4-16-20
In Another Life
S2,Ep7- The Witchfinder
Merlin understood perfectly what Gaius was telling him, but accepting it was another matter. "I must let you go?" he asked.
Gaius gave a solemn nod. "To do otherwise would be an act of suicide."
Frustration, fear and the stress of these last few days made Merlin's eyes prick with tears.
His mentor touched his shoulder fondly. "You must go now, Merlin. And remember all I've taught you."
It was through a haze that Merlin recognized the sound of heavy footsteps from the guards. He turned back to find Arthur watching their approach. The prince gave him a slight nod before lowering his gaze respectfully.
He would be in trouble if they were found, and Uther's wrath was greatest where sorcery was concerned.
You can trust him.
Merlin didn't recognize the voice in his head, so abrupt was the thought. But it was his, for he knew it in his heart to be true.
"Go," Gaius repeated. Merlin hugged him quickly, not speaking a word of his plan, for there was no time to argue.
Merlin walked out and waited a few paces away as Arthur locked the cell, his ears buzzing with anticipation. When Arthur began to walk past him, he struggled to speak.
"Come with me," Arthur ordered, cutting off his attempt and leaving no room for discussion. Merlin obeyed, following his master through the castle and agonizing over the rash decision he had yet to commit to. He'd seen Arthur show mercy to druids, and to others his father would call criminals. Would he be as gracious to someone he'd called a friend who blatantly broke the king's laws?
He only realized how far they'd walked when Arthur closed the door to his chambers behind them. "I don't want you trying something that will get you killed," he stated. "It's best if you stay here for now."
You know you can trust him.
Merlin looked around the room where he'd bantered with Arthur so many times, the bed he'd wrestled the prince out of when he was being stubborn in the morning, the table he'd served him rat stew at, the fireplace where he'd once said goodbye to the man for what he thought was the last time. A sob ripped through him, and he jumped when Arthur laid a hand on his shoulder, so gentle it was as if he feared to break him.
The prince's eyes faltered under his own gaze. "I'm sorry, Merlin. I know what he means to you."
Merlin shook his head. "Th- there-" he stuttered. "There's something y- you don't know."
Arthur frowned. "This isn't your fault, Merlin," he insisted.
"It's all my fault!" Merlin cried, choking on the words.
"No," Arthur repeated. "You didn't cause any of this."
Merlin squeezed his eyes shut, swiping futilely at his tears. "You don't understand."
"No," Arthur conceded. "...I can't understand what this must be like for you."
"No, listen to me," Merlin said desperately. "Gaius is not the sorcerer."
Arthur nodded. "I understand that this must be hard to accept-"
"No, Gaius is not the man Aredian is looking for!"
The prince's brow furrowed, but as ever, the truth eluded him. "You can't be certain."
"I can," Merlin whispered. His mouth formed around the words a few times before he found his voice again. "Because it's me."
Arthur's eyes cleared for a moment, but doubt rapidly took over once more. "No, you've pulled this before- with Guinevere-"
"That was to the king, Arthur, not to you."
Arthur pinched the bridge of his nose. "Why are you saying this?"
"Because Gaius is about to die in my place, and I can't allow that."
"You're not a sorcerer, Merlin," Arthur insisted. "How on earth could an idiot like you keep that secret for this long?"
"...Because you never wanted to see it," Merlin admitted, but Arthur shook his head.
"This is nonsense. You're grieving, Merlin, that's all this is."
"This is that coat you keep telling me to mend, yeah?"
Arthur glanced down at his cuff, where the stitching had come undone. Merlin took his arm, holding it so that he could see the tear.
He hesitated until Arthur began to pull away, and uttered a repairing spell. Arthur's eyes grew wide, staring at Merlin's own flashing gold rather than the stitches that Merlin had fixed. He drew back, his hand falling to the hilt of his sword as anger and disgust overtook him.
Merlin's tears started fresh, but for once he faced Arthur with no lie between them.
"...How could you lie to me like this?" Arthur demanded breathlessly.
"I had to," Merlin whispered.
"My father gave you work here. Welcomed you into the castle staff and you've used magic under our very noses."
"Magic is only as evil as the sorcerer who uses it," Merlin said. "And I've used it for you, Arthur- to protect you, to serve you."
Arthur scoffed, but his hand fell away from his sword.
"Your father believes that magic is a source of evil, but that's not true, Arthur. You know that's not true."
"How dare you claim to know what I believe!" Arthur shouted. "How can I trust a man who's lied to me?"
"Because I'm your friend!"
Arthur shook his head, his father's anger visible in his own face. "I don't know what you are anymore."
Merlin's heart dropped, but still he tried. "If I sought the downfall of Camelot, I could have brought it on long ago, or simply sat by and allowed someone else to."
"And why haven't you? We're enemies, Merlin. You must've known that all along."
Merlin's fear softened to understanding. "Because I believe in the kingdom you'll create. A fair and just kingdom that your father wouldn't know how to."
The prince's anger was beginning to fade, giving way to sorrow. "I'm the king's son. You know I have to turn you in. Why would you tell me this, Merlin?"
Despite Arthur's words, Merlin felt as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. "Because you deserve to know."
Arthur huffed a sigh, turned to face the window. "...Go home, Merlin."
"...Arthur... if you do turn me in... I'll understand. But the amulet Aredian found- that wasn't Gaius', or mine. Aredian planted it there. If we can prove that-"
"I said go home!" Arthur repeated.
Merlin held back the question that burned in his mind, instead doing as his master commanded. He was surprised to find himself too numb to cry anymore.
Merlin had cleared the shattered glass from Gaius' chambers and sorted the papers as best he could, but the room felt empty and wrong in the physician's absence. He found himself staring out the window, desperately combing through his memories of the time since Aredian's arrival for some mistake he might have made that would lead Merlin to the answers he sought.
He started when the door opened, expecting a pair of guards to follow Arthur into the room to make his arrest.
But there was only Arthur. He didn't look angry anymore, only tired.
The prince looked around for a moment, closed the door, then took a seat at the table. "Come here."
Merlin sat across from him, not knowing what to expect. Arthur's eyes were red, but his expression gave nothing away.
"...You said Aredian planted the amulet. Are you sure?"
Merlin nodded quickly.
"You think he did something to cause those women to lie?"
"Either that or he caused them to hallucinate somehow."
Arthur nodded. "Then we must find out how he did it."
Merlin's eyes widened. Noticing this, Arthur sighed.
"You could've run."
"I wouldn't leave Gaius to be killed."
"I know. Because that's the kind of person you are. Listen, Merlin- I don't approve of what you've done, but we've no time to argue it now. If my father ever catches you, you know what he'll do."
Merlin tilted his head. "Does that mean…?"
"I won't turn you in when I can't see any harm you've done anyone."
Merlin took a deep breath in relief. "Even though I'm a sorcerer?"
Arthur's face was set. "I know that I can trust you."
When Merlin's eyes began to water once more, Arthur tapped his arm with a hint of a smile.
"C'mon. Save your blubbering for later. For now, tell me how I can help."