. Its weight was comforting, it kept her grounded. She had never been one to carry around weapons larger that her kunai as they tended to be a hindrance. When out in the field, knee-deep in a teammates guts and doing absolutely everything to save them, the last thing a medic wanted was a blade knocking around their feet or weighing on their back.

Still, she could no longer imagine herself without the red-wrapped sword against her hip. Being without it felt wrong, and she could not bear the thought of abandoning it in her room to collect dust.

Or…It's really the one that gave it to you that you're missing, you hypocrite…

She shook her head, determined not to let her mind wander down that path. Regardless of how painful the thought was, the possibility existed that Sanosuke wouldn't return. They hadn't heard a word from them in two months and each day that passed made that realization all the more difficult to accept. Sakura was no fool. She knew the numbers, she knew the statistics and the chances of survival. And she absolutely hated it.

Because Nagakura, and Hajime and Kondou were not numbers on a spreadsheet in her office.

Sanosuke was not just a nameless soldier whose life had been turned into a percentage.

What…What happens if he doesn't return?

She immediately pushed the notion out of her mind.

No! He promised. He will come back. He has to.

Sano…He couldn't die. Not when the thought of never seeing him again made her chest burn. Not when she was so confused regarding her feelings for him, though she had a pretty good idea of where she was headed.

Determined to shift her thoughts to more pleasant things, she made her way to the meal hall to find Genzaburou Inoue sitting outside, watching the sunlight sip through the foliage.

"Inoue-san, good morning!"

The man smiled at her kindly. "Haruno-san. Bright and early as usual."

She smiled at him. "Would you like some tea? I could use a cup."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to put you through all the trouble-"

She waved his concerns off. "No trouble at all, Inoue-san. You just sit tight, and I'll be back shortly."

True to her word, Sakura returned ten minutes later holding a tray laden with a steaming pot of freshly brewed green tea. Placing it between them, she poured the older captain a cup and sat down beside him. The man's presence was calm, and it radiated a kind of fatherly warmth that Sakura usually didn't see in hardened warriors. It was a pleasant change, and the woman found herself relaxing as she sipped her tea.

"Will you be joining the others in town today, Haruno-san?"

She nodded. "They need all the hands available, Inoue-san. And I also need to do my rounds. The sick and injured cannot be kept waiting."

"I admire your dedication, young lady, but you should probably take a bit of time for yourself too. From what I hear, Souji had to carry you back unconscious more than a dozen times these past two weeks."

The look in his eyes was reprimanding but caring, and she found herself smiling widely at him. "Come on, Inoue-san. I have to keep Souji busy somehow. Can't have him going soft on me, can I?"

The man chuckled, sipping at his tea. "Oh, I think he's already gone soft on you, Haruno-san. And he's not the only one."

Sakura stared at him strangely, but before she could ask him what he meant, her attention was drawn away by the sound of exuberant voices.

She raised an eyebrow, curious as to what could have caused such a commotion. She was about to stand to go check to see if anyone had gotten into some sort of fight when a figure came into view.

Sakura registered the sound of her teacup breaking, but she could not bring herself to care. Her hands flew to her mouth, her eyes wide.

"Heyo, Sakura-chan! Long time no see!"

"Shi-Shinpachi!" Jumping to her feet, she ran to him and started checking him over for injuries, desperate to make sure that he was well. "Does it hurt anywhere? Were you injured? Did you have to be patched up at any point? Did the medic do a good job-"

Laughing boisterously, Shinpachi stopped her ranting by pulling her in for a hug. He held her tight, pulling her so close that he lifted her off the ground. "I missed you, Sakura-chan! Things were so boring without you!"

Still buried in his embrace, Sakura chocked out a laugh. "Only you would find the front lines boring, Shin-kun. I missed you too. Do you have any idea how hard it is to joke around with Souji and Hijikata?"

Nagakura threw his head back and laughed, releasing his hold on her. "Have no fear, Sakura-chan! Your favorite Shinsengumi is back!"

"Really? Is Hajime-kun here?"

Shinpachi put a hand where his heart was. "Ouch, Sakura-chan. Ouch! Hajime is giving his report to Hijikata. They should be done in a couple of hours."

Sakura nodded, smiling brightly. Then, her smile slipped. "Shin-kun…Where's…Where's Harada? Why isn't he with you?"

Nagakura's countenance immediately changed, and his shoulders slumped. He looked crestfallen, as if the weight of the world rested on his shoulders.

Sakura's heart sank.

TBC

I know what you're going to say: "What the hell are you doing, woman?! Two chapters in two days? Don't you have a life?"

Why, I do! His name is Maximus and he is a damn cute Siberian Husky!

Jokes aside though, since we're in lockdown and social distancing, I had a bit of free time and what can I say…I can't stay away from this story. After all, if I can give you a new chapter, why not do it?

Having said that, can we talk about how adorable Sakura and Souji's relationship is? She's like "you're the annoying little brother I always wanted and you're so cute I want to cuddle you all day and if anyone lays a finger on you, they are dead." And he's like "I own this weirdo. She gets on my nerves but she's cool and I happen to like her a lot, so if you dare harm a hair on her head, I will end you."

And I'm LIVING for it!

Rest assured that there are many SoujiXSakura scenes to come.

Alright! Not much to say this time around.

I have a few things planned so I won't take long to post the next chapter too so…stay tuned!

If you enjoyed this chapter, drop me a review to let me know what you think. Reading your thoughts always makes my day.

Until next time,

Lots of love!