Disclaimer I don't own Inuyasha Rumiko Takahashi and Viz Media do
IInuyasha's sadistic new joy is Halloween is hell for everyone else but when Kagome gives Inupapa special a treat the tables are turned on a certain holy terror. Miroku spies on a bathing beauty who's not quite what she seems. Inuyasha makes a new friend Daichi they share the same trouble making enemy and plot revenge, complete one shot. A/N I uploaded this Halloween day for you guys didn't see it tried couple times 0 it worked today Sorry. Written for Halloween 2020, lemon Inuyasha/Kagura, Sessh/Kag
Happy Freakin Halloween 3
By Raven2010
"Got your ballerina costume ready big bro?
"I am male imbecile and do not wear female attire, and trick or treating is for children fool," Sesshoumaru retorted
"Bet it's pink hah? You're already to go trick or treating now, try not to get guys to excited you know what a sexy wench you make better take some condoms with you just in case better safe than sorry" right?
"Well I guess that's better than what you're wearing for trick or treating,"
"Really fluffy do tell?" cocky Inuyasha was not prepared for what was to come
"A half naked wearing shorts with the ass cut out and bra as a top prostitute, ass-less gives the male or in your case line of males quick easy access and entry for doggy style riding. Now remember anything under ten dollars is robbery," Sesshoumaru had the hanyou by the balls and was thrilling knowing he did
"Cough," the tea Sugimi was drinking sprayed across the floor "Holy crap, is that really my eldest?,"
"Savage," Miroku exclaimed
"Sessh is the king," Kagome added
"Whoa dog breath has just been fire roasted," Kouga said "All we need now is the barbecue sauce,"
"Hey, you prick ten dollars I ain't cheap," Inuyasha griped
"Um he's worried about the ten dollars and not the ass-less shorts line of guys and doggy style riding," Shocked Sango chimed in
"Well dog breath always was slow," Kouga teased
"You will also wear a mask to hide your identity we do not need you bringing shame upon the Taisho family name," Sesshoumaru shot back
"Ten dollars" what do I look like a piece of cheap marked down meat in the bargain bin? Inuyasha snapped
"Ah Inuyasha your missing something," Ayame spoke
"Yeah like what wolfykins?
"Allow me," Miroku said "Sesshoumaru also mentioned ass-less shorts easy access for doggy style riding line of men," he paused "Wait for it," snow white faced Inuyasha frozen in shock was speechless for the first time in his long life then came out of his daze
"You son of a bitch" you'd pimp me out like a whore? And a ten dollar one at that" the hanyou yelled
"Click the light in the attic just came on," Sugimi wisecracked
"Watch this," Miroku said "I'll give you nine dollars and fifty cents for thirty minutes" will you bear my puppies?
"I'll pay eight bucks for an hour," Kouga needled "I want a litter,"
"I'll give ya a dollar for ninety minutes," Bankotsu added
"Well you know me Yashy my love is free," Jakotsu said
"Oh my gods you boys are ruthless and wicked beyond belief," Sugimi exclaimed
"See you are already receiving very generous offers and requests for pups," Sesshoumaru was brutal "You should be most honored,"
"Whaaaaat? First of all I ain't gay" got that? And you cheap bastards want dime store pussy un-fucking-believable," The irate hanyou snapped
"Well I'd give you fifty cents for an all niter but we're related so that's out," Sesshoumaru was one sadistic ball breaking dog
"Holy shit eldest is depraved," wide eyed rarely swears Sugimi exclaimed "Youngest may be scarred for life,"
"I think our hanyou bit off more than he can chew with Sesshoumaru this time," Kagome said to her female companions
"Oh Yashy I'll pay you ten cents if you let us girls watch," Ayame said
"Us too," Kagura, Sango and Kagome added
"What you wenches too? In shock eyes impossibly huge Inuyasha replied
"Yes I'm wet just thinking about it," Sango answered
"That's it I'm out you bastards are pervertedly insane, I need triple strength demon sake demon catnip reefer and dogweed, yeah lots of it will help," the shell shocked hanyou then took off running at warp speed "But first brain bleach and a scrub brush,"
"Sesshoumaru you are deranged and a sick dog your depravity knows no limits,"
"Father he did start it,"
"Touche my boy touche," Sugimi teased bowing
Next morning
"Inuyasha I'm killing you," voices broke the silence attracting the attention of all in the home
"What the hell? Bankotsu exclaimed
"That's the girls and they sound extra pissed," Bankotsu said
"Wonder what did the mutt do now?
"Ten cents to watch hah, wenches?" the gloating hanyou replied
"Oh lord what have you done? Sugimi who had just jumped out of bed and came running to see what was going on asked
"Nothin popsy,"
"You ruined them you murderer," the females wailed
"Uh oh" why do I feel a homicide coming? Jakotsu asked
Sugimi ran headed for the large room the girls were sharing "Girls what happened?
"Look Inupapa he killed them they died to young and never got to go out and have fun," Kagome practically cried
"Yeah they were minding their own business and he committed mass murder," Sango said
"Show me," Sugimi said they held up their what were pretty panties the backs were cut out in the shape of a heart the same was done to they're bra cups where the nipples go "Inuyashaaaaa,"
"What? They liked ass-less shorts on me so I thought they would want to join in plus the new bra design will keep their nipples cool on hot days"
"They were innocent and helpless, I am going to slice your precious jewels off with my claws," Ayame yelled
"Then I'm going to make a cock knocker aka door knocker out of them and mount it on the front door," Kagome snapped "It will be a unique one of a kind no one else in the neighborhood has one,"
"Ouch" the cringing males exclaimed
"Ah the females are in homicide mode it will be interesting and fun to see how the cretin survives murderous female wrath," gloating Sesshoumaru exclaimed
"Yeah mutt went too far this time," Kouga added
"RIP Yashy I'll miss you," Jakotsu said
"Let me get my weapon," Seething Sango snapped
"Girls calm down I have an idea," Sugimi whispered
"I will after I dissect a certain hanyou," Kagura bit
"Be calm ladies Inupapa has a most wicked idea, but first do me a favor,"
"Anything for you Inupapa,"
"Good, go after and chase him as you usually would that will give me a chance and time to retrieve our weapon from his room,"
"Hehehe you got it most honored dog father," sadistically grinning Sango replied
In Inuyasha's room "Got it," Sugimi said
Downstairs
"I suggest you run Puppy Toes oops I mean vermin," Sesshoumaru wisecracked
Inuyasha growled at the nickname "Pffft as if I ain't scared of wenches, bored now going for a walk toodles bitches," Inuyasha replied and left walking fast
"Father what are you? Sesshoumaru stopped when he saw what was between his father's fingers in the hand he was waving from side to side "Oh dear sire of mine this will bust little brothers balls better and harder than they have ever been busted before, I praise thee mighty king of evil," and bowed
"Aw Sesshy your so cute I must get you a treat," pinching Sesshoumaru's cheek Sugimi teased
"Aw shucks your gonna make me blush," turning one foot from side to side evilly smiling Sesshoumaru replied
"Be back in a bit boys got to round up the girls, oh and don't burn my house down while I'm gone," he joked then disappeared in a ball of light
"Hahaha mutts going to shit bricks and have a litter when he sees what's coming,"
"Wolf I can hardly wait,"Jakotsu said
"Neither can I," the others chimed in
3 Days later
"Inuyasha" Sugimi called
"Yeah what?
"You have mail,"
"If it ain't a check I don't want to know about it," the smart ass hanyou replied
"It is cretin, now get down here or I'll cash it myself wow I can buy a lot with this," Sesshoumaru needled
"Do and die you stinking fur ball," bolting down the stairs Inuyasha shot back "Fork it over Rover," he said one hand extended
"Here vile creature,"
"Oh shit don't know how I'm going to keep a straight face," Kouga whispered to his friends
Excited Inuyasha eagerly opened the envelope pulling out the papers inside "Here we go boys," Miroku said in a low voice
The hanyous eyes went impossibly wide "Whaaaaaaat three thousand dollars?"
"Yes you got three thousand dollars why one would think you'd be ecstatic," playing dumb Sesshoumaru said
"It's not a check ass-hat it's a credit card bill I haven't used it somebody hacked my account," he snapped then started reading "Suki's Silks boutique that place is expensive they charge sixty dollars for one bra and the same for panties a nighty costs eighty dollars. Some dick is trying to impress his girl at my expense,"
"Wearing women's lingerie little brother I am shocked but I do not judge some males have strange fetishes," Sesshoumaru needled
"Bet he looks gorgeous in a red hot pink trimmed camisole," Jakotsu needled "Oh and with that luscious silver mane he's so sexy I could just die,"
"Keep it up Pandora and you will die," Inuyasha bit then continued reading the list "Undies bra's, wait a minute could it? Nah couldn't be" right?
"Any second now," Miroku said
"In five four three two on," Kouga was cut off
"Wencheeeees? He called out "Oh my little wenchys," Inuyasha continued
Ayame came down the stairs "Yeeeees"
"Did you girls have anything to do with this? He asked waving the bill
"Dunno" Kagome who had just arrived said
"Ah hah, well hate to bust your bubble but it's all going back so pack up the goodies and I'll take em back to Suki's Silks boutique,"
"Like hell you will," Sango snapped "You hacked all of our panties and bras one pair would have been bad enough but no you did all ten pairs I had with me,"
"And I never got to wear the new ones I had with me," Kagome bit
"Yeah Kaggy same for me," Kagura and Ayame added
"Pup of mine,"
"Yeah what, ya old geezer?' came the hanyous wiseass reply
"I am the one who did it," Sugimi told him
"You what?"
"You heard me you butchered their things so you owed them and only the best for my girls, no use in calling the credit card company,"
"Yeah well I'm gonna surveillance cameras will prove I wasn't there hehehe," Inuyasha cockily replied
"Really? Sorry to disappoint" Sugimi paused for dramatic affect "Hi I'm Inuyasha Taisho," turned into him Sugimi said
"Bastard used transformation abilities to turn into me,"
"Yes we also made a little discovery while you were gone you cut the back side out of your brother's favorite suit pants the same as the girls panties mine and the other males as well," Sugimi reminded
"Well you fuckers all thought the ass-less shorts was funny," the hanyou snapped
"Yes but did we slaughter your panties and clothes? No" Miroku shot back
"Panties? I don't wear girls things perv but I bet you do" hah? Inuyasha bit "Explains a lot,"
"It's very early but let me be the first to wish you Happy freakin Halloween lil bro," Sesshoumaro was enjoying it too much
"Thank you Yashy we love you all's forgiven," the girls cooed
"Have you learned your lesson? Dear brother" Sesshouaru needled
"No worries we're even now," came Inuyasha's creepily calm reply then he left
"Oh shit he's up to no good," Bankotsu exclaimed
"Yep no ranting cussing promises of death and destruction mutts definitely up to something really bad," Kouga added
Two days later
The next two days were quiet everyone was on guard they all decided to go to a Halloween haunted fun house for some fun Inuyasha was the only one who didn't go. The gang spent most of the day at the haunted house ate treats had a good time and hung out by the time they returned it was bed time. They looked around no Inuyasha then spotted a note on the table
Met this really hot girl dressed as a vampire
Shacking up for a couple days
Later losers lol
Inuyasha
"That's dog breath always a smartass," grinning Kouga said
"Maybe after getting some he won't be so cranky," Miroku joked
"Naaaaah" the others exclaimed
After bathing some hot tea and a snack everybody headed off to bed they easily drifted off into a deep relaxing sleep. 3am ring, ring, ring a loud blasting alarm rang followed by shrieks of the startled people it had woke up then ear piercing screams filled the home. It was brutal torture and hell on earth
"I'll kill him," they all screamed
Yes our loving hanyou rigged water sprinklers that when the alarm went off they got sprayed with ice cold water bed and all. This topped every one of Inuyasha's past wicked pranks and revenge then a voice was heard
"Heard you suckers were hot and knew this would cool you down your welcome" Now who's gonna be servicing men for ten bucks a pop? Not me don't forget the lube"
"Inuyasha" they all bellowed
"Oh I've got a couple things you'll never forget," seething Kagome said "Wait for it dog,"
5 Days later
The hell hanyou returned silently gloating everyone acted as if nothing had happened "Welcome home cretin" all humped out are we? Sesshoumaru did his usual needling
"Yeah I snagged some pelt so,"
"I hope you oiled it's skin or the fur will fall out," the elder replied
"Later masturbater oops I mean fluffinater," Inuyasha retorted then headed up the stairs
"As you wish squirmin vermin,"
"Inuyasha" a familiar voice called from his room he entered his room "Close the door," he did "Your always bragging come show me what you got,"
"Kagura,"
"The one and only,"
"Oh I've got something to show you, you asked for it," his voice wa sexy mixed with cockiness he climbed in bed "Hey you are an eager little minx" aren't you? He said when her hand went down his pants "That's it wench your ass is mine I always liked you hot stuff,"
"Hold on a sec sexy I gotta go pee," she cooed
"Now?
"I was waiting for you all day hoping you'd come home, promise I'll be quick,"
"Okay but bring your hot little ass back soon" he quickly stripped and got back under the covers he felt her get back in "Welcome back now where were we?" The lights suddenly came on bright "Son of a, what the fuck? Jakotsu I'm about to gut you"
"Okay I'm out," he jumped off the bed "Yashy why are you so cruel? Jakotsu could win awards for his acting skills
"Where's Kagura?
"I traded places with her," Jakotsu replied
Then the additional surprise "Ahhhhhhhhh" a scream loud enough to wake the dead broke the silence as ice cold sprinkler water drenched him
He heard a click then
"Knew you were hot and that this would cool you off your welcome poky," Sugimi's and the others voices came from the tape playing in his stereo, then they sang
Happy, happy Halloween we're so glad you could make the scene you drama queen
Even though like a girl you scream we know your panties you did cream
We know right now you are mad but it really isn't all that bad
"Bastaaaaards"
Special treat
The next day
"Hi Inupapa for you," Kagome said handing the dog general a package
He took one long deep sniff "Ahhh, is this what I think it is?"
"Yup made em myself," Kagome answered
"Ohhhhhhh shit," Kouga exclaimed
"What did your briefs twist pinching your man jewels? Wiseass Kagura needled
"No windy" Don't you know?
"Sniff" Sesshoumaru's eyes widened "Hehehe oh this is going to be the best October ever," he smiled evilly "Miko you Demoness,"
"Kaggy tell me you didn't," Bankotsu said
"What I just gave our Inupapa a gifty,"
"Oh dear lord," Ayame exclaimed
"What special brownies with reefer demon catnip and dogweed the inu version of human reefer only strong enough to get an elephant high, made it with my own two little hands," evilly smiling Kagome replied "And something extra,"
"Something extra? The others asked
"A lovely bottle of demon sake the extra strong one to go with Inupapa needs something to drink with it he'll be thirsty after eating a few," the innocent looking miko told them
"Miko, do you realize what you have done? Sesshoumaru said
"Why yes, yes I do got us tons of revenge on our inu-weasel aka Inuyasha hehehe,"
"See boys this is why you stay on the female genders good side," Jakotsu chimed in
"With the extra strength sake added to it little brother is in for three weeks of pure hell happy freakin Halloween little bro the best one in history hehehe,"
"Yes it will make up for our hell-hanyous sick pranks on us,"
"Kagome you are the queen of evil," the others praised bowing
"Aw come on you spoil me,"
Sugimi almost leaped with joy when he found not one but three dozen brownies "And extra strength demon sake to go with haven't had that in a long time, I love our miko to pieces,"
"Sniff, father is enjoying his treat rest in peace little brother," gloating Sesshoumaru said
"Nah Sessh it's rest in pieces," Kouga chimed in
"Miko, would you walk with me please?
"Ah okay," she looked him over while following him 'He is so flipping hot' she thought "Sesshoumaru what the hell?
"Sesshy has a special thank you for you,"
Lemon starts
"Uh oh," she was pinned between him and a wall in a large storage closet "Hey my clothes you rabid dog,"
Her clothes lay shredded on the floor "Not to worry there is a whole new wardrobe for you in my room that is where you will be staying," he purred in her ear
"Oh shit," she groaned when he entered her while holding her up against the wall "How did you get your clothes off so fast?
"Shredded on the floor with yours," he replied "Gods damn you're so tight and wet I knew you wanted me,"
"Oh yes," she moaned "How are we going to leave without clothes?
Using his powers he made his feudal era clothes appear and female attire from the same era "Our Halloween outfits," he said
"I always wanted to do it with you while you were wearing them,"
"You did? next thing he was in them with his hakama down
"Oh yes my fantasy come true,"
"You are three times more aroused we will be doing this again but in the woods like in the feudal era," He felt her tighten at the thought of it and kept moving
"Holy crap we're in the woods, what the?" she exclaimed finding her back now against a tree instead of the wall
"I did tell I had a special thank you for you" didn't I? He teased keeping her in place he turned around and sat with his back against a tree "Ride me woman,"
"Ah, best thank you ever," she groaned
She did the damn began to burst and his fangs plunged into her neck as her transformation began she bit him powers swirled around them like a tornado coiling around each other combining. The blast of power that erupted from the combination was like a million fireworks simultaneously going off lighting the area around them. Their renewed lust drove them as the mating frenzy began before she knew it she was rolled onto her back her mate drilling into her like a jackhammer
Lemon continues
Later that day
"Now, now pop you don't want to do this" do you? Come on old man you can't be serious" cringing Inuyasha said
"Hold still my boy don't be such a wuss," Sugimi replied
"Bullshit easy for you to say you aren't the one who has a loony stoned mutt trying to put gods damned muzzle on him" now are ya?
"It's puppy training day wee ride the doggy" yes? The elder replied
"Sniff son of a" which one of you lousy sadistic pricks gave him special brownies?
"What are you on about? Feigning indignity Kagome answered
"Don't give me that crap wench, now I'll only repeat myself one time" which one of you pricks gave him special brownies? And not the regular ones with just weed also added demon catnip and dogweed plus extra strength demon sake"
"How would I know? Inupapa is a full grown dog maybe he felt like having a snack"
"Yeah what she said now let's play, come on dog breath I'm booooored," stoned Sugimi said "Come on come on,"
"Snack my ass wench three weeks I'm in for three weeks of hell," the hanyou bit "And see he's talking like the mangy wolf this is really bad, come on Kagome I'm being serious here,"
"Oh brother quit being a drama queen he can't be that bad," the miko replied
"Bullshit he is that bad and way worse,"
"Oops be right back gotta go to the little doggy's room," Sugimi exclaimed
"Sweet he's gone I can make a break for it," Inuyasha said breathing a sigh of relief
Buzz, buzz, buzzzzz "Hi my puppy," giddy with happiness Sugimi spoke
"No oh no you get away from me you loony old goat,"
"Come here my wittle puppy," buzz, buzzzzz
"Not that bad hah? Now he's trying to shave my head with the friggin electric clippers, first the muzzle now this," the indignant hanyou snapped
"Come on it is doggy grooming time," Sugimi taunted buzzzzz "I can do it quick if you want but I can't promise it will look as good like sex slower is better, hm cut in layers you'll look like a rock star,"
"Oh no, Kagomeeeee damn you I know you did this evil wench," he yelled while running from his father
"Hold still ya sissy it won't hurt a bit and you'll look so cute and fabulous after come here papa knows what he's doing, girls love a well groomed dog we all know you love females" right?
After they were gone
"Damn stoned Inupapa is fun," Ayame said
"Yes girls we've got to get him high more often," Kagura added
"Sisters we found our ultimate indestructible weapon stoned Sugimi," Sango teased
"Inupapa rules," they all praised
"Sniff, Kagome your mated you and Sesshy eh," Ayame teased nudging the miko with one elbow "Congrats"
"Mate we have unfinished business," Sesshoumaru called Kagome ran to him they disappeared in his light ball
"Hahaha Inuyasha was so rattled he didn't scent the change yet," Kagura exclaimed
"Oh I can hardly wait until he bugs Kagome and meets the inu miko fangs claws and all," Bankotsu chimed in
"Daaaaad help," Kouga said imitating Inuyasha's voice perfectly
"Wolf you are creepy sometimes," Jokotsu teased
"I know right? The laughing wolf replied
Dream girl
"Monk again seriously?" Sango scolded the in letch overdrive mode monk
"But she is so hot a temptress,"
"A tree that even remotely resembles a female form is a temptress to you,"
"But that luscious hair past her bottom and that body," Miroku gushed
"Um you do realize she is a demon right?'
"Sango my love human demon who cares I never discriminate love knows no limits,"
"In your case lechery is love," she needled
"But look at her" can you blame me? He tried
"If she catches you hiding in the bushes watching while she bathes she may gut you and make a nice monk pouch out of your hide. Well on the up side ladies butts would be forever safe,"
"Silver hair body of a goddess and I bet a luscious bosom as well,"
"Oh I give up your an incurable letch," Sango scolded "I'll dig a grave for you in the woods it shouldn't be long now," she headed back toward the house
"Hey Sango what the hell's going on? Inuyasha asked while looking out of the kitchen window
"See where the biggest tree near the river bank is,"
"Yeah" the curious hanyou answered
"Look past it over to the right," he did
"Holy shit," Inuyasha exclaimed "An inu demoness oh I can't wait," then an idea hit him
"Inuyasha don't you dare,"
"What I'm only going to make sure she knows he's spying so if she kills him a little than that's just gravy on the meat,"
"She's a demon eventually she will scent him then," Sango replied
"Got ya, then slaughter," the hanyou was mentally gloating "Sniff, wait I know her oh he is so screwed hahaha" should I dig a grave for him? I mean it is the least I can do for the poor perverted bastard"
"Nah when she takes dog form she'll do it in two seconds," Sango replied
"Yep then pee on his grave," Inuyasha exclaimed "Water the flowers we dogs are through hehehe," Sango laughed
With Miroku and the demoness
Miroku decided to take a chance he stealthily came out from behind the bushes and slowly approached her "Pardon me mi lady would you mind if I joined you?
"Sniff"
"Is that a yes? Does my scent displease you?
"Ahhh" she was pissed
"May I have a look? If the front is as beautiful as the back I may faint from the overwhelming beauty" he said
"Hah"
He slowly approached walking around to face her and was greeted with the most gorgeous pair of gold eyes he'd ever seen they started turning copper "Gulp"
"Growl"
'Run Miroku run' he thought then ran and finally made it back inside
"Yo monk what's with you finally looked in the mirror for the first time and the horror was too much for you? Inuyasha needled
"Yeah look the perv is whiter than snow," Kouga added
"He looks scared" What is going on here did someone threaten you? Bankotsu asked
"No, um it's noth nothing I, I I've got to go," Miroku stammered
A ball of light stopped in front of him and a figure formed "Look it's his dream girl from the river," Inuyasha said
"I, I, I I'm sorry," the fear filled monk managed to get out
Red glowing halo like light surrounded the figure burning rage could be felt "Uh oh," Jakotsu exclaimed
"Oh boy someone is about to die," Sugimi said
"Rest in pieces monk," Inuyasha wisecracked "Sniff I'll miss you," he added wiping away fake tears
"Please forgive me I didn't know?" Miroku pled everyone waited
"Monk your blood will stain the floors this day," yes it was none other than Sesshoumaru "My claws have your name written all over them," he flexed his green glowing claws
"What is going on? Sugimi and the others asked
"It seems while I was bathing our lecherous about to die peeping Tom monk mistook me for a woman,"
"Greetings, what's it like being princess of the Western lands?" Inuyasha could not resist
"Little brother after I dispatch the monk you are next,"
"Well I was talking to monk passion pants but if you want to be the woman in the relationship I don't judge, damn some males have the weirdest fetishes,"
"Wait you knew it was Sesshoumaru the whole time and didn't tell me," Sango grouched
"What? And spoil the surprise" Inuyasha replied "That would'a ruined the whole thing and the look on your face priceless wouldn't miss that for the world,"
"Dirty dog," Sango shot back
"I know papa understands," Inuyasha replied gently pinching one of her cheeks
The next day
"Inuyasha give them back," Kagome snapped
"You tempt the dog he takes the bone,"
"Yeah but those aren't bones they are Halloween cookies that I worked hard to make for the party," she replied
"Too bad they are all mine now you know the old saying possession is nine tenths of the law,"
"Yes and murder is one hundred percent legal in your case," she tried again to get the stolen cookies back
"Boys he is about to meet the new girl," Bankotsu whispered
"Sweet, keep pissing her off I can't wait to see it," Kouga said
"Bow wow chomp," Miroku added
"Bye, bye my sweet puppy," Jakotsu exclaimed
"Growl"
"What the hell? Puzzled Inuyasha said
"Give them back or die nooooow," the usually calm miko bellowed in a voice that seemed not to be her own
"Kagome what the fuc? He was cut off
"You were warned,"
"Any second now boys and girls," Sugimi exclaimed
"I will kill youuuuu," Kagome stared murderous rage burning in her turning copper gold eyes then it happened
"Shit" what the hell? Hey I know those stripes their Sesshoumaru's and his crescent moon give them back"
"No shit Sherlock took ya long enough" what was your first clue? Kouga needled
"Is your nose broken brother or did it run away from home? Sesshoumaru teased
"Congrats son," Sugimi added
"Yeah I like them so Sesshoumaru let me borrow em," Kagome wisecracked
"Mated Sesshoumaru you," he stammered unable to form complete sentences
"Duh, now about my cookies," the now sadistically grinning miko replied fangs showing flexing her claws "You know I am rather hungry I know it's against inu youkai law and all that but damn inu steaks seem really yummy right now in fact my mouth is watering just thinking about it hm butt steaks is where all the flavor is,"
"Me eat you," inuyasha stammered "Hey you're a dog now that's cannibalism,"
"We don't mind," Sugimi, Sesshoumaru, Ayame and Kouga simultaneously added
"Poor girl's been working hard all day really works up an appetite" know what I mean? Kouga was enjoying the hanyous distress
"Cannibalism shmanibalism potato tomato who cares it's all food and I'm hungry," Kagome replied
"Here's your cookies back," the hanyou said handing them back to her "Geez want to eat a guy for loving your treats,"
"In your case theft is love, your logic is severely flawed," she responded "Now where were we?
"Hey I gave em back dammit wench you still want to eat me?"
"Sure why not?" she was just screwing with him
A thought entered Inuyasha's twisted mind 'So you want to play that way hah?' he thought "I'm hungry too in fact starving" guess what I want to eat? He taunted licking his lips "Special meat especially topped with whipped cream down the middle delish,"
"Wha what? She gasped
"Yeah my tongue is getting a boner just thinking about it," the Inuyasha hellhound was back and taking prisoners
"Whipped cream meat special," yes it was her turn to stammer and he was loving it
"Yeah babes tell me only my tongue is second only to my penis,"
"Am I actually hearing this from my youngest? Sugimi exclaimed
"I'd kill him if he was being serious," Sesshoumaru said "But you must admit it is hilarious" is it not father?
"Holy shit I didn't think mutt could get any worse than he already was," Kouga said
Kagome snapped out of her shock induced daze "You dirty dog,"
"I think she actually forgot she could sit him," Sango whispered to the others they nodded in agreement
"What? Nothing wrong with keeping it in the family" Inuyasha continued
"Keep it in the family," the raging miko bit "I've got a family to keep it in for you ten members in fact," she said
flexing her claws
"Well I'm tired gonna go grab a nap later losers," he casually said in a bored tone then exited through the back door entrance
"Get back here you wimp and die like a man,"
"Sorry wench can't die like a man I'm a girl," Inuyasha replied then started running at top speed with a raging miko hot on his heels
"Well looks like our hanyou got the chase he so badly wanted," Moroku said they all broke out in gut busting laughter
"Father, are you sure little brother didn't get hold of some of your special brownies? Sesshoumaru asked
"As much as I'd love to blame the brownies I believe that that's all Inuyasha,"
The following morning
"I'm singing in the rain, I'm singing in the rain soon I'll be happy and clean again," Inuyasha sang while strolling across the living room floor with a two foot wrench partly held over one shoulder headed toward the basement
"Inuyasha what the hell are you? Kagome started but was cut off
"Oh good morning my lovely wenches," then cast his gaze upon the males "And you to ya mangy mutts,"
"I'm a thoroughbred thank you so much," Kouga and Sesshoumaru sarcastically shot back
"Yeeeees I know thoroughbred jock straps," the hanyou replied "Got to go now things to fix people to kill you know the usual," and left
"Him singing so happy like he just won a million dollars," Jakotsu exclaimed
"Uh oh this is bad," Bankotsu added
"Let's wait it out and see what happens might be funny as hell," Kouga said "Sniff, hey does anybody smell tha? He was cut off before he could finish
"Ahhhhhhh"
"Inupapa are you alright what happened? The females asked in unison
A ball of light landed on the first floor just below the staircase "Has anyone seen my lovely pup? Soaking wet wearing only sweat pants Sugimi asked he was smiling like an angel though seething with rage
"I'm one hundred percent demon but he is creeping me out so bad right now," Kouga whispered to Sesshoumaru
"You are not alone wolf, but the perks are one if father kills little brother this will be a one pup home two it will fulfill my lifelong dream of being an only son,"
"Good point big dog," the grinning wolf replied they waited and listened
In the basement
"Had your fun did you son? Sugimi sweetly asked while menacingly approaching Inuyasha
"What are you talking about old man I was just fixing a loose pipe?"
"Sugimi's eyes looked up "The pipe to the bathroom in my room you're so thoughtful always looking out for me,"
"Um thank you I guess," Inuyasha replied
"Did you know you nearly froze my jewels off, boys are you alright? Looking down his pants Sugimi asked
"Think about it now you have a stiffy you can get a woman to warm your boys with her twenty four seven heated cave,"
"By turning off the hot water to my bathroom? I never once did anything to harm or jeopardize the health and safety of your tube steak and sweet rolls" Now have I?
"But you tried to muzzle me shave my head and torture me in every way possible after eating those godsdammned special brownies even though I hadn't done anything rotten to you," Inuyasha reminded
"So you are proud of freezing my man pipe off uh kay,"
"Nooooo" the hanyou shrieked when faster than the speed of light Sugimi had him in a headlock
Inside Sugimi's ball of light they rose up through the living room floor and materialized "Now my boy let me reward you for your loving kindness,"
Inuyaha soon found himself stripped down to his underwear "I'm freezing," he wailed
To quote you my boy toodles bitch," Sugimi was still stoned from his treat for every one prank played on him he played three on the pranker "Later kiddies I must finish my shower," the dog general said
Everyone one immediately headed to the kitchen finding Inuyasha inside the walk in freezer "Wow Inupapa really wants to preserve his meat," Ayame joked "Sniff is that what I think it i? She started to ask
"That's what I was trying to tell you guys I smelled Sugimi's special brownies plus sake on dog breath," Kouga told them
"So the little weasel is stoned," Kagome said
"Which means they being the two most sick humored dogs in history the battle will be unending until the special brownies wear off or till one kills the other," grinning Sesshoumaru exclaimed
"Entertainment right in my price range free," Miroku added
"It's war now get ready folks Sugimi will have another one lined up real soon," laughing Bankotsu joked
Round 2
"Eew mutt are ya trying to kill us? Kouga asked one hand over his nose
"Inuyasha go do that in the bathroom," Kagome scolded
"My eyes are burning," Jakotsu added
"Oh please like you wimps never farted before," Inuyasha paused "But something's wrong,"
"Yes you releasing rank biohazard farts," Bankotsu exclaimed
"We love you Yashy but no lovin till you clean out your pipe," Ayame, Kagura, and Sango needled
"I'm serious you idiots something is wrong" what if I'm dying and don't know it and this is a warning?
"What did you eat eight days old rotting meat? Cause that is not normal" Miroku stated
"I ate the same thing you morons ate," The hanyou griped
"This has Inupapa written all over it hehehe," Sango whispered to her female companions the others nodded in agreement and laughed very low
"Thanks for nothing traitors," Inuyasha bit "But what the hell's going on? Wait a minute" he was cut off
"Hello my favorite pup" did you enjoy your favorite strawberry milkshake as much as I enjoyed making it for you? sadistically smiling Sugimi asked
"You stinking flea bag you put something in it didn't you?"
"Who me? The elder replied
"Yeah you, now fess up you miserable old goat before I shred you like cheese,"
"Ooooo I'm so scared the puppy is going to beat me up," Sugimi taunted knowing he hated being called puppy
"Start making funeral plans genius," said Inuyasha flexing his claws
"Okay fine if you must know it's my very own concoction made it with love and my own two little hands certain herbs that cause farting one of them makes the rank smell" there happy now? Nosy thing you"
'Iiiiiiil kill you," the younger yelled
"I'm so scared not," Sugimi was gloating and proud of himself "Later kiddies got things to do now," he casually strolled away
"Little brother lesson learned the hard way never freeze a dogs log with ice cold water when he's bathing,"
"Screw you Sesshoumaru,"
"No worries my mate does that for me regularly and frequently," the others busted out laughing
Inuyasha was in revenge mode his evil mind focused on his target "I'll teach that prick a lesson he'll never forget,"
Later
"Lay on your back and let Kaggy ride,"
"Do with me what you will," Sesshoumaru replied then heard click "What the hell is this damned thing?
"Um Sesshoumaru I hate to say this but it looks like a chastity belt,"
"A chastity belt you say,"
"Sessh you are so calm it's creepy and smiling that's just outright scary,"
"Say cheese bastard," Inuyasha was heard at the same time a bright flash of light temporarily blinded Sesshoumaru
"Growl, INUYASHA," Kagome bellowed drawing the attention of the others in the home
"Oh shit forgot you were here, sorry my favorite sister wench in law," he tried conning
"Sorry not yet but you soon will be," the miko glared daggers "Rigged the bed so when my mate laid down a chastity belt locked onto him and you even had the nerve to take a picture. I hope you made your will because your about to die dog,"
"Mate" Kagome turned her head Sesshoumaru whispered something in her ear
"Oh ya forgot about that," using her miko powers she touched the lock making it open
"Now dear brother allow me to reward you," Sesshoumaru said sadistic delight dancing in his eyes
"Oh great wench is a walking talking key," Inuyasha grouched
"Sessh don't kill him all the way leave some for me so I can kill him a little later on,"
"Yes my miko I promise I will,"
"Oh crap," Inuyasha gasped then took off
"Did you hear that a chastity belt? Kouga asked
"The boy really wants to die" Sugimi said
Inuyasha's claim
He had been constantly thinking about that day in bed with Kagura when her hand went down his pants feeling his buddy harden and how Jakotsu ruined it by replacing his dream girl. He had plans and was about to do something about it before his other half killed him
"Hey hot stuff got a sec?
"Sure okay," Kagura replied and followed him "What's up?
"Well it seems you owe me and I mean owe me big time," he replied wearing the sneakiest most cocky grin history
"Owe you? I didn't rob you or borrow money" she wisecracked
"You do remember what you did in my room right?
"I have no idea what you're talking about,"
"Really my hotness? Let me refresh your lost memory" his hand went right to her crotch massaging a certain spot "Remember anything yet? He taunted
"Uh ahh I can't thi think gods," she stammered he upped his torture "Pants m my hand down ahhh grab,"
"Grabbed what? He knew he had her half insane but wanted to torture her
"Your oh shit," she nearly came "Yo your dog, dog log,"
"Ah hah,"
In the other room
"Mutt is merciless," grinning Kouga exclaimed
"Well he is a professional he's lain more pipe than a plumber," Sugimi joked
"The drill master two thousand, eh?" Bankotsu added
"Well to be fair he was about to play gynecologist and check Kagura's plumbing when we sprung that wicked prank on him," Sesshoumaru said "Aw big dog looks like your about to become an Inupapa in law again,"
"Finally, I thought I was going to have to mail order mates for you boys," Sugimi grinned when he heard a low indignant growl
Then an idea hit Sesshoumaru "Hm now that you mention it Inuyasha and I were thinking of doing the very same for you, you know letting that pipe rust from nonuse is bad for your health,"
"I hate you brats, you leave my pipe alone he's minding his own business and not bothering you,"
Back with Inuyasha and Kagura
"You um," she couldn't finish sentences
"Yes tell doctor Yashy all about it,"
"Room bed now hurts," she gasped
"Bedroom now you say" aw is my hot stuffs little motor overheating and about to catch on fire? He was a sexual sadist
Lemon starts
"That's it damn you," she bit reached down his pants he groaned when she returned the torturous groping "Now we are going to finish this refuse to relieve me and die,"
"Okay but remember you asked for it, you won't be walking for the next three days" he replied
He swiftly put her over his shoulder unable to wait to get to his room he headed for the nearest room which was the laundry room. His primitive side took over her clothes were gone so fast she could not believe his speed faster than the speed of light he held her up slid inside she immediately climaxed he began thrusting upward. Kagura soon found herself on top of the washing machine which was still running through a cycle the vibration heightening her lust
"Inuyasha, ahhh," he stifled an about to be released scream with his lips on hers "Hmmmm," she groaned he pulled back
"Damn woman you came the second I entered you and drenched him," he looked into her lust filled red eyes turning violet with passion "Ooo the wetter the better, shit I knew you would be hot in bed,"
"Go as hard as you want my sexy dog,"
"Like that? He asked after thrusting hard "The washing machine vibrating through you is driving me insane it's like I'm doing it with a vibrator and vagina combined in one," and squeezed her ass "Oh we are so doing this a lot more,"
"Inuyasha,"
"Hang on babe I'm right there with ya," it began fangs pierced each other's necks the bright glow of their powers combining tore through the first floor
Lemon continues
With the others
"Mutts officially married," Kouga teased
"Um Sesshoumaru," Kagome called
"Yes?"
"He just mated Kagura so you know they inherited some of each other's powers" Right?
"Your point is? His eyes widened after thinking about it
"He can fly now," the others chimed in
"Oh the chases will be more challenging and fun to watch," Sugimi needled
"Vermin I hate you," Sesshoumaru replied
"Yes I know I love you too," the group busted out laughing Sesshoumaru growled
Inuyasha being a dog of his word kept Kagura busy after she could barely walk. When he came down to get food to bring to his room he wore the biggest pride filed shit eating grin his friends and family were grinning like mad
"What? He exclaimed "Did I forget to put pants on?
"Is my daughter in law still alive? Sugimi asked
"What do you think? Came the smartass hanyous reply
"It lives and can still walk," Kouga, Miroku and the other males teased
"Zip it ya bunch of nosy perverted freaks," Inuyasha shot back
"Yashy,"
"Yes my favorite wenches?
"Congrats"
"Thanks girls, you mutts could learn class and manners from them," looking at the males Inuyasha needled
"Ah get up there and do your job," Bankotsu retorted
"You all forgot something," Jakotsu chimed in
"Like what? They all asked
"It's Halloween," he replied
"Happy freakin HallHoneymoonOween," Kouga exclaimed
"Shit forgot it was, hm got hitched on my favorite holiday sweet,"
"Bring my sister in law down the party is about to start," Sesshoumaru said
"Yes captain cranky Franky," Inuyasha answered
"Get a move on tricky Ricky has a broken dicky," Sesshoumaru shot back
"Their back to normal I see," Sugimi said "The snipe fest continues,"
Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru, Sugimi and the other males wore their feudal era clothes as costumes the females wore outfits from the same time period. "Well I see you can still fit into your hakama and haori," Sesshoumaru started the ball rolling
"Surprised you can get into yours fluffy after all you have gotten thick over the years," Inuyasha retorted
"Mine is all muscle yours is from over indulgence in junk food,"
"Been feasting on that special pie well on the upside it's fat free except for the whipped cream you put down the middle," he shot back giving Sesshoumaru a perverted wink
"Yours is topped with ice cream and butter cream cake frosting that is far more fattening than mine,"
"Alright you two perverted cretins the party guests will be arriving soon so put a lid on it," Sugimi said
"Yes mom," they replied
"Yo Sessh wanna have a race later?
"You want to try out and test your new flying abilities?
"You know it," Inyyasha replied
"Hm I am rather curious myself, tell you what let's have a race to the candy store I know you'll be eager for that sweet fang, plus we can get other goodies,"
"Need to stalk up on whipped cream for your special pie eh? Better buy a crate" Inuyasha started the war
"I am about to make a hanyou rug it will be very useful in front of the toilet to catch those stray drips,"
"That's it you die for real this time," Inuyasha bit the chase race was on
"Ah will they ever grow up and stop acting like spoiled brat puppies? Souta asked
"Naaaaah,"everyone replied