Disclaimer: Not the Rowling.
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NOTES:
This is nothing but a wrapper for a dumb, rather crude joke. If you want to read it, go ahead.
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FOUR LEGS
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Four Snatchers Apparated into a forest clearing, expecting to find some blood traitors hiding out from their True Master. They found no-one, but were joined a few moments later by two of His Inner Circle.
"Our Lord sensed Potter's magical signature in this area," said Lucius Malfoy, sneering at the boy's name. "Report!"
The lead Snatcher gave a short bow. "There's no-one here, Lord Malfoy," he said, "just a small rune-stone generating a fire-writing message."
(Losing interest already, Crabbe Sr. wandered off to look around the clearing. Some Muggles had left their rubbish behind. Filthy creatures.)
"Well, what does it say, man?"
The Snatcher shuffled his feet. "Well, sir..."
"Spit it out, man!"
"It's a riddle, sir. 'What has four legs, seven hundred balls, and..."
(Crabbe leaned down to have a look at one piece of rubbish. It had writing embossed on it, but due to its position in the shadows of the undergrowth, it was difficult to make out.)
Malfoy glared at the man when he paused. "Go on!"
Swallowing, the man went on, "and... »ahem« has sexual relations with Death Eaters.' Except it uses a very vulgar word to describe the act, sir."
Pushing the man out of the way, Malfoy took the extra six steps needed to see for himself. "Ah. Muggle crudeness, I suspect. 'What has four legs, seven hundred balls, and f*cks Death Eaters.' Hmm..."
(Squinting, Crabbe was just able to read: 'FRONT TOWARD ENEMY'.)
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Second Lieutenant Harry Potter, newly-commissioned officer in 24 Commando Royal Engineers, grinned and flicked a switch, letting his six daisy-chained Claymore mines supply the punch-line.
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I did warn you.