The moon was high in the sky as Scarlett made her way from the mansion. This particular night was truly a thing of beauty: a balmy breeze stirred the warm, stilted air. The chirrup of crickets were a soft overlay against the crunch of gravel beneath her feet. The smell of freshly cut grass wafted up her nostrils and as she passed the hydrangea shrubs, she caught a curious whiff of peppermint. As the iron gate loomed before her, Scarlett wondered for the first time why on earth it was called Peachtree Street; there wasn't a peach tree in sight! The fools...The soft nicker of horses drew her from these thoughts; a carriage awaited her and as she approached, the friendliest of freckled faces popped out the window.
"Hello, Mother! Where's Wade?"
"He needed time to think things over."
"Oh," she replied, looking crestfallen.
"Get back inside, dear; you don't want your head hanging out like that when the horses begin moving. You gave poor Pork quite a scare last time."
Ella watched her mother as she boarded the carriage, closing the door smartly behind her.
"Is kitty here?" she asked, her eyes round with fright. Scarlett suppressed the urge to roll her eyes.
"No, your brother will be taking care of her."
"She's always biting me; she never bites you or big brother."
The carriage began to move and as it did, Scarlett drew back the curtains and opened the window.
"Why didn't big brother come?"
"I told you; he needs time to-"
"But isn't he going to be all alone in that house?"
"Your brother's eighteen years old; he can take care of himself."
"What will happen to Uncle Ashley?"
"What do you mean?"
"Who's going to take care of the mills and Beau?"
Scarlett grimaced. "I'm sure your Uncle Ashley will be just fine. Besides, we'll be back."
"But why? I hate Atlanta. I never want to come back."
"Don't you want to see your Aunt India again?"
"No," she replied, so stoutly that Scarlett had to suppress a laugh.
"What about Beau?"
She shrugged. "He's alright, but he's always teasing me because my grammar isn't so good."
"It's because you don't work hard enough."
"I do, too! But no one listens to me. Teacher always looks at me strange whenever I ask questions and big brother is always telling me he can't help me because I'm a girl." She folded her arms, huffing. "I bet he just doesn't know how to answer my questions."
Ella looked to her mother for support, but Scarlett was lost in thought.
"Why can't Uncle Ashley come with us?"
"Excuse me?" Scarlett spluttered.
"Why not? It will be more fun that way."
"Your Uncle Ashley is right where he belongs."
"But didn't you love him?"
She had been combing her fingers through her hair, detangling the last of the snarls but froze. "Who told you that?"
"Beau told me; he said that Uncle Ashley wanted to marry-"
"Your Uncle Ashley has a tendency to say a lot of things he doesn't mean. I'm going to have a word with that man," she muttered. "His wife being dead doesn't give him the right to lose himself in that liquor cabinet. If we all carried on the way he did, then we'd all be in the poorhouse."
"But you did love him, right?"
"I suppose you can call it that."
"How long?"
"Fourteen years."
"Wow, that's almost as long as I've been alive."
"Why so long, Mother?"
"I don't know." But seeing those doe's eyes upon her face, Scarlett sighed.
"When your little sister died, he was all I had left."
"What about Rhett?"
"He had gone. You know, Ella, for the longest time, the only one I felt sorry for was myself but I realize now, that he was the one who was truly alone. The only one he ever had was Bonnie and-"
"He had you, Mother."
Mother's face looked so strange: it was how Uncle Ashley would look whenever Cousin Beau brought up Aunt Melly. Scarlett turned to the window, staring out into the void.
"Yes. He had me."
"Didn't you say sorry?"
"There are things that you just can't apologize for, words that you can never take back."
"Why not?"
"It's just the way things are."
"But Aunt Melly said people hurt each other, but that they can always forgive each other."
Scarlett turned to look at Ella, a crease appearing between her eyebrows.
"When did she say that?"
"When she was sick."
Scarlett leaned forward, grabbing Ella by the arm.
"What else did she say?"
"She, she told Wade to be a good boy," Ella stammered, "and she said that you loved us and that Uncle Rhett loved-" The deep ache in her chest erupted into roiling flames. She jerked her hand away.
"Don't tell me anymore."
"But don't you, Mother?" Ella asked uncertainly, rubbing her arm.
"Don't I what, Ella?"
"Don't you love us?"
"Of course I do, darling. Of course I do."
But Ella continued to gaze at Scarlett, and as she did, there was a flash of knowledge to those rabbity brown eyes.
"He loved her more than us, didn't he?"
Scarlett stiffened. "I don't know. I don't know."
"That's why he left, isn't it?" she asked. "It wasn't just Uncle Ashley."
Scarlett slowly turned to face her daughter.
Ella was smiling, rubbing her chin thoughtfully. Her fox eyes were locked on her mother.
"I know what they all say. They all say that Ella is slow, but Ella hears things and Ella understands."
There was not a sound save for the horse's hooves and Scarlett's quick, shallow breaths.
"They were saying things about you, Mother. They're all like that: they talk a lot, but don't say very much so Ella made sure they stopped talking." She started humming a happy tune, kicking her feet. Scarlett stared at her daughter in silence. It was strange: the older her daughter became, the more she began to believe that her simple-mindedness had all been an act.
"But Aunt Melly was right, wasn't she?"
Scarlett continued her moody gaze out the window. "Not everyone is like your Aunt Melly."
Ella scooted closer to Scarlett, resting her head against her shoulder. "But why did he have to go?"
"Ella darling. I'm going to tell you something and you listen. Whether it be your husband, your friend, your brother, or even your mother and father, everyone leaves and when that happens, all you can do is say goodbye."
She tried to extricate herself from Ella's hold, but she merely held on tighter and Scarlett sighed.
"That's what life is, Ella: learning how to say goodbye."
"But I will always have you and big brother."
"Your brother and I won't be around forever."
She pulled away. "Don't talk like that, Mother. You're scaring me."
"It's the truth, darling, the only truth in this world. When the time comes, you'll have to stand on your own. The sooner you accept that, the easier things will be."
"But I don't want to," Ella whispered.
Scarlett reached out, tucking a stray hair behind her daughter's ear. "You're going to have to."
"But you still have Uncle Ashley."
Scarlett laughed. "Yes. I guess I do."
Ella looked down and for a few moments, the pair rode in silence.
"Tell me a story!"
"W-what?"
"Tell me a story!" she exclaimed, all but throwing herself onto her mother's lap.
Scarlett arched one black brow. "You're getting a bit too big for that."
"You're never too old for stories!" she pouted, thrusting out her bottom lip.
"Alright, darling but save your questions for after."
"I promise!"
Scarlett looked at her daughter, at the straggly red hair, the pale peaky face: she was no belle, that was for sure. But then again, what good did all that charm do for her?
"There once was a girl who lived in a field of green that went as far as the eye can see. The sun shone everyday; there was more food than she could ever eat and there was nothing but happiness for miles around. She and her family and friends laughed and sang and played games from dawn until dusk."
"Was she a princess?"
"Yes…she was."
"She had everything she could have ever wanted, but she still wasn't happy. Her mother and father gave her all the gifts money can buy, but it wasn't enough and for many days, she went to bed crying. But one night, she looked out the window and saw the moon: it was so close and yet so far away and that was when she decided that that was what she wanted."
"The moon?"
"Yes. But try as she might, she could never grab hold of it. It was right there in front of her, but she could never touch it and as the days passed, she grew sad. But one night, an angel came to visit her."
"An angel?"
"Yes, and the angel told her that there was a way for her to have the moon, but that she would have to leave everything behind."
"All her family and friends?"
"Yes, and that she couldn't even say goodbye."
"I wouldn't do that."
"Ella-"
"Sorry, Mother."
"She didn't believe the angel at first, but she turned to look at the moon and she wanted it so badly, that she decided to trust him. And so they flew to the heavens and there it was, the moon, and she was so happy, but when she went to touch it, it burned."
Ella frowned. "That doesn't make sense. Why-"
"Ella!"
"Sorry," she grumbled.
"And she could see her family from the heavens; they searched for her for years, calling her name. She called back, but they couldn't hear her and as time went on, she could bear it no more. She wanted to leave, but when she told the angels that, they were so angry. She begged and pleaded and they eventually let her go; she fell back to earth and she woke up crying because she was so happy, but when she awoke, it was all dark and her family and friends were nowhere to be found. She ran and ran, but it only grew darker..."
"Did she ever see her family again?"
"No, they were all gone."
She shrunk back. "I don't like this story."
"Well, we're not quite finished yet."
Ella wrapped her hands around her upper arms. "I don't want to hear anymore."
"I promise it gets better."
Ella stared at Scarlett, those owl's eyes filled with doubt.
"Alright, Mother," she said, snuggling against Scarlett.
"They were all gone and she was sad, but she knew that one day, she would see them all again..."
Wrapped in her mother's soft embrace, the steady clip-clop of the horses and lulling rock of the carriage began to work their magic upon her. Her mother's voice dropped to a low hum and slowly but surely, Ella fell asleep.
...
She awoke to the sound of what she thought was rain but as she sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she realized that it wasn't rain at all but her mother, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs. Her face was buried in the curtains.
"What's wrong, Mother?" she asked sleepily. "Why are you crying?"
Scarlett raised her eyes to the ceiling and when she spoke, her voice was thick with grief. "They're all gone, aren't they?"
"But he will be back, won't he?"
Scarlett surveyed her daughter with a mixture of annoyance and exhausted futility. This girl...she didn't listen to a word I said. Seeing the fatigue written plainly across her mother's face, Ella pushed forth with dogged conviction.
"I saw it!" she insisted. "I saw it in a dream!"
Scarlett felt tired, so deathly tired. She closed her eyes, pressing her hot cheek against the cold, frosted glass.
"You're right, my darling. He will."
"And when he does, we can be a family again!"
"Yes. Yes."
Her heart was cold and her bones...they ached.
But she was right; there was a way to see him again. Scarlett drew her daughter close, burying her nose in wiry ginger curls. She closed her eyes and drifted.