Going to make this brief because it is almost two in the morning where I am and I'm exhausted. I've decided that I'm going to update every two weeks, so Sunday the seventeenth will be the next update. And if you haven't seen my new posting, there's a story titled 'Unfinished Stories,' and it's filled with tons of my stories that I've started but am not finishing. They are up for adoption if anyone is interested. Go check them out.

Chapter Seventeen – Advice

"I just don't know how to tell him," I said, "I know I have to tell him, but, it's humiliating. I'm scared that if I tell him, he'll be disgusted with me and want me to move out."

"It's understandable to be afraid to tell Edward, but, I'm glad you know that it's important to tell him. And, I don't think there'd be anything to fear, it's not like you're still sick with the STD."

"But, it just brings back those old memories." I shuddered.

"A lot of things will bring back old memories, that's normal," Emily said, "But, Edward cares deeply about you. If you're honest with him, he's not going to dislike you. And if he does, then isn't it better you know now, rather than later on in the future."

"I guess so. I just don't know how to tell him."

"Remember the exercises I taught you? This is just like one of those times. Prepare exactly what you're going to say, be prepared for questions, and take deep breaths. Any time you've told him anything, these exercises have always worked right?"

"They have."

"Now, may I ask you something? It's a little personal and I understand if you don't want an answer, but, have you and Edward talked about sex?"

"Yes, that's why he asked about this," I said, "Why would you want to know about that?"

"Well, what I mean is are you prepared for it?"

"Yes…"

"You're absolutely positive? I know it was your decision to have sex, but, I just want you to be prepared for it. Sometimes sex can conjure up hard memories."

I nodded, "I know, I've thought it over and over. And I've done everything to prepare for it."

"Good, you still have my number though, right?" She asked.

"Yep, I still have it," I looked down at my watch, "My shift starts soon, I need to get going."

"Okay, this was a good session. Call me anytime," she said as she walked me to the door, "I'll see you in two weeks."

"See you," I said as I waved bye.

I took the bus to the restaurant. Edward would have driven me, but, he was in a meeting with other investors and he had texted me to tell me he was running late. I didn't mind though, he wasn't my personal driver.

I arrived twenty minutes before my shift started, so, I had some down time to just sit and reflect on what Elizabeth and I discussed.

She always told me that after each session, I should reflect on what we said. She says that's the best time to really absorb her words and advice. Plus, in the moment sometimes it's hard to really determine whether the session was helpful or not. She asked this because she wanted to make sure she was doing the best should could to help her patients.

I always thought Elizabeth was good at helping me. I felt comfortable to tell her anything, and that was something rare for me. I was never truly comfortable enough with anyone to tell them about the abuse I suffered through.

I was now able to bring myself to call it what it was. Abuse. Emily helped me to that point.

"Bella, could you start a few minutes early? Lauren is running late."

"Sure, Billy."

I grabbed my apron and wrapped it around my waist. It was Saturday night, so, it was a pretty busy night. I always made great tips on these nights. At the end of the night, while I was waiting on Edward to pick me up I counted the tips. I had made a surprising six hundred and fifty-seven dollars.

I was beyond happy with that amount. Four hundred of it would go to my savings account. So far, I had over three thousand in it. I was saving up to buy a used car. That way I wouldn't have to take the bus anymore or rely on Edward to drive me around.

One hundred and fifty would go to Edward, towards the apartment. It was all he'd let me pay towards it. I wanted to pay more, but, he outright refused. He insisted I paid nothing, he had the bills covered. But, I felt like a bum if I didn't pay my part.

Edward finally pulled up, I happily hopped into his car.

"Bella, you shouldn't be waiting outside of the restaurant. I'm scared someone will hurt you." He said when I strapped in.

"I'm a big girl, I'll be fine," I said, dismissing his worries, "And I want to talk to you when we get home. I want to talk about the thing."

He nodded, knowing exactly what I was talking about. We had been calling this discussion the thing since it had been brought up.

"Just when we talk about it, I don't want you to interrupt me when I tell you. I need to get through it. And you can ask questions but please nothing to hard, okay?"

"Absolutely," he said as he grabbed my hand, "I'm so happy you're telling me."

I smiled, "I'm sorry it's taken me a couple days to tell you. It's just hard."

"I understand, darling. And again, I'm so happy you're telling me."

As we got closer to the apartment, my stomach twisted in knots. I had to tell him tonight. I was going to tell him tonight. I needed to tell him tonight.

"Where do you want to talk? Bedroom, living room?"

"Bathroom's not an option?" I chuckled.

He chuckled, "If you want to talk there, I'm game."

"Let's talk in the bedroom."

He followed me back to the room. We took our shoes off and changed into pajamas before sitting on the bed.

I sat back on my knees in front of him, staring down at my hands. I took a few deep breaths before opening my mouth.

"Okay, so, the other night you asked me if I had gotten any STD's. And the answer is yes. I had three STD's when I wasn't under the contract anymore—," I had to take a few deep breaths before I continued, "Uh, I'll tell you how I found out. Just give me a minute."

"It's okay hon, take your time. I'm not in a rush."

I nodded, closing my eyes and trying hard to collect myself as best as I could. Edward sat quietly in front of me, not rushing or doing anything to interrupt my calming process.

After a few moments I finally started to tell another piece of my past.

"Well, when I was finally out of that place I as living on the streets. I slept wherever I could and ate at the homeless shelters whenever they were serving meals. I started to notice that something was wrong with me. I felt sick and dizzy and weak all the time. It started to get worse as more time passed. One night, when I was in a homeless shelter, I blacked out. Someone called an ambulance and when I woke up I was in a hospital room. I had no idea what had happened. The doctor told me that I had contracted three STD's. I had Chlamydia, Trichomoniasis, and Gonorrhea. They put me on a lot of antibiotics and I was cleared of all of it. I don't like talking about it because it's embarrassing, and it just reminds me of when I was there."

He pulled me into a gentle hug, "I'm so glad you told me. I was so worried about you. I thought you had AIDS or HIV. It scared me so bad."

"I'm sorry I worried you."

He kissed my head, "I was scared about losing you. You mean so much to me."

I smiled against his collar bone, "I thought you'd be disgusted with me."

"Never. It's not your fault what they did to you or left you with. I'd never be disgusted with you."

"Thank you," I whispered.

"So, the other night," he said, "you said you were ready for sex?"

I smiled, "I did."

"I'm wondering, are you still ready?"

I let my hand drift from his chest to his groin, "I still am."

He laid back, pulling me on top of him. We started kissing, tongues tangling, lip biting and hair tugging. I felt myself becoming wet, I started to rub my pelvis against his erection.

"Can I take your shirt off?" He asked, tugging at the bottom of my shirt.

I nodded and started kissing his neck, biting his neck. Once my shirt was off, he started playing with my bra, pulling the straps over my arms and gently scratching my back with his nails, rubbing over my bra.

Finally, he unhooked it. I leaned up, so he could have better access to my breasts. My head rolled back, as he twisted and tugged my nipples until the hardened under her fingers. He sat up, sucking one of my breasts into his mouth.

His teeth teased the hard peak until I was gasping, begging for more. I felt his fingers find their way into my pants. My hips thrust upwards, my center desperately seeking his fingers.

He rolled us over, after finding the position awkward. He kissed down my neck, over my collarbone, over my chest and down the path of my stomach. I bit my lip, trying to contain my moans as he made his way to my center.

He pulled my pants down my legs, tossing them aside. Once they were out of the way, his teeth grabbed my panties and pulled. The act making me even more wetter.

His hands gently pushed my thighs apart as he started licking my sopping pussy. His skilled tongue always driving me crazy, pushing me to the edge but keeping me from falling until he wanted me to fall.

After a few moments of eager licking, he leaned over me and pulled a condom out of his nightstand. He stripped out of his clothes, his hard cock bouncing from the restraint of his pants.

I watched as he tore the condom open with his teeth then rolled it over the head of his penis. Once the condom was securely in place, he leaned down and started kissing me, then whispered in my ear.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes," I whispered, licking the shell of his ear. He shuddered, then grabbed the base of his cock and rubbed the tip against my opening.

I bit my lip, excited to feel him inside of me. Finally, he pushed his cock inside of me.

We both gasped; he gripped the sheets while my nail dug into his back. He felt amazing. It had never felt so good before.

His forehead dropped against mine, "God damn Bella, you feel fucking great."

A spark of excitement rushed through me, "I love when you talk dirty." I moaned.

"Oh really?" He said, his eyebrow raising, "Your pussy feels fucking amazing," he whispered in my ear, pulling back then thrusting back in, "Your so fucking tight. You love it don't you, does my cock feel good in your tight pussy? I know you love it. Your pussy keeps squeezing me—,"

"Ungh, please," I moaned, throwing my head back.

"Tell me Bella, what do you love? Tell me,"

"Please!" I moaned louder, a knot in my stomach so large that I felt as if I were going to burst at any moment.

"Tell me Bella, tell me, you know what I want to hear, tell me. Tell me and I'll let you cum. You know you want to say it."

"I love your huge cock in my tight pussy! It feels fucking amazing! Please don't ever stop! Oh god—! I'm—I'm cummi—ugh!" I came hard, my pussy squeezing around him.

He gasped, "Oh, fuck, I'm cumming," he groaned, the words strained as his cock twitched inside of me.

He thrusted a few sporadic times before falling on top of me. We were both breathing heavily, though, it was harder for me to breathe because he was laying on me.

"I think you need to roll over, big guy," I panted.

"Huh?—Oh, sorry," he said as he rolled over then pulled me into his chest.

"That was amazing."

"Fucking amazing," he smiled, "I was surprised you liked the dirty talk."

I bit my lip and nodded, falling silent.

"What's wrong," he asked as he lifted my chin to look at him.

"I don't want to talk about it right now. I just want to enjoy this right now."

"Yeah, me too." He said as he kissed the top of my head.

I smiled and closed my eyes, falling asleep while the afterglow of sex and his warmth surrounded me. I couldn't imagine a more perfect feeling.