a/n: This chapter was thoroughly enjoyable for me to write. I hope you all enjoy.

5. trust issues

-x-

"They're called steroids," Sakamoto said to Gintoki, while the two were on a private mission to Kyoto. "You take 'em and you can grow muscles faster than anything else you can do naturally."

"That's fucked up," Gintoki said, balefully glancing at the syringes Tatsuma had been carrying in a small leather bag. "I don't care how well they work, I ain't taking that - whatever it is."

"We're losing men," Sakamoto said, shrugging at Gintoki's lackluster response. "I've been offering them to our soldiers - they've been recovering at twice the normal rate."

"Does Takasugi know? And hang on, are you taking these?"

"Who cares? I'm not taking them - I'm doing just fine. It's not like you or me need it."

Gintoki sighed. "This isn't right."

"What, like we're all worried about dying from old age?" Sakamoto laughed bitterly. "I'm trying to protect everybody. If bargaining with those monsters means I'm gonna see a bit of road rage or early heart attacks, who cares if we win wars?"

"We're not even winning."

"Then this ought've changed their mind, huh?" The quiet tension between the two was starting up again - and Gintoki could feel it coming.

He sighed, knowing it was wiser to remain diplomatic. "I guess."

There was a hard glint coming from Sakamoto as he steered the spaceship above the gray clouds. "Gintoki, I don't s'pose you know what I went through to get these, right?"

"No, but - "

"I bargained my sister's locket. For a hundred injections."

Gintoki opened his mouth, but a lump came to his throat. "Tatsuma..."

"No one ever appreciates what I do," he muttered in a low voice.

"That ain't true, it's just - "

"Just what?" Tatsuma finally looked at Gintoki with an expression settled firmly between frustration and anger. "I came here to win, and now you're fucking think we don't have a chance. You told me that we were guaranteed to win, goddammit - "

"That ain't it at all," Gintoki said firmly. "Look, you're tired. Hell, you forgot to call me Kintoki."

"I'm not makin' this up in my head!" Sakamoto protested, a little heated.

"You're not. But Bakasugi and Zura have been getting to you lately. When was the last time you slept, anyhow?"

Sakamoto ran a hand through his wild curly hair, sighing deeply. "I dunno. A day ago? Maybe it was two."

"Get some sleep."

"Gintoki - "

"Do it or I'll knock you upside the head," he ordered. "There's a bunk downstairs."

-x-

"Well, Tatsuma, I'll never quite forgive you for not asking us if it was a good idea to introduce cortisone shots to our soldiers, but I'll let you off the hook for giving me a dose," Gintoki said, shaken by his abilities.

And quite suddenly, he found the entire lobby eerily quiet. Gintoki had knocked out every female soldier who had come to attack him, leaving behind an entire room of unconscious bodies, weapons flung chaotically all over the wooden floor. It had happened too fast, too efficiently, that it almost left him nauseous with his newfound power.

Those steroids are no joke, Gintoki thought to himself. He wondered in an abstract way if he had sacrificed years of his life in exchange for the muscle mass he'd gained in less than two days.

Seita looked at Gintoki in wonder. "Are you... some demon?" the boy asked, shrinking away from Gintoki as doubt and mistrust grew in his small eyes.

"No," Gintoki said flatly. For some reason the moniker of the Shiroyasha gave him no joy this moment. Previously he would have gloried in it, would have basked in the attention that the legend provided him, but here he stood from a pile of female bodies - injured, perhaps even marred, and undoubtedly unconscious of their surroundings. There was no point in glorifying a man who defeated women. It was cowardly and disgraceful, even for someone like he whom held unconventional bushido.

He made his way quickly to the elevator and pushed the button to go up. "Come on, Seita, we haven't had any time to lose."

-x-

"He's powerful," Jiraia said, twenty stories above the scene. He folded the telescope and stowed it away his pocket. "Tsukuyo, you must warn Hinowa. It seems as if he intends to go to her directly."

"Yes, Shishou. Shall I call more guards?"

"Would they be useful? We need not waste lives."

"Yes, I suppose not. Where are you heading to, Shishou?"

"Out."

"... Shishou? What do you mean?"

"I see no point in intervening, and it'd be a waste of my time to take down such a demon warrior." Jiraia glanced at Tsukuyo. "Hosen will finish him off. In the meantime make sure that none of the women are hurt."

"Shishou! What on earth - "

"A life without Amanto is no less peaceful than a life with them. I do not care for the matter."

She swallowed. Jiraia held disdain for those who served under masters, preferring to work under the guise of self-sufficiency. In private he held the views that Hosen saw Yoshiwara as his own property like a child with a toy, and expressed contempt towards his lord's obsession with Hinowa. Why he had stayed here, Tsukuyo had no idea.

"... I suppose I'll see you at the dojo when it's all over?"

He nodded. "Prepare me a full report when you get back."

"Yes, Shishou."

Unbeknownst to Tsukuyo, she had no idea that this was a test of loyalty.

-x-

A familiar wave of sadness washed over Tsukuyo as she remembered the string of events that led to Hinowa's imprisonment.

It wasn't Hinowa's fault. It was simply a consequence of living under the dictatorship of a monster. No one could blame Hinowa for wanting a child - in fact, the entire quarter whom she shared living spaces with had openly agreed to supervise Matsu's childbirth. The poor girl was so young, and the lover whom had impregnated her had abandoned her ever since he had found out about her incoming pregnancy. Hinowa had planned to ask a patron to take the child to a caretaker after the childbirth had passed, but it was not to be so. The mother had died not too long after, and Hinowa had grieved for the girl.

Hosen had discovered the entire affair and was outraged that anyone would conspire to break the law under his rule. It was then that Hinowa escaped with the baby, only to be bought back on the condition that none of the other courtesans would suffer for her actions.

And to everyone's horror, Hosen had stripped her legs, making sure that Hinowa could no longer walk. She was banished to a far off room where she was forbidden from speaking to any man or woman save for Tsukuyo, whom was only allowed on the condition that she would forever prevent Hinowa from escaping Yoshiwara once more. Hosen's rage over what he considered betrayal had not subsided for years, and he would even degrade Hinowa's body by taking her to bed every so often. The wounds would be apparent once Tsukuyo ordered Hinowa to undress in front of her.

"This is horrible," Tsukuyo would say as she smoothed healing ointment over Hinowa's bruised skin.

"It doesn't hurt a bit," Hinowa said, smiling sadly, but the two of them knew it was a lie. "Oh don't cry, Tsukuyo dear."

But it'd been too late. The tears flowed down Tsukuyo's face freely and she was too upset to continue bandaging Hinowa's wounds. Her beautiful sister had been torn away from her and she could do nothing about it. Everything that she had worked for - the oath she had made over her scar, her training with Jiraia - had been completely useless. She could not protect Hinowa anymore.

Some part of her childhood had died then and there. The naivety of her whom once believed that Yoshiwara could be saved shattered into a thousand pieces.

-x-

The Tsukuyo who walked towards the tallest tower was no longer a girl whom wished to be saved by a man. She could only rely on luck.

She knocked on Hinowa's door, softly calling out, "Hinowa? It's me."

"Come in."

Tsukuyo unlocked the door with a heavy golden key, pushing the doors open before slipping in quietly. As had been custom for the last eight years, Hinowa was sitting with her legs tucked below, in front of the balcony and peering below the street where merchants and patrons walked freely in the street.

"Did Hosen give you permission to visit me?" she asked softly, her voice musical and feminine.

"No."

"You must make it quick, then. I believe there was a commotion down below."

"I came here to protect you."

Hinowa's rose-colored lips quirked up in melancholy, her eyes landing on Tsukuyo. "What would a soldier want with someone like me?"

"Who knows?" The other woman lit up her pipe, breathing in the comforting smoke to settle her unease. "But it's best if I'm here with you."

Hinowa nodded, her head bowed. "Today I thought... that something might happen."

"What do you mean?"

"There's a storm coming," Hinowa said, turning her head back to the window once more. "I can feel it."

-x-

The halls were dark and empty once Gintoki had reached the top floor. As he stepped off the elevator, his senses were prickling. One not to avoid his survivor instinct honed after a year of constant war, he unsheathed his sword.

Not a second later a knife was firmly lodged into the wooden pillar, mere centimeters away from his head.

"Who's there?" he shouted. "Show yourself!"

It was against her protocol to show herself. And yet Tsukuyo could not help it. She wanted to see the boy that Hinowa had sacrificed her livelihood for. She stepped out of the crevice, revealing her form in the midst of shadowy darkness.

"Oh," she said coolly. "It's you."

Gintoki was not as forgiving. With a flick of his wrist, he pointed his sword at her neck. "What are you doing up here?"

"My job. Do you believe you can simply show up here?" she asked. "You endangered Seita when you came up here."

"You'd rather not take a risk at all," he replied, irritated. "I gave you a chance to change the world. And you'd rather live in this cage of oppression."

Instead of paying any attention to him, she looked at Seita, who was trembling. "Your mother is in that room."

"Will you kill me if I go inside there?" the boy asked, his voice shaking in fear.

"No."

"Are there assassins in there?"

"No."

And with boyish courage, Seita took a deep breath and pushed open the door. It closed with a clang, reverberating across the long and empty hallway, leaving behind Tsukuyo who still glanced coolly at the metal sword pointed at her neck. Slowly, and not without some distrust, Gintoki lowered it, no doubt harboring suspicion for her motives.

"What are you playin' at?" he asked gruffly, sheathing his sword.

"I'm only here ta pay a favor for a very old friend," she said. Her mouth finally dislodged the pipe, and she held it between her two fingers, blowing smoke in the opposite direction. "My master has decided not to pursue you."

"Why?"

"I don't know."

"Well that's one less enemy that I'll have to worry about," Gintoki sighed.

"You thought about taking down Shishou?" Tsukuyo laughed darkly. "You must be joking."

"I'm not. Your master was part of the organization who burned down my school, and killed my village." Gintoki fixed her a hard stare. "I bear you no grudge, but this is part of my vengeance, and if I'll have to kill you to get to him, I will."

She paused, sensing he was serious. "There wouldn't be any point to that. He's already turned his backs on the Oniwabanshuu."

"All the same, if I ever find out he was part of the Kansai Purge... "

"You won't." Tsukuyo replied curtly. "He never talks about his past."

She'd never heard Jiraia speak of anything except of things that were directly correlated to her training. It was either a new weapon she had to master, of ninja techniques she was required to excel in, or of disguises that would allow her to kill others. He was uninterested in politicians, and she could not recall the last time she had seen her master partaking in any activity other than patrolling the city or teaching his students.

Gintoki remained unconvinced. "Who would, in a city like yours?"

"It's not my city."

"Tsukuyo, forgive me for saying this, but you wouldn't leave Yoshiwara even if someone offered you a billion yen." Gintoki hunkered down, sitting next to the door. "You're chained to this place, as I am to my own master."

His insight into her personality galled her. He read her like a book. He had always read her mind and yet he was the one man in the world from whom she would like to hide her real thoughts. And perhaps it was more infuriating that he would still be willing to extend the hand of friendship, when she would have thoroughly preferred to be alone, away from people she cared about.

He took out a flask of alcohol and took a swig, fortifying himself. "Want some?"

"I make it a point to never such accept things from men," she said shortly.

"Suit yourself." Gintoki took another swig and then stowed away the flask in his pocket.

A few minutes passed in silence as the two of them waited for Seita to come out of Hinowa's bedroom. Tsukuyo went to replace the tobacco in her pipe as she smoked another round, and Gintoki took the time to thoroughly examine the blonde whom refused to sit next to him either out of spite or pride.

"What the hell are ya lookin' at?" she asked rudely, once she caught him staring.

"Nothing," he said, lying through his teeth. "But you ain't bad looking either."

"I'm gonna forget you ever said that," she replied. Crossing her arms she took another puff of her pipe. "It's probably time for Seita to go home now."

"Do we really have to cut his time short?" Gintoki asked. "It's been years since he's seen his mom, y'know - "

"You wanna see the kid gutted like a pig?"

"No, but - "

"Then you two better escape. I know a good entryway so that you don't have ta take the elevators."

He swallowed hard. "Seita can't see her again?"

"If he wants his mother to live, then yeah."

"This ain't no way to live," Gintoki pleaded. "Surely you could sneak him in again."

"I couldn't, not on my life." Tsukuyo's eyes narrowed. "I'm already doin' enough for you. I'm under no obligation to help ya further."

She pushed the door, but before so Seita had come rushing out. On his back, Hinowa had clung to the child.

"You fool!" Tsukuyo proclaimed, the blood draining from her face. Hinowa looked at her helplessly. "How on earth do ya think you'll escape like this?"

Gintoki looked at her sympathetically. "You could join me," he suggested. "I told Seita that I was willing to rescue him and his mother."

"Not you too!" In her fury she shoved Gintoki back. "You are endangerin' me and my livelihood, goddamn you all!"

"Tsukuyo, my love, you must trust us," Hinowa said gently. "After all, this man has reunited me and Seita together. His plan is to destroy Hosen - "

"A gamble in which we lose entirely!" Tsukuyo nearly shouted. "If you escape, Hosen will know! Have you all gone mad?"

"It's worth a try," Gintoki said. "And you thoroughly underestimate my skills, Shinigami Dayuu."

She turned away, upset. "You all are askin' me to agree to something that is impossible."

"Not impossible. Simply something quite improbable."

"That's the same damn thing!" she growled.

"Gin-san, Seita-kun - would you give me some time to talk to Tsukuyo?" Hinowa asked. The boy nodded, carefully placing the older courtesan to the ground. "Thank you dear."

The two walked off while Tsukuyo finally sat down next to Hinowa.

"This is crazy," she said flatly. "You can't walk and Seita can't carry you all the way out there. Other than me and Gintoki, there's no way we could take down Hosen."

"But Hosen is weak against the sun," Hinowa murmured softly. "He is not unbeatable."

At this, Tsukuyo's eyes widened. "What?" Don't tell me that perm-head was actually right?

Hinowa nodded. "Ever since I have been a child, he has always needed an umbrella to protect him from the sun. If he is exposed even for a tiny bit, his skin will burn."

"It's still a gamble. We shouldn't play with our lives."

"I've paid years on a gamble," Hinowa replied, gesturing to her legs. "And you have to play with something in your life, right?"

Tsukuyo glared at Hinowa. "That is not the gamble I wanted to make."

"What would you have me do, Tsukuyo? Have me sit up there for ten more years, wasting away until Hosen dies?"

"No, but - "

"Please, my dear... just this one time, please let me have a bit of faith in us." Hinowa put both her hands into Tsukuyo's palm, beseeching her in the only way that she had left: the honor of friendship.

Tsukuyo's mind furiously whirled, thinking of the secret passageway near the roof of Yoshiwara. Her heart beat quick at the merest possibility of escaping Yoshiwara. Would it be possible to lure Hosen to a spot where one might strategically target him with sunlight? Was this idea of freeing the courtesans truly feasible?

It was no use to think about it. If Hinowa wanted to be free, and to risk her life once more, than it would be inevitable that Tsukuyo would be linked to her fate. And if Hinowa was not here in Yoshiwara, she figured she might as well be dead.

She finally stood up, Hinowa looking at her hopefully.

"There's a room where you can open the roof," she said quietly.

"Oh, Tsukuyo! I've heard rumors about that."

"Right, but I've actually been there."

"It'd seem appropriate if you could give us directions. If you could lure Hosen to the center of Yoshiwara, at the right moment, we could open it then."

"Right," Tsukuyo said, still quiet and still brooding. "You must get there at all costs. No exceptions."

"Of course I will. I promise I will."

-x-

"Seita!"

"Yes?"

"There's a pipe out front from the corner of the hall, a few meters above your head. If you slip inside, head left, you'll be able to help your mom."

"Gotcha," the boy said, hooking his arms behind Hinowa, lifting her up gently so she could clamber on his back again. The sight of it made Tsukuyo a little sick, knowing that if she had more gumption it would be her who would have carried Hinowa, not an eight year old boy.

I'm sorry, Hinowa. If it weren't just me and you against the world. She cut off that thought shortly, for negative thoughts had never produced positive actions.

After ensuring that Seita and Hinowa had safely entered the pipe without any complications, Tsukuyo handed Hinowa what was left of her matchsticks, originally used to light up her pipe. Without such things they would have to trust their senses in the dark, and though Tsukuyo knew that they were safe for now, they would not be completely out of danger. Hinowa's fame - dimmed considerably over the span of eight years, but still recognizable - could endanger her and Seita.

"Good luck," she said. "You should be able to get there in thirty minutes."

"Tsukuyo, my dear - "

"Yes?"

"I love you," Hinowa said sincerely. "I truly do."

"For God's sake, don't make this into anything more bothersome," Tsukuyo said, flushing red. "Anyways, go! We may be running out of time."

Tsukuyo then turned to Gintoki who seemed impressed at her quick decision. "We'd better find Hosen."

"Okay." He pressed the button on the elevator, the light beeped not too long after. "What good luck!" Gintoki remarked.

Tsukuyo on the other hand, was suspicious. "Hold up - there shouldn't have been anybody down there."

The doors opened. In silent horror, Tsukuyo watched as Jiraia step out.

-x-

"Shishou - "

He ignored her, pushing Tsukuyo out the way. Flinging the doors open to Hinowa's bedroom, he saw that it was empty.

"Shishou, I can explain - "

With a quick movement, he slapped her. Hard.

"Where is she?" he asked, coldly. Tsukuyo raised a hand to her cheek, touching the spot where flesh had met flesh, fearful of further punishment.

Still, she could not answer that. Not even her master could intercede in such a matter like this.

"I told you to warn her," Jiraia said, grasping her by the neck, pinning her to the wall. "And this is the reward you choose to repay the man who rescued you from a life of depravity? Has this man brainwashed you so thoroughly that you would turn your back on me?"

"Shishou, please," Tsukuyo begged, though her breaths had grown short. "Hinowa escaped of her own will - "

Pow! The second blow knocked out all the wind from her, a dizzying punch that bruised her cheek. For a moment all Tsukuyo could see were stars before the image of her master materialized in front of her once more. She wanted to cry out from the pain, but could not, would not say anything. For this was her master. It was folly to fight against someone insurmountable. And he was terror, he was hate, and she feared him above all other men.

"She was a whore who could not walk." Jiraia said, a low rumble of anger running through his veins. "Tsukuyo, there are no rooms here for liars or cheats."

And suddenly his grip from her throat released.

Gintoki had aimed a left uppercut, slamming his fist against Jiraia's jaw, throwing him several meters away. His body crumpled at the base of a wooden pillar, making a sizable dent of splinters below the ground.

"She wasn't lying, you son of a bitch." Tsukuyo turned, only to see Gintoki's red eyes flashing in impassioned fury.

"It was I who advised Hinowa to escape. Never lay your hands on that woman ever again."

-x-

to be continued

a/n: A very long chapter to compensate for the rather short one last week. As always, I love reading reviews, and will always encourage every one of you to leave a good review. :)