To anyone rereading this - there was some change in the first scene with added background. When I reread the story, it felt too rushed without it. Sorry about this fickleness, folks. I'll try not to let it happen again.

LaChenna - Thank you for the review! I agree... actually I do feel bad for totaling the car, but... *Shrug* law of story XD

kristel142 - thank you! Glad you like it!

Thank you all those who followed this story! Means a lot to me that you all are reading this.

Ok, things are going to get a little more serious as we head to the end. I've decided to do maybe two more chapters and then its over... sad, but we all (myself included) deserve an ending.

Safety First

The worst had come to pass.

It was gone.

Kanda had no words. There was just… silence. This eerie echo inside his mind. Everything seemed so far away, the words and sounds from the outside world passing over him like some out-of-body experience.

His car. His second love.

Was… totaled.

The image of that tree branch collapsed on his trunk, metal bent up at both sides, remains of the engine exposed, was etched in his brain like an after-image from a too-bright lightbulb. It didn't take a mechanic, Moyashi's alleged vehicle experience, or even the insurance representative to tell him it was wrecked beyond use. Never to work or be the same again until several months in the mechanic's, or whatever passed for a mechanic in the ass-crack middle of Florida.

Said insurance representative and mechanic assured him no one was at fault. A freak accident of the weather. Just one more thing that happened no matter what part of the world you lived in. Insurance would cover it. No reason to be upset.

Fuck that.

In the span of two days, he'd been robbed, scared shitless, and lost his second-most valuable possession. All three things that had never happened, not once, in his twenty-three years on planet Earth.

The last two days had one thing in common.

Allen Walker.

Moyashi was a walking bad-luck charm. Since day one, he'd managed to not only pawn his mangy golden carpet onto Kanda's plans, but also insinuate himself into every aspect of the road trip. At which point, inevitably, the Brit managed to ruin them. Hell, he'd even managed to recreate his infamous vehicle break-down, only this time performed on Kanda's innocent baby sedan. Made worse by the so-called 'freak' weather phenomena that allegedly plagued most of the south east.

No one's fault? Bullshit.

All he wanted was to sit and stew in his own silent rage. Until, hopefully, he no longer felt like killing anyone who so much as opened their mouths (normally not a problem, but he wasn't very familiar with the local law enforcement and didn't feel like being stuck in the Swamp State any longer than necessary).

That's what he wanted. But as usual, that didn't last.

"Kanda, relax. We'll figure this- ow, ow, ow!"

"Shut. Up." Kanda growled, twisting the other man's finger until he backed up another five feet.

"Hey, listen, we'll figure something out."

"Unless that means finding a time machine and going back to save my car, not interested," he managed to hiss, glaring Allen into the ground.

Moyashi winced, hands held in surrender. "Ok, yeah, that's… but we need to get back on the road."

Fuck that.

The two were stuck in the middle of the same town they'd started in, parked on the sidewalk next to the only available bus stop for fifty miles. Allen was weighed down with their recovered items, Timcanpy was enjoying sniffing out the local wildlife, and Kanda's jeans still hadn't dried.

He was done.

"Wait! Wait up, Bakanda!"

Allen, arms full and jingling behind him, managed to catch up. "Bus'll be here in fifteen. And unless you plan on walking the remaining 500 miles, we need to stick with this."

"'We'?"

Ignoring him, Moyashi continued, "Just sit down. Or… stand, or whatever, but stay here, Ok?" Kanda leveled him with a long, deadly look, and eventually the Brit caved. "Fine. Just… be back soon. Or else-"

Before he could finish, a hiss of tires and a beeping door alerted both travelers to the arrival of the famed Greyhound Bus.

It was hard to tell if Allen sighed in relief or apprehension. Probably the latter, since it was more than obvious the thought of sitting in a thirty-foot tin vehicle with Kanda's rage as his only companion was less than appealing at the best of times. As was further evident when he crossed over to the bus with all the joy of an inmate to his sentencing hearing.

Kanda didn't want to do it. He really, really didn't want to do it.

So far, the trip had ended in nothing but disaster. And what did he have to show for it? Jack shit.

"-da. Kanda. Kanda!"

He started when a white face appeared in his vision. A white face with even whiter hair and a stark red scar over his left eye.

Allen looked unusually… serious. Kanda hadn't seen him look like that since finals junior year after he'd almost failed precalculus. The Brit made a point to meet his gaze before saying, "Lenalee is like our sister, Kanda. Hate me however you want, but if you miss this wedding, you'll hate yourself for years."

That…

Was true. He really did hate the Moyashi.

But…

Lenalee. Annoying Usagi. Wedding of a lifetime.

Kanda had his priorities, god damn it. And never be said that he put aside a trip planned three weeks in advance just because of a little weather trouble. That totaled car.

Yet, looking at a particularly irritated pair of grey eyes, he found himself thinking there was an exception to every rule.

He didn't want to do this. He didn't want to keep traveling with Allen. Unless the other was in a body bag - a dream Kanda was five seconds away from making a reality. Wish granted.

That was, until he recalled the conversation he'd had with Lenalee three months ago.

"Hey Kanda!"

The Japanese man, who'd just finished conversing with Daisya about birthday presents for Tiedoll (a conversation that had put him in a less than reasonable mood) merely grunted. Because, coupling his headache with the cheery tone in Lenalee's voice, he was starting to regret ever picking up the phone.

"Guess what - Lavi and I are getting married!"

"I know that." The stupid Usagi had certainly taken his sweet-ass time proposing. So long, in fact, that Lenalee had ended up proposing first. An event Kanda was still lording over Lavi's head.

Lenalee chuckled at his tone. "Yeah, but we've finally set a date - it's in March!"

"March. In Boston."

"It's not in Boston. Lavi's taking me to the Florida Keys. Well, Bookman, technically, but it was his idea. And god was it a good one - after all this snow, I could use some sunshine. But don't worry - it's right after your Japanese trip, so you'll be able to come. I made sure."

Kanda had quit paying attention about halfway through. Because... Florida. He was in Canada. That was... far. It would take him a week, at least. He hadn't been that far away from home since moving to Canada five years ago. There was his Japanese trip, but that was only every couple of years.

He hadn't been that far away from Alma in five years.

"...Kanda?"

The Japanese man realized several seconds had passed and he hadn't replied. "I haven't been that far away since..." he found himself saying, trying to voice what he couldn't quite explain.

Lenalee was silent, knowing better than most what was holding him back. "I'm sorry," came her soft, sincere voice. "I didn't think."

Kanda frowned, torn between irritation at her tone and irritation at himself for worrying her.

"I understand if you don't want to come," she finally said, voice so soft and dejected he was briefly reminded of a kicked kitten. "But... you're my best friend, Kanda. Practically my brother - but don't tell Komui I think that or he'll get jealous," she mock-whispered. "It would mean so much to me if you came. I really... it wouldn't be the same without you."

And just like that, he felt like the biggest ass since Allen Walker had been born.

"Fuck, fine. I'll be there."

"Yay!" Lenalee cheered so loud, Kanda winced. "Driving or flying?"

"Not sure."

"Well, either way, keep me updated. Oh, and I'll send you a tracker app to download - that way if anything happens I can find you."

Kanda didn't bother holding in an eye-roll. "Whatever."

"Thank you, Kanda, I'm so happy. Love you!"

Kanda was jarred back to reality by the beeping doors of the greyhound bus. The southern sun was in his eyes, the Moyashi was waiting, and Lenalee's wedding was in forty-eight hours.

God damn it. He had to go, didn't he?

"I'm still pissed off," Kanda felt the need to growl.

Allen rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I kind of noticed. Come on. Let's get this road trip back on the road. Tim?"

XXXXX

The bus was only moderately full with every other seat occupied. Despite that, the three of them ended up sharing the same bench. Kanda, for once, didn't blame the Moyashi at the lack of privacy. Honestly, he was trying to mediate and calm some of his nerves before the bachelor party. Not that the crying five-year-old and chatty grandmother in the back were helping, but the earbuds helped.

After about a half an hour, the Japanese ended up against the window, suddenly overcome with exhaustion. Timcanpy, the buffer between the two travel companions, sat in the middle seat, giving off a warm heat that made Kanda feel even more snug in his still-damp clothing.

Tim was also using his seated position to spy on the other passengers. Not unlike his owner who, despite not having access to the window seat, managed to see just about every arguably scenic and not-so scenic view they passed. Which he didn't mind telling the neighboring five-year-old in great detail.

Soon, Kanda was lulled to sleep by the soft motions of the bus, filtered sunlight through the windows, and the even tones of Allen's slightly raspy voice. The kid across the aisle had also calmed down – when they boarded the bus he'd been bouncing in his seat, too bored for his mom to do much anymore, but Allen's conversation seemed to keep his attention.

Allen would be a great dad someday.

…

What the fuck?

He was tired. Had to be.

And it was shortly after that disturbing thought that he fell asleep.

XXXXX

Allen managed to spend a few hours in peaceful silence, Kanda napping, Timcanpy enjoying the ride, and the Brit chatting up the fellow passengers.

Everything was fine. For three hours.

"Everyone off the bus!" called the driver – a middle-aged man in the process of waving most of the occupants towards the now-open bus doors. "Off, off! Ma'am, don't forget yer bag, there."

"What's going on?" The Brit asked, having been too engrossed in his conversation with the almost-six-year-old to pay attention to anything besides I-Spy.

"Some kinda mechanical problem," the driver explained, bus listing when the heavy-set man tromped down the aisle to make sure no one forgot anything. "Need to stop at a mechanics to get it checked out. Best we stop early for the night."

What was it with this trip and vehicle failures?

Kanda, who'd woken from his nap, shot Allen a non-too subtle glare. Even without words, it was easy to understand he suspected Allen of sabotaging yet another vehicle through his Psionic Powers of Evilness.

Whatever.

Five minutes later, the merry band of travelers and their duffel bags of items found themselves on the sidewalk, watching the other passengers milling down the block to the closest motel.

Now what? Another ride. Shot. They had to be there in... God, three hours? It was already five. That was the only Grayhound for miles. He still had to-

"What the- Bakanda!" Allen called, noticing the Japanese man was halfway across the street. Either not caring or not noticing the thirty-mile-an-hour cars passing around him.

When it was clear the other wasn't waiting, the Brit shouldered his bags, waited for a break in traffic, and followed, Timcanpy at his heels.

"Where the hell are you going?" he gasped, finally catching up to the other at the next street corner.

"To find us another ride," Kanda snapped back.

"Where? Did you manage to check the Greyhoud bus routes when I wasn't looking?" The trio continued past the busy road, down a narrow, paved road.

"I didn't say we'd take a bus."

"Then what are you…"

Allen trailed off, nearly running into Kanda as he spotted it.

"No."

The Japanese man rolled his eyes. "Since you've tanked the last three rides, you have no room to complain."

"It wasn't me!" Allen whined like a toddler accused of drawing on the walls. "Dude, this was not my- wait, that's not the point. The point is Tim gets motion-sick. We're not getting on that."

Kanda had - finally - taken Allen to the beach, complete with seagulls cawing overhead and salty smells lingering in the air. Only, there wasn't any sand. Mostly because the shoreline was covered in ships. Dozens of ships parked by vacationers and locals alike.

But Kanda didn't stop there. No, he continued down the docks towards the tourist part of town where cobbled beach walks stretched before blocks of shopping and restaurants.

Allen noticed everything with a passing glance. Mostly because he was too focused on the monstrosity before his eyes.

Kanda's plan for getting to the bachelor party on time relied on a boat.

Not just any boat. A cruise ship. Which was like the size of the White House.

Allen opened his mouth to say just that - because, no - when a pair of determined sapphire eyes met his. Sapphire eyes tempered by the loss of his car and putting up with all the craziness of the last two days. Not to mention Kanda was armed - a combination that did not mean good things for those testing his patience.

All the protests died in the Brit's throat.

"Fine," Allen found himself agreeing, "But leave the talking to me. And keep that sword out of sight. Last thing I want to do is land in jail."

Kanda didn't say anything, marching down the pier with all the determination of Legolas off to slay an orc. A Legolas whose menace was tampered some by the slobbery sword hanging off his back. Points to Timcanpy who was currently making a valiant effort to pull Mugen straight off of Kanda's duffel before he noticed.

Allen groaned, shouldering his bag and following behind.

XXXXX

Allen did end up getting them passage on the boat- er, ship. After explaining their dire situation to the stewardess, the young lady had no problem charging them a small fee and letting them mill around on deck until the got to Key Largo.

Even if it'd been Kanda's idea, they both knew Allen could buy binkies off of babies; Getting a three-hour ride on a cruise ship was small potatoes by comparison.

They didn't have a place to store their luggage, but the deck was surprisingly vacant since it was close to the dinner hour, leaving several lounge chairs for Allen to throw their things on. Very nice lounge chairs with cushy pillows and a view of the newly-varnished deck, so shiny the sun was almost blinding when it reflected off the floor.

Allen still managed to enjoy it, reclined on a royal blue chaise lounge with his hands behind his head. The sun was at their shoulders, casting Kanda's face in shadows as he leaned against the railing. Tim, who wasn't as seasick as Allen had expected, was napping at the Brit's feet, watching some mini-poodle further down the deck.

Allen sent Lenalee a quick text, letting her know about the change in travel plans and making sure they'd have a ride once they got to the other end. Which was great, since Allen's small pile of cash was barely going to have enough left for the hotel reservation. Forget cab fare. Or dinner.

Hopefully there'd be food at the bachelor party.

The two of them fell into an ensuing silence. Not an uncomfortable silence. Actually, the first one of the trip that was actually… calming.

Allen couldn't stop staring at his friend. Frenemy? Bestie? Acquaintance? None of them seemed quite right.

Staring at whatever-he-was Kanda, all he could think was that… by the end of the week, Kanda would be gone.

He'd go back to Canada. Allen would be back in Maine. The two of them wouldn't see each other again until the next holiday, which was… six months away, at least. And that was assuming Lavi and Lenalee ever got back from their honeymoon.

It was just… well, despite all the problems, the arguments, the headaches… the past few days traveling had actually be kind of…

'Nice' wasn't the word. Maybe, familiar? Nostalgic?

When they were in high school together, it had been the four of them all the time. Then the two of them, when Lavi and Lenalee started dating. After that, Alma had transferred into school. And then… that happened, and Kanda moved to Canada.

And that was it.

Would it go back to the same as before? The two of them never speaking unless Lenalee (sometimes literally) had to twist an arm to get them together?

The white-haired adult didn't want that.

He opened his mouth to say something along those lines. Instead what came out was, "So, you really think I've got some kind of bad-luck thing? Just wondering. I can start keeping my hands to myself if you want."

Did that sound... suggestive? Or was it just Allen?

Apparently it was just Allen. Kanda didn't even dignify him with a look much less pick up on the questionable subtext, head turned into the wind like some kind of posing model. A very fit model, actually, which that wind-swept shirt was doing an awesome job showcasing.

"Everything you've touched in the past three days has broken down. You tell me."

"Hey, that was just circumstances. It had nothing to do with me. I'm not the problem." A snort of disagreement.

Allen could have dropped it there, and probably should have, but he was feeling... restless. For some reason. And since subtly wasn't working, the Brit upped his game. "Come here. Let me touch you and we can see what happens."

Kanda finally looked at him, eyes sparking with what may have been the fading sunlight or... something else. "As if."

Allen smirked. "Afraid?"

"Of what? A beansprout?"

That was a low blow.

Before Allen could snap something back, or maybe just cross the distance on his own, their attention was drawn to the prow of the ship. More importantly, a high-pitched laugh belonging to some nameless kid. A laugh that turned into an exclamation of dismay.

Kanda could see the front of the ship better than Allen could, thanks to his position, which was probably why his brows pinched in concern. After a few seconds, the Brit realized why as a red balloon, caught in the wind, blew towards them, hanging a few feet out over the water as if about to be carried out to sea.

Kanda, in all his strong glory, lunged for the balloon.

It was in that same moment that a huge swell rushed under the ship, lifting Kanda higher into the air before falling back into the waves with a slam.

At the same time, the sudden rocking motion upset Kanda's center of gravity.

Pitching him over the side of the ship.

Gone.

Into the water.

Fuck.

He can't swim, he can't swim, he can't swim- repeated in Allen's head like a mantra. Which was why the Brit didn't think before grabbing the nearest flotation device and jumping overboard.

Allen hit the water with a heavy splash, the momentary free fall tapered by the sudden lukewarm waves.

The waves were stronger than he'd expected, Allen's initial shout drowned out by seawater rushing into his mouth. Fortunately, thanks to a year on the swim team and the flotation device in his hands, the Brit surfaced quickly.

Kanda hadn't drifted far. Although, for someone who couldn't swim, he was doing an impressive job staying afloat, dark head bobbing in the waves like a Japanese man-shaped dingy. Allen tried to breathe and not drown as he navigated the swelling ocean.

Kanda grabbed onto the circular flotation device with a wet cough and a tight grip. Allen, opposite, panted for air as the salty waves continued to bat at his body.

It was only after he was sure Kanda wasn't about to fall back in and drown that he turned to the rope, ready to pull them back in.

Only to realize he hadn't tied the rope to the ship.

Fuck.

It was with that final thought that Allen watched Timcanpy's barking figure slowly grow smaller and smaller, no one coming to the deck or sounding an alarm for men overboard.

"Hey! Over here!"

Nothing.

Despite Allen's hand-waving and groggy shouting, the cruise liner continued to fade towards the horizon, Timcanpy's figure on the deck growing to the size of a pin-head as Allen and Kanda continued to bob in the waves.

Shit.

He couldn't even say it wasn't his fault. Because… it totally was.

But to be fair, if Kanda hadn't gotten himself pitched overboard, they wouldn't be in this mess to begin with.

Allen was about to say just as much out loud when he was faced with a glare that could scare the spots off of puppies. A pretty impressive glare, considering the both of them were bobbing about in the water like a pair of drowned rats.

Allen's mouth closed with an audible click.

Needless to say, he hoped they were rescued as soon as bloody possible.

Key Largo: 3 hours(?)

I'll try to get the other chapters up this weekend or next, (metaphorical) weather permitting. Let me know what you think and Happy Halloween!

P.S. this was inspired by one of the latest issues of Takane and Hana. If you haven't read the series, check it out! But buy the official versions for the really hilarious translations if you can.