"Ah." Professor Muto intoned, with laughter in his eyes and a mischievous quirk to his mouth- not that Umbridge had noticed in the state she was in. "I apologize for the misunderstanding once again. I can assure you, Madam, I am not a Muggle." His vaguely mischievous smile turned into a full blown smirk.

"I'm a Mage."

Chapter 3

Harry watched curiously as Madam Umbridge's entire body seemed to freeze. Her left eye looked to have spontaneously developed a twitch, and the condescending smile on her face she had worn for most of the night had taken on a slightly crazed edge. Several of the first years nearest her leaned away nervously as her mouth started opening and closing, no sound escaping.

"Is something the matter, Madam?" Somehow, Professor Muto's countenance remained unwaveringly polite, yet it was obvious he was deeply amused.

"I- I beg your pardon," she said breathlessly, "I could have sworn you just said you were a-a..." she trailed off with a slightly hysteric giggle.

"A Mage?" The newest professor interjected kindly. Harry wondered at how sincere he sounded. "Not to worry, Madam. You heard correctly." He gave her a reassuring smile. Harry barely held back a snort.

"Impossible!" She laughed, her hysteria more pronounced.

"My dear Dolores," Dumbledore interjected, brows furrowed while his eyes twinkled madly, "I thought you knew."

"Knew?" She whipped her head around at him, equal parts confused and manic. "But-but, I came here. Tonight. I came. The minister told you. I thought-"

"Yes," he said cheerfully, "It seems we've misinterpreted each other. You see, I had assumed the minister wanted to extend a diplomatic hand to the Mage Court through our new professor, and decided sending an ambassador in the form of yourself would be the best option. It sounds as though he has assumed I was unable to procure a Defense professor and decided to extend a, ah, helping hand."

'So that's what she's doing here.' Harry thought, making a small noise of comprehension, echoed by other students around the hall.

"Diplomatic- to the Mage Court- ambassador?" Umbridge stammered, looking torn between fainting and wringing Dumbledore's neck if the clenching and unclenching of her hands was any indication.

"Are you quite alright, Madam?" -Professor Muto glanced at their audience, a slight furrow forming on his brow- "Perhaps it would be better if we discussed this amongst the three of us. Although tomorrow is Saturday, it's getting to be considerably late, and the students need their rest. I'm sure some sleep wouldn't be unwelcome for the professors, either. Or yourself, of course." He said gently, looking nothing but concerned despite the slight dig. The image was only slightly marred by the two remaining creatures hovering around him giggling madly behind their... Harry would just call them hands for now, though they looked more like the ever-changing edges of clouds on a windy day.

Harry raised his own hand to hide the grin forming on his face at Umbridge's slightly lost look as she tried to decide whether she was being insulted somehow by the kind-faced man (she was- he was sure if it).

"An excellent idea, Yugi!" Headmaster Dumbledore announced. "Dolores, would you like to rest here for the night and have the three of us talk in the morning, or would you prefer we discuss this now, in my office perhaps?" As he spoke, the headmaster gestured towards Professor Muto, prompting Umbridge to flick her eyes towards the man.

She made a choked sound as the creatures suddenly draped themselves across his shoulders and fluttered their just-formed eyelashes at her.

Harry's cheeks were beginning to hurt from the smile that was still hidden by his hand.

"No," her voice was that high pitch again, but at least she wasn't screeching, "I- I believe I'll just inform the minister of this new- hem, hem- situation we've found ourselves in and- and he will get back to you. Yes. Yes, I'll just need to collect my belongings and-"

"Ah, I'll accompany you." Professor Muto stood up, the creatures once again hovering in the air around him.

"That's not necessary-" she hastened to deter him, but was cut off.

"Nonsense." He said firmly. "This castle's a maze on a good day. With how tired you must be from the stress of an unnecessary trip" -Harry saw a few people begin to shake with suppressed laughter at the Defense professor's subtle gibe - "it would be far too easy to get lost."

Umbridge made to open her mouth, no doubt to continue the argument, but shut it quickly with a faint squeak as one of the creatures got too close to her for comfort. She promptly turned on her heel and headed towards the Entrance Hall, looking to be moving as fast as possible without outright running.

Following Umbridge out, Professor Muto turned back slightly towards the Great Hall and gave the students a wink just before the Entrance Hall doors closed.

Harry, having put his hand down when Umbridge had her back to him, clapped it back over his mouth to prevent a laugh from escaping, as he didn't want the sudden noise to shock the woman into getting ahold of herself.

He turned back to the staff table when Dumbledore began speaking once more.

"Well, now that that's reasonably settled," Harry almost started laughing when Professor Flitwick snickered, "I believe it would be best if your Heads of Houses led you back to your dormitories for the night. Although this is usually a task for our esteemed prefects, as Professor Muto said, it is getting quite late, and Hogwarts can indeed be a maze." He said, laughter in his voice. "Off you pop!"

Harry and the rest of Gryffindor house followed Professor McGonagall towards Gryffindor Tower.

"Mimbuius mimbletonia." She intoned as they reached the painting of the Fat Lady. Harry piled into the common room with the rest of his House as the portrait door swung open. "Goodnight, students. Do try to get some sleep tonight." She said solemnly, though her lips were twitching.

"Goodnight, Professor." The students replied, just as grave.

As Professor McGonagall stepped into the hallway, the door swung shut behind her.

And the Common Room was promptly filled with shrieking laughter.

RT89: Hope you're satisfied with the reaction! I had a lot of fun writing this chapter! :)