Dorian went to her room, her mind drifting over the events of the day.
Or we could chant. Really? David was useless in every conceivable way. When he had arrived with his luggage and she had asked him to come up with ways to destroy Viki's campaign, the first thing he could think of was to sleep with Viki.
Dorian shuddered to remember.
Then, while Dorian fretted over Blair's obsession with destroying Todd and Tea's wedding, hoping that Ross Rayburn would come through on their plan to distract Blair, that was David's solution. Chant.
He was in the blue room now, having "dinner in bed" – the latest of his self-endowed "perks" of the job of being her campaign manager. She was sure it was his second if not third dinner this evening … and it was late.
She checked her watch. 10:00. She unclasped it from her wrist and began to remove her jewelry, dropping it in the tray on her dressing table. She slipped her shoes off and sat on the edge of her bed with a sigh. Perhaps she should point out that being a slovenly pig would make David lose his physique.
She had to frown and roll her eyes at herself, deriving a twisted pleasure from the thought of letting David grow fat without his knowledge.
They hadn't been divorced all that long, and they had parted on amicable terms, but ever since he had returned to Llanview with his camera crew, there was just something about him that got under her skin, and she couldn't quite put her finger on it.
At least, that's what she told herself. But if she searched her soul of souls, she knew … David wasn't there for her when she needed him.
Sure, he was in Llanview, in her home, acting as her campaign manager … from the blue room, eating her food, taking the paycheck she signed … and suggesting she chant.
…As if that would get her mind off of Blair, or her girls in general, or the fact that he was being no help whatsoever.
There was once a time when David had been there for her, despite her transgressions. Sometimes he was even there a bit too much, and sometimes he even caused the transgressions. What had happened to that David? Now he just sat back and reminded her of them.
She couldn't help but wonder if she had lost him while he was away in Hollywood … if perhaps things would be different tonight if she had not wanted a divorce. She knew the answer to that. She had made the wrong choice. She had chosen … a man who could not live up to the words he had poured into her mind like honey.
Now David was the man who was in Llanview … and he was sleeping in the blue room. How depressing.
And Blair … God willing … had been whisked away from Todd's wedding and would not make a fool of herself. Dorian hesitated to chalk Blair's bewildered intentions up to the passion du Cramers. Dorian also hesitated to admit that in many ways, she and Blair were just alike.
Had she made the wrong decision? David always butted in to situations involving the girls, always had something to say about it, always had some advice to offer or some trouble to stir up. Even with other past loves and boyfriends, Dorian's family was always just that – her family. She made an exception for Herb. Cassie was his, but Adriana and Langston were another life.
It didn't feel like that with Ray.
Ray had given her a sense that they were already family – connected by their daughters. He had told Dorian in no uncertain terms that he wanted, hoped, and even expected her to reach out to Lola. He had wanted to be a part of Langston's life, to provide a connection to family for both her and Lola, he had taken an active interest in Blair's children, and had even been there to comfort and support Dorian through any trials or concerns she had over her girls. He didn't try to dig into her past or her psychology or ask why she did the things she did. He had told her he admired her for protecting her family with such ferocity. What had gone so wrong? Who had given up on them?
Ray wouldn't listen, she told herself.
David used to understand her, comfort her, and offer her good advice. Now? Nothing was ever serious with David. Chant.
All these thoughts whisked through Dorian's mind as she got ready for bed. She was too worked up to even begin to be sleepy, but she wasn't in the mood to leave her room. She sat down on the bed with her laptop and planner and went over her schedule and to-do list. She couldn't count on her campaign manager for an itinerary.
Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, indeed.