Mess Call (Tales from the Crypt #41, April/May 1954)
Ahhh! It is warm and dry here. It is good to feel warm and dry. I am so tired, so very tired. And my eyes are heavy with sleep. I close them. I sleep...
OBERLEUTNANT: "Come, Corporal! Wake up! On your feet! I have for you an important assignment! Come at once!
I am going out there again. I do not like it out there. It is wet and cold out there. Here it is warm and dry.
OBERLEUTNANT: "You will proceed to Area 14 N.W. You will date your report November 21, 1917 and the exact hour. That is important!"
HANS: "Yes, Oberleutnant."
I am crawling on my belly through the mud. It is cold and damp and I shiver and my teeth chatter. I grip my Mauser tighter. I am approaching Area 41 N.W. I must be quiet. They are there. The enemy. They are just over that hill ahead. I will hide in this shell-hole. I must be quiet. November 21, 1917, 10:40 P.M., Enemy Position: 115 yds. West of...I stop writing my report. I listen. Someone is here. Here in this shell-hole. With me! He comes at me! An enemy soldier! I swing my Mauser around, sending my bayonet into his soft belly, plunging it upward, feeling the crunching bone, hearing the sucking sounds. I am frightened. His arms swing outward. I pull my bayonet and thrust again. Stabbing, slashing, cutting him to ribbons. I see his face, his eyes and the blood pouring and I am sick.
He...he is dead! And now my oberleutnant is calling me...calling me back. Everything is fading. No! It is not my oberleutnant calling me. It is the doctor's voice. I am back where it is warm and dry. The doctor is talking to that man about me.
DOCTOR: "So you have seen for yourself, Herr Heinrich. It is always the same violent nightmare! He dreams vividly, each night of that experience in the trenches. It haunts him. However, he is perfectly strong and healthy in every other respect. So you need not have any fears."
I was asleep, but I am awake now. It is morning and the doctor is talking to Herr Heinrich.
DOCTOR: "...and so I have arranged everything. You may take him today. I need not tell you how grateful we are!"
HEINRICH: "Ach! I am glad to do this for him, Herr Doctor."
DOCTOR: "Hans, I have news! You are leaving here today, my boy. Herr Heinrich is taking you to his home to live. You will help out in his shop, of course, but the work will be light and the hours short! What do you think of this, Hans?"
HANS: "This is very good of you, Herr Heinrich."
HEINRICH: "Ach! It is nothing, Hans."
We are riding in a carriage. It is good to be out of the hospital. Herr Heinrich is a kind man.
HEINRICH: "Yes, meat is very scarce, Hans. But I have saved carefully and sell only to my own customers and friends. But enough of business. Look! There is my house. Your new home."
Herr Heinrich's house is big. It is very nice to live in a big house.
HEINRICH: "Well, Hans, how do you like it? Do you think you will be comfortable?"
HANS: "Oh, yes, Herr Heinrich! It is a fine house."
This food is good. I like especially the pickled meats and the wine.
HEINRICH: "To your good health, Hans. Here! More wine, my boy. It is good for you."
HANS: "It is wonderful wine and delicious food, too!"
My room, it has nice things. The bed is very soft and I am tired.
HEINRICH: "Sleep well, Hans. And remember. Tomorrow, we go to my butcher shop. Good night."
HANS: "Good night, Herr Heinrich. I will work hard for you."
Ahhh! It is warm here, warm and dry. I lie on my new soft bed and I doze...
OBERLEUTNANT: Come, Corporal! Wake up! On your feet!"
I am stabbing, slashing, cutting him to ribbons. I see the blood pouring and I am sick! He is dead. And now my oberleutnant is calling...calling me back. No! It is not my oberleutnant. It is...
HEINRICH: "Hans! Come! Wake up! It is a fine morning and we have a fine breakfast waiting."
HANS: "Huh? Oh, Herr Heinrich."
The air is cool, but I am warm. We are walking to Herr Heinrich's shop. I feel good.
HEINRICH: "We are soon there, Hans. Only until the end of this narrow street."
HANS: "But I see no shop, Herr Heinrich."
HEINRICH: "Ach! Of course you don't see it, Hans. I am exclusive. If I were to have a big open store, all Germany would come to me for meat and pfoof! In one day, they would clean me out. Understand? Ah! Here we are."
HANS: "Yes, Herr Heinrich! I understand."
There is much meat in Herr Heinrich's shop and many people come to buy.
HEINRICH: "There you go, Herr Ludmeyer. 2 pounds, correct? How about some schnapps at my house tonight? We can talk about the meat shortage. Ha, ha!"
LUDMEYER: "Ach! Not only do you sell me meat, but you invite me to your house? Yes, I would enjoy that, Herr Heinrich."
Herr Ludmeyer has come. We are drinking and eating good pickled meats. And I grow tired.
LUDMEYER: "This meat! It is wonderful? But you? You don't eat any, Herr Heinrich?"
HEINRICH: "Ach! When you are a butcher, you eat too much meat! Ha, ha! But come, Herr Ludmeyer, I must show you my wine cellar!"
HANS: "I will go to bed now. Good night."
I go to my room and undress and lie on my soft bed. Soft and warm and dry.
OBERLEUTNANT: Come, Corporal! Wake up! On your feet!"
He comes at me and I swing around, sending my bayonet into his soft belly, cutting, stabbing, slashing him to ribbons. The blood pouring...pouring...I am sweeping the shop. I do this every morning. And I help Herr Heinrich lift the heavy things. I am strong.
HEINRICH: "Hans! Come give me a hand, like a good fellow."
HANS: "Yes, Herr Heinrich."
HEINRiCH: "There! That is good. Ha, ha! No one in Germany has as much meat as I! Ah, another customer is here!"
Herr Heinrich is friendly. He is again inviting someone to his house.
HEINRICH: "Yes, Gustav. We need relaxation. You...you can your wife. Come to my house tonight. We will have schnapps. What do you say?"
GUSTAV: "Fine, Heinrich, fine! I bring my wife! Tell me, where do you live?"
Again, I am drinking and eating with Herr Heinrich's friends. Many times I do this. Tonight, I don't feel good. Drinking too much.
HEINRICH: "Oh, Frau Shotz. You have tasted nothing until you have tried the imported wines in my wine cellar. Come, Gustav, Frau Shotz. I will show you!"
FRAU SHOTZ: "You are a generous host, Herr Heinrich!"
HANS: "I...I am very sleepy. I will go to bed, now. Good night."
I am in my room. It is dark here! I am dizzy! Everything is spinning and I am falling...falling...M-my head! It hurts! It...it is warm and dry here. It is good to feel warm and dry. I am so tired. And...
OBERLEUTNANT/HEINRICH: Come, Corporal! Wake up! On your feet! I have for you an important assignment!"
HEINRICH: "Hurry, Corporal! There is much to do tonight. Come! Come!"
HANS: "Yes, Oberleutnant."
It is cold and damp and I shiver and my teeth chatter.
HEIRNICH: "This way, Corporal! This way! But be careful. The enemy is just over that hill."
I must be quiet. I will hide in the shell-hole and make out my report.
HANS: "November 21, 1917. 10:40 P.M. Enemy Position: 115 yards. West of..."
HEINRICH: "Listen, Hans, listen! Take this! Your Mauser."
Someone is in this shell-hole with me. I turn, gripping my Mauser.
HEINRICH: "There he is, Hans! Get him! Get him!"
An enemy soldier. I swing around, sending my bayonet into his soft belly, feeling the crunching bone, hearing the sucking sound.
HEINRICH: "Good, Hans! Now go to work."
I pull out my bayonet and trust again, stabbing, slashing, cutting him to ribbons.
HEINRICH: "Careful, Hans! Careful!"
I see his face, his eyes and the blood pouring...pouring and I am sick.
HEINRICH: "Hans! Why do you stop? Finish! Finish your work!"
My head hurts where I stunk it and my dream vanishes and I am standing in a dark, damp cellar before a...a...
HANS: "Oh, lord! A butcher's chopping block!"
HEINRICH: "Go on, Hans! Finish!"
HANS: *choke* There...there is a body on the block! It is...Herr Shotz! And this is no bayonet! This is a cleaver in my hand!"
HEINRICH: "Corporal! I order you! Finish your assignment!"
HANS: "I...I...have done a horrible, terrible thing! But...but how many other times have I done this? How many other times has he...he...? Ooooh, my head! My memory! It's coming back!"
HEINRICH: "Hans! Go! Go upstairs!"
HANS: "I remember now! Yes, yes! I was a butcher! A good butcher! Then, a soldier! I was a soldier and I killed a man in a shell-hole! There was an explosion! Every night I dreamed of that killing! Y-you! You made me do this fiendish work while I dreamed! Yes! Yes! You found out I was a butcher! Like no other shop in all of Germany, your's is full of meat! All of the visitors you have brought down here! Yes, of course! Your exclusive shop is filled with HUMAN MEAT!"
HEINRICH: "No! NO!"
He comes at me and everything goes black. It is suddenly cold and damp and he is the enemy soldier and I am sending my bayonet into his soft belly, crunching the bone, hearing the sucking sounds, stabbing, slashing, cutting him to ribbons. His face, his eyes, the blood pouring...pouring...
OFFICER #1: "Good lord!"
OFFICER #2: *choke*