Chapter 42: The Soda Genie

In spirit of the holidays, here's another chapter

It was another day at Gar's Hero Supply & Bodega. Nebula, Ko, Rad, and Enid were doing their usual tasks when Mr. Gar came out of his office and told them organize and clean out the back. Nebula finished moving the rest of the section that she was assigned to clean. She walked over to help Enid, Ko, and Rad clean their area. "Whatcha' got there little guy?" she asked Ko as she put her cleaning mask and gloves on a nearby shelf. He held out a small case with orange soda in it. "Citrus Twisty" he responded. "Looks like an old, off brand, enchanted soda" Enid commented. "That stuff looks expired to me" she said as she held a black garbage bag open. Rad used his powers to levitate a bottle into his hand. "This stuff has been back here since before I started working at the bodega" he said as he inspected the bottle. He then sniffed it and he held it out to Enid. "I dare you to try it" he taunted. "No way Dodo head! This stuff is probably older then Ko"Enid said with a laugh as she tossed the bottle onto her foot. "He should be the one to try it" She said as she slid it over to Ko. "Okay! After I check out the nutrition facts of course" he said with a wink as he looked away from the small group. Nebula followed his gaze and she looked over at Ko. "Who are you winking at?" she asked. "It's kinda hard to read with all this dust" Ko said as he inspected the bottle to to try and read the nutrition facts. "Seriously. Who were you winking at?" Nebula asked again. "I'll just wipe that off here" he said as he rubbed the bottle with his gloved hand.

The bottle then exploded and a creature with a small body made out of orange bubbles appeared. As well as a pair of eyes, the creature had short arms and a mouth. "It's me Citrus Twisty the Soda Genie!" it spoke happily. "Holy Shnikes it talks!" Nebula said in alarm and surprise. "A genie?!" Ko and Rad said in amazement. "Does that mean we get three wishes?" They asked excitedly. "Can we wish for anything we want?" Rad asked excitedly. "I swear, if she tries anything funny I'm gonna zap her" Nebula whispered threateningly to Enid. "You can wish for anything you want! No matter how foolish" Citrus Twisty explained. Enid and Nebula looked at each other with disapproving looks. "I just know that bubble head is up to something and if she is" Nebula started as she made her pointer finger glow as if she was going to zap something (or in this case someone) and they looked over at Rad and Ko who were still with Citrus Twisty. "Oh! I wish-" Ko was then interrupted by Enid. "Hold up! You guys don't come from magic like me, so let me tell ya about taking wishes from strangers. There is always a gotcha" she explained as she got in between the boys and the soda genie. "A gotcha?" Nebula, Ko, and Rad asked. "Like a catch of some sort?" Nebula asked. "Yeah. Any colorful idioms, metaphors, puns, excreta can and will be used against you" Enid clarified. "Oh, is it possible to make a wish without an ironic twist?" Ko asked. "Not without a good contract" Enid answered.

They then wrote out a contract and they all signed it while Citrus Twisty lounged annoyed on a box with Nebula standing near her in case she decided to attack. "There! This specifies that the world in world peace means this world and not some other random planet" Enid said. "Wow! This contract makes my wish foolproof!" Ko said excitedly. "Wait. Ko's gotta say all that to get one wish? We already used our whole lunch break writing it and I'm starving" Rad said annoyed. "I'm sorry Rad" Ko apologized. "I'll go get all of us a snack or something then" Nebula said and she walked off. Once she walked off, Citrus Twisty perked up and smiled evilly at what Rad said.

Meanwhile, Nebula snuck out of the back door and she went to Burrito Beardo to get her and her friends some food. While she waited in line, she heard her phone ring. "Please don't be Gar, please don't be Gar, please don't be Gar" she mumbled to herself as she fished her phone out of her pocket. She checked the caller ID to see Bianca's name. "Mama Bi?" she asked herself before she answered her phone. "Hi Mama Bi. What's up? How are things?" she asked. "Everything is complicated to say the least" Bianca said. "How's the baby?" Nebula asked. "The baby is fine. Still not here but fine. Listen, if you ever see or know anything about someone named Professor Venomous please call me" Bianca said worriedly. "I will. I promise. I have to go now. I'll call you after work" Nebula said as the person in front of her in line was getting their order. "Okay. talk to you then. Xao Shi" Bianca said before Nebula hung up. "Hey Beardo" she greeted. "Ah Nebula! Good to see you. What would you like?" Beardo asked. Nebula then told him her order and she paid for it. Moments later he presented her with the bags of food and she graciously took the bags and walked back to the bodega.

"Guys! I'm back with the food!" Nebula called as she walked into the area where her friends were. "Holy Shnikes! Rad" she said both surprised and worriedly. She quickly put the bags down and she ran over to the now burger Rad and gently took him from Ko. "Can anyone tell me why my boyfriend's a blue hamburger?" she asked impatiently. "Easy, Ko wished for me to make his friend a burger so I did" Citrus Twisty explained with false sweetness. "Easy babe, you're starting to freeze me" Rad said. "Sorry hun"Nebula said as she loosed her grip on him a bit and she took a deep breath. "Turn him back!" Ko demanded. Citrus Twisty laughed evilly. "If you want that then you'll have to use another wish. But, you'll probably mess that one up too" she said with another evil laugh. She then appeared beside Ko in a smaller form. "What a nice contract you got here, it'd be a shame if someone got soda on it!" she said evilly as she rubbed the contract over herself. Enid quickly sent a fire kick at her to get her to stop. "You know, for a soda genie you aren't very sweet" Enid said. "Oh I was sweet once. Before I was imprisoned in this stockroom for years past my sell by date. So now it's time for my revenge on this bodega "Citrus Twisty said darkly before she then went back to the way she was.

She then snapped her fingers and Ko was trapped in one of her bubbles. "Go ahead Ko, wish for something. Anything! I dare you!" Citrus Twisty said with another laugh as she appeared next to him. She then began firing orange bubbles. Enid quickly grabbed Ko and Nebula who had Burger Rad and she brought them into the break room. "How can we get her to turn me back to normal?" Rad asked. "Magic like hers is weak to only one thing" Enid started to say. She then tugged out her outfit and revealed a lawyer outfit. "Lawsuits" Enid finished saying as she fixed her outfit. Nebula took out her phone with her free hand and tapped it. An ominous 'chung CHUNG' was heard.

"We're suing to get Rad turned back to normal and for damages" Enid declared. "You shut me in the back of the store so nobody could free me! I'll sue you for so many damages that I'll basically own Gar's myself" Citrus Twisty threatened. "All rise" the judge said and everyone stood up. "Please be seated" he said. "Why does he have an ear of corn?" Nebula whispered to Enid. Citrus Twisty the appeared before the judge and put one of her small hands on the corn. "Miss Twisty, do you swear to tell the truth? The whole ear of truth and not leave a kernel of truth out?" Judge Wally the White asked. "Yes sir" Citrus Twisty replied sweetly. "My people of the courtroom, please listen to this tale of injustice that befell this innocent genie" Citrus Twisty said. She then began to tell a false story of what happened from her point of view, purposely making it seem like Ko, Nebula, Rad, and Enid were the ones doing wrong.

Nebula began booing and Judge Wally the White pounded his gavel onto the small, circular block on his podium. "Order! Order!" he said. "You're butt's out of order!" Nebula replied angrily. "Can it Nebula" Enid yelled as she pulled at her arm to try and get her to sit down. "For the record, I regret nothing" Nebula said before sat back down. Citrus Twisty then began to fake cry. "My goodness! To think that this would happen to such a considerate little genie. What say you miss Enid? To Twisty's accusations to your client?" Judge Wally the White asked. "I'd say she's full of it! I demand to cross examine Citrus Twisty" Enid declared. Citrus Twisty then and Enid then glared at each other. Enid then began to ask the soda genie questions and they began to banter back and forth. Citrus Twisty brought up what Enid called Rad earlier. "We're finished" Enid said defeatedly. "Enid! You can't give up now!" Nebula said determinedly as she put a hand on her friend's back. "She's right! The fate of the bodega rests is your hands" Ko said. Enid lifted her head and she motioned over to Citrus Twisty. "Just look at her guys. Twisty's got the judge wrapped around her nubby little hands. She's a magical being with eons of knowledge ready to use against us. What do we have that could possibly stand up against that?" Enid questioned.

"Don't you worry Enid! Radicles has taken the stand" Rad said from the witness stand. Enid held her face in her hands while Nebula glared at Citrus Twisty. "How very intriguing. Radicles please recount your version of events"Judge Wally said as he stroked his beard. "With pleasure Sir Judge. I was just spending some quality chill time with my adoring girlfriend and coworkers when we suddenly found ourselves under attack by an evil genie" Rad said as he told a false story of what happened. Nebula and Enid face palmed as he told his story. "Wait Rad! You forgot about the part about her turning you into a burger" Ko reminded. "Oh yeah! Uh. I guess I got turned into a burger after that. The End" Rad said.

"Goodness, these stories are both so incredibly credible! I just don't know which one to believe! These conflicting accounts of events are giving me a rash oh mon" the judge said. He then looked around the courtroom to see if anyone got his joke. The room was silent. "Your honor. I know these two versions of of events seem a little far fetched. I understand where your indecision is coming from. However, I have someone here in this courtroom who simply can't tell a lie. I have a witness so honest that he would tell the truth even if it hurt him" Enid said as Nebula carried Rad back to where they previously were. "Uh Enid. I just went" Rad said. "Not you" Nebula said as she placed him down. "Obviously she means lil' old me" Twisty said. "It's obviously not you" Nebula said angrily.

"Who is this mystery witness? Won't somebody please tell me" the judge pleaded. "Holy Cob you guys. It's Ko. I call Ko to the stand" Enid declared. A spotlight was then shone on Ko as he approached the witness stand. Judge Wally then told Ko to tell him his version of what happened. "Yes your honor" Ko said. He then began to tell him what really happened. Citrus Twisty then approached him and she began to pester him and make him seem guilty. She then trapped Enid and Nebula in a giant soda bubble. Nebula used her powers to freeze the bubble and Enid sent a fire kick to break the bubble and hit Citrus Twisty. The three females then began to fight. The soda genie got a hold of Ko and he punched her. "Oh yeah? Well it's time for my rebuttal" Twisty said and she punched Ko. "Ko!" Nebula called worriedly as she ran to Ko to see if he was alright. She then helped him up and the two joined Enid in fighting the soda genie.

Judge Wally then sent a giant gavel down on them to get them to stop. "I've seen quite enough!" he declared angrily. "I sentence. Eenie meenie. Citrus Twisty to seventy years in prison" he said as he lowered his gavel. "Seventy years?!" Enid, Ko, Nebula, and Rad said in shock. "Seventy years?" Citrus Twisty asked as she was locked up in jail cell. "We just wanted her to change Rad back to his usual handsome self" Nebula pleaded " we didn't want her to go to jail" Ko said. "Sorry sonny, my hands are tied with these darn minimum sentencing laws" the judge said. "But it was a non violent offense" Enid declared. "Toodle loo" the judge said as he floated off. "Get back here!" Nebula called angrily as she chased after him. A while later she came back and Ko explained what happened with Citrus Twisty. Nebula sat on the ground and she stared sadly at Rad. She then let out a small laugh. "Well, I guess we all learned a very valuable lesson today" Nebula said. "What would that be?" Rad asked. Nebula turned to him and looked at his seriously as she spoke.

"Never let soda expire"

*Xao Shi (Sounds like X-ow-She) means "I love you" in a made up language for this story

For the sound Nebula's phone made, think of the Law and Order's sound effect

This chapter was so ironic considering I was drinking an orange soda as I wrote it and watched the episode

I also could not stop laughing when I was writing for Nebula 😂