Hearing Christine's conversation with Meg had been a harsh reality check for Erik. He was grateful that she didn't plan on pressuring him to show her his face. But he knew she wanted him too.

He also knew he was falling more and more in love with her every day.

That had never been a problem before. The women in his life were not the types to stick around. They had stopped by for the night every few weeks or months, and in the morning they were on their way. Eventually, they wanted to know about the mask. And that would be the end of it.

But Christine was different. He wanted her to stick around, even if it meant revealing himself. The voices in his head whispered that once he did, she would be gone. In his mind, only two roads lay before him, both ending without Christine.

He could put off showing her. Nurse her patience for every second it was worth until she grew frustrated- and she would grow frustrated- and left. Or he could face the inevitable head on, expose himself now, and get it over with.

Eventually he decided to save himself a bit of heartache, and face it sooner rather than later. The longer he waited, the more he would love her, and the worse it would hurt when she left. Besides, she planned to tell her father soon. He would hate to put her through all that trouble for nothing.

When Christine accepted his invitation to have dinner at his place, he almost felt guilty. She had no idea the horrors that awaited her.

Christine noticed his more-than-usual gloomy countenance as they were walking through the lobby one morning. Their dinner was tonight, so she had thought he'd be happy.

"Are you ok?" She resisted the urge to take his hand.

"Hm? Oh. Yes I'm fine."

"You're lying to me."

Erik mustered a smile in her direction. "I'm just distracted. Thinking about what I'm going to make for you tonight."

She didn't fully believe him, but decided to let it be.

They were near the door when a familiar voice came up behind them.

"Hey, wait up." They both turned to see Nadir jogging to catch them. He was grinning. "Surprise, you get some extra company today!"

Erik frowned. "What? Why?"

"Well don't look so enthused. I need to run some errands for Gustave. I ran over a nail this morning, so he said I could catch a ride with you while my car is in the shop." He turned to Christine, purposefully ignoring Erik. "If that's ok with you, boss?"

Christine ignored Erik's withering glance and smiled. "Of course Nadir. Some different company will do us good. I was starting to think the three of us have been spending too much time together."

Erik scowled at nothing in particular when he took his old place in the front seat. Nadir hopped in the back happily. James assessed the situation with one look and donned his usual smirk. Had it not been for their profuse apology and Christine actually honoring her promise of a raise, he would have been tempted to stir trouble for them. Instead he slipped into his usual quiet reverie.

They hadn't been on the road for two minutes when Nadir opened his mouth.

"So Christine. Has our Erik told you the big news?"

Erik whipped around to scowl at him. Christine turned to Nadir, eyes wide with interest, chin in her hand. "Why no, what big news?"

"He managed to get himself a girlfriend."

James choked on his laughter and barely managed to disguise it as a cough.

"Nadir!" Erik snapped. "Shut up."

"Well that's lovely, congratulations Erik!" Christine's sudden acting skills were remarkable.

"Except," Nadir continued, pausing for dramatic effect, "She's a secret. He won't tell me a thing about her. I only found out she existed by accident."

"Oooohhh, well that is interesting."

James face was scarlet and his lips were drawn into a thin line. Christine leaned forward on the console. "Come on Erik at least tell us her name."

He turned to her slowly, eyes narrowed. "Pain in the neck."

Nadir gave a sharp laugh. "She sounds delightful!"

"Yes, delightful." Christine moved her body into Nadir's line of sight and pinched Erik's bicep. He jerked slightly and leaned out of reach.

"Are you seriously not going to tell us a thing about her?" Nadir pressed.

Christine returned to her seat with a smug look. "Maybe he's embarrassed."

"Are you embarrassed of her Erik?" This time Nadir leaned forward, eagerly picking up Christine's pestering tone. "Were you lying when you said she was hot? Or is she just crazy? Scratch that I already know she's crazy for dating you."

Ignoring the unintentional insult, Christine chimed in. "Oh he said she was hot, did he?" She caught his glance in the rearview.

"Yup, that's all I was able to get out of him."

"Well let's elaborate on that shall we?" She held Erik's stare in the mirror, a teasing challenge. "What's hot about her Erik?"

He huffed, looked away, then back at her. "Seriously?"

"Seriously." Christine and Nadir answered in unison.

"Fine. She's beautiful."

"Boooo!" Nadir gave him a thumbs down. "Boring! Be specific."

Erik's lip curled. "She has…nice eyes."

"Ok what else?"

"She's kind. And funny."

Christine slowly began to smile.

"That's nice but you're basically describing half the girls on the planet," Nadir argued. "What's so great about her?"

Erik paused for a moment, gathering his thoughts. He looked out the window. Then back to the mirror, right at Christine. "She's wonderful. The most wonderful person I've ever met. She…she makes me happy."

"Now that is saying something," Nadir said, genuinely impressed. Oblivious to Christine's melting expression. "You're the most miserable person in the world."

"Thanks."

"Well it's true."

Erik rolled his eyes. "Let's talk about something else."

"Not interested thank you. So you said she's hot but how hot? Give me like, on a scale of one to ten."

This time it was Christine who intervened. "Oh come now Nadir, you can't seriously expect-"

"Solid ten for sure," Erik chimed in.

Nadir gave a pleased laugh while Christine threw Erik a slight glare. "Rating women is a bit objectifying, wouldn't you say? Certainly nothing your girlfriend deserves, Erik."

The slightest bit of remorse touched his smirk. "Right. Sorry."

"Well I'm not the one you need to apologize to."

Nadir laughed again. "Yes Erik be sure to tell her you objectified her, then apologize for it."

He attempted a chuckle while pulling out his phone. Thankfully Nadir finally distracted himself by asking James about the women in his life. Erik sent Christine a text.

I'm sorry, really. Are you mad?

Her phone dinged. James glanced up once as she pulled it out and put it on silent. Nadir continued to question him.

No
Well ok I was for a second, but what you said before made up for it

I meant every word. And I really am sorry love

If you're worried about it, just make it up to me tonight 😉

Erik swallowed. He hated his treacherous mind for snatching her words and taking them to a place she had certainly not intended.

Of course love.

You really need to learn to use emojis 😘

That evening Christine was face-timing Meg as she stood at her bathroom mirror, getting ready for their special dinner. Her friend had pressed her with non stop questions the moment their call began.

"Do you know what he's making you?"

"No, it's a surprise."

"Did you tell him you're allergic to nuts?"

"Yes, he knows. He doesn't like nuts anyway."

"Awww that's so cute you know each other so well already."

Christine laughed. "That's pretty basic information Meg."

"I know but still. Do you know his middle name?"

"He doesn't have one."

"Weird. Does he know yours?"

"Yes."

"How tall is he?"

"6'2."

"Nice. Is he a good kisser?"

Christine scoffed but smiled. "Yes. I think he was a little rusty at first but he's getting better."

"Awww. Does he hold doors for you?"

"Yes."

"Do you have your over night bag packed?"

"Yes-" Christine stopped short, mouth dropping as she turned to her phone in shock.

Meg gave an ear piercing, high pitched scream. "I KNEW IT I KNEW I KNEW IT I KNEW IT!"

Christine could only cover her reddening face with her hands.

"AHHHH I KNEW IT! YOU DIDN'T TELL YOUR DAD ALREADY DID YOU?"

She sighed and slowly met Meg's eye. "Nooo…"

"So you changed your mind?"

"I don't know…maybe…I mean, it's none of his business anyway and…I don't know, I don't know!" She tossed down her lipstick with a huff. "Maybe it'll be nothing, I don't know. But I just thought if things feel right then…doesn't hurt to be prepared?"

Meg screamed again and buried her face in a pillow. "Yes! I told you from the start it was a stupid plan. Be with him or don't be with him, but don't dictate your relationship around your dad!"

Christine looked down at her hands. "Well…it's not like that exactly…"

The little blond waived a dismissive hand. "Whatever, it's still getting in the way." She suddenly grew a little serious and scooted closer to the camera. "I'm excited for you, just make sure he respects you, got it?"

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "I know Meg. He does."

"Are you sure? Didn't you just tell me he rated you for his friend today?"

"Well yeah but-"

"But what?"

This time she did roll her eyes. "Will you make up your mind? One second you're all excited and now what, are you trying to talk me out of it?"

"No, I'm just making sure you know what you're doing. And if it sounds like you don't, then I'll try to talk you out of it."

Christine crossed her arms. "I don't think he understood it was disrespectful until I told him. And then he apologized right away."

Meg's eyes were narrowed, but she slowly nodded. "Well…alright. I guess that seems ok."

Another eye roll, followed by a patient laugh. "Well thank you for your permission."

"You're very welcome," Meg answer without skipping a beat. "Tis my sworn best friend duty."

When Erik heard his door open, followed by Christine calling his name, he felt utterly delighted. Both because she was here, and that she had walked in without knocking. She felt comfortable.

"Hello love," He called, drying his hands off on a towel. He wondered if the little endearment he had picked up revealed the feeling he hadn't yet expressed outright. Though even if it did, he had no intention of stopping.

Erik walked out of the kitchen, towel still in hand. "Do you mind to put the chain on the door? We don't need another Nadir inci…" he looked up, face dropping as his eyes settled on Christine. "…dent."

She had thought it was intended to be a nice dinner. Sort of a dress up more than usual type thing. And given the pristine state of Erik's apartment, and the suit pants and dress shirt he wore, she knew she had been correct. But the way he was looking at her made her worry she had gone overboard.

"Sorry, too much?" She giggled nervously and looked down at the little black dress she wore. It stopped just above her knee, with a steep neckline that she pretended played no part in her selection. She had straightened her hair for the first time in years, and her black heels complimented the ensemble perfectly before she slipped them off.

"Too much?" His voice was husky. Christine looked up to find him approaching slowly, eyes devouring her. He didn't seem to notice when he dropped the towel on the floor. "You look…" His head shook slightly, as if in disbelief. "God, you look…"

Christine laughed and closed the space between them to nudge his chest. "Stop it!"

"I can't help it," he argued softly. His gaze still roved her body hungrily, lingering at her chest for a moment, which made Christine smirk. Finally he found her face. "Can I kiss you?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

She half expected something heavy and passionate, akin to his intense stare. Instead she was surprised when his finger gently tilted her chin up, lips meeting hers with delicate touch. He moved softly, as though he might break her.

Erik was not very good at hiding his feelings, and that was mostly thanks to his eyes. No matter how much he tried to cover his emotions in stiff body language and frowns, his eyes betrayed him. Christine had noticed this soon after she met him, after spending more time looking into her bodyguard's eyes than a boss should have. She had seen longing there. And hurt. Lately, an abundance of lust.

And now when he pulled away she saw adoration. Her heart gave a gentle squeeze.

"You're beautiful. To say the least."

"You're handsome."

Erik said nothing but the sudden discomfort on his face was clear. He looked at the ground, features drawn in a subtle grimace. Christine chastised herself. As much as she believed her own words, Erik had never been eager to discuss his appearance. She changed the subject. "So what's on the menu for tonight monsieur?"

He immediately perked up. "Well, you know how you like Italian?"

"Yes."

"And you like fries?"

She paused, eyebrow raised. "…yes?"

"It's neither of those things."

She rolled her eyes with a laugh. "No French fry parmesan? I was excited."

"Nope." He took her hand and kissed it. "I have for you darling, my version of coq au vin, and some palmiers." He began leading her to the kitchen.

"Um, what?" Christine laughed. "What is that?"

Erik chuckled. "Sort of like a chicken stew. Cookies for dessert."

"Ah. Is it French?" She took a seat at the table and accepted the glass of wine he offered.

"It is."

She tilted her head, interested piqued. "Do you speak French?"

He smiled brightly as he poured his own glass. "Oui, mon amour."

Christine's face lit up, delighted. "Why did you never tell me?"

He shrugged. "Never came up I suppose."

She leaned her elbows on the table and cupped her chin in her hands. "Say something else."

Erik turned to the stove with a half smile. "What would you like me to say?" He turned off the heat and reached into the cabinet for bowls. Before Christine, he had only two mismatched ones that he had borrowed from Nadir and then kept. Yesterday he had purchased the first matching dinnerware he'd ever owned.

"Hmm…I don't know, say whatever you'd like."

He pondered for a moment, retrieving silverware. Then spoke to her as he set the table. "Je t'aime tellement. Tue es le monde pour moi." He straightened the silverware, then paused, slender fingers poised at the edge of the table. His eyes stared at them blankly. "Je ferai n'importe quoi pour toi…" He looked at her.

Christine was smiling. The knowing glint in her eye concerned him. Almost as if she understood. "Sounds romantic."

He decided to hope for the best. "Well, French is known for that."

She reached over and took his hand, kissing it gently. "You think you can say more for me later?" She kissed him again, slowly. Her voice lowered. "Maybe whisper in my ear…"

The cool smirk he managed was impressive given the turmoil that erupted in his body. "As you wish my love."

After dinner, Christine noticed that Erik was getting tense. He had grown quiet during their meal, which she attributed to his habit of always wanting to listen to her instead of talking himself. She helped him clear the dishes away and he brought out the palmiers. When she complimented him on how perfect the twisted little layers looked, he barely hummed in response.

"Are you alright darling?" She asked sweetly, touching his cheek. He was acting similar to this morning, almost shutting down on her.

"Yes yes, I'm fine."

Eyeing him suspiciously, Christine took one of the cookies and broke it in half. She slipped one piece in her mouth, holding the other up to Erik. His mouth opened automatically, quite used to her feeding him things, but he wouldn't meet her eyes.

"Needs more cinnamon," he grumbled when he finished chewing.

"They're perfect." She grabbed his chin gently and made him look at her. "Talk to me. We're supposed to be having a nice evening, remember? What's wrong?"

Erik gave her a look of sad longing. She recognized it as the same expression he had right before he kissed her for the first time. Now, he kissed her for likely the hundredth time, and here was the passion Christine had been expecting earlier. His hands cupped her face and he pushed her softly against the kitchen counter. The familiar scent of his cologne, and the taste of cinnamon, made her head swim. Hands bunched in his shirt and clung to him. Then just as suddenly, he pulled away, leaning his forehead against hers.

"I don't want to lose you," he whispered.

"Lose me?" She rubbed his back and frowned. "I'm right here darling. I'm not going anywhere." When she pulled back to see his face, he looked even more miserable. Christine resisted the urge to sigh, knowing it would make whatever insecurity he was struggling with right now even worse. She kissed his cheek. "Come here."

Erik followed meekly as she pulled him to the couch, and melted into the outstretched ams she offered. He rested his chin on her shoulder and breathed deep.

"I need you to try and learn to talk to me."

He sighed and turned his head to kiss her neck. "I don't want to lose you," he repeated.

"Why do you think you're going to lose me?"

He met her eyes. For the second time that night he asked, "Can I kiss you?"

Christine decided against asking what the difference was between a few moments ago and now, to suddenly make him feel the need to ask. Instead she said yes. "But afterwards you talk to me, deal?"

"Mhm," he mumbled before devouring her.

Christine indulged him for a time she thought was more than generous. The first time she tried to pull away however, he groaned in protest and held the back of her head. He paused, mouth still on hers but not moving, as though he couldn't quite pull away but still awaited permission for his request. When she kissed him back, that was all he needed.

She didn't try to pull away again. Perhaps this was what he needed, a physical reminder that she cared for him, and wasn't going to leave. She still wished he would speak to her. Eventually, he would have too. But for now she was content to let her lips soothe whatever it was that plagued him.

Cool fingertips traced her collarbone, then slid across her shoulder. She felt the sleeve of her dress pushed aside as he gently stroked back and forth. Her body responded with enthusiasm. Christine remembered her conversation with Meg. If things feel right…

Did things feel right? They certainly did for her. But Erik had seemed upset about something. And yet, he clearly wasn't in the mood for talking. Perhaps they were on the same page.

However while Christine had certainly changed her mind about the initial stipulation of their relationship, she didn't exactly want to explain that. Erik would want to know why. And he'd be worried about whether or not she meant it or would regret it and likely a hundred other things. She didn't want to talk about why. She didn't want to explain. She just wanted him. A conversation could prevent that for no reason other than awkwardness. Subtlety, on the other hand…

She began to push against him slowly. Advancing until his back leaned against the arm of the couch. Her fingers made gradual work of his shirt buttons. Erik moaned when her hands ran down his chest.

"Christine…"

There was a question in his voice and she didn't like it. Her mouth latched onto his neck, endeavoring to silence him. It worked, aside from his surprised grunt.

He was quickly melting to her will. The tenseness in his body faded beneath her fingers. His grip on her tightened, then his hands were wandering. Christine hummed, pleased when they cautiously slipped beneath her dress and up her thighs. One hand moved to tug her hair back, just shy of gently, and bent his head to kiss across her chest. His mask pressed against her skin. She giggled, full of breath and pleasure. Erik paused.

Christine felt the tension seep back into his body and almost growled. He went stone still, hands still gripping her beneath the dress, lips poised at her neckline. Then he pulled away.

"Christine…I…"

She masked her frustration and held his cheeks gently. "It's ok darling."

"No. It's not."

"Listen to me Erik." She scooted closer to him, leaning forward. Apparently she was going to have to talk after all. "I changed my mind. We don't have to wait until I tell my dad. If you want to…I want to."

The surprise on his face caught her off guard. He looked genuinely stunned at this declaration, as if that hadn't been where she was "subtly" steering them moments ago. Perhaps they were not as on the same page as she thought. His face changed slightly as he looked her over, eyes darkening.

"Really?"

"Really."

He slowly leaned in as if to kiss her. His lip quirked up in a half smile. Their lips had barely brushed when he pulled away again, growling.

"No. No. I'm procrastinating."

"What?"

Instead of answering he slid her off his lap and stood, pacing. He rubbed the back of his neck and stared at the ground.

"Erik, what's wrong?" Christine asked, voice kind but now insistent.

He stopped. Looked at her. "Christine. Christine, I…" He faltered and growled again. The next moment he turned and disappeared into the kitchen.

"Erik!"

He appeared seconds later, downing a glass of amber liquid. He slammed it on the table so hard she was afraid it would break. "Christine. I'm ugly."

She couldn't help it. She laughed. The way he said it, so abrupt and stern, the words so contradictory to the appealing man before her, it was inherently humorous. She stopped when she saw the seriousness in his eyes, now tinged with hurt.

"I'm sorry," she said quickly, face falling. "I didn't mean it like that…just the way you said it…" He stared at her. She tried her reaction again. "Ok. You're ugly."

He nodded once. "I didn't ever…I mean…I didn't want to show you. Not ever. But the thing is I…" Fingers tapped his leg. He moved to sit on the coffee table across from her. He took her hands and looked her in the eye. "Christine I love you."

She smiled softly. Mischievously. "Je sais. Je t'aime aussi."

Erik grinned and shook his head. "You little fox."

They laughed for a moment, gazing at each other fondly. Christine waited for him to kiss her. That's normally what people did when they confessed their love for each other right? But he didn't. Instead his face grew serious again.

"I don't think you should say that until…" He was having trouble finishing his sentences. Christine was determined to be patient. His grip on her hands tightened. "I know you plan to tell your father about us soon. And I know that won't be easy and it may cause problems between you…and I love you so much I just don't think it would be fair of me to let you go through all that trouble for…for nothing…"

Her brows knit in confusion. Why would telling her father be for nothing? Then it hit her and she gasped. "Erik. Do you think I'm going to leave you if you show me your face?" He looked at the floor and that was all the confirmation she needed. "Erik how could you think that of me?"

"It's not what I think of you," he said quickly. "It's…it's what I think of me. I don't blame you, Christine. I won't think any less of you I promise."

"Stop talking like that!" She regretted the edge in her voice but she couldn't help it. She placed a hand softly on his cheek in apology. "Whatever people have done to you before, Erik, I promise that stops here."

He let out a shuddering breath. "They made promises too."

"Then let me prove it to you."

His hands were trembling slightly as they pulled away from hers. He still couldn't meet her eyes. One hand reached slowly toward his mask, then stopped. For the second time, he made an abrupt exit to the kitchen, grabbing his glass off the table. Christine waited patiently. She heard him pour another drink.

He returned and sat next to her on the couch. A foot of space between them. His shirt was still open and it made him feel extra vulnerable but his hands were shaking too badly to correct it.

"Ok," he said determinedly. "Ok ok." He tapped his knees and made no move toward his mask.

"Do you want me to do it?" Christine asked gently.

Erik glanced at her for a brief second before looking away again. He pondered this. "No…no I should."

"Ok."

Two whole minutes slipped by. Christine finally closed the space between them and took one of his hands. Placing hers on top, she guided his to the edge of the mask. Erik finally looked at her, eyes full of fear. She squeezed his hand encouragingly.

A deep breath, one quick movement, and it was off.

Erik's entire body went rigid and his eyes squeezed shut. The mask fell to the floor and he instinctively leaned back, away from her. He waited for a horrified gasp. Perhaps her fleeing foot steps and the door slamming shut.

Silence. Deafening, horrid, silence. Seconds dripped by and he couldn't move. He began to wonder if he had missed it, perhaps he had been so preoccupied with his own terror he didn't hear her leave. Cautiously, he opened his eyes.

Christine still sat next to him, smiling gently. Waiting for him to look at her. When he finally did, she reached out and placed her hands on his shoulders.

"Silly boy."

Erik sat stunned as she moved onto his lap, wrapping her arms around him tightly. She buried her face in his neck and pressed against him, wanting him to feel her, warm and real and present. Gradually, he began to return her embrace.

Christine lifted her head to whisper in his ear. "I love you."

He let out a shaky sigh, relieved and overwhelmed. "Oh Christine…"

She turned and kissed his one smooth cheek. "I love this." She kissed his ruined cheek. "I love this." Her hand pressed against his chest, over his heart. "And I love this."

The hands on her back were still shaking slightly, but she hoped it was now relief rather than fear. "I love you. God I love you, Christine."'

She grinned and this time, they did kiss. She had grown so used to the presence of his mask that feeling his lips without it for the first time was surprising. They could move so much more freely. She hadn't realized just how much it got in the way. Her head tilted as she explored his mouth from a whole new angle. Erik seemed to notice the difference too, groaning slightly.

They eventually stopped to catch their breath. Erik pulled her close and held her tightly. Christine returned the embrace with equal vigor.

They stayed like for a long time. Eventually Erik's breathing steadied with the acceptance that she was not leaving. His forehead rested on her shoulder. When she began stroking his hair, he cleared his throat uncomfortably.

"There's um…just one other thing."

"What is it love?"

"I'm blonde."

The hands in his hair stilled and he pulled away to look at her. He gauged her face for a reaction and saw only curiosity.

"I mean it…it's supposed to be black. It was. I don't know what happened but it started changing when I was a teenager and well…I didn't like it."

She cocked her head. "So you dye it?"

He nodded. She smiled softly. "Ok."

"Does it bother you? It's ok if it does," he added quickly.

Christine rolled her eyes and pecked his lips. "No. It doesn't bother me. Do whatever you like with your hair. I'm still in love with you."

The way she said that sent his heart thumping. His smile made Christine's insides melt. She kissed him again, a little harder. She pulled away just slightly, running her hand down his chest.

"And just so you know…I meant what I said."

He almost asked her to specify, but he knew exactly what she meant. He swallowed hard. "I…uh…"

His hesitation did immediate damage to her confidence. It had never occurred to her that he might have reservations. "There's no pressure," she said quickly. "I just want you to know how I feel."

Erik squirmed slightly. "Don't feel like you have to own to what you said…b-before. I know this may take some getting used to…"

Oh. Christine held back a sigh. He was still worried about her. About his face. "Erik…"

His eyes brightened just slightly with an idea. "I could still wear it for now," He reached toward his mask on the floor. "I don't mind, if it makes you feel better-"

She grabbed his arm and turned his face toward her. "No. I don't want you to wear it."

He cocked his head curiously, as though he genuinely couldn't understand why she said that.

"I love all of you." She shifted in his lap, gripping his shoulders as she moved against him. "I want all of you."

The fear and hesitation slowly left his eyes, replaced with desire. His hands slipped into her hair and he kissed her hungrily, again and again. He pulled away just long enough to whisper one more time,

"You're sure?"

Her answer was half a nod before pushing his shirt the rest of the way off. He took no further convincing.

Yaaa confession...I forgot I had this posted here and have only been updating on Ao3...whoops lol